Eyres on the Road

This week the Eyres discuss their seventh book, called Lifeplanning and candidly admit that they are not happy with everything they wrote in that book. They worry that it suggests that we have more control of our lives than we really do, and wish that they had written more about how important it is to be flexible and to adjust our goals and plans as unexpected opportunities or problems enter our lives. But the core idea of goal-setting and planning is sound, and we need to have "Relationship Goals" for our marriages and our parenting as well as "Achievement Goals" for our work and careers. How well we set these goals, how frequently we review and adjust them, how prayerful and guided we are, and how diligently we work on them can determine our happiness as well as our destiny.

This week the Eyres talk about the goods and evils of the internet and suggest ways that parents and marriage partners can use and consume social media sources that strengthen families. They also announce the Annual Family.Is Internet Awards which will recognize and award family-friendly content on blogs, Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, Podcasts and websites. Content will be judged on how well it Celebrates Commitment, Popularizes Parenting, Validates Values, and Bolsters Balance. The awards ceremony will be in February of 2020 and you can now nominate your favorite pro-family social media or internet source now by commenting on Instagram @richardlindaeyre.

A preschooler's absorbent mind can learn just about anything, so the question is, what to teach them. Many parents opt for early academics, but studies show that this may make them bored when they start school, and that other kids will catch up by age 7 or 8. A better option is to let kids have a real childhood, free from the school pressure that will come soon enough. The thing to focus on with preschoolers is the emotional and social skills or "joys" that will make them happy people. On today's show, the Eyres talk about their 8th book, Teaching Children Joy, and how it came to be written and how it started Joy Schools, a do-it-yourself preschool that has now been practiced by more than 300,000 families.

Perhaps the single most important (and influential) thing we can do for our children is to teach them to know Jesus Christ. Nothing else will prepare them as well to make good decisions and to live to their potential than a clear vision of who Christ was and is. It was these thoughts that motivated the Eyres to write their sixth book, which asks its readers to focus on one single, specific aspect or facet of Jesus's character each week of the year, particularly on each Sunday. The Eyres wrote this book while they had the stewardship of 600 young missionaries in London, England in the hopes that those young people, along with their own children, would become interested in knowing as much as they possibly could about Christ and His life and ministry and about "what manner of man" He was and is.

How we talk about (and how we think about) death can have a significant impact on our children. Clearly it is easier for people of faith and belief in a hereafter to think positively about death, but with the right mindset, we all can think of death more as a kind of birth and bring a comforting long-range perspective into our families' lives. Today the Eyres talk about the fifth book they wrote, titled, The Birth that We Call Death and they share some of the wisdom and insight of great thinkers from Shakespeare to Nathaniel Hawthorne to Benjamin Franklin on this subject that applies to us all and to our families.

Today the Eyres talk about the subject of goal setting from a family and parenting perspective. Referencing a book they wrote called simply GOALS, they discuss the charting of a life course and the setting of corresponding plans via the sailing analogy of knowing your destination and then setting and trimming the sails in a way that will get you there. Of course it is the wind that propels the sailboat, and it is work that propels us toward our goals. And relationship goals are even more important than achievement goals. At this time of year, as a new school year begins, there are special opportunities to help our children set academic, extracurricular, and character goals. You can get an online copy of the book GOALS for free at EyresFreeBooks.com.

The third book the Eyres ever wrote was called The Discovery of Joy and it set the tone and the theme for much of their subsequent writing. In today's show, Richard and Linda tell the story behind that book and present the case that the pursuit of the deepest joys can become the foundation of family life and the key to lasting marriages and successful kids.

This week the Eyres continue their series on the core message of each of their 50 published books on family, parenting, marriage, and life balance. This is the second week in the series, and the focus is on their second book, titled RELATIONSHIPS, With Self, With Family, and With God. The prime message of the book is that relationships are more important than achievements and deserve an equal or greater amount of time and mental energy. While achievement goals are often set with numbers and percentages and quantitative measurement, relationship goals are set with descriptive paragraphs about what you want a particular relationship (with spouse, or a child, or with God) to be like in five years. Those who deliberately change their priorities from achievements to relationships will find ways to improve the one thing that, late in life, everyone wishes they had spent more time and effort on--the key RELATIONSHIPS of their life. If, after listening to this podcast, you find yourself interested in the concepts of this book, you can get it for free on EyresFreeBooks.com.

This week's show begins a series by the Eyres on the main concepts from their 50 published books, all of which take aim at strengthening families. The books covered in this series are free at EyresFreeBooks.com. Each week during this series, Richard and Linda will summarize the main thrust of one their publications, summarizing the points it makes about parenting, marriage and life-balance. 50 is a big number for the Eyres this year, as a new grandson became the 50th member of their family and as they celebrate their 50th anniversary this month. The first of Linda and Richard Eyre's 50 books was published in 1972 while Richard was a graduate student at Harvard, and was co-authored with Paul H. Dunn. It went through dozens of printings and sold in the hundreds of thousands. It has two front covers, one titled I Challenge You and the other titled I Promise You. A reader can start from the challenge side and read one of the 21 challenges, and then flip the book over to read the corresponding promise that follows the challenge. Sample challenges: To write your diary in advance, to be gentle with yourself, to forge a joyful family. From the promise side, one can read the promise desired, and then flip the book over to read the challenge that leads to that promise. Sample promises: That you will have a secret smiling of the heart, that you will learn to like yourself, that you will see more clearly the right forks in your life's road.  

FAMILY REUNIONS.... What are they really? Just a time to get together and grill up some food and have a good time? Or are they something more than that? Can they be the glue that holds families together and that makes cousins more than friends? The Eyres share their family reunion experiences and how it has strengthened their family bonds.

If we look at statistics, the prospects of marriage in today's world look pretty bleak. Divorce rates are high, and marriage rates continue to drop while the numbers for cohabitation without marriage continue to rise. But as the Eyres travel the world, they see a counter trend that is much more positive. There has never been a better time to forge a great marriage!

Equality in marriage can sound like a good goal to start with, but can sometimes lead to score-keeping in the house. Relationships are about striving for the same goal together with one purpose where two people can contribute different things. Today the Eyres share how they've been able to complete each other, not compete, in their marriage over the years.

Today the Eyres, broadcasting from London, England, talk about myth #6 from their "8 Myths of Marriaging." Today's myth, known as the "Test Drive Myth", is particularly troublesome because it is based on the false belief that living together for a while before marrying will ultimately make your marriage better and more lasting. The opposite is true. Commitment is necessary in every relationship especially in a marriage and can help you in overcome the hard times that come.  

Richard and Linda take a little break from their eight myths of marriage and instead talk whats been on their mind during a trip to Moscow, Russia. Parenting here in Russia is a lot different than most of us are used to. Most families have only one child and instead of entitled children like one would expect, we are seeing entitled parents and grandparents that are thriving off their child's success. Learn how Russian families support one another through their hard work and dedication!

If you believe that 'some things are better left unsaid' then you are dooming yourself to a relationship where 'unexpressed feelings will fester.' Richard and Linda are tackling two myths in one today both relating to making waves in a marriage. The important thing to remember is that there is a right and wrong kind of communication, and most relationships can use more (not less) of that good talking.