The Chris LoCurto Show

You’ve probably heard us talk about making others successful. It’s one of our core pursuits here. In fact, we just did a whole show on this a few weeks back, episode no. 504.Well, there’s a flip side to all of that: it’s when we throw obstacles in another person’s way. The sad thing is that most of us have probably done this at some point in our lives, and we’ve likely had it done to us as well. It sucks and it’s becoming more common all the time!Setting someone’s reality is a divisive way to trip others up and make them stumble.Another hot topic nowadays is gaslighting. That’s manipulating someone in order to make them question their own perspective or reality. And that’s really close to setting someone’s reality.Folks typically do stuff like this in times of conflict with others, or when feeling out of control.On the show today, how to keep your reality from being set by others, and maybe even more importantly, how to make sure you’re not doing the same thing to other people!Grace and peace, Chris

Ever feel like there’s not enough time or money? Maybe the bills are piling up Your tasks feel overwhelming You’re living paycheck to paycheck You feel like you’re just getting by The appointments are too many to keep It’s easy to fall into the trap of scarcity thinking. We’ve probably all been there at one time or another. But, what do you do if it becomes a habit and then you feel stuck?A scarcity mindset is when you’re so obsessed with the lack of something — usually time or money — that you can't focus on anything else, no matter how hard you try. And, over time, that deficit starts to grow in your mind. The research says that it could also start to affect you in reality. What you think about too much can make a deep impact.This is a trained behavior, rooted in fear and anxiety. And it must be unlearned. It requires a focus shift, and on today’s show we’re going to talk about that shift in mindset. Before we dig in, however, let me ask you to self-assess. Where do you find a kind of persistent negative self-talk in your life? Phrases like these: I can’t… I don’t have… I won’t be able to… I’m not enough… I’ll never be… It’s too tough… There’s not enough… There’s too much competition… They won’t accept me… Are you ready to kick the scarcity-mentality habit? Then let’s take a step towards a healthier, freer life together. Join me on today’s episode for the paradigm shift you’ve been waiting for!Grace and peace,Chris

Hey leaders, we’ve got a power-packed new series coming at you!First up, your job as a leader is to make your team successful, and not the other way around. But, I’ll tell you a secret. If you’ll spend the time and invest the effort… if you’ll make your team successful … then THEY will eventually make YOU successful.A lot of companies aren’t thriving, because the leader is trying to be the big success story. Here’s a spoiler … being a leader … a true, mature, successful leader … involves a few critical elements. These will be incredibly challenging, but also very rewarding. In fact, one of your highest callings, and one of the most fulfilling aspects of your leadership role, will be connected with one of these three servant-based activities:1) Making other people successful, then2) Developing some of them into leaders3) And making those leaders into a teamIn today's episode, we’ll dig into the practice of just HOW to make your team successful.But, here’s what I can tell you at the outset, before we even get started. Are you ready? Immature leaders will spend most of their time asking, what can others do for me? If this is you, then you’ve got your work cut out for you!So, join me on this episode to turn that around!Grace and peace, Chris

Welcome to a brand new year! It’s 2023 and I’ve got some good perspective for you.Tough times are guaranteed to come. Not what you were looking for? Don’t despair, there’s good news that comes along with that. But, let’s evaluate for a moment. How did you feel when you read that part about tough times being guaranteed? If you’re like a lot of people, maybe your heart may have sunk a little bit. Maybe you started worrying.You might’ve even responded by saying, No Chris, the tough times are already here! Well, here’s the thing. It can become an automated response to go into panic mode or feel traumatized by even the smallest kind of distress. Nowadays, it’s “normal” to feel overwhelmed with even one more task getting added to your to-do list. It’s normal that just the slightest bit of stress steals your joy. But it doesn’t have to be that way! What if you could get the upper hand? What if you could start to undermine the crises that are undermining your quality of life?Undermining the crises of life begins with disciplining yourself, your thoughts, and your mind. You can actually control your feelings, your thoughts, and your responses. But it takes practice!Learning to respond to little crises with strength, courage, and resilience will prepare you for bigger crises.In today's episode, I hope you’ll lean into this good perspective on how to tackle bad situations. You’ll see how to undermine a crisis, instead of allowing tough times to tackle you. Prepare yourself to live well, respond well, and help others in this brand-new year!Grace and peace, Chris

What’s the difference between people-pleasing and having a real servant’s heart?Of course, no one wants to be taken advantage of. And it’s good to have healthy boundaries and not let others walk all over you. We talk a lot about that around here!On the other hand, how many times have you tried to do “the right thing”, and then had some kind of conflict in your heart about it afterwards? What were you really trying to accomplish?Yup, now you’ve got your finger on it! It all comes down to our inner motives.Scripture tells us not to be motivated by being seen or recognized by others for our good deeds. It tells us that we should be trying to please God rather than other people. Pretty simple.The problem is that some personality styles are more inclined to pleasing others, and will often move past healthy boundaries in order to feel better about themselves. Root Systems!And even if you’re not one of “those” personality styles, I’ll bet you’ve got some tiny triggers that are programmed into your thinking that can put undue pressure on your good intentions. So, how can you tell whether our motives are genuine? What I mean is, how do we know that we’re not seeking the welfare of others in an effort to increase our own sense of worth? Well, that’s what we dive into on today’s episode. You won’t want to miss this interesting conversation. You might find out something surprising about yourself, just like Brian did!Grace and peace,Chris

Are you positioned to be promoted?As we approach a new year, most people begin 1) reflecting on the year that’s ending, and 2) wondering if they’re positioned to get ahead, to lead, or to grow in the year to come.We all know that there’s nothing magical about the calendar resetting to January first. But for many people, this time of year offers a brief pause to consider their lives, habits, and ambitions. Here’s the deal: you have to put your life together by yourself: thought by thought and action by action. It’s not what you’ve already done that defines you as much as what you’ll do next. To get ahead, move up, or go further, you can’t rest on your laurels, thinking I’ve finally arrived.Life doesn’t give prizes for “been there - done that.” We are creatures made to grow higher, dig deeper, and mature to a fruitful state. But, how do you know if you’re actually making progress?How can you determine if you’re even thinking in line with what success could or even should look like for you? Some people wrestle with the very concept of promotion and just opt-out.In this episode, we’re going to challenge the core concept of what promotion is, determine what it should look like for you, and then help you to examine whether or not you’re on the right path.Don’t let lies and faulty assumptions hold you back from the better life that you really want! Enjoy this episode!Chris

We’re so excited to celebrate 9 years of this podcast with you today!To commemorate this 500th episode, we’re going to talk about what YOU’VE said about this podcast, what YOU want to hear more of, and that’s not all…We’re also going to announce some of our giveaway winners! So, you’ll want to tune in.And, not just for the prizes. The information that you provided through our 500th Giveaway survey has been compiled and the results are in! You might be surprised by what we learned.On this episode, I’m joined by Joel Fortner and Aaron West, and together we’re taking a look at WHY your favorite themes are so important. Let me give you just two examples now.One of the most impactful topics over the last year was identifying the lies. Wow, this is so important. We spent several episodes on this, hitting it from different angles. Why?Most people are unaware of the lies that they’re believing, until they’re confronted with the truth. Even then, it can be hard to unlearn what they’ve programmed themselves to believe. However, without dealing with the lies, they’re going to stay stuck in familiar but unhealthy patterns. These habits and cycles can cause them to be unfruitful in life and relationships. Talking about cycles, another hot topic this year was beating the Crazy Cycle. This is a HUGE problem for so many leaders. And it takes focus, effort, and hard work to break out of.These are just a few of the things that we’ll dig into today, so don’t miss this episode!Grace and peace,Chris

Do you like being told “no” to something that you want to do? Very few people like to hear that word. And a lot of people don’t like telling other people “no”, especially when they want to make those people happy.Why? Because this tiny word packs a powerful punch! To make matters worse, we usually think of it as a negative word, something to be avoided entirely.However, the truth about the word “no” is actually really freeing, for those who choose to embrace it. It can become a tool used to protect and empower.Think about it. It takes real courage to decline an opportunity or shut the door on a relationship. But, this could be the very thing that frees you up, empowers you to move on to more important things, and protects you from being taken advantage of. Someone once said, it’s the setting of limits that introduces us to liberty.Ironically, it’s the setting up of boundaries, whether for ourselves or for others, that creates the very space of freedom and liberty that we’re inwardly craving. On today’s podcast, we’re talking about how freedom begins and ends with this little word.No one is an island. We live in a world surrounded by other people. Saying “no” is a choice we can make that will create new space, new freedom, and new opportunities.Remember: saying no to one thing is saying yes to something else.Enjoy today’s episode!Chris

498 | The Lies Villains Tell Themselves, Part 2

How has examining victim mentality changed or challenged your thinking?Exposing the lies and combating them with the truth will help us to live a life that’s healthy and full of meaning. Victim mentality is just one way that we can rob ourselves of that better life.And while we’ve probably all “played the victim” card - more than a few times - it can be really tough to see when we’re being a bully. Now, you may be thinking, but I’m a nice person, I’d never hurt a fly… Well, let’s walk though this a bit.Everyone goes through seasons in life when insecurities drive them to make poor choices, to lean into others, or even push them around. We’ve all been there, especially when we lose our sense of worth or we wrestle with unhealthy behavior patterns.Think about it. No one is immune to the weights, wounds, and disappointments of life. Have you ever put pressure on someone else to get your own way?Have you ever used emotions, words, or actions to get others to conform?Have you ever uncovered someone else’s weaknesses in order to hide your own?I’ve said this before, without examining our lives, thoughts, and actions, our tendency is to get stuck in harmful and distorted thinking patterns. Without even realizing it, we might even be harming others to get what we want or what we think we need.Today, we expose the other side of Victimhood by looking at the lies that Villains tell themselves. Don’t be afraid to uncover the truth, look at yourself in the mirror, and take the necessary steps to change for the better. Your life - that better life you’ve always wanted - is waiting for you. And, I can tell you that your relationships with others will benefit as well!Enjoy today’s episode,Chris

Have you ever played the “victim-card”? I’m sure that we all have at one time or another. Why? We’ve all been duped into believing some of the Lies Victims Tell Themselves. Here’s the deal, we all struggle with untrue recorded memos in our heads, whether about ourselves or other people, and those recordings are often set to repeat on endless loops. These untruths, or lies, that we tell ourselves usually manifest in two distinct ways: encouraging us to act as innocent victims or evil villains. Acting out, in either way, can be really unhealthy!On today’s episode, we’re going to take some time to examine our lives and make sure that we’re living authentically by learning to interrupt these distorted thought patterns. So, what’s the first step? We’ve got to recognize the lies holding us back from embracing the good life we’re meant to live! I’m sure you’re acquainted with at least a few of these:I’m not good enoughI’ll never measure upEveryone’s against meIt’s not (ever) my fault!My life is just a messLife is out of controlDo any of those sound familiar? The “victim-mentality” lens colors everything we see, every event and interaction, as something that’s happening “to us” - and not for our good.But, what happens when we wake up from victimhood? What happens when we discover that we are actually in control of our own thoughts, feelings, words and actions?Find out on today’s episode!Grace and peace, Chris

Have you ever played the “victim-card”? I’m sure that we all have at one time or another. Why? We’ve all been duped into believing some of the Lies Victims Tell Themselves. Here’s the deal, we all struggle with untrue recorded memos in our heads, whether about ourselves or other people, and those recordings are often set to repeat on endless loops. These untruths, or lies, that we tell ourselves usually manifest in two distinct ways: encouraging us to act as innocent victims or evil villains. Acting out, in either way, can be really unhealthy!On today’s episode, we’re going to take some time to examine our lives and make sure that we’re living authentically by learning to interrupt these distorted thought patterns. So, what’s the first step? We’ve got to recognize the lies holding us back from embracing the good life we’re meant to live! I’m sure you’re acquainted with at least a few of these:I’m not good enoughI’ll never measure upEveryone’s against meIt’s not (ever) my fault!My life is just a messLife is out of controlDo any of those sound familiar? The “victim-mentality” lens colors everything we see, every event and interaction, as something that’s happening “to us” - and not for our good.But, what happens when we wake up from victimhood? What happens when we discover that we are actually in control of our own thoughts, feelings, words and actions?Find out on today’s episode!Grace and peace, Chris

Ever get that sneaking suspicion that not everyone on the team is fully onboard with where you’re going as a company? It’s more common than you might think!Getting others to buy-in to your vision is a challenge, but it’s not impossible and it can be highly rewarding! Can you imagine what it would be like for your team to become fully engaged?There’s nothing like having your entire company owning the vision and running with it!Imagine the possibilities! But that’s not where most business owners are. Sadly, most struggle to “convince” their teams of the destination and the best way to get there. That’s what we want to discuss today. In this episode, Brian and Joel take a stab at what it takes to develop a culture of community and commitment around the goals you’ve set.Here’s the deal: if your team can’t see how they’re connected to the vision, they’ll be reluctant to own their part in it. It won’t make sense to them. And they won’t be able to help you achieve it.But, if they’re connected, committed, and cooperative then the sky’s the limit! Don’t miss this episode!Chris

No matter what industry your business is in, you’ve likely got customers or clients that you have to interact with. But, how do you know if you’re really connecting with them?Do you know their needs, wants, or desires? Sure, maybe you do your fair share of market research, but do you have a connection with your clients that goes beyond the statistics? Have you developed a relationship, as much as possible in your field, that helps you intuitively anticipate their needs, even their motives, for buying your products or hiring your services?For some business owners, a client can become little more than a number; a means to a profitable end. Well, hopefully profitable. But, in our experience, this approach backfires!If you’ve ever found yourself seeing clients this way, then it probably wasn’t too long before you discovered that the ends don’t justify the means, at least not in the long run. Your relationship with your customer is the primary lifeline you have to a healthy and profitable future. Here’s the deal: no matter what business you have, what product or service that you offer, “You are in the people business”, first and foremost. So, how do you create a culture of consistent care for clients in your business? And how can you effectively communicate that care - through your team - to your customers?On today’s episode, Joel and Brian take a deep dive into the motivation and methodology behind developing a stronger connection with your customer. Don’t miss this episode!Chris

You probably use some kind of Job Description in your recruiting and hiring processes, right? But, what are you using in order to keep your team members on track once they're on board? Maybe you’ve had your folks ask questions like: “Am I doing a good job”, “Am I doing the right things”, or “What would you want me to do differently”? These are great questions!But what they indicate is that your process is missing something important. Enter KRAs.Maintaining excellence, holding folks accountable to goals, and coaching them towards higher performance requires something more than just task lists and project assignments.That’s why we talk so much about KRAs, or Key Result Areas. In fact, we do tons of coaching and training along this line in order to help leaders discover the benefits of this tool.So, from time to time, we like to revisit this topic and tease out different aspects that we haven’t covered before, as well as help people to see what they’re missing out on.KRAs, which are sometimes referred to as Key Responsibility Areas, are a huge asset to leaders wanting to create a high performance culture on their teams. But not only that!While KRAs help define goals, they also provide the means to measure them. Remember, goals must be actionable, obtainable, and also quantifiable. That’s where Job Descriptions fail.Joined once again in the studio by Brian, we take a look at some of our own client’s questions and comments about using KRAs on their teams. We also address this question head-on, Why Can’t I Just Use A Job Description?What we discover may surprise you! Especially as we dig into the benefits that leaders receive from having to think through the vision and goals for each team member’s role. Enjoy today’s episode!Chris