The Asterios Feed Where Asterios Puts Things

Louis writes, "Dr. Strangelove, millennial edition." Seems simple enough! To get your own personal episode of The Five Minute Podcast, join up at Patreon.com/asterios [Feb '17: 038]

Ronnie F. writes, "We were all dumb kids, once. Tell us a story of a time that you were a kid and you screwed something up bigly." Oh, I know all about this... To get your own personal episode of The Five Minute Podcast, visit patreon.com/asterios [FEB '17: 048]

Adam writes, "A spaceship from Melmac crashes in your parent's backyard sometime just before Trump's inauguration. On your next visit to them, your dad picks you up from the airport. What's the conversation like on the ride home?" Uhm...ok! To get your own personal episode of The Five Minute Podcast, visit patreon.com/asterios [FEB '17: 036]

John writes, "What are some enemies of 20-something Megaman that didn't quite make the cut?" I'll tell ya! To get your own personal episode of The Five Minute Podcast, visit patreon.com/asterios [Feb '17: 059]

Kyle writes, "Asterios, pitch me 'Dexter Jettster: A Star Wars Story.'" Yer the boss, boss! To get your own personal episode of The Five Minute Podcast recorded just for you, every month, visit patreon.com/asterios [Feb '17: 060]

Michael writes, "On this day, five years ago, my great grandmother passed away. She was the first person to pass that I really cared about in my life. She introduced me to something great: Star Trek. During breaks from school, I'd visit her, and we'd watch TNG & DS9 late into the evening. My question: which is the superior product? Star Trek or Star Wars?" Oh, I'll settle this once and for all! To get your own personal episode of The Five Minute Podcast, visit patreon.com/asterios [JAN '17: 080]

Matthew F. writes, "As seen on TV! What As seen on TV products have you used? Which have you bought? What are your favorites? Your least favorites?" Oh, I've got some stories about this! To get your own personal episode of The Five Minute Podcast recorded just for you, visit patreon.com/asterios [Feb,17; 054]

Danny writes, "What's your favorite cereal mascot?" I'll tell you! To get your own personal episode of The Five Minute Podcast, visit patreon.com/asterios [FEB '17, 076]

James writes, "I need to know how much better the Marvel Cinematic Universe would be if every movie featured the Green Goblin from Spider Man 1 played by Willem Dafoe as the antagonist just flying around on his glider chucking bombs and screaming 'I BUILT THIS COMPANY' and 'AVENGE ME!'" You've come to the right place! To get your own personal episode of The Five Minute Podcast, visit patreon.com/asterios [Jan '17: 066]

Shannon writes, "Good news, Fox just called and they are creating a new sitcom "According to Asterios." Not only are you the lead role, but also head writer. The studio exec's are all high as balls on cocaine and don't seem to care what you put out as long as it's PG and runs for 50 minutes between re-runs of Dark Angel and Angel. What kind of sitcom would you put together under these circumstances? and who would you cast as co-stars. Sorry if this one's already been done, you the king Kokkinos." Let's dance! To get your own personal episode of The Five Minute Podcast, visit patreon.com/asterios [JAN '17: 020]

Ewan writes, "Yo Coconuts, I have no idea what I'm looking for in a 5mp this month, so hit me with a surprise - like, the best surprise you've ever had or something." OK! To get your own personal episode of The Five Minute Podcast, visit patreon.com/asterios [FEB '17: 077]

Natalie writes, "Please revisit the classic Star Trek: The Next Generation two-parter, "Best of Both Worlds." Gladly! To get your own personal episode of The Five Minute Podcast, visit patreon.com/asterios [JAN '17: 009]

Adam writes, "The Hackett Brothers, who are secret operatives for the US government, suspect that a foreign agent is monitoring them at Sandpiper Air." No probs! To get your own personal episode of The Five Minute Podcast, visit patreon.com/asterios [JAN '17: 013]

Joshua H. writes, "Tell me what would have happened in Harry Potter if Voldemort started conceal-carrying after the end of Order of the Phoenix?" Only one way to find out! To get your own personal episode of The Five Minute Podcast, visit patreon.com/asterios [Feb '17: 040]

Kenny J. writes, "Cernovich seducing Bigfoot. Bigfoot is totally black pilled or blue pilled or whatever that knuckle head thinks is the good one." Let's dance, Kenny! To get your own personal episode of The Five Minute Podcast, visit patreon.com/asterios [Feb '17: 067]