Surviving Divorce Podcast: Hope, Healing, Recovery, Personal Finance, Co-Parenting

In this episode I continue the discussion of the stages of the grieving process. Dealing With Depression After Divorce Depression is a normal part of the grieving process.  It typically comes after the bargaining phase when we are starting to come to grips with the fact that the marriage is truly over.  It's a phase that most people go through before finally reaching acceptance and moving on. Signs Of Depression Some common signs of depression include sleep disruptions, appetite changes, fatigue and general lack of energy, loneliness, feelings of isolation and emptiness.  Most grief induced depressions are temporary and will pass; however, if you have several of these symptoms that last for days or weeks without end you may be facing clinical depression.  If that's the case, or if you ever have suicidal thoughts, contact a health care professional who is trained to deal with depression immediately. How Depression Shows Up Depression after divorce may show its ugly head in several ways: Letting the house go Dishes may pile up for days or weeks Laundry may go unwashed Losing interest in favorite activities hobbies exercise volunteering Lack of focus at work Wanting to sleep all the time Lack of interest in personal appearance Distancing yourself from friends and family Over or under eating Combating Depression You really need to find something to take your mind off of your current situation.  Reading a good book where you can escape into the story may help.  Volunteering at your church or favorite charity can put your focus on others rather than yourself.  Re-engaging with friends or changing up your routine can also help. How Do You Know You're Making Progress Progress can be measured in small steps.  You get the dishes done every couple of days.  Laundry may actually get washed (even if it doesn't get folded).  Your appetite returns to normal.  You are able to focus better on you tasks at work and home. Wrap-up You can support the podcast by starting a free trial with Audible.com here Please consider leaving a review in iTunes if you enjoy the podcast. It will help keep it visible for others to find it. If you'd like to discuss this topic you can leave a comment below and I'll gladly join you. And finally, if you have a question you would like me to address you can leave a message on Listener Feedback Line at 347-433-7664 or email me at feedback@survivingdivorcepodcast.com  

In Episode 2 I discussed how the grieving process applies to divorce.  In the next few podcasts I will discuss the stages in more detail. Dealing With Anger I can't imagine going through divorce without being angry.  You are facing a time when your dreams are crashing down around you. You've possibly been rejected by the person you pledged the rest of your life to.  Your ex may have cheated on you or you may be facing extreme financial difficulties. Anger Is Normal You will most likely be angry at your ex or soon-to-be ex.  You may also be angry at friends who took your ex's side in the divorce.  Family may not be as supportive as you would like them to be and this can cause you to be angry.  You may find you're just angry at life in general and if you're a person of faith you may find you are angry at God. Anger Is Healthy Dealing with anger is a part of the normal grieving process.  When you come through denial and realize that you, in fact, are either divorce or soon to be divorced, anger is the normal response for all the reasons listed above.  Suppressing your anger is not healthy and can lead to bitterness and depression.  Learning to express you anger in a non-destructive way is essential. Destructive Anger There are numerous destructive ways of dealing with anger.  A common destructive way of dealing with anger is lashing out.  You may yell at your kids, family, friends, or coworkers who are just innocent bystanders.  It's likely you will lash out at your ex but this is not productive.  Divorce turns a marriage into a business transaction.  Your best hope of getting the best possible settlement is to negotiate in a businesslike fashion with your ex.  Being angry and trying to "punish" your ex will only pad the pockets of the lawyers. There are also many other destructive ways of expressing anger.  From throwing your ex's belongings on the front lawn to slashing their tires.  These types of behaviors can get you a restraining order if your lucky or criminal charges if your ex isn't in a forgiving mood. How To Deal With Anger I don't have any revolutionary advice for dealing with the anger.  The proverbial "count to 10" is one of the best strategies for dealing with anger.  If you just take away the knee jerk response and think about what to do you will usually make a much better decision.  After the fact, you can analyze what is making you angry and decide if you can do anything about it.  If you can do something... do it.  If not, then you need to work on accepting it and move on.  Easier said than done. Wrap-up You can support the podcast by starting a free trial with Audible.com here Please consider leaving a review in iTunes if you enjoy the podcast. It will help keep it visible for others to find it. If you'd like to discuss this topic you can leave a comment below and I'll gladly join you. And finally, if you have a question you would like me to address you can leave a message on Listener Feedback Line at 347-433-7664 or email me at feedback@survivingdivorcepodcast.com  

Budgeting For The Holidays I covered budgeting in general in Episode 4 of the Surviving Divorce Podcast, but with the holiday season approaching I wanted to revisit it.  I've seen several news articles and blog posts about Black Friday lately and thought I should give you some advice for dealing with the holidays. A Budgeting Review Most of us will be worse off financially after a divorce.  A very few of you may be better off but that is definitely not the norm. The rest of you need to: Creat a budget - This a monthly budget that you do every month.  Each month is different and you need to plan in advance how you will spend your money Avoid using credit cards - If you don't have the money now you probably won't have it when the bill comes due. Make the tough decisions - you probably can't maintain your pre-divorce lifestyle.  Things like cell phones, cable, etc. may need to be cut Holidays - Halloween I'm writing this in late October and Halloween is fast approaching.  If this is a holiday you have historically celebrated you may need to adjust your plans for this year. Make costumes for your kids Make treats to give out or just leave your light off Thanksgiving You may not be able to afford traveling across the country to see family at Thanksgiving.  Have family come to you if possible or be creative and have a Skype Thanksgiving.  Don't have credit card bills from travel expenses come due right before Christmas Christmas Your kids need you not a pile of gifts. Don't try to make up for not being there by overspending. Create a budget for the holidays including for your gift giving Create lasting memories by spending time together Do NOT get in a gift giving competition with your ex.  It's not good for the kids and will wreck your finances. Wrap-up You can support the podcast by starting a free trial with Audible.com here Please consider leaving a review in iTunes if you enjoy the podcast. It will help keep it visible for others to find it. If you'd like to discuss this topic you can leave a comment below and I'll gladly join you. And finally, if you have a question you would like me to address you can leave a message on Listener Feedback Line at 347-433-7664 or email me at feedback@survivingdivorcepodcast.com    

Going through divorce is a time of great change.  One of the most significant changes is learning to live again as a single person. Going from "we" to "me" can seem daunting. We Live In A Couples Oriented Society Things like eating out, going to a movie, sporting events, worship services, vacation, etc. are all things that you've been doing as a couple for some time.  The thought of asking for a table for 1 at a restaurant or sitting by yourself at a movie seems terrifying. Going to church was very difficult for me.  Sitting down for Sunday worship services without my wife brought waves of sadness and regret.  Many well meaning people tried to cheer me up but it didn't really help. Doing Things On Your Own Your ex may have taken care of the money, did all the cooking, did the shopping, fixed things around the house, or taken care of the car maintenance.  These are all things that you may now have to learn to do. You will now have to do all of the cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc.  If you're a custodial parent you now have full responsibility for caring for the children.  You can't come home after a stressful day at work and just relax because there are mouths to feed, homework to do and all of the other things associated with kids. You may have to learn to do things for the first time.  Cooking, laundry, vehicle maintenance, household repairs are all things that must be done even if you're not sure where to start. Q&A I answered an anonymous question about divorce after a long term marriage.  Basically it takes time and don't rush it.  Don't rush in to a new relationship but also don't write off the possibility of a new relationship down the road.  Your kids are hurting as much or more than your are so give them the freedom to grieve as well, but try not to bash your ex in front of your kids.  Don't vent to them about your problems with their other parent.  That's what friends and support groups are for. Wrap-up You can support the podcast by starting a free trial with Audible.com here Please consider leaving a review in iTunes if you enjoy the podcast. It will help keep it visible for others to find it. If you'd like to discuss this topic you can leave a comment below and I'll gladly join you. And finally, if you have a question you would like me to address you can leave a message on Listener Feedback Line at 347-433-7664 or email me at feedback@survivingdivorcepodcast.com

Is Your Glass Half Full or Half Empty? Your mental attitude can play a significant role in your experience healing from divorce.  If you are a glass half full kind of person, you will likely forge through the healing process but may not take the time you need to truly heal.  If your glass is always half empty then you are likely to get stuck in the anger or depression stages of the healing process. A Tale of Two Divorcees I recently heard a podcast from Dan Miller where he used the opening lines of Charles Dickens' "A Tale of Two Cities" to compare peoples' responses to the economy and I thought it also would make a good illustration for the impact of your mental attitude on your reaction to the divorce process.  The book starts like this: "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way." Divorce can be both the best of times and the worst of times. For me it was the worst of times. I was blind-sided by my divorce and really spiraled down for awhile until I realized that it was an opportunity to grow and have an even better life than I had before. Even for those who wanted the divorce it can often feel like the worst of times. Divorce is such an upheaval that few can get through it without going through a significant amount of pain. The time immediately following a divorce is often marked by many foolish behaviors such as dating too soon, becoming promiscuous, and even drug and alcohol addiction. But this time can also be a time of great wisdom. An ancient Chinese proverb states that wisdom is knowing what you know and knowing what you don't know. Realizing that you are in unknown territory and seeking help after your divorce is one of the wisest things you can do. What Now? If you are a glass half empty kind of person, I would suggest doing some introspection to see what it is about you that makes you that way. A more positive mental attitude can greatly increase your likelihood of successfully completing the healing process after divorce. Feedback: If you have feedback for me please email me at feedback@survivingdivorcepodcast.com or call the listener feedback line at (347) 433-7664.  If you have a question I will answer it on an upcoming episode of the Surviving Divorce Podcast.  

The year after your divorce is filled with "firsts" First night/weekend without your kids This can be very emotional.  Even though you've most likely been away from your kids for periods of time in the past, the fact that it is court ordered and you don't have a choice can bring a flood of emotions First church service This was tough for me.  Sitting there without my wife beside me was almost more than I could take.  I also had to face the fact that I was angry with God for allowing my divorce to happen First Birthdays Yours Your kid's Your ex's Parties are tough especially if you try to have a combined party for your kids First Holidays With family gatherings, work parties, and dealing with not having your kids over the holidays you can be set up for an ambush of emotions.  From anger to depression, the first holidays after your divorce can be anything but happy. First Time You See Your Ex With A New BF/GF This can be especially tough because it is usually not planned.  The ambush of emotions that come flooding in can overwhelm you. How To Deal With Firsts In the first months or even a year after your divorce you really need to lean on your friends and family for support.  Don't be too proud to tell people how you are feeling.   This is not a time to "man up".   You also need to lean on your faith.  I clung tightly to my faith in the months and years after my divorce and it helped to pull me through.  As it says in Phil 4:13 we really can do all things through him who gives us strength. Tell Me What You Think Leave a comment below or call the feedback hotline at (347) 433-7664 and leave a message. If you have a question I will try to answer it on an upcoming show.    

Facebook Stalking: I recently read an article detailing a study conducted by Dr. Tara Marshall of Brunel University in London where she studied the effects of ongoing  monitoring of an ex's activities via Facebook (Facebook Stalking). She "sought to fill this research gap by examining whether remaining Facebook friends with a former partner and checking his or her Facebook profile is associated with continuing breakup-related distress, negative feelings, desire for the ex-partner, and inhibited personal growth." She studied two groups of people.  The first group were those who de-friended their ex after the break-up but continued to monitor his/her activities using Facebook.  The second were those who remained Facebook friends. Her results were not exactly what she expected.  Those who "stalked"  were associated with "greater current distress over the breakup, negative feelings, sexual desire, longing for the ex-partner, and lower personal growth."  And "people who remained Facebook friends with an ex-partner were lower in negative feelings, sexual desire, and longing for the former partner than people who were not Facebook friends but still exhibited lower personal growth." My take on this is that continued interest in your ex's activities often indicates a continued attachment or jealousy, either of which would indicate that you have not moved through the grieving process and reached the acceptance stage. You may be stuck in any of the four previous stages and continued monitoring of your ex's activities just keeps adding new things to your list of losses that need to be dealt with. Baggage Diane called in with a question about how to avoid bringing baggage from her previous marriage into a new one.  My advice is to make sure you have grieved and forgiven your ex.  Also don't project your feeling for your ex onto your new partner.  Talk things out and if that doesn't work seek out professional help. Questions If you have a question you would like answered on the show, please call the listener feedback line at (347) 433-7664 or just click on the feedback tab to the right and leave a message with your computer microphone. Leave a comment in the comments section and start a conversation.  

Forgiving Your Ex is Tough After going through the pain of divorce even the thought of forgiving your ex can seem impossible.  But forgiving is one of the keys to truly healing after your divorce. 5 Stages of Grief In episode 2 we discussed the 5 stages of grief in detail.  In summary they are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.  Somewhere during this process you need to forgive your ex. Why Forgive? As a Christian I believe that forgiving is not an option, it is a command.  Jesus states in Luke 6:37 "...Forgive and you will be forgiven".  Our receiving God's forgiveness is tied to our willingness to forgive those that have hurt us.. A recent article from the Huffington Post titled "Seven Reasons To Forgive Your Ex"  caught my eye.  The seven reasons given are (paraphrased): Forgiveness is for you. Forgiveness doesn't mean you condone what your ex did to you. Forgiveness helps you turn the corner. Forgiveness allows you to release difficult emotions. Anger and resentment are toxic. It's good for the kids. The pleasure of getting even is short lived. These match very closely with what I've learned and observed from leading a DivorceCare support group for 6 years. Now let's look at those in a little more depth. Forgiveness is for you and it doesn't mean you condone what your ex did.  It's not for your ex, it's for you.  Forgiving releases your hold on your ex and puts them in God's hands.  Until you can truly forgive your ex, their actions will continue to control your emotions and cloud future relationships.  They obviously hurt you in some way and forgiving doesn't say that was OK.  It simply means you are choosing to move beyond the hurt and let healing start. Forgiveness allows you to turn the corner toward a healthy you and release all those toxic emotions you have pent up inside.  If you hold on to your anger it will soon turn to resentment and eventually bitterness.  No one likes to be around an angry and bitter person. It's been said that bitterness is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die. But there are some things that forgiveness is not. Forgiveness is not a feeling, it's a choice.  If you wait until you feel like forgiving you probably never will.  From a Christian perspective you need to choose to forgive and then let God work on your feelings. Forgiveness is not a one time event.  As you work through the grieving process there will be new things come up that require you to forgive your ex again in order to move on through the process. And finally, forgiveness does not mean the restoration of the marriage.  It may simply mean you release your anger.  It may mean you can be civil.  It may mean you can actually be friendly.  In a few cases you may actually become friends again.  And it could actually be the first step that leads to a rekindling of the relationship and restoration of the marriage. But you don't understand. You may be say "but you don't understand, they did ________" (fill in the blank).  The Bible doesn't give us a choice.  If we want to be forgiven of our sins, we must be willing to forgive others. So what do you think? Leave a comment below or call the listener feedback line at (347) 433-7664

Endings & Beginnings Divorce is a time of tragic endings.  It means the end of your marriage, family, dreams, and many more.  You must take time to grieve and heal or will be left with deep emotional wounds that will surface later.  You need time to become emotionally stable and adjust to being single. Divorce is also a time of new beginnings.  Most people will eventually venture into a new relationship.  You will most likely be moving into a new home and may be starting a new job. Who Are You, And Why Are You Here? You should use this time to do some soul searching and figure out who you are.  You will be a different person after divorce and you are definitely a different person than you were before you were married. I am currently reading "Wisdom Meets Passion" by Dan Miller and Jared Angaza.    In it Dan tells a story about a monk who stumbles on a Roman garrison and is asked by a sentry "Who are you, and why are you here?"  the monk then offers to pay the sentry to stand outside his door and ask him the same question every morning. So who are YOU, and why are YOU here? Turn Evil To Good At the end of the book of Genesis Joseph is speaking to his brothers who had sold him into slavery and makes the statement that "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done" Gen 50:20.  You see, by being sold into slavery Joseph was later in a position to save his family from a famine. Paul tells us in Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose" How can you take the experience of divorce and use it to better yourself and the lives of others? Feedback Please leave a comment and tell me how you are listening to the show and if you are listening in iTunes, please consider leaving some feedback there.  That will help keep the show visible so others can find it. You can leave a voicemail question by calling 347-433-7664 or by clicking on the button to the right. If your interested in purchasing "Wisdom Meets Passion" you can click here.  This is an affiliate link with Amazon and any purchases made through the link will help support the podcast.  

Co-Parenting In this episode of the Surviving Divorce Podcast I discuss co-parenting, why it's a good idea and when it's not a good idea. Why You Should Co-Parent With Your Ex: Children need both parents involved in their lives.  They need both a mom's perspective and a dad's perspective.  Mother's tend to be more nurturing and Dad's tend to be the disciplinarian.  That's not always the case and some of you may accuse me of stereotyping, but kids really do need both genders involved in there lives in a positive way Co-parenting can help you present a united front to your kids.  Kids will push the boundaries and often try to play parents against each other.  This even happens in in-tact families but can be even more of an issue for divorced parents. Keeping major rules and expectations consistent between households can help your children feel stable and less confused.  Bedtimes for younger children should be the same and routines for things such and homework and chores should be as similar as possible. Working together on financial needs and parenting schedules can also help children feel secure.  It's often said that divorce turns a marriage into a business arrangement, but when it comes to the kids, their needs should come first.  Being flexible with visitations schedules can make everyone feel more comfortable and can ease the stress of having two homes. When Co-Parenting is Not a Good Idea If your ex has a history of abuse, has court ordered supervised visitation, or is mentally unstable then trying to keep them involved can do more harm than good.  In this case, stick to the court ordered arrangements and try not to put your ex down in front of your children. Also, if your ex just doesn't want to be involved there isn't much you can do.  You can't push a rope.  You still need to try, but if they just don't want to be involved then there isn't much you can do. iTunes Please consider leaving a review and rating on iTunes for the podcast.  This will help keep it visible so others can find it. Questions / Comments If you have a question or comment you can call the listener feedback line at 347-433-7664 or just click the feedback link to the right and use your computer's microphone.  I will try to answer questions on the air.  You can also leave a comment below.

  Divorced Parents have it rough.  In this episode of the Surviving Divorce Podcast I rehash some tips for divorced parents that were shared previously on the blog. For All Divorced Parents: Your children are hurting as much or more than you are Don't try to get them to take sides Your children still need two parents involved in their lives Try to make major parenting decisions together Be flexible with visitation schedules when possible Give your kids as much say as possible on when they see their other parent Your children will likely still have hopes of you re-uniting with your ex for years after the divorce Your children may not be supportive of you dating Your children don't want to hear you bad-mouthing their other parent Your children don't want to be used as messengers Don't over-extend yourself financially to maintain all of their pre-divorce activities and lifestyle. For Custodial Parents: Your children still love and miss the non-custodial parent Keep the non-custodial parent informed of school, sports, and church events Don't use the excuse that the child support was late for not doing things, even if that is the reason. For Non-Custodial Parents: Your children want to know you care by spending time with them Your children are hurt deeply if you don't show up when you are supposed to Don't substitute money or gifts for spending time with your children Your children want you to come to their school, sports, or church activities Your children want to hear from you regularly even if you can't be with them You have a moral and legal obligation to pay child support. Just do it. Don't expect all of your support money to be spent specifically on the kids, That's not how it works This is the first in a series of podcasts dealing with divorced parents.  The podcasts in this series will probably be spread out over the next few months. If you enjoy and value the podcast, please consider leaving a favorable review in iTunes.  It will help keep the podcast visible in the search results. Also comment below or leave me a voice message by clicking on the tab to the right or calling 347-433-7664 And don't forget to sign up for the free budgeting toolkit. Have a blessed week G.D.

In this episode of the surviving divorce podcast I discuss the importance of taking time for yourself. Life can seem overwhelming in the months and years following a divorce.  You are riding an emotional roller coaster and you just don't have the emotional energy to keep up with your pre-divorce schedule.  The depression, anger, and loneliness stemming from the divorce process take a toll on you and make it hard to bounce back. Work, the pressures of running a household by yourself, and the pressures of single parenting can take their toll.  Having to handle all of the household chores by yourself can be a major adjustment, especially if you shared those duties in your marriage. Becoming a single parent is arguably the biggest cause of added stress after a divorce.  Your children are hurting as much or more than you are and tensions are high in the family. It is important for you to make some time for yourself to relax and de-stress on  a regular basis.  You may want to read, go for a walk, go to the gym, or anything else that you enjoy.  Your children and those around you will thank you for spending some time on yourself.  You will be a better parent, employee, friend, etc. if you take care of yourself first. It's like the pre-flight instructions flight attendants give before a flight.  They tell you that if the cabin loses pressure and you are sitting next to someone who needs help, put your oxygen mask on first before helping others.  You can't help them if you pass out due to lack of oxygen. You can't be the best you can be if you are running on empty. Please leave a comment and tell me what you think. If you have a question you would like answered on the podcast leave a voicemail at 347-433-7664 or click on the link to the right and use your computer microphone. God Bless, G.D.

In my latest blog post I discussed the tough financial decisions that often must be made following divorce.  In this podcast episode I dig a little deeper into that and give you the budgeting tools you will need to gain control of your financial future. Most of us who are divorced experienced a loss of income and the associated living standard as a result of the divorce.  There are a select few who will actually be better off financially after a divorce but they are the exception, not the rule. I was the primary breadwinner in my household.  My ex-wife was a stay-at-home-mom for the last few years of our marriage and had just re-entered the workforce prior to our divorce.  I thought that I would be better off financially, and probably would have been, but I bought a big screen TV, home theater system, and motorcycle immediately after my divorce.  This set me back a few grand and started a period of overspending that took me deeper into debt. Fortunately I happened on Dave Ramsey's "The Total Money Makeover" and got my finances back on track. If you find yourself struggling with finances, one of the best things you can do is create a budget and stick to it.  One of the biggest mistakes people make when creating a budget is trying to fabricated the ultimate budget that handles all situations. The best way to budget is to create a new budget every month that accounts for the income and expenses of that month.  Take care of the essentials first (food, housing, utilities, and transportation) before spending money on other things. If you create a budget and find that you don't have enough money to cover your expenses you will have to make some tough decisions. but don't panic.  Your budget is tool that can help you get your spending under control and start making progress. I have created a budgeting toolkit to help you get started.  Get your free Surviving Divorce Podcast Budgeting Toolkit here. God Bless G.D.  

In this episode of the Surviving Divorce Podcast I will cover dating after divorce. One of the questions I am asked most often is "When can I start dating again after divorce?"  I've covered this topic in the blog but thought it deserved a podcast episode as well. It's only natural to want a new relationship after a divorce.  You want to know if you've still "got it", you may want revenge, and you just want the pain to go away. Unfortunately there are significant dangers to dating too soon.  You may be having a rebound relationship which come with a host of problems and very seldom last. So when are you ready? If there is a chance of reconciliation with your ex-spouse then dating will only confuse matters.  If you still have strong feelings for your ex, either good or bad, you likely aren't ready.  If you are overwhelmed by life after divorce you probably don't have the emotional energy to invest. And, if you haven't worked through the stages of grief you will probably bring baggage into the relationship that will sabotage it. There are also spiritual considerations to consider when choosing to date.  Please seek the counsel of a pastor or spiritual adviser before jumping in. So how long will it be before you're ready? There is no easy answer, but there are some guidelines that I have seen hold the test of time. Most experts agree that you need to wait at least one year before dating.  Beyond that, opinions vary widely.  The DivorceCare material that I taught for years suggested that it takes 1 year of healing for every 3-4 years of marriage. My personal experience closely mirrors this timeline.  I was married for nearly 13 years and started dating after about two but I was not really ready for a serious relationship until about five years after my divorce. So please, don't rush in to a new relationship.  Second marriages have a divorce rate of over 60% and for third marriages this raises to over 70%. Only you can know if your ready.  If you think you are then begin slowly but don't be afraid to pull back and wait awhile if you find you aren't. If you have feedback or questions for the Surviving Divorce Podcast please call 347-433-7664 and leave a message. You can find some recommended resources here.

In this episode of the Surviving Divorce Podcast I discuss the 5 stages of grief and how they apply to healing from divorce. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross first proposed that there are 5 stages of grief that a person typically experiences when faced with the loss of a loved one.  These are Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance.  Ross was initially concerned with people who had lost a loved one to death but soon realized these principles applied to any major loss in one's life.  Surviving divorce requires that you identify and grieve the losses you have faced. Losses From Divorce Divorce brings many losses.  From loss of one's companion and spouse to loss of financial stability there are many things that are lost during the divorce process.  Following is a list of a few of them: Loss of a companion Loss of a dream Loss of pride Loss of financial security Loss of a co-parent Loss of insurance Loss of your home Taking Inventory It is much easier to understand why divorce hurts so much when you take proper inventory of the losses you have faced.  I have developed a Losses Inventory Check Sheet to help you identify your losses so you can assess your progress along the road to healing from divorce.  You can get your copy  and be notified of new content by signing up for the newsletter in the right sidebar. Related Podcast Episodes Dating After Divorce Making Time For You Forgiving Your Ex  Dealing With Anger From We To Me Wrap-up You can support the podcast by starting a free trial with Audible.com here Please consider leaving a review in iTunes if you enjoy the podcast. It will help keep it visible for others to find it. If you'd like to discuss this topic you can leave a comment below and I'll gladly join you. And finally, if you have a question you would like me to address you can leave a message on Listener Feedback Line at 347-433-7664 or email me at feedback@survivingdivorcepodcast.com