Date Smarter, Not Harder!

It seems the majority of females are totally willing to settle for a man that is less - less ambitious, less religious, less intelligent, less physically attractive, less giving. Why do we so often see women who have it all settling for any piece of a man due to the belief that ANY man is better than no man at all? Why do women buy into this way of thinking? When does compromise become settling? Join me as we discuss some of the many reasons women settle for less in relationships and stay with men that are not treating them well.

There is a contingent of Black men online and in print media that love to quote the statistic: "70% of Black women are single!" This statement is shouted and repeated with the utmost excitement and conviction. It is usually followed by suggestions (aka demands) that Black women change what they are doing and how they are doing it, how they dress, speak, and what they need to be like in order to remove themselves from this pool of faceless lonely and desperate women, hungering for a husband. To read Deborrah Cooper's article on this subject, click here: 70% of Black Women Are Single? Don't Believe The Hype!

We've all kissed frogs and stood around waiting for him or her to turn into Royalty. Why don't more singles recognize when the person they are dating is a real loser and not worth the time or energy they've put into building a relationship? Tonight we'll discuss the warning signs you now know (from life experience and getting your head bumped) indicate that someone isn't really the right guy or gal for you. Sandra L. Brown, M.A. (CEO of The Institute for Relational Harm Reduction & Public Pathology Education) is a psychopathologist and award-winning author. Her books include How to Spot a Dangerous Man book and workbook, and Women Who Love Psychopaths: Inside the Relationships of Inevitable Harm with Narcissists, Sociopaths and Psychopaths. Dr. LeslieBeth Wish Ed. D. MSS (LoveVictory.Com) also joins me to discuss the behaviors and attitudes singles should be watching for to know they are dating a loser vs. a winner! Participate in the discussion by calling 347-327-9215.

Why do some women choose bad boys over and over and never learn to move past them? What is it about "good guys" that makes women yawn? Is it true that the "good guys" really have the same motivations as the "bad boys," they're just sneaky, manipulative and underhanded about how they go about getting it? Our guests tonight are actress and motivational speaker A.J. Johnson and Dr. Carole Lieberman M.D., M.P.H. When AJ is not sharing the screen with Julia Roberts, Ving Rhames or Sylvester Stallone, she is one of the most world renowned lifestyle coaches and wellness advocates around. A.J. was a Psychology/Chemistry major at Spellman College in Atlanta and graduated Magna cum Laude in Psychology. Dr. Carole Lieberman is the author of "Bad Boys: Why we love them, How to live with them and When to leave them." Dr. Lieberman makes frequent appearances on Fox News, CNN, BBC, "The Today Show", "Good Morning America", "Entertainment Tonight" and many more top shows. Please join in this interesting discussion with two powerful women by calling 347-327-9215. Read Deborrah's article: "Why Women Are Attracted to Bad Boys, Thugs and Players".

An interesting flip on the thought that men should always be in control and running things! In this lifestyle choice, the female is the dominating partner that rules the male with a no-nonsense expectation of adherence to her demands. Our guests include Melissa Febos, author of a soon to be published book entitled "Whip Smart!" Elihu, a male submissive, and I.G. Frederick, author of "Dommemoir." We'll discuss the mental and emotional needs men and women have which are met by this lifestyle choice. Join me and my panel of guests as we take a look at a subculture which embraces total female rule and domination over males. Call into the show at 347-327-9215.

Verbal abuse is seen in casual (new) dating situations amongst both adults AND TEENS with shocking frequency. From name calling and put downs to physical assaults, women stay in relationships with men that they apparently love more than they love themselves. Tonight we'll discuss the frequency which women return to abusers, the high tolerance women have for verbal abuse, types of injuries suffered, what women feel about their abuse/abusers, and provide solutions for healing. Our guests include Patricia Evans, author of the best-seller The Verbally Abusive Relationship and the recently released The Verbally Abusive Man, Can He Change?, and Robin Sax, a former Los Angeles County Prosecutor who specialized in felony cases including sex crimes, domestic violence, and stalking. Together they'll address the insidious nature of verbal, emotional and psychological abuse and answer the question: is verbal abuse a kind of violence? Read Recognizing Verbal Abuse. Call into the show at 347-327-9215

What is the mentality of an individual that chooses to murder an estranged partner, then commit suicide? This type of violence, primarily directed towards females, has also included coworkers and family members of the intended target, as well as the couple's own children. Though many are married and going through a divorce, murder/suicides are common amongst singles as well. Dr. Katherine van Wormer, author of "Death by Domestic Violence: Preventing the Murders and Murder-Suicides" joins us to discuss this disturbing aspect of dating gone very, very wrong. The call in number is 347-327-9215.

Hidden messages and masked communication uncovered. Communicating openly and honestly is high risk. Few people are willing to put themselves and their feelings on the line, so they hide and hint and pretend to think and feel things that they really don't. If you are frequently confused by what the opposite sex says and want some clarity, this is the show for you! Call in with your confusing statements and get help from the host and other callers. Dial 347-327-9215

How about we create a resume to give to new dating partners that lists our best skills, our experience at the "job", our training, education and background? How many times have you been "written up" or fired? Why would anyone want to "hire" you for their mate? What are your "salary" requirements? If you had a relationship resume, what would be on it? The call-in number is 347-327-9215. Join me to discuss the qualifications you THINK you have for the job as boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife. Special thanks to Susan Ireland for suggested dating/relationship "interview" questions ideas!

Is it a good idea to remain friends with ex-partners? What is the motivation behind hanging on to a "friendship" with someone you can't stand or who can't stand you? Are you the type that wants to keep tabs on your exes, or do you prefer to sever all ties and move on? What would you base your decision on when trying to decide if you should be friends with an ex or not?

An article which appeared in Jet Magazine proclaimed that 57% of single White men are open to interracial dating, compared to 51% of single Black women. Almost half the Black female population over the age of 18 in the U.S. is single. We'll explore the nuances of love between races, what Black women need that they aren't getting from Black men, and the fears and stereotypes which may be preventing Black women from opening their arms and hearts to White men. Does love really have a color? Cheryl Y. Judice, Ph.D., is a sociologist and professor of African American Studies at Northwestern University and the author of the only scholarly treatise on black females with White men entitled Interracial Relationships - Black Women and White Men. Karyn Folan is the author of a soon to be released book on the same subject entitled "Don't Bring Home A White Boy and other Notions that Keep Black Women From Dating Out." Karyn feels that "Black women aren't doing anything 'wrong' as far as dating goes... but the math is against us if we're only looking at black men. We outnumber them in some major cities at a ratio which some experts say could be as high as 10:1. That means we have two choices: look beyond race for romantic partners or remain single." Cicely J. is the author of the soon to be released book Black Men vs. White Men – The Black Woman's Choice. Cicely feels that more and more Black women are falling for their Mr. Right in the form of blonde hair and blue eyes because Darnell, DaQuan, and Tyrone are not equipped to meet her halfway. Join me and my guests as we discuss the pros, cons and controversy associated with interracial relationships between White men and Black women!

We spend a great portion of our day on our jobs, and many singles have found true love at their place of employment. Though many corporations even have written policies against office romances, most don't care. But what do you do if the love is one-sided? When does an honest expression of interest turn into sexual harassment or stalking? Some people don't take rejection well, and a breakup that has to be handled at the workplace is likely to cause problems for one or both parties. Is it smart to seek love at work or is this something we should avoid at all cost? Joining me to discuss workplace romance and civility in the face of rejection is Clinical Social Worker and Asst. Prof. Daniel L. Buccino, Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences at Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine in Maryland.

Why do women have such a hard time moving on from a man and a relationship that they KNOW is no good for them? Women will tend to hang on and on, trying in vain to stir the heart of a man that is not interested in them "like that." Women will also waste a lot of time and energy trying to change a loser into the dynamic man they imagine he can be. Women give their beloved men chance after chance, enduring lying and mistreatment time after time. Why do women continue to love and stay with men in spite of the fact that he isn't the one and ain't trying to be? Why wouldn't these women prefer being single to being miserable in a relationship? Is it really true that having ANYONE is better than having no one at all?

Why do single men think that marrying them should be the goal of every woman in the world? Do single women still feel the need to behave in ways that meet the standards and expectations of men? With women filing 65% of the divorces in the U.S., does it make sense to believe that marriage is still a necessity for women, or has it become a rather distasteful option? Husband and wife team Laura and Jay Laffoon are the authors of "The Spark-Igniting Passion, Mystery and Romance in your Marriage and the soon to be released book "He Said She Said - Eight Powerful Phrases That Will Strengthen Your Marriage." The book discusses four phrases every woman needs to hear from her man and four phrases every man needs to hear from his wife. We'll look at the purpose for marriage, modern marriages and men's perspectives and needs in a wife and if those needs are or are not being met by modern American women, as well as how marriage may not be meeting the needs of the modern American woman. Please join us!

Even though men and women are both speaking English, rarely do they fully understand each other. Making assumptions, jumping to conclusions, finger pointing and blaming, excuse making, shutting down and running away all lead to poor communication and hurt feelings. Joining me to find ways to improve communication between the sexes is John Wilder, author of the soon-to-be-released book SECRETS TO ACHIEVING HAPPILY EVER AFTER AND IMPROVING YOUR LOVE LIFE TOO! and Michael of Michael's Quick Help. Michael has been helping people see the nuances of behavior and how that behavior as well as what's said and what's not said (the details) paint a clear picture of what's REALLY transpiring between two people. Join us for what's sure to be an interesting discussion on gender and differences in communication.