Six Minute Sex Ed

Welcome back to Six Minute Sex Ed, the podcast that helps families talk about sex and relationships, hosted by Sex Education Teacher, Kim Cavill. For more information about Kim, check out her website: https://www.teaandintimacy.com/ This week's episode of Six Minute Sex Ed is Level Two, perfect for families with teenagers, or anyone with unsupervised access to the internet/smartphone. We're going to talk about porn in three parts: Part one: What is porn and is it harmful? Part two: Is it safe? Part three: Is it real? We all need to learn how to be safe online. Here's a link to a resource families can use to learn how to be safe online: https://edu.gcfglobal.org/en/internetsafetyforkids/teaching-kids-about-internet-safety/1/ Remember: Nothing is ever really anonymous or deleted: the internet is written in ink, not pencil The internet is built on predictive algorithms, which feed you what they think you will like, not what is accurate, true, or “good” It is illegal to make or consume porn under the age of 18. The currency of the internet is NOT MONEY. It is attention, so we have to spend our attention like we spend our money. Everything we click on makes someone, somewhere money, so if we click on porn that is non-consensual, degrading, violent, or exploitative, we are participating in that degradation, violence, and exploitation. Therefore, each click represents an opportunity to shape the world and the way we respond to it. Conversation starters: 1. How do you feel about porn? 2. How do you stay safe online? Thanks for listening. Remember, to keep the podcast ad-free, support Kim on Patreon for $3/month: https://www.patreon.com/sexpositiveparent

Welcome to Six Minute Sex Ed, the podcast that helps families talk about sex and relationships. My name's Kim Cavill, I'm a sex education teacher, and you can learn more about me at http://teaandintimacy.com/ This week's episode is Level One, perfect for listeners of any age, but especially great for families with younger listeners - and it's all about puberty. What is puberty? Puberty is the name for a series of changes bodies go through as they transform from children into adults and usually starts some time between the ages 7 - 16, though some people start earlier and some people start later. Puberty starts when when the brain releases a hormone called GnRH. GnRH causes the pituitary gland, which is a very small gland just under the brain, to make two more puberty hormones: LH and FSH. Everyone has these hormones in their bodies, but they can work on different bodies in different ways. LH and FSH both tell bodies to make four other hormones: testosterone, androgen, estrogen, and estradiol. Those four hormones cause all of the changes of puberty we’re going to talk about today. Check out the following webpages for great information about puberty: Amaze.org - https://amaze.org/ KidsHealth.org - https://kidshealth.org/en/kids/grow/?WT.ac=k-nav-grow GenderSpectrum.org - https://www.genderspectrum.org/resources/parenting-and-family-2/ HRC resources for Transgender Children and Youth - https://www.hrc.org/explore/topic/transgender-children-youth It's important to remember puberty looks and feels different for each person. It helps to know where to get good information and who to talk to when you need support. There’s no one right way to grow up and even though puberty can make people feel different from everyone around them, like they’ll never fit in, it’s important to remember there isn’t one right way to be a person. We’re all unique, on the outside AND the inside, and our value doesn't come from what we look like or how we grow up. We're all enough, just as we are. Conversation starters: 1. Now that you know some of the changes that happen to people during puberty, how do you think you may feel when they happen to you? 2. If you think you might experience negative emotions, how do you handle them? What makes you feel better when you have negative feelings? Thanks for listening today! See you next week.

Welcome back to Six Minute Sex Ed, the podcast that helps families talk about sex and relationships. My name’s Kim Cavill. I’m a sex education teacher and I’m so glad you’re back! I make this podcast for busy families to listen to together. Listen together, then talk about it. For more info about me and how this podcast works, check out my website https://www.teaandintimacy.com/ This episode is Level Two, which means great for more mature listeners, especially families with teenagers. Today we're going to talk about racism, HIV, and AIDS. In every class I teach, students ask me if HIV came from people in Africa having sex with monkeys. That's not just wrong, it's racist. To understand why it's racist, we need to go back in time to the USA in the 1980s. People sometimes say that HIV started in the 1980s in the US, but this was just when people first became aware of HIV. In 1981, a few cases of rare diseases were being reported among gay men in New York and California. No one knew why these diseases and opportunistic infections were spreading, but they figured there must be a disease causing them. At first, the disease was called all sorts of insulting names relating to the word "gay", but by mid-1982 scientists realized the condition was also spreading among other populations. By September that year, the condition was finally named AIDS. Multiple presidential administrations ignored people’s suffering. George H.W. Bush famously said “its one of the few diseases where behavior matters,” which is obviously untrue and just an excuse to continue ignoring people’s suffering. Click this link to read about the activism people engaged in as a response: http://www.actupny.org/video/ In 1983, the CDC listed four main at-risk groups, including partners of people with AIDS, people who inject drugs, hemophiliacs and people who have recently been to Haiti. The absence of reliable information, along with the government silence, inflated the panic and stigma surrounding the epidemic. Click on this link to read more: https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/j.1467-9566.2012.01480.x People talked about the “4-H Club” at risk of AIDS: homosexuals, hemophiliacs, heroin addicts, and Haitians. They believed it was a disease African monkeys had and that it transferred to humans because African humans had sex with monkeys and spread it around. That myth was born of homophobia and racism. If you want to know the true origins of HIV, click here to read the research: https://www.avert.org/professionals/history-hiv-aids/origin Homophobia, queer phobia, transphobia, and racism all still play a role in limiting testing, treatment, and funding for care today. Many of our present day ideas about HIV come from the HIV images that first appeared in the early 1980s. The lack of information and awareness, combined with outdated beliefs lead people to fear getting HIV. Click here to read more about how stigma limits healthcare and treatment: https://www.avert.org/professionals/hiv-social-issues/stigma-discrimination and check out NMAC, which fights stigma in HIV and AIDS: nmac.org Conversation starters: Now that you know one way that racism impacts sex education and public health policy, what are other possible ways you can think of? What does HIV and AIDS education look like in your community? What do the curriculum materials look like and who do they speak to? Thanks for listening. Come back next week for another episode! *Addendum* I am grateful a supportive listener called me in to specify that I’ve never experienced racial oppression. I have experienced other types of oppression, but that oppression is not the focus of this episode of the podcast. Thank you to my wonderful listeners to engaging and learning with me in real time.

Welcome back to six minute sex ed, the podcast that helps families talk about sex and relationships. My name’s Kim Cavill. I’m a sex education teacher and I’m so glad you’re back. I make this podcast for busy families to listen to together. Listen together, then talk about it! For more info about me and how this podcast works, check out my website https://www.teaandintimacy.com/ This episode is Level One, which means it's great for listeners of any age, but particularly good for families with younger listeners. This episode is all about trustworthy grown-ups. We're going to start with a story: This is a story about a kid named Eve, who uses she/her/hers pronouns. Eve is ten and is disappointed because her babysitter left and she has to go to her older cousin’s house after school until her dad is done with work. She likes her cousin, Kia, well enough, but doesn’t know her very well, and her place is pretty boring. Eve watches TV until her dad comes to pick her up, but, lately, Kia has been watching TV with her, letting her watch shows that her dad never lets her watch. Kia tells Eve to keep it a secret, otherwise she won’t let her come over anymore. Kia gives Eve food she’s not allowed to have, too, and tells her to keep that secret. One day, while they’re watching TV, Kia pulls out something that looks like a pen and puffs on it. The smoke smells good, and she offers it to Eve, but tells her she has to keep it a secret, too, otherwise she’ll tell Eve’s dad she’s been watching stuff she isn’t allowed and get in big trouble. Eve wants to call her dad to ask for permission, but Kia says "No." Eve feels uncomfortable with all these secrets and is scared of getting in trouble with her dad. She gets a weird, twisted feeling in her tummy like she’s doing something dangerous. How is Eve feeling in this situation? How do we know if Kia is being trustworthy or tricky? Here's how we know if someone is trustworthy: They tell the truth They respect other people’s bodies. They respect privacy. They don’t ask children to keep their secrets. They ask other grown-ups for help, not children. They give you a safe, warm feeling - not a scary “uh-oh” feeling. They follow your family’s rules They’ll ask you to check with a parent to get permission. If someone doesn't do those things, or does the opposite of those things, they're being tricky and you should ask a trustworthy grown-up for help. Click on this link to download a printable you can use to remember who your trustworthy grown-ups are: https://docs.google.com/drawings/d/e/2PACX-1vQOctwvjm0vH2oSo6NFnQHXGhM1FL6r_7pvpP0y_88X3EwDdXSrcs6eAQgMsLR-e1muVGdMqYbEz6MB/pub?w=960&h=720 Grown-ups can do this, too! Click on this link to download a printable you can use to figure out your family's support network: https://docs.google.com/drawings/d/e/2PACX-1vRICjYst6fqawG5inGagklvzq7TMtJwvs6QjUfe_Qp0Y-5LlZFscmN3sOMxuv_ML8oOeOqKbQSWG-2W/pub?w=960&h=720 Conversation starters: 1. How do you know if someone's trustworthy? 2. Describe a time in your life that someone was being tricky and you needed to ask someone trustworthy for help. If you like the podcast, share it with a friend, rate/review, and support me on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/sexpositiveparent See you next week.

Welcome back to Six Minute Sex Ed, the podcast that helps families talk about sex and relationships. My name’s Kim Cavill. I’m a sex education teacher and I’m so glad you’re listening. I make this podcast for busy families to listen to together. Listen together, then use my conversation starters to talk about it. It's sex ed made simple. For more info about me, check out my website: https://www.teaandintimacy.com/ This episode is level two, perfect for families with teenagers, and it's all about figuring out our sexual limits. Most of us get a lot of sex from porn, movies, TV, the internet, and the people around us. Unfortunately, most of those messages aren't about negotiating sexual limits and desires, which is a fundamental part of all sexual relationships. When it comes to messages about sexual negotiations, it's mostly just silence. It's easy to make assumptions about other people when we aren’t communicating, and that’s especially true in sexual relationships. In order to communicate our limits to other people, we have to know what they are, first. I've got a great activity to help you figure that out. I’m going to list a bunch of different intimate behaviors and I want you to label each one as green light, yellow light, or red light, either out loud or in writing. Click here to follow along with me, or print out the list at home: https://docs.google.com/document/d/e/2PACX-1vQVuU6zvelY1sKWWCYEouFTJRDnTT66RGiPQk0Fd4BfzcfxbTtboNYgfxbYPt3P1r7x3UsSNlRTZ5GG/pub Green light = things you want to do with a prospective partner Yellow light - things you're not sure if you want to do with a prospective partner Red light = things you definitely do not want to do with a prospective partner. Once you've gone through the list, you'll have a better understanding of your limits. The green light represent things you're comfortable doing. The yellow lights represent your "soft limits", e.g. the things you may need do to more research on, or things you need to talk through with prospective partners before going ahead. Red lights represent your "hard limits", or things that you don't want to do and aren't up for negotiation. It's important to remember that these limits can change over time. What is comfortable now may not be comfortable in the future and vice versa. Sometimes, people figure out their sexual limits when they're in the moment: what they thought they were comfortable doing feels really uncomfortable in the moment and they want to stop. That's OK. Consent can be revoked for any activity at any time with the expectation that the revocation be respected. This article is a great place to read more about sexual negotiation in long-term relationships: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/relationships/sexual_negotiation_for_the_long_haul Conversation starters: practice communicating with an imaginary partner about one of the behaviors you labeled as a yellow light or red light. Thanks for listening! Remember, if you like the podcast, support the podcast. Share it with a friend! Rate/review on iTunes and support me on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/sexpositiveparent

Welcome back to Six Minute Sex Ed, the podcast that helps families talk about sex and relationships. My name’s Kim Cavill. For more info about me and how this podcast works, listen to the intro episode, or check out my website https://www.teaandintimacy.com/ Today’s episode is level one, so it's perfect for listeners of any age: Let’s talk about penises A few weeks ago, we talked all about the vulva, this week we'll focus on penises. But, we’re not just going to talk about penises, we’re going to talk about all the external parts that typically come along with a penis, too. The parts we're going to learn about include the scrotum, testicles, epididymis, and penis. Here's a link to a diagram you can use to follow along: https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/male-reproductive.html?ref=search Let’s talk about the scrotum, first. The scrotum, or scrotal sac hangs under the penis. It contains the testicles and epididymis. During puberty, which is a time when bodies transform from children into adults who can reproduce, or make babies, the testicles, or testes, begin to produce and store millions of super tiny sperm cells. Puberty starts between the ages of 9-15. Testicles are oval shaped and they also produce hormones, especially the hormone testosterone, which plays a big part in puberty. They’re also very sensitive to touch and temperature. The scrotum changes size if it feels cold or warm. When the body feels cold, the scrotum shrinks a little to try and keep warm. When it's hot, the scrotum becomes a bit bigger to cool down. This happens without having to think about it. The epididymis is a light‑colored tube, one for each testicle, where sperm is stored. It also connects to tubes inside the body that move sperm around, once the body is old enough to make sperm. The penis has two parts: the shaft and the glans. The shaft is the long part of the penis and the glans is the tip (sometimes called the head). At the end of the glans is a small slit or opening, which is where sperm or pee can come out. The inside of the penis is made of a spongy tissue that can get bigger or smaller, stiffer or softer. The penis can get bigger and stiffer when it’s touched, or sometimes when it’s not being touched. All penises are born with a foreskin, a fold of skin at the end of the penis covering the glans. Some penises get circumcised, or cut, which means a grown-up cuts the foreskin away, usually when the person is a baby. Cutting the foreskin off is not necessary, but parents still sometimes make the decision to do it, anyway, because of their religion or other concerns. All penises work and feel the same, regardless of whether the they’re cut or uncut. For more information about foreskin care, check out this webpage: https://www.rch.org.au/kidsinfo/fact_sheets/Penis_and_foreskin_care/ Penises are easy to take care of! Just gently wash with mild soap, rinse, and pat dry with a towel. If your penis is uncut, there is no need to pull the foreskin back for washing until it naturally detaches, which should happen by the age of 18. The first person to pull the foreskin back should be the person who’s penis it is: not parents or a doctor. Doctors should ask for permission before looking at or touching someone's penis or scrotum because those parts are private. Conversation starters: What did you learn today that you didn't know before? Where can you get more information about penises and how they work? Here are some good resources: http://www.cyh.com/HealthTopics/HealthTopicDetailsKids.aspx?p=335&np=289&id=2648 https://www.fatherly.com/parenting/how-to-explain-penises-preschoolers-little-kids/ http://www.isna.org/ Thanks for listening! If you like the podcast, support the podcast. Rate/review on iTunes, share it with a friend, and support me on Patreon.

Welcome back to Six Minute Sex Ed, the podcast that helps families talk about sex and relationships. My name’s Kim Cavill. I’m a sex education teacher and I’m so glad you’re back. Today’s episode: All about Oral Sex Kim starts by explaining what oral sex is: any stimulation of a vulva, anus, penis, or adult toy by someone’s mouth, tongue, or lips. Oral sex and hand sex, or stimulation of the vulva/penis/anus with hands and fingers, often go together, but today's episode focuses on oral sex. Kim covers various slang terms for oral sex: cunnilingus, blow job, fellatio, “suck off”, rimming, sixty nine, and analingus, then answers the seven most common questions young people ask in the classroom. 1. Is it sex? Yes, oral sex is a type of sex and it’s very, very common. It’s natural and nothing to be ashamed of or guilty about, no matter what other people say. 2. Can you get pregnant from oral sex? No, if we're just talking about straight up oral sex and nothing else, pregnancy isn't a risk. 3. Can you get STIs? Yes, all bacteria, viruses, and parasites that can be sexually transmitted can be transmitted through oral sex, including HIV. 4. How do you protect yourself from STIs? Correct and consistent usage of external condoms and dental dams are the best way to reduce the risk of STI transmission during oral sex. PrEP and PEP can be used to reduce the risk of HIV transmission, but do not prevent any other STIs. A dedicated PrEP/PEP episode is coming soon. Want to know how to use a condom? Check out this video: https://www.etr.org/videos/how-to-use-a-condom/ - Want to know how to use a dental dam? Check out this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqWr5GCizw0 5. Do you have to have oral sex? No. Sex is supposed to be a choice freely made, which means it's not OK to pressure people into sex. If that has happened in the past, or is happening, here are some resources for help - call RAINN at 1-800-656-4673 or use their online chat at https://hotline.rainn.org/online/ - or use text the Crisis Text Line to be connected to a counselor by texting HOME to 741741 6. What if I smell bad? Hygiene is super simple. No special douches or creams needed, just wash with a gentle soap like you do the rest of your body. Has the smell suddenly changed? Is the odor strong and foul? Time for a health check. Use this link to find a clinic: http://www.itsyoursexlife.com/stds-testing-gyt 7. How do I know if I'm doing it right? There is no one way to perform or receive oral sex. Knowing how to give or receive oral sex is not about mimicking pornography, which is sex as entertainment, not actual sex. Actual sex is about knowing yourself and your partner, being able to communicate, checking in with one another, and taking care of one another by minimizing risk. Conversation starters: What have you heard from other people about oral sex and how does what you've heard make you feel? Where in your area can you get external condoms and dental dams? (If you don't know, check out this link to find FREE condoms: https://www.teensource.org/condoms/free) Thanks for listening today! If you like the podcast, support the podcast. Rate/review wherever you get your podcasts and support me on Patreon for $3/month and get a private coaching session with me: https://www.patreon.com/sexpositiveparent

This episode focuses on communication. Kim starts with the familiar love language framing popularly used to facilitate communication about love between partners, but moves beyond that framing to reflect that love, itself, is not a single-dimensional feeling. Kim discusses getting in touch with our own desires, then asks two series of reflective questions to facilitate a conversation about how we communicate about those desires in our relationships. Question set one: How do you feel love physically? How do you feel love emotionally/spiritually? How do you feel love intellectually? Share these answers out loud with your partner. Question set two: How do you express love physically? How do you express love emotionally/spiritually? How do you express love intellectually? Share these answers out loud with your partner. You can use these questions to communicate about love, desire, and affection in all our relationships. These questions are especially interesting for parents to ask their children. Conversation starters: What was surprising about the answers to those questions? How do you think answers to those questions change over the course of a relationship? Thanks for listening. If you like the podcast, support the podcast. Rate and review on iTunes or wherever you get your podcasts, share it with friends, and become a Patron to get a private coaching session with me.

This bonus episode is all about one of my favorite ways to teach consent. It's called the consent game and it's a a great way to teach and practice consent for people of all ages. All you need is a table, people around the table, and either food or some objects in the middle. The game goes in three rounds: Round one: one person says the name of another person and asks them to pass a dish or an object. The person being asked can say "Yes" or "No". If the person says "No" the asker can ask someone else until someone says "Yes". When someone says "Yes", they pass the dish/object and it becomes their turn. The round continues until everyone has had a go. Round two: Players continue asking one another to pass dishes/objects, but cannot use their words. Players can only use facial expressions and hand gestures to ask people to pass dishes/objects and to communicate "Yes" and "No". This round gets pretty funny pretty fast, as people try to wiggle their eyebrows at one another in order to get a plate of mashed potatoes. The round continues until everyone has had a go. Round three: Players continue to ask one another to pass dishes/objects, but they are only allowed to use eye contact. No facial expressions, words, or gestures. This round continues until everyone has had a go, or it's too frustrating to continue. This game teachers verbal and non-verbal communication skills and why practicing them is so important in a really fun, non-confrontational way. Don't forget to rate and review the podcast and sign up on Patreon to book your private coaching session today.

This Level Two episode is all about the reasons why people have sex, perfect for families with teenagers. When I teach in schools and ask young people why people have sex, the most common response is pleasure. Sex is for pleasure. Sex is supposed to feel good - which means that if it doesn't feel good, it should stop. Pleasure is subjective, too, which is why it's important to learn to communicate about sex. In 2007 researchers Cindy M. Meston and David M. Buss published a paper titled Why Humans Have Sex.” They asked 444 people from ages 17 - 52 to list the reasons they or someone they know have sex. Here are some of the reasons they found: It feels good My friends pressured me into it I wanted to feel connected to the person The person had a lot of money It seemed like the natural next step in my relationship I wanted to brag to friends I wanted to have a child I realized I was in love It would damage my reputation if I said ‘‘no’’ I wanted to show my affection to the person I wanted to please my partner I was drunk I was attracted to the person I wanted to make up after a fight I wanted to breakup another’s relationship Someone forced me Do you think all of those reasons I listed are good reasons to have sex, or bad reasons to have sex? Are they a complicated mixture? If they are, that's OK, because sex is complicated. Sex is complicated because people are complicated. That’s why we’re talking about it. I have sex for different reasons: Pleasure Pleasure for my partner To feel closer with my husband To focus on my body Because it is a gift for myself and my partner There are reasons I choose not to have sex, too: Obligation Manage feelings like loneliness or self-doubt I also choose not to have sex when either myself or my partner has been drinking. Why are we talking about this? We are talking about this because it’s just as important for people to think about the reasons they want to have sex as it is to think about the reasons they don't want to have sex. Thinking about it allows us to think about how sex intersects with our personal values. The episode ends with conversation starters. “If you choose to have sex, why? What do you think sex is for?” “If you don’t choose to have sex, why not? What some reasons to avoid sex?” Thanks for listening. Make sure to rate and review the podcast on iTunes and become a Patron at www.patreon.com/sexpositiveparent to book private coaching sessions!

This level two episode is all about sexting - perfect for families with teenagers, or anyone with unsupervised access to a phone or computer. I touch on legality, coercion, and risk reduction. Let’s talk about nudes: Are the following things legal or illegal? -Asking a minor for nudes -Taking nudes of a minor -A minor taking nude selfies -A minor sending nudes to someone -Forwarding nudes of a minor -Sharing nudes of a minor -Possessing nudes of a minor Every single thing I listed is illegal in most states here in the US. Some states have Romeo and Juliet clauses for people who are close in age and near the age of consent. Make sure to check the laws of consent where you live. Adults usually say only one thing about sending nudes: Don't do it. However, that leaves out a lot of other important messages, starting with the age of consent. The age of consent is 17 or 18 in Illinois, which means underage sex is both illegal and high risk. This is true for both face to face sex AND digital sex. Digital sex with a minor, which includes asking for, taking, possessing, and distributing nudes, is illegal in Illinois for people below the age of 18 in Illinois, and most places in the US. "Don't send nudes" is not the most important message because asking a minor for nudes is just as illegal. Some young people participate in sexting because of pressure or coercion, so we have to talk about that, too. But, how? We acknowledge sexting is a common part of modern relationships, but is still a choice: no one has to participate if they don't want to and there can be long-term consequences for those that do. It also has to be consensual. We also need to be honest about legality of participating underage and have a frank discussion of family expectations around sexting, taking the law into account. If young people have already participated in these activities underage, not knowing it's illegal, check out this article: hellogiggles.com/news/if-someone-shares-your-sext/ and my website www.teaandintimacy.com/home for help. We end with conversation starters: If a friend was being bullied or pressured into sexting, what advice would you give them? How would you help? and If sexting is such a common part of modern relationships, but remains illegal for most young people, what are your family's expectations? Thanks for listening today, see you next time and make sure to subscribe, rate and review the podcast. Become a Patron for only a few dollars each month to book a private coaching session at www.patreon.com/sexpositiveparent

This level one episode is all about boundaries and consent - perfect for families with young people of any age, but especially good for families with younger listeners. Today’s episode: I’m the boss of my body. Kim Cavill says bodily autonomy means each person is the boss of their body, each person’s body belongs only to them, and no one should make a person do something with their body that they don’t want to do. Even if you’re a young person, this is still true. We are all responsible for our own bodies, which means we can’t use our bodies to hurt ourselves or others. When we use our bodies to threaten ourselves or others, someone more responsible has to step in and help. Kim Cavill tells a story to illustrate how bodily autonomy works. It's about a kid named Kai. Kai uses he/his pronouns and he’s at a big family party with lots of people and people are hugging him, even though he doesn't like hugs. His foster Mom is embarrassed when Kai refuses to hug someone and that person feels awkward. We talk through the emotions of each person in the story to practice empathy and relate these feelings back to the principles of bodily autonomy. The episode finishes with a conversation starter: How do you treat each other’s bodies in your family? Thanks for listening. Make sure to rate and review the podcast on iTunes and become a Patron at www.patreon.com/sexpositiveparent

This level one sex ed episode about privacy is perfect for families with younger listeners. Listen together, then talk about it! Like all episodes of Six Minute Sex Ed, it's informative, inclusive, and sex positive. Kim Cavill, sex education teacher, explains that privacy means being left alone, or being where other people can’t see. Boardmaker, which is a picture communication symbols that some people use instead of or in addition to spoken language, make this conversation with young ones really easy. Link to symbols here: https://us.123rf.com/450wm/vectora/vectora1609/vectora160900368/62195545-stock-vector-eye-symbols-as-show-hide-visible-invisible-public-private-icons-.jpg?ver=6 Public can be symbolized by an open eye because public means other people can see, and private can be symbolized by a closed eye because other people cant see. Kim goes on to talk about body privacy: which parts feel private and which ones don't. Then she talks about what things we can do with our bodies that are private and what things aren’t. Different families have different expectations and that's OK! Privacy is really about boundaries and it’s OK for people to decide what their boundaries are because each of us is the boss of their own body. To illustrate this, Kim tells a story: This story is about a kid named Charlie. Charlie uses he/him pronouns and he’s in the third grade. Lately, Charlie’s friends at school have been smacking his butt and laughing about it. Charlie doesn’t really like it and asks them to stop. His friends stop for a while, but then they do it again. He feels uncomfortable because he feels like his butt is private and doesn’t like it when people touch it without asking, even in a playful way. He is also frustrated that he asked his friends to stop and they won’t. He wants to tell the teacher, but he also doesn’t want to lose his friends, or make them think he’s a snitch. How would you feel if you were Charlie? How would you feel if you were Charlie’s friend? What do you think Charlie should do? Conversation starters: What parts of your body feel private to you? How do you handle privacy in your family? Thanks for listening today. Support the podcast by leaving a review, sharing it with friends, and becoming a supporter on Patreon.

This level two episode of Six Minute Sex Ed is all about abstinence. Kim Cavill talks about abstinence, what it is, what is isn't, and why it's confusing. Abstinence is freely choosing not having oral, anal, vaginal sex or genital skin-to-skin contact, all behaviors that carry some degree of risk, either of unplanned pregnancy and/or STI infection. That means if a person has oral and anal sex, but not vaginal sex, that person is not abstinent. If a person has oral sex and engages in genital skin to skin contact, but nothing else, that person is not abstinent. So abstinence is choosing not to have oral, anal, vaginal sex, or genital skin-to-skin contact. Abstinence is not the same as virginity. Virginity is a social construct, abstinence is a choice not to engage in oral, anal, vaginal sex, or genital skin to skin contact. A person can choose to be abstinent at any time, for any reason, in any context, including romantic relationships. Practicing abstinence is a great strategy to avoid pregnancy and STIs: practiced perfectly, it’s 100% safe. However, it can be hard to practice perfectly, which is why its still important to learn about birth control, contraception, STI prevention, and STI testing. Perfectly practicing abstinence until marriage only works as an STI prevention strategy if the spouse was also perfectly practicing abstinence, too. Conversation starters: What do you think abstinence is? What behaviors are included? In addition to abstinence, what are other strategies for avoiding pregnancy and STIs?

This Level One episode is all about the vulva and perfect for families with listeners of any age to hear. This podcast is inclusive of listeners of all gender identities, gender expressions, people who are non-binary, and people who are intersex. Kim Cavill, sex education teacher, talks about the differences between the vulva and the vagina. To see illustrations, check out these links: Island Sexual Health: https://i1.wp.com/www.islandsexualhealth.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/female-standing-and-internal-page-001-2-e1406138448799.jpg?ssl=1 The Vulva Gallery: https://www.thevulvagallery.com/gallery/ The vagina is a stretchy, flexible tube inside the body and the opening to that tube is part of the vulva, which is between the legs. Not everyone has a vulva. Some people have penises and testicles, and some people have something in between a vulva and a penis. The vulva includes: Mons pubis, which is the mound at the top of the vulva, covering the public bone Clitoris and clitoral hood Urethra, where pee comes out Outer/inner labia, which are folds of skin around the vaginal opening Vaginal opening (the vagina is where a tampon goes, or where fingers, a penis, or objects might go, or where a baby comes out during vaginal birth). The vagina is on the inside, the vulva is on the outside. Perineum - area below the vulva to the anus Anus - where the poop comes out, or where things may go in. Kim also talks about how to look after a vulva. How to clean it, how to touch it, and how to get it examined by a doctor. Remember, each person is the boss of their body and their body belongs to them, so they get to decide what they do and don't want to do with it, that includes their vulva. Thanks for listening. Make sure to rate and review the podcast on iTunes and become a Patron at www.patreon.com/sexpositiveparent