Bearded Gentlemen Music Podcast

Welcome to the Ad Read podcast, a podcast where we read ads. Disclaimer: Any references to products/companies real or fake reflect our opinion alone and not the opinion of the companies in question. This is especially true of the fake companies, who can be real assholes about this sort of thing. Subscribe to Ad Read in these places: Apple | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn | SoundCloud | Google | Android Subscribe to the entire Bearded Gentlemen Feed: Apple | Android In this episode, we read ads from the following companies: Magic Force If you are of any magic ability, join the Magic Force to fight the forces of evil. All The Feels Cure yourself of sociopathy! It’s extremely easy. Ding Dongs Don’t worry about diabetes or any diseases like that. Just eat as many ding dongs as you like. A Message From Mayor Moon Prince The mayor is making some changes, and that rules. Vu Tan Clams An apology, sort of, from Vu Tan Clams clam farm. Dog Circus A family run dog circus that you really have to come see. Something else… Maybe you like one of the products advertised on this podcast. That’s really cool! Upload here or email the podcast at adreadpodcast at gmail.com with your testimonials. You can send these as either a written testimonial or an audio testimonial. Either way, we may include it on the show! That’s cool as fuck, and I’m the creator of this podcast so I would know. Another Thing? If you have a business you want to advertise on the podcast, you can also email us at adreadpodcast at gmail.com! We’d love to read your ad! (Additional writing for this podcast by Jon Robertson and Aaron Cooper. Additional acting by Jon, Cheru, and Ed Carroll.)

Welcome to the Ad Read podcast, a podcast where we read ads. Disclaimer: Any references to products/companies real or fake reflect our opinion alone and not the opinion of the companies in question. This is especially true of the fake companies, who can be real assholes about this sort of thing. Subscribe to Ad Read in these places: Apple | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn | SoundCloud | Google | Android Subscribe to the entire Bearded Gentlemen Feed: Apple | Android In this episode, we read ads from the following companies: The Barberton Television Network Barberton now has two television channels. Check out the new channel. It’s called “Channel 2”. Olive Garden I’m told this is a restaurant. Check out this ad to see if you’d want to eat here. Flavor Blasters’ Flavor Blockers If you can’t take blasts of flavor, this is a product for people who are too big of wimps to eat food like big kids. Barberton Municipal Zoo Barberton’s zoo has a new jingle from DJ Pontiac Beavers! That’s pretty cool, right? A Message From The Wu-Tang Clan Stop appropriating culture. Something else… Maybe you like one of the products advertised on this podcast. That’s really cool! Upload here or email the podcast at adreadpodcast at gmail.com with your testimonials. You can send these as either a written testimonial or an audio testimonial. Either way, we may include it on the show! That’s cool as fuck, and I’m the creator of this podcast so I would know. Another Thing? If you have a business you want to advertise on the podcast, you can also email us at adreadpodcast at gmail.com! We’d love to read your ad! Additional writing and acting for this podcast by Jon Robertson and  Aaron Cooper. 

Welcome to the Ad Read podcast, a podcast where we read ads. Disclaimer: Any references to products/companies real or fake reflect our opinion alone and not the opinion of the companies in question. This is especially true of the fake companies, who can be real assholes about this sort of thing. Subscribe to Ad Read in these places: Apple | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn | SoundCloud | Google | Android Subscribe to the entire Bearded Gentlemen Feed: Apple | Android In today’s episode, Barberton is selecting a new mayor! Or, more specifically, Bobathon Huxley, Barberton’s city council treasurer is selecting a new mayor while the rest of the city council is off at taco night. Check out the audio applications from the finalists and then stick around to hear who gets to be the new mayor. This is democracy in action.   Something else… Maybe you like one of the products advertised on this podcast. That’s really cool! Upload here or email the podcast at adreadpodcast at gmail.com with your testimonials. You can send these as either a written testimonial or an audio testimonial. Either way, we may include it on the show! That’s cool as fuck, and I’m the creator of this podcast so I would know. Another Thing? If you have a business you want to advertise on the podcast, you can also email us at adreadpodcast at gmail.com! We’d love to read your ad! (Additional writing and acting for this podcast by Jon Robertson and Cheru. Additional acting Ed Carroll.)

Welcome to the Ad Read podcast. We’re not like those other podcasts that fluff the running time with needless content. We get straight to the ad reads, bringing you, the consumer the product information you crave. No need to skip ahead, no filler, just poorly read ad copy from all the brands you love. Disclaimer: Any references to products/companies real or fake reflect our opinion alone and not the opinion of the companies in question. This is especially true of the fake companies, who can be real assholes about this sort of thing. Subscribe to Ad Read in these places: Apple | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn | SoundCloud | Google | Android Subscribe to the entire Bearded Gentlemen Feed: Apple | Android An episode about leaders and followers, leading off with the following ads: Citizens for the Sun God Burn everything, please. And start a chapter of Citizens for the Sun God in your city. Chocolate Blasters Flavor Blasted Chocolate Cereal A brand new jingle for this amazing cereal. Wu-Waxers Wax your Wu-Whiskers with Wu-Waxers. Mark’s Mom’s Chicken Pot Pie Maybe the best pot pie in all of Barberton. Robos Please purchase these robots. Beep. Boop. The Barberton City Council Barberton is looking for a new mayor! Do you want to be the mayor? Cool, apply!   Something else… Maybe you like one of the products advertised on this podcast. That’s really cool! Upload here or email the podcast at adreadpodcast at gmail.com with your testimonials. You can send these as either a written testimonial or an audio testimonial. Either way, we may include it on the show! That’s cool as fuck, and I’m the creator of this podcast so I would know. Another Thing? If you have a business you want to advertise on the podcast, you can also email us at adreadpodcast at gmail.com! We’d love to read your ad! Additional writing and acting from Aaron Cooper, Jon Robertson and Ed Carroll. Additional acting from Cheru .

Welcome to the Ad Read podcast. We’re not like those other podcasts that fluff the running time with needless content. We get straight to the ad reads, bringing you, the consumer the product information you crave. No need to skip ahead, no filler, just poorly read ad copy from all the brands you love. Disclaimer: Any references to products/companies real or fake reflect our opinion alone and not the opinion of the companies in question. This is especially true of the fake companies, who can be real assholes about this sort of thing. Subscribe to Ad Read in these places: Apple | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn | SoundCloud | Google | Android Subscribe to the entire Bearded Gentlemen Feed: Apple | Android In today’s episode, we read the following ads: What’s In The Box A jingle for the mystery box company What’s In The Box? Hmmmm… This one doesn’t seem great. Piss Pour The innovative new way to keep track of your loved ones. Citizens For The Sun God Show the sun gun that you love the sun! That sounds like some fun! Extra Strength Halloween Candy For all of your Halloween candy needs, use this candy, okay? Coldma from Medical Mart The best way to get over a cold. Decorative Wooden Spoons Outlet The cheapest prices on decorative wooden spoons. Something else… Maybe you like one of the products advertised on this podcast. That’s really cool! Upload here or email the podcast at adreadpodcast at gmail.com with your testimonials. You can send these as either a written testimonial or an audio testimonial. Either way, we may include it on the show! That’s cool as fuck, and I’m the creator of this podcast so I would know. Another Thing? If you have a business you want to advertise on the podcast, you can also email us at adreadpodcast at gmail.com! We’d love to read your ad! (Additional writing for this podcast by Jon Robertson, Sam Carlin and  Aaron Cooper. Additional acting by Jon, Aaron, Cheru, Ed Carroll, she who shall not be named and Sam.)

Welcome to the Ad Read podcast. We’re not like those other podcasts that fluff the running time with needless content. We get straight to the ad reads, bringing you, the consumer the product information you crave. No need to skip ahead, no filler, just poorly read ad copy from all the brands you love. Disclaimer: Any references to products/companies real or fake reflect our opinion alone and not the opinion of the companies in question. This is especially true of the fake companies, who can be real assholes about this sort of thing. Subscribe to Ad Read in these places: Apple | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn | SoundCloud | Google | Android Subscribe to the entire Bearded Gentlemen Feed: Apple | Android In today’s episode, we read the following ads: Mcklenburger Glue The best in all natural glue. Best ingredients. Best machines. Best glue. Generations of tradition and innovation make this glue the top name in glue. W.E. Corporation Buy shares of Willy’s Excellence, a fortune 500 cookie company. Waste your money on something cool. Please. It’s much needed. Salutations Simulations Get the perfect life, guaranteed. Forget reality. Choose happiness instead. Medical Mart Check out all these services from Medical Mart! But mostly plastic surgery! It’s great! Stand Up Sam Barberton’s most controversial stand up comedian has a new comedy special on Barberton Channel One. Something else… Maybe you like one of the products advertised on this podcast. That’s really cool! Upload here or email the podcast at adreadpodcast at gmail.com with your testimonials. You can send these as either a written testimonial or an audio testimonial. Either way, we may include it on the show! That’s cool as fuck, and I’m the creator of this podcast so I would know. Another Thing? If you have a business you want to advertise on the podcast, you can also email us at adreadpodcast at gmail.com! We’d love to read your ad! (Additional writing for this podcast by Jon Robertson. Additional acting by Jon, Aaron Cooper, Cheru, Ed Carroll, and Carter Rodriguez of Chase Down Podcast.)

Welcome to the Ad Read podcast. We’re not like those other podcasts that fluff the running time with needless content. We get straight to the ad reads, bringing you, the consumer the product information you crave. No need to skip ahead, no filler, just poorly read ad copy from all the brands you love. Disclaimer: Any references to products/companies real or fake reflect our opinion alone and not the opinion of the companies in question. This is especially true of the fake companies, who can be real assholes about this sort of thing. Subscribe to Ad Read in these places: Apple | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn | SoundCloud | Google | Android Subscribe to the entire Bearded Gentlemen Feed: Apple | Android Today’s episode is a Christmas special that defies form and function. Something else… Maybe you like one of the products advertised on this podcast. That’s really cool! Upload here or email the podcast at adreadpodcast at gmail.com with your testimonials. You can send these as either a written testimonial or an audio testimonial. Either way, we may include it on the show! That’s cool as fuck, and I’m the creator of this podcast so I would know. Another Thing? If you have a business you want to advertise on the podcast, you can also email us at adreadpodcast at gmail.com! We’d love to read your ad! (Additional writing for this podcast by Cheru and Jon Robertson. Additional acting by Cheru and Jon. Soundtrack by Aaron Cooper.)

Welcome to the Ad Read podcast. We’re not like those other podcasts that fluff the running time with needless content. We get straight to the ad reads, bringing you, the consumer the product information you crave. No need to skip ahead, no filler, just poorly read ad copy from all the brands you love. Disclaimer: Any references to products/companies real or fake reflect our opinion alone and not the opinion of the companies in question. This is especially true of the fake companies, who can be real assholes about this sort of thing. Subscribe to Ad Read in these places: Apple | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn | SoundCloud | Google | Android Subscribe to the entire Bearded Gentlemen Feed: Apple | Android In today’s episode, we read the following ads: Arranged Carriage The ride share app for people who don’t know what’s best for them. Wu-Washers For anyone who wants their undergarments to be especially clean. Office Personas Nobody likes you, but maybe you can get a new persona and become noticed at work? Matador Napkins The most hardcore of napkins. Drugs Let’s do drugs! Something else… Maybe you like one of the products advertised on this podcast. That’s really cool! Upload here or email the podcast at adreadpodcast at gmail.com with your testimonials. You can send these as either a written testimonial or an audio testimonial. Either way, we may include it on the show! That’s cool as fuck, and I’m the creator of this podcast so I would know. Another Thing? If you have a business you want to advertise on the podcast, you can also email us at adreadpodcast at gmail.com! We’d love to read your ad! (Additional writing for this podcast by Jon Robertson. Additional acting by Jon, Cheru, Ed Carroll, Carter Rodriguez of Chase Down Podcast.)

Welcome to the Ad Read podcast. We’re not like those other podcasts that fluff the running time with needless content. We get straight to the ad reads, bringing you, the consumer the product information you crave. No need to skip ahead, no filler, just poorly read ad copy from all the brands you love. Disclaimer: Any references to products/companies real or fake reflect our opinion alone and not the opinion of the companies in question. This is especially true of the fake companies, who can be real assholes about this sort of thing. Subscribe to Ad Read in these places: Apple | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn | SoundCloud | Google | Android Subscribe to the entire Bearded Gentlemen Feed: Apple | Android In today’s episode, we read the following ads: Hot Dog Water Join the new health craze sweeping the nation with Hot Dog Water! So many different ways to use it, and all of them rule. Arson Assist Federation A new product update from the Arson Assist Federation. Subscribers and would-be subscribers, listen up! These changes could affect you or else. Jimmy’s Cursive School For Wayward Teens If you have troubled teens, bring them to Jimmy’s Cursive School. Jimmy wants to teach your teens cursive. Acura Whether you’re a busy parent or a stylish trust fund adult, Acura is the unassuming but stylish car for you. Hide and Seekers Oh, what are we hiding here? Something else… Maybe you like one of the products advertised on this podcast. That’s really cool! Upload here or email the podcast at adreadpodcast at gmail.com with your testimonials. You can send these as either a written testimonial or an audio testimonial. Either way, we may include it on the show! That’s cool as fuck, and I’m the creator of this podcast so I would know. Another Thing? If you have a business you want to advertise on the podcast, you can also email us at adreadpodcast at gmail.com! We’d love to read your ad! (Additional writing for this podcast by Cheru and Jon Robertson. Additional acting by Jon, Cheru, and he who shall not be named nor linked.)

Listen to interview excerpts here: Subscribe here: Apple | Android | Spotify | Google The Hostile Redemption is one of the Pop-Punk bands keeping the scene alive in Houston, Texas. Although they gained some traction as a cover band, their original music is what made them a band worth giving a listen too. Last month, following the release of The Hostile Redemption’s debut EP Reflections I got the chance to talk with lead singer Blake Hill.  We talked about the inspiration behind Reflections, who inspired the songs “Bait and Tackle” and “B.U.M.E.R”, and My Chemical Romance’s reunion. How did The Hostile Redemption come about? I played in an old band years before and left some of that content on YouTube. One of my two guitar players found it and reached out to me and pestered me for a couple of years to start a band with him. I finally gave in after about two years of endless “hey man we should start a band! We’re not getting any younger”. I figured let’s see where it goes! We found a drummer [Jacob] and he was really good and decided to start writing our own songs. It worked out a lot better than I anticipated that it would! Your music is really good! You enjoy [Reflections] then? Yeah, Like I was saying earlier my top song is probably still “B.U.M.E.R” right now. I listened to Reflections again and I liked “Bait [and Tackle].” “Bait and Tackle”! You want to hear a little fun fact? “Bait and Tackle” and “B.U.M.E.R” are actually about the same girl! She inspired a lot of moves back then, since I was eleven years old. That relationship did not work out during any of the many tries we given it, but I have to thank her for giving me the inspiration she did. Bait and Tackle are probably – in my own personal songs that I’ve written – my top five. That’s great. It’s always great that from the bad you can still get inspiration. Yes ma’am. I think the bad things that happen to us make the best songs. Totally, right with you on that! How has the reception to your Ep, Reflections, been so far? I have not heard one thing bad about the [Reflections] so far, which I was very pleasantly surprised to hear. [The songs] “B.U.M.E.R” and “Runaway” have been on Spotify and Apple Music for almost a year for “B.U.M.E.R” and over a year for “Runaway” when we released Reflections. Now all five of the songs on Reflections have gotten more plays than those two singles together. It’s wild to me! We’ve replaced our closing song “Runaway” with “Sins” now and it’s wild the amount of people that came out to our release party. It was amazing and I’m still living off of that high! It’s always cool to when your first playing [new music] how people perceive it! Exactly! When someone is actually enjoying what I’m doing and that’s the coolest thing ever! What is your favorite song to play live?   My favorite song to play live is probably “Sins” from the [Reflections] and “B.U.M.E.R”. “B.U.M.E.R” is so easy for people to sing along with the chorus and I get to hold my mic out to them and hear them sing out my own lyrics that I made was just, you know, the euphoria that comes from that feeling is just unexplainable. Then “Sins”, I’ve been working hard on learning how to do screaming vocals for about six years. And I didn’t get to tell my band members that I was trying that, so I randomly decided to it during “Sins”,

Welcome to the Ad Read podcast. We’re not like those other podcasts that fluff the running time with needless content. We get straight to the ad reads, bringing you, the consumer the product information you crave. No need to skip ahead, no filler, just poorly read ad copy from all the brands you love. Disclaimer: Any references to products/companies real or fake reflect our opinion alone and not the opinion of the companies in question. This is especially true of the fake companies, who can be real assholes about this sort of thing. Subscribe to Ad Read in these places: Apple | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn | SoundCloud | Google | Android Subscribe to the entire Bearded Gentlemen Feed: Apple | Android In today’s episode, we read the following ads: Barberton City Council Presents: A DJ Pontiac Beavers Production: DJ Pontiac Beavers’ End of World Sex Party A sex party hosted by DJ Pontiac Beavers! Including some of Barberton’s most famous stars! Moon Prince Industries Find out how exactly Moon Prince Industries was able to kill The Earth Wizard and put the moon in a position to end all life on Earth. You’ve Heard It All Before The sitcom that reenacts all the best movies. Find My Penis Did your penis get lost in the fourth dimension? This is a good way to find it.   Something else… Maybe you like one of the products advertised on this podcast. That’s really cool! Upload here or email the podcast at adreadpodcast at gmail.com with your testimonials. You can send these as either a written testimonial or an audio testimonial. Either way, we may include it on the show! That’s cool as fuck, and I’m the creator of this podcast so I would know. Another Thing? If you have a business you want to advertise on the podcast, you can also email us at adreadpodcast at gmail.com! We’d love to read your ad! (Additional writing for this podcast by Jon Robertson. Additional acting by Jon, Aaron Cooper and Tatiana Maria.)  

Welcome to the Ad Read podcast. We’re not like those other podcasts that fluff the running time with needless content. We get straight to the ad reads, bringing you, the consumer the product information you crave. No need to skip ahead, no filler, just poorly read ad copy from all the brands you love. Disclaimer: Any references to products/companies real or fake reflect our opinion alone and not the opinion of the companies in question. This is especially true of the fake companies, who can be real assholes about this sort of thing. Subscribe to Ad Read in these places: Apple | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn | SoundCloud | Google | Android Subscribe to the entire Bearded Gentlemen Feed: Apple | Android In today’s episode, we read the following ads: Offices of The Earth Wizard and Apprentice The Earth Wizard is missing, but don’t panic. Beulah, the Apprentice to The Earth Wizard, is still holding the moon at bay. We’ll be fine. Probably. It’ll probably be fine. Don’t sweat it. Flavor Buckets Forget your old buckets that don’t have any flavor. New from Flavor Blasters is the Flavor Blasters Flavor Bucket. Throw your old buckets down the stairs because these buckets are blasted full of flavor blasts of blasted flavor. Pixie Stix Pour that sugar down your face hole. Assisted Sewerside Retirement Community A great place for your old people to end their lives. Moon Prince Uh-oh. Something else… Maybe you like one of the products advertised on this podcast. That’s really cool! Upload here or email the podcast at adreadpodcast at gmail.com with your testimonials. You can send these as either a written testimonial or an audio testimonial. Either way, we may include it on the show! That’s cool as fuck, and I’m the creator of this podcast so I would know. Another Thing? If you have a business you want to advertise on the podcast, you can also email us at adreadpodcast at gmail.com! We’d love to read your ad! (Additional writing for this podcast by Jon Robertson. Additional acting by Jon, Tatiana Maria, Sydney Durst, she who shall not be named and he who shall not be named nor linked.)

Welcome to the Ad Read podcast. We’re not like those other podcasts that fluff the running time with needless content. We get straight to the ad reads, bringing you, the consumer the product information you crave. No need to skip ahead, no filler, just poorly read ad copy from all the brands you love. Disclaimer: Any references to products/companies real or fake reflect our opinion alone and not the opinion of the companies in question. This is especially true of the fake companies, who can be real assholes about this sort of thing. Subscribe to Ad Read in these places: Apple | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn | SoundCloud | Google | Android Subscribe to the entire Bearded Gentlemen Feed: Apple | Android In today’s episode, we read the following ads: Real World Escapes A lot of people have been getting pretty sick of living in a simulation. So stop living in a simulation, already. Get out. Keep making your way up through all the levels of simulation and find the real world. Pool Crashers Get some money from that pool you never use. It’s right there, so why waste it? Get that money. Let people rent your pool. Moon Importance Foundation Is the moon important or not? Cat Food If you got pussy cats around your house that want a meal, check out this cat food. It’s for cats. Pet My Wiener Big fans of wiener dogs will probably get down with this website. Something else… Maybe you like one of the products advertised on this podcast. That’s really cool! Upload here or email the podcast at adreadpodcast at gmail.com with your testimonials. You can send these as either a written testimonial or an audio testimonial. Either way, we may include it on the show! That’s cool as fuck, and I’m the creator of this podcast so I would know. Another Thing? If you have a business you want to advertise on the podcast, you can also email us at adreadpodcast at gmail.com! We’d love to read your ad! (Additional writing for this podcast by Jon Robertson. Additional acting by Jon.)

Five Feet Under with Kendon Luscher is a podcast, which is pretty darn cool. What’s the nature of the podcast? I am glad you asked. I ask an artist, writer, musician, comedian and/or God-type five questions. That person answers the questions, and that’s the podcast. It’s short and fun and almost nobody gets hurt in the process. Subscribe here: Apple | Android | Spotify | Google Today’s guest is Branson Reese, who writes, makes comics and is the dungeon master of the uncommonly hilarious Dungeons and Dragons podcast “Rude Tales of Magic“. On today’s episode, I ask the following questions: * What’s the best emo/emo-skewing pop-punk albums for the worst day of your life, the best day of your life and the most average day of your life? * There’s been a scientific breakthrough! You can put your dog’s personality into any animal (and for the sake of this hypothetical, claws, teeth, etc will be filed down to the point where they couldn’t accidentally hurt you). What animal do you infuse with your dog’s personality, and why would this be the raddest choice? * Marvel, DC and Image Comics all come to you, hoping you’ll take over the writing/illustrating of one of their superhero series. They’re all offering you a ton of money, and you get to pick the entire direction without any interference. What superhero comic series do you take over? Give me the elevator pitch for the direction and style of this run. * A telephone rings from the kitchen. You follow the sound and find a phone that hadn’t been there before, but you pick it up because curiosity overtakes you. As soon as you say, “Hello?” a wormhole sucks you into a parallel universe that is nearly identical to your universe — there’s even another you there, living your exact same life. The wormhole dropped you right outside your residence with no shoes, phone, jacket or wallet, and on the other side of kitchen window, Other Branson fixes a sandwich.You know for a fact that you cannot go back to your own world because a scientist walks up to you and says, “Hey Branson. Cool device, huh? It’ll take me 70 years to make another so you can go back home. I hope you can hold tight until then.” You have 70 years to waste in this parallel universe. What’s your plan to survive? And what sandwich was Other Branson probably making? * Swan Boy just joined your D&D group. What is his character’s class, name, character alignment and general approach to the game? How fun or unfun would he be to play with in your party?

Five Feet Under with Kendon Luscher is a podcast, which is pretty darn cool. What’s the nature of the podcast? I am glad you asked. I ask an artist, writer, musician, comedian and/or God-type five questions. That person answers the questions, and that’s the podcast. It’s short and fun and almost nobody gets hurt in the process. Subscribe here: Apple | Android | Spotify | Google Today’s guest is David Young, who creates the audio comedic drama “Me, My Demon and I“. He’s an audio drama triple threat (producing, writing and acting). On today’s episode, I ask the following questions: * What audio fiction podcast have you enjoyed the most the past month or so? * You die in an especially horrific manner. That sucks, but thankfully a team of scientists upload your brain into a computer. Now they want to design a transformer body for you and stick your digital mind in that body. What is your hidden “non-robot” form and what faction in the transformer wars do you join? * You get to make a fiction podcast for any already existing videogame, movie, book, or TV IP with complete creative freedom. What IP do you choose to make, what’s the premise of the podcast and what does this do to expand (or purposefully destroy?) that IP’s universe? * You slip on your favorite sneakers, and they pinch your feet in the strangest, most uncomfortable places. As soon as you get used to the discomfort, the pinched spot moves. And all day, you find yourself walking to places you had no intention of visiting. When you try to take your shoes off at the end of the day, they bite you.This is when it occurs to you that, just maybe, a demon has possessed your shoes? It feeds on your suffering, but don’t worry, it can’t kill you because this is a symbiotic relationship here. What three places do your possessed shoes take you that would be the most torture? And what’s your one favorite place your shoes bring you so you can briefly experience pure joy as a reminder of what is good in the world, making the torture hit even harder? * You have to live the rest of your life as an NPC in a ruthlessly complex JRPG. What’s your NPC’s (brief) backstory, what side-quest do you give the hero of the game and what’s the reward for completing the quest?