Leading Saints Podcast

Ross Trewhella has served as bishop of the Redruth ward in the Plymouth, England stake for nine years. He is from Cornwall, England, and joined the LDS Church while living in Utah. Ross is best known online as @ldsbishop on Twitter, where he offers up humorous insights into the role as part of the #twitterstake. Highlights 03:05 @ldsbishop and being a bishop for 9 years 10:35 The church in his area of the UK; going to the temple 14:05 His conversion story 21:55 Called as ward executive secretary: serving in a Christ-like manner firms up your testimony 23:40 Called as a counselor in the bishopric and then as bishop 27:20 Being bishop to the previous bishop, and characteristics of his ward 29:45 Ministering: Being good at looking after each other 31:05 Minimizing meetings and using technology to communicate as a bishopric 33:55 Ward service efforts for shelters, homeless charity, and food bank 35:25 Leadership principle #1: Keep a sense of humor 38:10 Leadership principle #2: Have skin as thick as a rhino 41:25 Leadership principle #3: Don’t procrastinate 43:45 Leadership principle #4: Listen more than you speak 47:30 Leadership principle #5: Let people serve and forgive them when they mess up 51:05 Managing callings and giving autonomy 53:45 Being open to different opinions and transcending culture and categories 1:03:45 Seeing people as Christ sees them Links @ldsbishop on Twitter #twitterstake on Twitter Signal app

Mamie Kanfer Stewart founded her first business at the age of 12 and her entrepreneurial spirit combined with the desire to optimize how people work led Mamie to build Meeteor, whose mission is to enable individuals and teams to thrive at work, with a special emphasis on effective meetings. Mamie is a dynamic speaker and has presented at numerous events and been interviewed on a variety of podcasts. She has been featured in Forbes, Inc, Business Collective, and PCMag, and writes about productivity, healthy team culture, and meeting best practices. She is also a nationally syndicated columnist and national media personality and the author of “Momentum: Creating Effective, Engaging and Enjoyable Meetings”. Highlights (8:30) Common meeting challenges #1: Meetings that don’t have a clear purpose * “I don’t know why we’re having this meeting” and “I don’t know why I’m at this meeting” * (11:35) How to create a clear purpose * Create a desired outcome – “I want the outcome of this meeting to be….” * Detailed agenda helps to see if meeting is leading to desired outcome (agenda is created from desired outcome) * (19:20) At beginning of the meeting or subsection of meeting, state the desired outcome (22:30) Six kinds of meeting types: * Make a decision * Create a plan * Generate ideas * Align people’s understanding (different than sharing information) * Connect (building relationships) * Produce (24:25) Common Meeting Challenges #2: How meetings end and what happens after * Record of the decisions made and next steps (stated and written) * Make record easy for everyone to access * (34:00) Meetings are a cycle * Decisions and next steps coming out of one meeting may become part of the desired outcome of the next meeting * Helps people get out of the mindset that meetings are discrete isolated events * (37:15) Importance of reviewing and revisiting meeting notes (42:00) Engaging meeting participants as a meeting leader (45:00) Best practices for avoiding meetings that should be emails * Could this outcome be achieved by another form of collaboration? (50:00) Creating space in a meeting for private reflection time (51:00) “Norms” – ground rules or expectations for how the conversation/meeting is going to be run Links Momentum: Creating Effective, Engaging, and Enjoyable Meetings, by Mamie Kanfer Stewart Successful Meetings Start with Why Advance Your Meeting Conversation with Norms 5 Practices to Make Every Meeting Matter www.mamieks.com On Twitter at: @mamieks www.meeteor.com 7 Unbreakable Rules of Church Meetings, by Leading Saints

Whitney Johnson is an expert on disruptive innovation and personal disruption, recognized as one of the 50 leading business thinkers in the world. She is a writer, speaker, consultant and coach on innovation initiatives for leaders. Her book, “Build an ‘A’ Team: Play to Their Strengths and Lead Them Up the Learning Curve” is the leadership handbook to accompany her previous book, “Disrupt Yourself: Putting the Power of Disruptive Innovation to Work”. Whitney served a mission in Uruguay and currently serves as a Laurel adviser. She and her husband live in Massachusetts and have two children. Highlights 06:20 Background of the book, “Build an ‘A’ Team” 07:30 It’s people who disrupt, not organizations, and when people are learning something new they are innovative and drive disruption innovation within their organization 08:20 Protesters who demand change vs. people who drive change 11:00 Being a leader means having humility and allowing others to have their own revelation 12:50 Applying the S curve to learning in church callings 18:00 The importance of engagement 22:50 Personal engagement fatigue and church callings 24:30 Comparing where we are today to our past 26:00 Is the life of someone we serve better because of what we have done? 28:15 Repetition and change 29:00 Changing the job description to what is needed now 31:30 Choosing leaders by who they are on the inside, choosing people for potential and what really needs to be done 35:30 The learning curves of people in a calling Links Previous Leading Saints interview with Whitney: Disrupting Your Calling WhitneyJohnson.com Whitney's books: Build an “A” Team: Play to Their Strengths and Lead Them Up the Learning Curve Disrupt Yourself: Putting the Power of Disruptive Innovation to Work Dare, Dream, Do: Remarkable Things Happen when you Dare to Dream

Cydney Afton Hatch is a polka-dot-wearing business owner, photographer, cupcake enthusiast and recently-turned writer, who through her work shares her personal experience with divorce and encourages others to rebuild their lives, redefine their relationship with God, and find peace. As a lifelong member of the church and always having a gift for finding and creating beauty, her biggest challenge was finding beauty in the aftermath of her divorce. Through her faith in Christ, she has found that even in the challenges of life there is beauty in the struggle. Turning to faith with patience, many tears, a big dose of laughter, and creativity, Cydney embraced her unexpected life and found beauty even in her struggles. Raised in the nation’s capital of Washington D.C., Cydney owns Afton Photography where her work has been featured in major publications including Cosmopolitan, The Hill, The Washington Post, and Minted. She received a bachelors of History from Brigham Young University-Idaho, has worked with the Boys & Girls Clubs of America, and currently works for Disruptive Advertising. She resides in Utah. Episode Highlights 4:15 Married in 2011 & divorced after 3 years 6:45 Peace about letting go of her marriage 7:30 How she sought help for her marriage 8:00 Going to see the bishop Talk about it—there needs to be more discussion in the church about divorce 12:45 Cydney’s decision to go to the bishop 17:00 The need for resources for single parenting & divorce in the church 22:15 What resources can help someone who is divorced feel love & stay active in the church 24:00 Divorce members need to be involved 26:00 The grieving process of divorce 31:45 Rock bottom is from where we rebuild 34:00 How bishops can help through & after divorce 38:30 Normalizing divorce in the church 40:00 How to include divorced members 43:30 Cydney’s journey since her divorce 45:15 How can a YSA bishop encourage a divorced member Links When Eternity is Not Forever wheneternityisnotforever.com Instagram: @wheneternityisnotforever Twitter: @WhenEternity Facebook: When Eternity is Not Forever

Murat Chakir is a pioneer for the LDS Church in his native country, Turkey. He joined the church while studying in Norway, served a mission to Arizona, completed his education at Brigham Young University, and then returned to Turkey where he served as branch president. He currently serves in the mission presidency of the Central Eurasian Mission, which includes Azerbaijan, Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, Tajikistan, Turkey, and Uzbekistan. Episode Highlights 4:55 Personal faith development before joining the church 10:00 School in Norway and discovery of Jesus Christ as more than a prophet 14:30 Meeting the LDS missionaries 16:00 Gaining a testimony of Jesus Christ as a truth-seeker from a Muslim background 18:20 Experiencing the Spirit through the missionaries 19:20 Joining the LDS Church 21:40 Gaining a testimony of a living prophet 23:20 Choosing to go on a mission 24:45 Mission to Arizona and resolution of passport issues 31:30 Working on Book of Mormon translation while at BYU 33:30 Joseph Smith translating the Book of Mormon compared to translating it into Turkish 35:00 Discovery of 1903 translation by Armenian missionaries; no animosity between nations within the gospel 39:50 Creating the Turkish name for the church 43:40 Return to Turkey and building the church there, from Babylon Street to Dove Street 47:30 Dedication of building by Elder Christofferson 48:25 Experiences as a branch president in a developing area with great challenges, and creation of website that brought in referrals 53:50 Muslim perspective of Christians in Turkey 54:35 Elder Holland quote about his experience dedicating Turkey 56:15 Growth of the church in Turkey 57:15 Attending the temple from Turkey 58:05 Continuing goals and efforts to reach truth-seekers and grow the church 59:50 Being part of a mission presidency over a large area with few members 1:02:00 Suggestions for struggling branch presidents: minister like Christ did 1:04:10 Using technology to create missionary experiences and conversions 1:07:50 We need to be out and listening to the people 1:08:25 Pray for the saints in Turkey, where ancient saints lived Links http://www.mormonum.org/

DeAnna Murphy is a leadership consultant, coach, facilitator, and speaker, and the founder/CEO of Strengths Strategy Inc. and its affiliate, People Acuity, where she consults businesses, coaches, and individuals. She was born in Provo, Utah, but grew up in Canada, and met her husband at Ricks College. They had three children and live in Minneapolis, Minnesota, where she has served as Stake Relief Society President. Highlights 5:25 How do we help ourselves and others stay fully engaged? 7:35 How can you understand your auxiliaries strength? 8:10 How can we apply engagement at home? 8:35 To be meaningfully engaged there must be a sense of connection, and an ability to understand your contribution and purpose alignment. 12:00 Understand your role/purpose 12:45 What is the bigger “why”? 14:00 Doctrine and Covenants 43:8,9 The Lord teaches Joseph Smith by council 15:20 Ask good questions/teach by council 19:30 Get correct counsel on core principles. 22:20 To feel alignment while teaching ask: What did you notice about that? What's important about that? What does that mean? What will you do? (How would you apply that?) Has anyone had an experience like that? 24:15 John 17- Why does He want us to be one so badly? That my joy might be fulfilled in you. 28:35 Which of these points in the lesson are important to Heavenly Father? 30:45 The council creates interdependence. 32:20 There is no engagement from a talking head. 33:20 Co-dependence is the primary voice of us vs. them. 34:15 There should not a be a “you people” in our church culture. 36:20 Our value does not go up and down like the stock market. 38:15 When people begin to see their value through the lens of strength they see God's DNA in them. 39:00 We need to understand our identity, but have lost it 41:50 If I'm not judging myself, I feel connected to other people and to God 42:10 Four categories of strengths Strategic Thinking Executing Relationship driven —Influencers —Relationship-builders 50:30 We are drawn to those like us because they validate us, and afraid of those who are unlike us because we do not understand them. 53:45 We disengage when our needs are not being met. 54:30 What does my patriarchal blessing show me about my strengths? 57:40 What can you count on me for? What do I need to feel confident? 59:00 The power of one-on-one ministering 1:00:00 During one-on-one interviews, pull up an extra chair for the Savior to sit with you as you minister 1:00:50 Be okay with no knowing, and always pray with them. 1:01:25 During the interviews ask them: How are you doing? What are you learning from the Spirit in your personal study? What are you learning in your assignment? These questions create connection. 1:05:00 Finally, ask tell me about the people that you are serving and what do they need? 1:06:15 Everyone is a "one" and there is great power in ministering and one-on-one interviews. 1"06:55 Ask your children—even grown children—what the Spirit is teaching them. 1:09:00 Experience with a group in Abu Dhabi learning six strengths strategies. 1:16:45 Read Moses 1:6 with your name instead of Moses: He will magnify your gifts through Him Links Print version of Shift Up!: Strengths Strategies for Optimal Living Ebook version of Shift Up!: Strengths Strategies for Optimal Living PeopleAcuity.com DeAnna's How I Lead interview: 

Born in Brazil and raised in Utah, David Neeleman is an entrepreneur who has founded or co-founded five commercial airlines: Morris Air, WestJet, JetBlue, Azul Brazilian Airlines and TAP Air Portugal. Morris Air was acquired by Southwest Air in 1993. David served a mission in Brazil as a young adult and speaks Portuguese. He and his wife have ten children, including one they adopted in recent years. The Neelemans have 18 grandchildren. David was featured in The Mormon Way of Doing Business and in Flying High. Episode Highlights 1:00: Undistinguished academic background in high school and University of Utah. Has ADD. Served LDS mission during period of explosive church growth in Brazil in the late 1970’s. Sold Morris Air to Southwest when he was 33 years of age. Wanted to remain passionately involved in something of value and not simply be an investor. Highlights of his involvement with the airlines referenced above. 5:40: Impact of serving a mission and the necessity of faith combined with works. Witnessed the area of Brazil where he served grow from five branches to five stakes in a very short time. 7:18: Father of a large family. Advice he gives his kids as they go to serve missions: lose yourself, don’t think about home excessively and love the people. 9:20: Missionary success began to shape his life. Invented e-ticket travel and in-home reservations by people who are working from home. Is wired to see things differently and attempt what no one else has done before without being discouraged by naysayers. Being entrepreneurial requires making sacrifices. 12:48: ADD discussed, including the fact that children in same family can be very different from one another. Proper encouragement is needed. Some great business leaders have suffered from ADD. Street wisdom about A, B, C and D students. 15:58: How the egalitarian structure of the Church has affected his business approach to dealing with employees and providing customer service. His thoughts about executive lunch rooms and parking spaces. Impact of satisfied employees on customer base. Discussion about pleasing employees vs shareholders. 21:00: Establishing a healthy culture by leadership style in Church organizations. Helping people feel fulfilled and loved, not guilty. Prayerful thought is required. 22:40: Establishing and leading by values. JetBlue’s values. Breaking the china when necessary. 25:45: Serving as ward mission leader for about eight years in New Cambridge, CT. 26:25: More on vision and values—what would Jesus do in setting the tone in Church organizations. Church service a respite from the “belly of the beast” all week long. Keeping values at the forefront. 29:00: Making time for family, not golf. LDS leavening influenced is needed in the world. People respond to leadership that is inspired by gospel principles even if it’s not presented as such. 33:00: David’s preferences for books, especially books about world progress and development more than books about leadership. Some favorites, other than religious, are: Outliers, David and Goliath, Tipping Point, Accidental Superpower and books about founding fathers of the U.S.A. 35:20: Founding the More Good Foundation. Helping maintain a positive image for the Church. Buying URL’s so that people on search engines have positive encounters online regarding the Church. 41:22: Being a better follower of Christ by learning to k...

Nola & Mike Patterson have been married for more than 26 years. Originally from the Alberta, Canada area, they now make their home in Las Vegas, Nevada. Brother Patterson has served in various callings, including Young Men presidencies, as an Elders Quorum President, in bishoprics, and as a bishop. He currently serves as an early-morning seminary teacher. Sister Patterson has served as a Young Women’s President and Relief Society President, among other responsibilities. Brother and Sister Patterson have found success in their leadership responsibilities as they have focused on ministering to individuals and families not well known to the ward and creating opportunities for those individuals to participate and serve. They have also focused on finding others to assist them in these efforts, realizing that there was only so much they could do on their own. In this episode of How I Lead, Brother and Sister Patterson discuss with Kurt their approach to reaching out and helping those who need ministering to. Leadership Principle #1: Focus on Ministering (19:00) Leadership Principle #2: Be respectful of people’s time (37:45) Leadership Principle #3: Do what you can and then let go (46:40) Leadership Principle #4: Seeking out those who are under utilized (52:30)

Interview Transcript Available Below Adam McHugh is a spiritual director, chaplain, speaker, and retreat leader. The author of Introverts in the Church: Finding Our Place in an Extroverted Culture, he is an ordained Presbyterian minister, having earned a Masters of Divinity and Masters of Theology in Greek New Testament from Princeton Theological Seminary. He is also the author of The Listening Life: Embracing Attentiveness in a World of Distraction, and lives in Santa Barbara, California. Episode Highlights 4:30 Becoming an ordained minister 7:30 What led to writing Introverts in the Church 10:50 Explanation of introversion and extroversion 16:00 Problems that introverts experience at church 19:00 Understanding the discomfort of personal vulnerability and sharing beliefs as an expression of faith 22:00 Introverts generally prefer depth over breadth 24:00 The power of listening: experience at a hospital 30:00 Introverts and small talk 34:00 How introverts approach dealing with conflict and decisions 40:00 Silence, reverence, and the internal experience compared to active social environments 45:20 Cultural clash of introvert and extrovert leaders: overcoming stereotypes and encouraging introverts to be leaders 48:50 Reaching out to invite introverts to participate Links * Adam's Website * Introverts in the Church: Finding Our Place in an Extroverted Culture * The Listening Life: Embracing Attentiveness in a World of Distraction Interview Transcript LS: Today we are communicating with Adam McHugh in California. How are you, Adam? ADAM: Doing very well. How about yourself? LS: Very good. Did I say your last name correctly? ADAM: You got it. LS: All right. Very nice, very nice. Now, you are, tell us (00:04:00) a little bit about what we need about know about you. The big thing I guess on this podcast we generally have LDS or Mormons on as guests, but you are not a Mormon. So what are you? ADAM: It is true. I am an ordained Presbyterian minister. Though in truth I go to an Episcopal church. LS: Nice. ADAM: But I was ordained in the Presbyterian church about 12 years ago. LS: Nice. And so what is the, when you say you're ordained, (00:04:30) what does that mean? Does that mean you went to seminary for awhile or what does that even mean? ADAM: It means they made me jump through about a thousand hoops, is basically what that means. I went to Princeton theological seminary and that is required for ordination, not Princeton. But going to seminary, getting a master's of divinity. I also stuck around for another year and got a masters of theology and Greek New Testament as well and had to do 2 church internships and one internship at a hospital as a chaplain, was actually (00:05:00) very instrumental in my future calling. And yeah. And then I had to go to about a thousand meetings in order to get approved. LS: Wow. Wow. Intense. ADAM: It was a, I would never do it again. I'm glad I was young when I went through all that because now it sounds exhausting. LS: So does that mean, I mean, your day to day or are you some type of pastor to a church or what's your day to day job now? ADAM: I have the title now, you know, writer and speaker and retreat leader (00:05:30) is really how I identify myself and certainly connected to churches and...

Gail Miller is the owner and chair of the board of directors of the Larry H. Miller group of companies, which includes 65 car dealerships, the Utah Jazz basketball team, Utah Bees baseball team, a chain of movie theatres, and related businesses. She is also a mother, a former Relief Society president, and the author of “Courage to Be You: Inspiring Lessons from an Unexpected Journey”. Episode Highlights * 1:45 How the book came to be * 6:15 Gail’s service experience as a Relief Society president * 10:55 Coming back from inactivity in the church * 16:40 Saying the right thing to those who are grieving * 18:10 Developing yourself as the spouse of a leader * 20:55 Patience as the wife of a busy entrepreneur and as a woman in the church * 25:00 Making decisions as a leader * 27:30 Stewardship and service Links Courage to Be You: Inspiring Lessons from an Unexpected Journey

Interview Transcript Available Below Tom Christofferson is a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints who experiences same sex attraction. He is also the brother of Elder D. Todd Christofferson of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. Tom grew up in the church as a member, served a mission and married in the temple. His short marriage ended and he came out as gay and lived that lifestyle for many years. He started coming back to church with Bruce Larson as a bishop and David Checketts as his stake president. Tom's story is told in his book, That We May Be One: A Gay Mormon’s Perspective on Faith and Family. As leaders we can learn a lot from his experience of coming back to church and being rebaptized. Episode Highlights * 6:30 Tom's story from the beginning * 9:30 His story of excommunication * 10:50 How his family wanted their love to be perfect as they accepted him * 13:20 Bishop Bruce Larson's side of the story * 16:00 Stake President David Checkett's side of the story * 18:00 Bishop Larson and President Checketts did not know at first that he was related to Elder Christofferson * 20:30 Sharing with the ward coucnil how to make feel Tom welcome * 22:30 Response of the ward council * 24:00 Tom was welcomed and loved unconditionally * 29:00 Tom attended the ward for 5 years before wanting to come back to live the commandments * 31:45 During the 5 years how Tom felt welcome in the ward * 33:20 Everyone focused on the the relationship with Tom and not his progress * 34:30 Study sessions with Tom and President Checketts * 38:00 Meeting with Tom's partner * 42:00 President Checketts meets with Elder Christofferson about Tom * 45:00 Tom Christofferson's rebaptism * 48:00 How this experience has helped Bishop Larson to be a better disciple of Jesus Christ * 50:00 How this experience has helped President Checketts to be a better disciple of Jesus Christ Links That We May Be One: A Gay Mormon’s Perspective on Faith and Family Register for the North Star Leadership Session President David Checketts (far left) and the Christofferson brothers Interview Transcript LS: [00:02:30] Welcome back to the leading LDS podcast. My name is Kurt Francom and today I have the opportunity to be in beautiful downtown Salt Lake City with and really, I'm across the world and we'll explain that in just a minute. But, let's start with you, Tom. I'm in the home of Tom Christofferson. How are you? Tom: Very well, thank you. Thanks for joining us. LS: Yeah, well, I'm excited to have this opportunity. And, mainly this interview came to be as you release your book, "That We May Be One, a Gay Mormons Perspective on Faith and Family" and you've been on the interview circuit for that. Tom: It's been an interesting journey. LS: I bet it's been very fulfilling to share your faith through, through this method. Tom: It has been a unique opportunity to be able to talk about my feelings about the Savior and the journey that I feel I have been led along. LS: Yep, obviously we'll get the, the obvious things out of the way. So, your last name is Christofferson and you are Elder Christofferson's brother. Tom: And he is my brother. LS: Oh, that's right. You are becoming more and more famous through this, these interviews. Tom: So, we are a family of five sons. He is the oldest and I'm the youngest. LS: Nice. I'm the youngest too, so I can, I can empathize with that. That's right. That's right. And now,

Interview Transcript Available Below Scott Mackintosh and his wife Becky live in Lehi, Utah and are the parents of seven children, including their son Xian, who came out as gay at age 24. Scott is currently a bishop in a YSA ward at BYU, and Becky is on the board at North Star International. Chris and his wife of 18 years live in Overland Park, Kansas  with their four sons, ages 7 through 17. He experiences same-gender attraction and began to talk about it after serving as a bishop. Travis Steward and his wife Margaret have been married 32 years and have six children and grandchildren. Travis is a former bishop, mission president (Houston, Texas), and has served in stake presidencies. He has experienced same-gender attraction throughout his life and finally began to talk about it a few years ago. In this podcast, we talk about how we can be better leaders week-to-week for the LGBT members in our wards and communities. Episode Highlights * 7:30 Chris' introduction and how he became involved with North Star through coming to terms with his same-gender attraction * 12:00 Scott Mackintosh’s story of his son coming out, and how that led to a change of heart for him and a conversion to love and empathy for everyone * 18:00 Travis Steward’s introduction and his experience as a man who experiences same-gender attraction but buried it for most of his life and struggled through shame and his own inner stories * 26:45 How Travis came out to his wife and openly acknowledged his same-sex attraction and began to deal with what he had held inside for so many years * 30:55 Chris’s experience coming out to his wife and church leaders after he had served as a bishop * 35:35 Scott’s realization that he needed to look at the experience of others instead of focusing on himself, how his son’s experience helped him realize how much shame is involved, and how it changed how he leads * 42:40 Proactively creating an open, safe, compassionate space to have these conversations and diminish shame * 48:00 What am I doing as a bishop to make sure that people would trust me and be willing to share the most personal, painful issues in their life? * 51:00 Bishops don’t have to know everything * 53:00 We need to be prepared so that when someone comes to us we can get it right the first time * 1:04:00 What to say or not say as a leader * 1:17:25 These are principles of the gospel of Jesus Christ that are applicable to everyone Links North Star Conference leadership session registration Scott's story mormonandgay.lds.org Interview Transcript   LS: Today I'm sitting down [00:05:30] with, both in person and through the magic of the Internet with a Travis Steward, Scott Mackintosh and Chris. How are you, Travis? Travis: Good, Scott, how are you doing? LS: Excellent. I have all sorts of names going through my head and Chris, you're joining us from, uh, from Kansas City. Is that, right? Chris: Right. LS: The reason for this gathering here is to hopefully promote a message of love and also make leaders out there [00:06:00] more aware of resources that are available to them as they strive to enhance their leadership ability, especially in the context of our LGBT brothers and sisters that, hopefully are finding a place in, in our congregations and our wards and in a place that they feel comfortable and they can worship with us there. It's, uh,

North Star is a faith-affirming resource for Latter-day Saints addressing sexual orientation and gender identity, and who desire to live in harmony with the teachings of Jesus Christ and the doctrines and values of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. North Star has been a remarkable partner with Leading Saints to help leaders better understand the experience of LGBT members of the Church. North Star has their annual conference coming up March 15-17 with Saturday (17th) including a free leadership session for lay leaders of the Church. THIS IS A MUST ATTEND OPPORTUNITY! We can't stress enough how much this free leadership event would enhance your ability to lead. If you are in a realistic travel distance you will not regret making it a priority on March 17th. To attend the free leadership session you must REGISTER HERE. To give you a sense of how helpful these leadership sessions are, North Star was kind enough to allow us to publish a leadership session from the 2017 North Star conference for this weeks Leading Saints podcast episode. Be sure to listen above! Episode Highlights Joseph Stith knew from an early age that he experienced same gender attraction. He married the one workman he had been attracted to in his lifetime, that he met right before putting his missionary papers in. As a young man getting married he thought that would take care of his SSA (5:00). * Nearly everyone at the conference had been experienced someone coming out to them (2:20) * Shared a story of a member going into a disciplinary council and was blown away that all of the leaders learned as much as they could from the Mormonandgay.lds.org website (2:54) * Joseph joined the Marine Corps and became a drill instructor, to help him “overcome” his SSA (5:30) * When he was almost at a crisis of faith, he turned to his family, the temple and church callings (6:00) * After being released from his calling he found his SSA spiraling out of control. He was recommended to go to a blog, where he then found that he wasn’t alone. 7:30 * Dealing with the age of the individual 10:36 * The most painful thing that he has heard is after a youth tells their bishop and then says they ignored them for two years. 11:38 * Truth and fiction (12:09) * Fiction: If someone has same gender attraction, they should not associate with others of the same gender who also has same gender attraction. Menfindingpeace.blogspot.com, offers men supporting other men with SSA. * Fiction: SSA is an addiction or Sin. * Truth: Coming out to themselves is the first step (15:30) * Truth: Coming out to others at their pace and at their choice is part of the healing process (15:39) * Personal Crisis of Faith: Individuals bargain with the Lord (16:06) * How do people identify if the are SSA. The church has accepted that it’s ok to be SSA (16:34) * Remember the spouse is on their own journey. (18:06) * Just listen first, don’t try and fix it! (19:07) * If you recommend therapy, know what it is you are recommending the therapy for. (19:49) * All of us are children of our Heavenly Father have two innate needs (21:51) * To be accepted by others (particularly God) * Fear rejection * What to Say and What not to say 22:35 * Don’t: * I suspected it all along. * We all have our challenges. * If you have enough faith.

Alex Wittingham is a Utah resident, lifetime member of the LDS church, student, returned missionary (New Zealand), football player and son of University of Utah head football coach, Kyle Wittingham and his wife Jamie. Following his missionary service Alex began playing football as a long snapper on the U of U football team. Alex loved his mission, had wonderful companions and a supportive mission president. However, he returned home early following 15 months of dedicated service. The reason for his early release was a combination of anxiety, depression and OCD tendencies. * 5:02 Recognized some OCD tendencies by age 12 but assumed it was normal and didn’t have a name for it. There was no dramatic increase in the intensity level until his missionary service when feelings of anxiety were exacerbated without the relief valves he enjoyed before his mission (movies, being with friends). * 9:04 Alex discusses his decision to serve a mission and feeling a lack of confidence as he tried to envision himself as a missionary. Was nevertheless overjoyed in being called to serve in New Zealand. * 11:40: MTC experience brought on added anxiety, notwithstanding wonderful and supportive fellow missionaries who helped him cope. * 14:00 Arriving in New Zealand and facing new realities: contacting strangers. Obsessing over scrupulosity, even though he had done everything necessary to render himself worthy to serve prior to entering the mission field. Being OCD and living in a world of spartan obedience to rules. * 18:45 His anxiety and other issues came and went in phases during his missionary service. Opening up to his family in P-day letters was therapeutic. * 21:00 Confiding in empathetic companions and his very supportive mission president. Referred to LDS Family Services in New Zealand. * 23:15 Turning point—beginning to feel at peace regarding the value of his missionary service and the likelihood of an early departure. * 26:10 Returning home; weekly counseling continued; coping and managing; useful medications and learning new coping skills. * 27:50 Being supported by family and close friends through any feelings of “stigma.” “Your mission is between you and God.” * 29:40 The role of his loving stake president and his reassuring bishop in helping him get re-integrated into the ward family. * 31:00 Concluding thoughts: Alex is glad he served and loved his mission. It was life-changing and not a mistake. It had not occurred to him, prior to his mission, that he suffered from anything out of the ordinary. He’s glad there now seem to be more pre-mission questions regarding mental wellness. He wonders if leaders recommending candidates for missions should obtain the view of the youth’s parents about any possible emotional or mental conditions that would impact on the ability to serve. * 36:12 Why Alex suddenly chose to tweet about his experience following the suicide of a popular singer—desire to help someone else. Describes response to his tweet and a related article in a local newspaper. * 38:50 Words of encouragement to fellow sufferers—You are not alone. There is support in the form of angels on earth. Don’t be afraid to reach out and accept help. Links: * The OCD Mormon * Chad Lewis Interview * Salt Lake Tribune Article * Anxiety Disorders and Mormonism Confer...

Whitney Johnson started as a secretary on Wall Street while taking business classes at night. She worked her way up as a successful investment banker. She later co-founded an investment firm with Harvard Business School’s Clayton Christensen. She is an accomplished author of several books, Dare, Dream Do, and Disrupt Yourself. Her newest book coming out this May is called, Build An “A” Team: Play To Their Strengths and Lead Them Up The Learning Curve. Whitney grew up in San Jose California. She also served a mission in Uruguay for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. She attended Brigham Young University and received a B.A. in music. While at BYU she met her husband and they were married in the Temple. They currently live in Lexington Virginia and have two children, a son and a daughter. Whitney and her husband have been married for 31 years. Podcast Highlights: * 10:35 In her twenties Whitney asked herself, “Do I believe” While she took a step back her husband fasted for her on and off for two years. * 13:13 While serving in her current calling she realized, I don’t need to save them just love them. * 18:20 Early in her career she started a blog to help her discover what her dreams were. * 19:30 Every man and women needs to learn how to be a ship and a harbor. * 21:00 Her first book came out in 2012 Dare Dream Do: Remarkable Things Happen When You Dare To Dream. * 22:30 She later wrote the book Disrupt Yourself: Putting The Power Of Disruptive Innovation To Work. * 23:00 A disruptor is a silly thing that takes over the world. When you disrupt yourself you take over your world. * 24:13 Disrupting is managing change. * 26:08 How do you disrupt yourself or your ward? Seven Levels of Change #1 Take the right kinds of risk 28:05 * 28:05 Serve the Lord the way you need to using your talents. * 31:25 Ask yourself what I want to accomplish in this calling. #2 Play to your distinctive strengths in your calling. 32:42 * 34:40 What am I bringing to the table in regards to my calling. * 36:26 Think about the things that make you feel strong. * 36:46 Think about what exacerbates you. That is one of your strengths. * 37:08 What compliments do you get all the time? That is your super power. * 37:21 Read your patriarchal blessing. Look for your spiritual gifts while reading it. * 38:30 Are you using your strengths and your super powers deliberately in your calling? #3 Embrace Constraints 38:51 * 39:08 How do we turn those constraint into a tool of creation? * 40:20 Elders Bednar's 2017 General Conference address Bear Up Their Burdens With Ease is a great example of how our load is what gets them out. * 42:04 Elder Carmack's address about the Powers of the Priesthood is a great example to use your Priesthood Power at its fullest. * 42:19 Be prayerful and listen to the Lord. * 43:59 Communicate and be open about your constraints with your Bishop. * 45:19 Extend callings and invite them to pray about it first. #4 Battle Entitlement 45:56 * 46:57 The Church helps battle entitlement by the way it is organized, and callings change. #5 Give Failure its Due 48:45 * 48:52 Reframe your failures. * 49:29 We believe we can change, but we don’t always act like we believe it. * 50:11 Be open about the things that are hard for us. * 51:45 Ask yourself, “how can I make meaning of this?” * 51:39 Shame limits disruption, not failure. #6 Step Back in Order to Grow 53:51 * 54:20 In church we step back to grow as we get new callings. #7 Be Driven By Discovery 55:03