The Baggage Reclaim Sessions

In this episode, Natalie talks about how to start building your self-esteem, why you shouldn’t get too hung up on your ex moving on before you or with someone you think is ‘better’, and why there’s no need to tell someone you don’t like them. This week’s listener question is about whether we have a right to feel heartbroken over a relationship that never happened, plus Natalie shares what she learned this week. 100 Days of Baggage Reclaim book: www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/100daysbook Articles on Baggage Reclaim related to ‘Why them and not me?’ When you’re afraid they’ll become a better person in a better relationship, without you http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/what-keeps-you-up-a-night-pondering-whether-theyre-a-better-person-in-a-better-relationship-without-you/ He’s with someone else – Why her and not me? http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/hes-with-someone-else-why-her-and-not-me/ ‘Why him/her and not me?’ Not everything is about us! http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/why-himher-and-not-me-not-everything-is-about-us/ Do you have a Replacement Mentality? http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/do-you-have-a-replacement-mentality/ The Replacement Mentality: But WHY did they go back to their toxic ex when they could have had me? http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/the-replacement-mentality-but-why-did-they-go-back-to-their-toxic-ex-when-they-could-have-had-me/ Don’t Be The Bridge Between Someone’s Old & New Relationship http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/dont-be-the-bridge-between-someones-old-new-relationship/ Return On Investment in Relationships http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/return-on-investment-in-relationships/ ‘I Can Change Him’ Syndrome/Fixer Uppers http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/i-can-change-himher-syndrome-dont-tie-your-worth-to-trying-to-control-the-uncontrollable/ Betting On Potential – Are You Gambling On a Relationship Capacity That Doesn’t Exist? http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/betting-on-potential-are-you-gambling-on-a-relationship-capacity-that-doesnt-exist/ Betting On Potential in Relationships http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/betting-on-potential-in-relationships/ Show notes at www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/48 Email podcast@baggagereclaim.com Facebook facebook.com/baggagereclaim Instagram instagram.com/natlue

In the latest episode of Why Did We Break Up?, Molly and Steven met in their late teens at the start of their careers and 14 years, 2 kids, marriage and a business that they had to declare bankruptcy on, Steven has announced that he needs some time out to be on his own and figure out who he is, only to rent himself an apartment and begin a series of flings followed by two girlfriends. Feeling rejected, replaced, and rather confused about what is going on, Natalie helps Molly see what is really going so that she can grab her freedom and build her life on her own terms. Articles mentioned in the show Overfunctioning and underfunctioning http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/are-you-doing-the-other-persons-job-in-your-relationships/ Overcompensating http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/admit-the-cover-up-stop-overcompensating/ Podcast episode about being over-responsible http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/33 Be notified about when The Breakthrough is open for enrollment www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/the-breakthrough Show notes for this episode at www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/47 Email podcast@baggagereclaim.com Facebook facebook.com/baggagereclaim Instagram instagram.com/natlue

In this episode, Natalie talks about finding making new friends daunting and shares tips for being more open to it, plus she shares 10 questions for discerning whether your partner is emotionally available, and shares a couple of comments from listeners about what they learned from holidaying on their own, something she talked about in episode 42. This week’s listener question is about how to broach the subject of taking things slowly with sex, and Natalie shares what she’s learned this week. You can download the, Is Your Partner Emotionally Available? questions at www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/46-download The episode about recognising your own availability is www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/28 Show notes at www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/46 Email podcast@baggagereclaim.com Facebook facebook.com/baggagereclaim Instagram instagram.com/natlue

In the latest episode of Why Did We Break Up?, Katie is still reeling after ending a 21-month affair with a married man who doesn’t seem to grasp why him not leaving his wife is a deal-breaker. Natalie helps Katie make the link between this affair, the breakdown of her marriage and earlier experiences in life so that she can use the pain of the fallout of this relationship as a vehicle for huge growth and healing. The blog post that Natalie refers to in the episode about being the favourite child or wanting to be influences our disposition to be involved in an affair http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/being-the-favourite-child-or-wanting-to-be-influences-our-disposition-to-involved-in-an-affair/ Also, the post on there’s no such thing as an honest cheat http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/theres-no-such-thing-as-an-honest-cheat-and-other-thoughts-on-cheating/ And another on why affairs are like being double-crossed in a heist http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/why-affairs-are-like-being-double-crossed-in-a-heist/ Full show notes www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/45

In this episode, Natalie talks about the unnecessary apologising and backtracking habit, how getting your stuff in order can help you to clear out mentally and emotionally, and the importance of feeling all your feelings. This week’s listener question is about what to do about somebody who hogs the conversation leaving you to be a ‘good listener’, plus Natalie shares what she learned this week. The picture of stuff that I bagged up from the corner of my dining room and the comments https://www.instagram.com/p/BJH-LQVB909/?taken-by=natlue Marie Kondo’s The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying http://amzn.to/2bR3TDl Quick videos on folding http://goop.com/the-illustrated-guide-to-the-kondo-mari-method/ Don't forget: If you're decluttering and tidying up like me, tag me on Instagram with your photos or share with me via Twitter or Facebook and I'll send you a More Ideas Than Time notebook. http://store.baggagereclaim.co.uk/product/more-ideas-than-time-notebook/ I have 20 ready to post! Email podcast@baggagereclaim.com Facebook facebook.com/baggagereclaim Instagram instagram.com/natlue Twitter twitter.com/baggagereclaim Show notes www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/44

It's the year 2000 and Steve and Danielle meet via mutual friends at a club in London. She's fresh out of a relationship with someone she calls "cold" and "emotionally abusive" and he feels as if he's over his ex who left him abruptly during a vulnerable time a few years back. He feels protective of and curious about this woman who he deems "out of his league". Sixteen years, two daughters and a marriage later and they're now divorced. Steve is taking the blame for why Danielle ended the relationship and has proceeded to date other men right under his nose. It's time to answer his question: Why Did We Break Up? Email podcast@baggagereclaim.com Facebook facebook.com/baggagereclaim Instagram instagram.com/natlue Twitter twitter.com/baggagereclaim Show notes www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/43

In this episode, Natalie talks about going on holiday/vacation on your own and shares stories and tips from her own adventure, plus she shares ten tips for conflict resolution when you’re in a relationship, and explains why it’s never the people who are actually bad at their job that have Imposter Syndrome. This week’s listener question is about how to break the cycle of casual relationships when you’re ready for something more serious, plus Natalie shares what she learned this week. From the conflict resolution segment: What’s the baggage behind it? www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/2 Get Out of Stuck Guide (for working on beliefs) http://store.baggagereclaim.co.uk/product/get-out-of-stuck-ebook-and-worksheet-pack/ Be notified about when The Breakthrough is open for enrollment http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/the-breakthrough Email podcast@baggagereclaim.com Facebook facebook.com/baggagereclaim Instagram instagram.com/natlue Twitter twitter.com/baggagereclaim Show notes www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/42

In this special edition of the show, which also marks the one-year anniversary, Natalie introduces the new offshoot, Why Did We Break Up?, where she explores one breakup in depth and answers the question of why they broke up. This episode features Yasmine and Russell, two thirty-somethings who 'met' online and arranged to meet up really quickly, only for her to be very turned off by what she saw. Despite her awkwardness and making her excuses, she agreed to keep their arrangement to meet up the following day as she felt a mix of pity and curiosity. Two months of 'friendly' meetups and they slept together, and BOOM, it was the beginning of the end. The Instagram of me recording in the closet: https://instagram.com/p/BJSXemDhNfA/ Show notes: www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/41

In this episode, Natalie talks about why a relationship needs to have purpose and direction if you want it to grow (or for you to feel happy), how to deal with narcissistic co-workers, family and partners, and the importance of redirecting the energy that you use to make you unworthy. This week's listener question is about what to do when you disapprove of your friend's choice in partner and their impending hasty wedding plans and Natalie shared what she learned this week about dimming her light. http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/narcissists http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/unpleasables http://psychcentral.com/disorders/narcissistic-personality-disorder-symptoms/ http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/5 http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/2 http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/are-you-inadvertently-dimming-your-light-when-you-have-a-pattern-of-being-afraid-of-outshining/ Show notes for this episode: http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/40

In this episode, Natalie talks about resistance to taking time off and fear of using holiday allowance, trying to make every relationship fly by being in love or seeing a future with every date and partner, and why we shouldn’t get too carried away by ‘graduation goggles’. This week’s listener question is about distinguishing between ego and boundaries and Natalie shares what she learned this week about managing expectations. What’s the baggage behind it? is at www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/2 Full show notes for this episode at www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/39 All podcasts are listed at www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/podcast

Natalie shares some of the themes of her 38th year, talks about why being self-critical creates a vicious cycle where you end up being around people that validate and increase negative feelings, and why setting a time to worry can break a worry habit. This week's listener question is about whether to confront a friend that seems to be pulling back and Natalie shares what she learned this week. The 8 types of inner critic www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/20 Full show notes at www.baggagereclaim.uk/38 Your support matters and I would love it if you could leave a review of the show on iTunes. It can be tricky to figure out how to do this so here's a few quick steps to help you do it. Open the podcast app on your iPhone or iPad. Tap the search button on the bottom right and type 'baggage reclaim' into the search bar, click on the artwork for the show which should then show the episodes, reviews and related tab. Click on reviews and then click on 'write a review' and shazam, all done. Thank you!

This week, Natalie explains why being too passive can send the wrong message in a relationship, shares 5 questions to help you figure out your values, and talks about why passive-aggressive gifts really are not a gift at all. This week’s listener question is about how to overcome feelings of jealousy and revenge and Natalie shares what she learned from facing down the big challenge of driving on the motorway. Curbing Your Obsession guide - http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/my-books/curbing-your-obsession-quick-guide-pdf-epub/ Full show notes: www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/37

This week, Natalie explains why decluttering exes and dates from your phone makes good relationship and emotional business, talks about the problem with family secrets, and revisits "You complete me". This week's listener question is about plus-one etiquette and Natalie shares what she's learned this week. The Huff Post piece by Jennifer Aniston http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/for-the-record_us_57855586e4b03fc3ee4e626f? My post on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/baggagereclaim/posts/10154221634428950 Episode 2 where I talked about "You complete me" http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/2 Show notes: www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/36

In this episode, Natalie talks about pretending to like something when we don't as a means of fitting in or to come across as more appealing to a potential mate. She also explains the 7 types of tricky family and why she's been getting a bit twitchy about turning 39 in a few weeks. Episode 25 about birthdays is : http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/25 My cousin's B&B http://www.therunawayjamaica.com/ Soulful PR https://janetmurray.co.uk/ That time when I got very stressy at conference http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/lessons-from-a-short-lived-comparison-binge/ and the keynote that resulted https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LdKIUrAi9ao Full show notes http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/35

In this episode, Natalie follows up ep. 33 (www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/33) where she talked about personality and character not being the same by exploring one of the subjects within this--why someone being charming as their dominant trait can pose certain types of problem. In the second segment, she explains the importance of identifying your money story if you find that you get triggered about money or are experiencing a recurring theme.You can grab the Unsent Letter Guide at www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/downloads In the third segment, she explains why even when someone can do something, it doesn't mean that they have to. This week's listener question is about what to do when you're single and your loved ones keep prying into your love life. LINKS MENTIONED IN THE SHOW We Need To Talk About Narcissists: 20 Mindset Shifts To Help You Stop Crazy-Making Yourself www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/narcissists Advice Wednesday #7: My Ex Became More Controlling When I Stopped Earning. Is Financial Equity Critical To Relationship Success? www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/aw7 Full show notes: www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/34