Porn Free Radio

The nagging question after any relapse is ‘Why?” Why did I look at porn when I was committed not to? Why did I look at porn even though it’s harmful to my relationship? Why did I look at porn and put my job at risk? There are two reasons that drive us to porn and they have little to do with brain science or our capacity for lust. Special Announcement: Hope Ray (from Episode 70) returns Monday, June 6th to answer your questions about recovery and relationships. Email matt@pornfreeradio.com to ask a question.  Sprint Coaching Summer Special * 1-on-1 Coaching With Matt Thanks for all your ratings and reviews in iTunes. If you haven’t had a chance yet please subscribe in iTunes and leave a rating or review because that helps get the word out.

It’s been 2 years of Pornfree Radio and this show is unlike any other. On this episode we focus on partners. We discuss disclosures, coming clean, check-ins, and the partners’ experience. Counselor Hope Ray joins Matt for an informative discussion that will help both motivated guys who want to quit looking at porn and the partners who love them. In this episode: * What and when to tell your wife * The disclosure process * What staggered disclosure is and why it’s damaging * F.A.S.T.T. Check-ins Hope Ray returns Monday, June 6th to answer your questions about recovery and relationships. Email matt@pornfreeradio.com to ask a question.  Resources: * Hope Ray Therapy * Stop Sex Addiction: Real Hope, True Freedom for Sex Addicts and Partners by Milton S Magness (Amazon link) Sprint Coaching * 1-on-1 Coaching With Matt Thanks for all your ratings and reviews in iTunes. If you haven’t had a chance yet please subscribe in iTunes and leave a rating or review because that helps get the word out.  

Opening the mail bag once again this week with a stack of questions. In this episode: “Is sex in recovery okay?” “What about hard mode?” “What about sex when your older?” “What happens when you and your partner have a different sex drive?” “What if you’re addicted to images that aren’t traditional pornography?” Resources: * Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction Patrick J. Carnes Ph.D. (affiliate link) * Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction Mark Laaser (affiliate link) * Should Married Couples Fast from Sex During Porn-Detox? Luke Gilkerson, Covenant Eyes * Porn Addiction Is Not Sex Addiction, and Why That’s Important, Gary Wilson and Marina Robinson (article) Sprint Coaching * 1-on-1 Coaching With Matt Thanks for all your ratings and reviews in iTunes. If you haven’t had a chance yet please subscribe in iTunes and leave a rating or review because that helps get the word out.

On this episode, Matt digs into the PFR mailbag and answers some questions listeners want to know. “We don’t think our way to right action, we act our way to right thinking.” – AA Recovery Quote Questions: “Are you still doing the podcast?” “How long does it take to quit porn?” “What worse to relapse in porn or masturbation?” “Can you recover if you have not hit rock bottom?” “Where can you look for an accountability partner?” Resources: * 1-on-1 Coaching With Matt Thanks for all your ratings and reviews in iTunes. If you haven’t had a chance yet please subscribe in iTunes and leave a rating or review because that helps get the word out.    

Sometimes we discover that we just plain want to hang on porn. We want to be passive and put the responsibility of moving forward on someone else. But it’s time to make a decision. In Episode 66, I asked the question, “Do you really want to fix this?” This episode struck a nerve with the audience. I received more email then I ever have before. Some guys were worried I was quitting podcasting. Several guys thought my sharp comments were directed at them. And many more shared the action they were taking as a result from this show. So I thought I would go deeper into what set me off. It’s the passive will and a failure to take responsibility. In this episode, you’ll learn: * The quote that almost got me in a fight * What we discover about our struggle * What the passive will is * About the decision we must make * What it means to decide “Sometimes we discover that we just plain want to hang on to the sinful behavior, and some of us even have to face the fact that we then hope to blame God for not “healing” us. We see right away when we are dealing with a passive will, someone who looks lumpishly to a counselor or minister of God to do what only he himself can do. All such things as these come to the fore, along with the memories of where the heart opened itself to envy, bitterness, lust and so on. Then in full confession of our sins of God, we acknowledge our rank foolishness and our propensities to pride and rebellion, and we make a decision about sin.” – Leanne Payne, The Healing Presence Resources: * 1-on-1 Coaching With Matt * The Healing Presence by Leanne Payne * Day Job to Dream Job by Kary Oberbrunner Thanks for all your ratings and reviews in iTunes. If you haven’t had a chance yet please subscribe in iTunes and leave a rating or review because that helps get the word out.  

This episode resets the vision of Pornfree Radio. If you are new listener feel free to listen to some old shows. If you’re a long timer, it’s time to have an honest conversation:  Do you want to fix this? Do you really want to fix this? Resources: * 1-on-1 Coaching With Matt Thanks for all your ratings and reviews in iTunes. If you haven’t had a chance yet please subscribe in iTunes and leave a rating or review because that helps get the word out.  

This is the final episode in a 3 podcast series about porn use in the workplace. We’ve identified in episode 63 the risks of using porn at work.  In episode 64, we talked about how your leadership is compromised. In part 3, Ben from the Brick House Web Series, joins me to discuss strategies for eliminating porn at work and getting things done. To listen to parts 1 and 2 go to: * 063 Not Safe For Work Pt 1: Risky Business * 064 Not Safe For Work Pt 2: The Impotent Leader If you don’t pay appropriate attention to what has your attention, it will take more of your attention than it deserves. – David Allen, Getting Things Done In this episode, you’ll learn: * What GTD is * Why you need to treat your work environment as a project * Why you need a plan for work * What are the unique emotional triggers, mistaken beliefs, and weak links at work * How to take action at work * Why we need self care at work Resources: * Brick House Web Series * 1-on-1 Coaching With Matt * Getting Things Done, David Allen (Amazon link) * Never Eat Alone, Keith Ferrazzi  (Amazon link) Software Resources: * K-9 Web Protection * Accountable2You (Affiliate Link) * Covenant Eyes  (Affiliate Link) Thanks for all your ratings and reviews in iTunes. If you haven’t had a chance yet please subscribe in iTunes and leave a rating or review because that helps get the word out.

This is part 2 of 3 episodes on porn use and the work place. Ben Fraser from the Brick House Web Series joins me again. This time we discuss the effect of porn use on your leadership at work. To listen to part 1 go to, 063 Not Safe For Work Pt 1: Risky Business. In this episode, you’ll learn: * How porn steals your focus * How it robs your ability to present to others * How it zaps your vision and erodes your confidence * How it compromises your moral leadership * Why even if people don’t find out, they will experience the effects Resources: * Brick House Web Series * 1-on-1 Coaching With Matt Thanks for all your ratings and reviews in iTunes. If you haven’t had a chance yet please subscribe in iTunes and leave a rating or review because that helps get the word out.

According to a survey* conducted by the Barna Group in the U.S. in 2014: 63% of adult men have looked at pornography at least one time while at work in the past 3 months; 38% have done so more than once. It’s a BIG issue. And there are HUGE risks to viewing porn at work. Ben Fraser from the Brick House Web Series joins me for 1st of 3 podcasts on porn use at work.  *2014 ProvenMen.org Pornography Use at Work Survey (conducted by the Barna Group) In this episode, you’ll learn: * You personal risk of using porn at work * The jaw dropping stats of porn at work * What triggers work place porn use * The 4 main areas of risk * The harm of “working under the influence” * Why porn steals more than just your time Resources: * Brick House Web Series * 1-on-1 Coaching With Matt Thanks for all your ratings and reviews in iTunes. If you haven’t had a chance yet please subscribe in iTunes and leave a rating or review because that helps get the word out.

Matt is joined by Brick House web series creator, Ben Fraser. Ben first visited Pornfree Radio for episode 24 on Creativity and Recovery. In this episode, Matt and Ben discuss the second season of Brick House (now available on YouTube.) Then they turn their attention to a passionate letter from a listener. Resources: * Brick House Web Series * Brick House Podcast * Sermon on the Mount Reference (Matthew 5:27-30, ESV) Sprint Coaching for Porn Addiction Are you getting stuck? I want to help you. I have openings starting this month. Sprint coaching is the fastest way to get a recovery plan in place and start taking action. Fill out an application here and I’ll set up a free 30-min session to see if sprint coaching is right for you. Thanks for all your ratings and reviews in iTunes. If you haven’t had a chance yet please subscribe in iTunes and leave a rating or review because that helps get the word out.

Saying goodbye to your stash is hard to do. It’s been with you a long time. It’s like a security blanket. But it is something that has to be done if you want freedom. In this episode, we talk about the strength to delete it all. We also discuss the things to watch out for when you get close to 30 days porn free. You’ll learn: * About my second chance offers for 2016 * The details of a listener success story * What it took to finally delete that old stash * 4 things to watch out for when your near the 30-day porn free mark 2016 Second Chance Offers Get access to Your Porn Free Playbook or 1-1 Coaching with Matt Dobschuetz at a great rate through February 5, 2016. Save $100 off Your Porn Free Playbook Course OR $300 off a 3-month coaching package. Click here to take action. Thanks for all your ratings and reviews in iTunes. If you haven’t had a chance yet please subscribe in iTunes and leave a rating or review because that helps get the word out.

In this episode, recorded on my 5th anniversary of being 100% porn free. I share the 5 biggest things that have helped me stay porn free since January 2011. In this episode you’ll learn: * About my last relapse * Why I need consistent, transparent relationships with other guys * Why open communication and trust with my wife was key to my success * Why I eliminated dangerous media in my life * How I took a hard line on edging * How helping others helps keep me porn free Your Porn Free Playbook (link) Join our new course and 2016 can be the year you go 100% porn free. I want to help. I want to work with you, because having another person walk through this with you is the only way to ditch this addiction. Finally, A Practical, Actionable Process for Quitting Porn * Build a rock solid plan that is custom to you * Find the missing pieces that keep you from freedom * Identify hidden triggers and roadblocks * Celebrate your successes (there will be success) * Discover the confidence and contentment that comes in recovery * Integrate freedom habits that add fun and fulfillment to your life Learn More Work With Me 1-on-1 Are you getting stuck? I want to help you. I have openings starting this month. Sprint coaching is the fastest way to get a recovery plan in place and start taking action. Fill out an application here and I’ll set up a free 30-min session to see if sprint coaching is right for you. Thanks for all your ratings and reviews in iTunes. If you haven’t had a chance yet please subscribe in iTunes and leave a rating or review because that helps get the word out.

Continuing our discussion on relapse from episode 58, in this show we talk about the lies we believe and how to prevent relapse. Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better. – Samuel Beckett In this episode you’ll learn: * Matt’s favorite character from Star Wars: The Force Awakens * Common lies we believe when in relapse * Warning signs of relapse * How to avoid relapse * Why bringing even small things into the light helps us * Listener Question: What do you do when you’re trying to sleep and lustful thoughts keep pounding your mind? Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them. For it is shameful even to speak of the things that they do in secret. But when anything is exposed by the light, it becomes visible, for anything that becomes visible is light. – Ephesians 5:11-14 (ESV) Resource: http://emergency.nofap.com/ Want to Help Me? I am thinking about designing a relapse tool. A short guide or a email series and I need a few guys to review and answer some questions. Let me know if you would be interested. Go to: http://recoveredman.com/relapse Your Porn Free Playbook (link) Join our new course and 2016 can be the year you go 100% porn free. I want to help. I want to work with you, because having another person walk through this with you is the only way to ditch this addiction. Finally, A Practical, Actionable Process for Quitting Porn * Build a rock solid plan that is custom to you * Find the missing pieces that keep you from freedom * Identify hidden triggers and roadblocks * Celebrate your successes (there will be success) * Discover the confidence and contentment that comes in recovery * Integrate freedom habits that add fun and fulfillment to your life Learn More Work With Me 1-on-1 Are you getting stuck? I want to help you. I have openings starting this month. Sprint coaching is the fastest way to get a recovery plan in place and start taking action. Fill out an application here and I’ll set up a free 30-min session to see if sprint coaching is right for you. Thanks for all your ratings and reviews in iTunes. If you haven’t had a chance yet please subscribe in iTunes and leave a rating or review because that helps get the word out.

I get a ton of email about relapse. Immediately after a relapse guys send me questions trying to figure out what went wrong. Or sometimes they are trying to figure out what series of behaviors constitutes relapse. All that and more as we spend the 1st of 2 episodes on relapse. In this episode you’ll learn: * What relapse means * When it begins and more importantly when it ends * How we can take ownership * How to assess what happened * Why relapse can be a gift Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better. – Samuel Beckett Want to Help Me? I am thinking about designing a relapse tool. A short guide or a email series and I need a few guys to review and answer some questions. Let me know if you would be interested. Go to: http://recoveredman.com/relapse Your Porn Free Playbook (link) Join our new course and 2016 can be the year you go 100% porn free. I want to help. I want to work with you, because having another person walk through this with you is the only way to ditch this addiction. Finally, A Practical, Actionable Process for Quitting Porn * Build a rock solid plan that is custom to you * Find the missing pieces that keep you from freedom * Identify hidden triggers and roadblocks * Celebrate your successes (there will be success) * Discover the confidence and contentment that comes in recovery * Integrate freedom habits that add fun and fulfillment to your life Learn More   Thanks for all your ratings and reviews in iTunes. If you haven’t had a chance yet please subscribe in iTunes and leave a rating or review because that helps get the word out.

There is a part of you that doesn’t want to listen to this podcast. Because to go porn free in 2016 you might have to do some things differently than this year. But you need to press through the resistance and embrace the process. In this episode, we discuss the 5 steps to going porn free in 2016. In this episode you’ll learn: * What a sprint plan is * Why you need to be selfish * The 3 roadblocks to being porn free * The biggest mistake people make when quitting porn * The new habits you need this year * What activates your plan Go Porn Free in 2016 Video Training Free Video, checklist, and monthly worksheet download. Click Here We value your privacy. Your email will never be shared. Emails are sent from matt@recoveredman.com. Your Porn Free Playbook (link) Join our new course and 2016 can be the year you go 100% porn free. I want to help. I want to work with you, because having another person walk through this with you is the only way to ditch this addiction. Finally, A Practical, Actionable Process for Quitting Porn * Build a rock solid plan that is custom to you * Find the missing pieces that keep you from freedom * Identify hidden triggers and roadblocks * Celebrate your successes (there will be success) * Discover the confidence and contentment that comes in recovery * Integrate freedom habits that add fun and fulfillment to your life Learn More   Thanks for all your ratings and reviews in iTunes. If you haven’t had a chance yet please subscribe in iTunes and leave a rating or review because that helps get the word out.