Don Woods

Hi Vince....I have attached the song for the end chat about the Finland gig......it is "The Story of Skiffle" by "Skiffle" John Lomax..which I wrote and produced for him.....this is the version which got us the gig...... 1.The train strikes and the one sided biassed reporting 2.In parts of Spain it is now illegal to pee in the sea..... enforcement should be interesting. 3.Complaints about Facebook accepting "upskirting" 4.Idiots who do and say stupid things are not the problem... the problem is the media for giving them publicity....obviously REAL problems are not news. 5.The Glastonbury Festival is getting full coverage which I have managed to avoid.....modern music has lost its way. 6.Strange things which happened on a gig I once did in Finland.....which includes this week's song selection "The Story of Skiffle"

Heatwave Alert for The Wirral Peninsula with Don's Song The two day heatwave has put us all on full alert with instructions as to how to handle it and the fear of draughts or floods....not forgetting how to apply suncream.....yep our few days of Summer has arrived......... all carried out from the new £5 million pound BBC studio. England cricketers have restored my interest in the game...whereas the footballers have removed what little interest I had in the game. Tyson Fury is going to tour around helping people with their mental health showing what a great bloke he is. I must mention a day at the races with Prince Charles and Camilla parading around in the royal horse and cart.....someone should have a word with his royal highness regarding the hideous top hat. I watched a fascinating programme on films which go horribly wrong featuring ,among many, Rachael Welch as a BLOKE....and The Life Of Brian..... The mis-use of "I" and "me" will be explained. The song this week is one I wrote and produced which paints a musical portrait of my favourite place....The Wirral Peninsula.....

The Shortest Song in the World Don Woods 12th June 2022 Complaints about the coverage of the Jubilee Complaints about little Prince George's behaviour Petrol prices still on the rise but apparently Boris's Xmas party is still more important Cliff Richard pushing for new laws to protect those accused of sexual offences until after the case....go Cliff! !It is now DOCTOR Sir Ringo A move to issue fines to New Zealand farmers for the release of methane from their sheep and cows The week's worst record selection..... The Shortest Song In The World....by Duncan Reid and The Big Heads

1.The Queen's Jubilee 2.Archbishop of Canterbury asking whether we should be more forgiving....and mentioning Prince Andrew 3.Is it right that prisoners should be shouted at? 4.Wrexham's failed bid to be the Capital of Culture....which was won by Bradford. 5.Should we go back to imperial measurement instead of metric? 6.My answers to cancelled flights and overpriced eating and drinking out. 7.Modern dance music belongs in night clubs not on "mature" radio.....an example is a song I had to suffer on my car radio on a recent long drive.....I switched the radio off after a few minutes ...I would suggest you do the same....the song is "I'm in love with your body"....by Ed Sheeran.......the record has zero production and I've estimated must have cost about 2 quid to make.....I would like to suggest this as my weekly worst record choice.....I know millions would disagree as he is very popular...I might have liked him when I was 13....but probably not.

After facing the pandemonium of cancelled flights and police tear gas outside the stadium the Liverpool fans were left with a hard to to take defeat in the Euro final.....some even hired a speedboat to get there....a bit of a damp squib to end the season on with a game they tactically should have won...and would have done had the Spanish goalie not played a blinder. Boris and his Christmas party is still headline news....will we ever move on?.....and there's nothing more annoying than someone shouting to the Prime Minister as he walks to his car "Are you going to resign Prime Minister?"....which Boris rightly ignores.....and it would make a nice change if the Labour Party actually came up with something constructive instead of constantly criticising the Government. Also the horrific shooting of school kids in America has had blanket coverage on the news.....it is difficult for people who live in countries where guns are illegal to comprehend the American viewpoint. The rolling headlines underneath the BBC News bulletins went slightly wrong.....they were (apparently) training someone on how it's done and he typed in "Manchester United are rubbish" which accidentally came up on the screen as the news was being read......the BBC have apologised. I watched documentary on the 40 years of ABBA since they packed up....very interesting and quite tragic in parts.Prices of everything continue to rise for no real apparent reason....a pal of mine uses a car wash each week and the cost has gone up by £4......."because they can't get the chemicals".....soap and water isn't it?....and with cups of tea costing at least £2.50 it is cheaper to drink Diesel..... This week's worst song selection....They're Coming to Take Me Away Ha Ha.....by Sloppy Jane....almost as bad as Yoko Ono. Sloppy Jane is an American avant-garde rock band fronted by Haley Dahl. The band released their breakthrough second studio album Madison in 2021, through Saddest Factory Records, an imprint owned by their former bassist Phoebe Bridgers. Dahl is known for her eccentric performance art style which sometimes includes nudity

Hi Vince....here's this week's subjects....the song was a good find...I remember it well. you will find it on Spotify or YouTube ...BUT make sure it is by Dina Garipova as there are a few different songs with the same title......."What If" by Dina Garipova. Packaging.....why is everything you buy so hard to open without a road drill? The footballer coming out as gay has hit the news....this aint news...who cares?...on his money he should learn to ignore abuse from morons. Prince William and the national anthem was booed at the cup final.....and as always the small handful of boneheads get maximum publicity from the media who continue to scrape the barrel for "news". And still on the Royalty front...Charles and Camilla will be appearing in East Enders which defies comment. The 4 hours of the Eurovision also received another shed load on the news which brought in many complaints to the BBC who as usual "felt they got it right" Along with Speke Airport becoming The John Lennon Airport we now have a ferry terminal on the Mersey being named The Gerry Marsden Terminal....what next the Ringo Star Yellow Submarine....sorry...SIR Ringo. The couple who won 180 million on the lottery have been squirting champagne everywhere on the news.....big mistake in my opinion.

I watched the FA Cup final which is a couple of hours I wont get back....I've seen better games in the local park .I had one too many pints during the Cup Final (to ease the boredom) and fell asleep during the Eurovision Song Contest....I woke up at the start of the results with Graham Norton talking over the presenters....someone should have put a gag on him.....I was glad that Ukraine won which showed that the world are behind them.....we came second which made a change. Kier Stermer's pathetic attempt at "integrity"was a joke and an insult to our intelligence. Prince Charles carrying out the Queen's Speech with a ton of medals on his tunic and a massive sword he had to keep off the ground....he looked like a cartoon. A potrait of Marilyn Monroe by Andy Waholwhich has sold for 195 million dollars....I think the expression is "more money than sense" There is a new format of "The Chase" which is well past it's sell by date.....so Bradley is still everywhere you look.Packaging.....some things are impossible to get into without a road drill. This week's bad record is one from the distant past.....it's by Frank Ifield who had three consecutive number ones back in the day....however although this song was a hit the more you hear it the more irritating it gets......it is called "She Taught Me To Yodel" by Frank Ifield.

We have just been subjected to the local elections with blanket TV coverage....personally I couldn't be less interested.....with BBC reporters being sent all over the country by planes and trains to do interviews in the street....well worth my licence fee.....I don't think. Then we have the big build up to Susanna Reid interviewing Boris `Johnson....which is the first interview he has done on ITV in 5 years....I switched it off half way through.....the only way it could have been worse was if Piers Morgan had interviewed him. After Kier Starmer has been going on and on and on about the Boris Xmas party....he is now being investigated for a similar "offence" a year ago.....and THIS is news.....it's like a bunch of school kids. I'm delighted for BP and Shell after they announced the billions they have made in profits....of course they have made billions...they have been ripping us off for years.....the rich get richer......diesel is £1.74 a litre which in real terms is £7 a gallon....it's a joke. And on the subject of rip offs....there has been many complaints from football fans over the price of tickets....apparently you can pay 100 quid to watch the cup final at Wembley....which doesn't include your travel etc....OR you can watch it on the telly for nothing.....I understand the overpowering loyalty of fans but to me it's just a football match...that's all....and you are not FORCED into being ripped off.......the answer is simple...don't go...and watch the prices amazingly come down. Prince Charles has been briefly appearing on the news at various events.....someone should tell his royal highness that the big brown overcoat he wears is not cool.....it belongs in world war 1.......and we understand that Harry and Andrew will not be appearing on the royal balcony as they are no longer members of the family....or something. Worst record of the week features Jess Conrad's Bad Jumper

The recent dry weather will cause possible problems....forest fires...draught etc etc......same thing at the same time every year. Boris Becker is off to jail because of undeclared assets....Bankrupt Boris has got 2 years.....the price of fame .Porn in Parliament...M.P. Neil Parish has been a naughty boy....or so it seems. A D.J. called Westwood who works on Capital Radio (I think) has been accused of sexual misbehaviour by a few women which he has strenuously denied....but of course he must be guilty because the media say so.......yet another witch hunt And more job justification....some nameless genius has come up with an idea to stop child obesity....apparently a suggestion has been made to take sugary breakfast cereals off the front of the shelves in supermarkets....because they obviously "force" shoppers to buy them....so Frosties have to go to the back of the shelf.....this has gone down well with the manufacturers of these products as you can imagine .Who killed Freddie Mills?....a very interesting documentary I watched recently. There has been an increase in the number of cubs and scouts and youngsters are having a good time....many years ago I was commissioned to write a song about the scout movement which actually began in one of our local parks..Arrowe Park....so I came up with "Scouts Of The World" and got my then 8 year old son to sing it (he is now 43).....I eventually sent it to the Scout Association who took it on......recently I got an Email from a local scout group asking me if they could sing it at a local jamboree....so I would like to feature it in this weeks music spot....Scouts of The World...sung by Stephen Woods

The news is still going on about Boris Johnson's Xmas party.....all this is doing now is giving no mark M.P.s the opportunity to get their faces on TV all saying the same thing with none of them coming up with any alternative solutions.....definitely time to MOVE ON. The easiest job in the world is be a critic or a football pundit....we have professional film critics who grace us with their opinions....and pundits who sit round a table and discuss a match we have just watched....and get highly paid for doing so....talk about easy money.....and this comes out of our TV licence....which will no doubt soon go up because of the shortage of oil or something equally as stupid. Main roads are being altered to include wide cycle lanes.....how long before the accidents start?....not to mention idiots on electric bikes. The local council's latest brilliant idea is to increase the charge of emptying your garden waste bin from 35 pounds to 50 pounds a year which hasn't gone down too well with our ratepayers.....as the said bins are only emptied every two weeks and don't require emptying during the winter.... are they having a laugh.......what will obviously happen is folk will fly tip their grass all over the place.....the council complain that they are short of money...try checking out the salaries of some of the bosses who are surplus to requirements. We have a terrible war going on but 17 minutes of space is required on the BBC News to watch Johnny Depp mumbling away in court with his marital problems...WHO CARES?............... put him on my list.I watched another episode of the Jimmy Saville scandal......which left me totally baffled......he walks around with this huge cigar in his mouth....takes it out and mutters a load of nonsense...and shoves it back in his mouth....they could find no evidence of his alleged sexual misconduct until he died....then we get 400 accusers coming out of the woodwork.....to me the bloke was a total nut case. A film called "The Magnet" has recently been on the telly....it was made in 1951 and stars James `Fox as a young lad and was filmed in and around Wallasey on Merseyside where I was born......it was fascinating to see how the area has changed since I was a six year old.....great film. This week...for a change...instead of choosing some of the worst records ever made I would like to treat you to the best instrumental ever made....it dates back to the fifties and I still never tire of hearing it....a masterpiece....it is by The Ventures and is called "Walk Don't Run"......

The John Leslie trials by media.....Leslie was found innocent of any sexual wrongdoing after past accusations from various women,,,yet no-one seems to stand trial for these false accusations after ruining his life. ....... I watched a documentary on Kathy Kirby....she was a big star back in the day but became a victim of fame. Vince's Interview re Kathy.. 7. This week's bad record. "Didn't He Do Well" by Bruce Forsyth...Brucie was a very talented showbiz personality but should have avoided this song.

Harry Biilinge...D-Day survivor sadly passed away aged 96...spent his life raising money for a D-Day monument on the Normandy coast....a great man and a REAL knight of the realm. 2.Kinder eggs have been recalled over a salmonella scare....just in time for Easter 3.The multi talentless Ant and Dec have won ANOTHER BAFTA for their Sa'aday Night tirkawir...which says it all. 4.Will Smith is still making the news as he has been given a 10 year ban from the Oscars;...who cares?...I only wish it had been Tyson Fury on the end of his slap....that would have been worth watching....no more red carpet for him. 5.The Grand National is in town....I can't control my excitement 6.If you play Monty Listers jingle about all the places he has been I can give you some anecdotes of some of my adventures with him. 7 .Worst ever song by Peter Cook is Lovely Lady of the roses

1. Eco Activists and the guy who stuck his hand to the radio studio mic 2. Fake Everton Replica Shirts! 3. Holiday 'getaway' trafffic jams......how do we enjoy sitting in traffic jams? 4. BBC Giving away Plastic Toys with their publications 5 The Boat Race-How exciting is that? Hundreds of spectators gathered under sunny skies along the River Thames in London for the annual university boat race, as weather forecasters predicted a 'fine Sunday' following a noticeably chilly start to April. ............... 6. Urban Seagulls. 7. The Story of one of Don's Jingles. This week....What Have I got in my Hand? 8. We discuss the life and times of a great Welsh singer called David Alexander and this takes us nicely to Wales, singing and the story of Coal in the UK. Great song this week by David Alexander called The Working Man

Hi Vince....here's some topics for Monday....I've included some of the stuff lost in the clouds last week Items for discussion The P & O sackings with one days notice have been headline news Gareth Bale being heavily criticised for making more effort playing for his country than he did playing for his Spanish team....and his re-action....(Back in the day Jasper Carrot had the answer to HIS critics) Rock Til We Drop ...the final at the Isle of Wight Festival with local lad Arty Davies The documentary on Tom Jones at 80 The documentary on John Lennon called Imagine Bill Wyman's marriage and selection of relatives he acquired. Worst record spot....It's Gonna Rain by Yoko Ono....pass me those ear plugs

Hi Vince here's a few subjects to chew over....I've got some good input. First the blanket coverage of the war is getting criticised.....and the showing of information which would be of use to the Russians .The P & O fiasco with the sacking of 800 employees without notice The ridiculous price of petrol and beer....rip offs only last a short time Two TV programmes ....Tom Jones at 80.....John Lennon Imagine Michael Portillo's railway journey to Holyhead. Bill Wyman's past wedding. Us older folk complain a lot about modern music.....however this is an example of what we had back then.....The Bee Song by Arthur Askey.