The Secret Lives of Men

Christopher Germer presents an exciting synthesis of mindfulness and self-compassion that is much needed. Drawing upon decades of practice as a clinician and meditator, Dr. Germer offers a rich and insightful guide to emotional healing. Germer shows readers how to use mindfulness and self-compassion to open up to their pain and treat themselves with kindness. Ideal for recommendation those who stuggle with issues of shame, guilt and self blame.   "The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion: Freeing Yourself from Destructive Thoughts and Emotions."  http://www.amazon.com/Mindful-Path-Self-Compassion-Yourself-Destructive/dp/1593859759/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1309455046&sr=1-1

Marriage Confidential: The Post-Romantic Age of Workhorse Wives, Royal Children, Undersexed Spouses, and Rebel Couples Who are Rewriting the Rules. Pamela Haag has written the generational "big book" on modern marriage, a mesmerizing, sometimes salacious look at the semi-happy ambivalence lurking just below the surface of many marriages today. The spouses may rarely fight—they may maintain a sincere affection for each other—but one or both may harbor a melancholy sense that something important is missing. Remarkably, this side of the marriage story hasn't been told or analyzed—until now. Meticulously researched and injected with insightful firsthand accounts and welcome doses of humor, Marriage Confidential articulates for a generation that grew up believing they would "have it all" why they have ended up disenchanted. Haag introduces us to contemporary marriages where spouses act more like life partners than lovers; children occupy an uncontested position at the center of the marital relationship; and even the romantic staples of sexual fidelity and passion are assailed from all sides—so much so that spouses can end up having affairs online almost by accident. Blending tales from the front lines of matrimony with cultural history, surveys, and research covert-ops (such as joining an online affair-finding site and posting a personal ad in the New York Review of Books), Haag paints a detailed picture of the state of marriage today. And to show what's possible as well as what's melancholy in our post-romantic age, Haag seeks out marriages with a twist—rebels who are quietly brainstorming and evolving the scripts around career, money, social life, child rearing, and sex. Provocative but sympathetic, forward-thinking and bold, here, at last, is a manifesto for living large in marriage.

In this original and deeply revealing exploration of the self and relationships, Dr. Jeffrey Rubin brings the art of flourishing to life. The idea is startlingly simple: self-care is the foundation of intimacy, and intimacy is the culmination of self-care. The Art of Flourishing provides the reader with the tools necessary to thrive, to live a life of meaning, passion, and fulfillment. An expert on both Eastern meditative and Western psychotherapeutic traditions, Dr. Rubin draws on the best practices of each to create a new and accessible path to living authentically. His unique synthesis provides a remarkably lucid guide for handling our emotions wisely, discovering our purpose, and uncovering barriers to intimacy—the hidden emotional weeds that kill passion, such as conflicts over communication and power, boundaries and sexuality. Drawing from case examples and personal experiences, Rubin explains how to remove these obstacles to nurture empathy and mutual respect. Creating and cultivating a garden of love enables us to grow as individuals and nourish our connections with others. It widens our horizon of possibility, deepens our humanity, and helps us flourish, which is a priceless gift to the world.

Every year, The Humane Society of the United States presents The Genesis Awards paying tribute to the major news and entertainment media for producing outstanding works that raise public awareness of animal issues. The Elephant in the Living Room won the best documentary. The Elephant in the Living Room is a documentary film about the controversial American subculture of raising the most dangerous animals in the world as common household pets. Director Michael Webber follows the journey of two men at the heart of the issue. One, Tim Harrison, a man whose mission is to protect exotic animals and the public, and the other, Terry Brumfield, a big-hearted man who struggles to keep his two pet African lions that he loves like his own family.

In the classic bestseller His Needs, Her Needs, Willard F. Harley, Jr., identifies the ten most vital needs of men and women and shows husbands and wives how to satisfy those needs in their spouses. He provides guidance for becoming irresistible to your spouse and for loving more creatively and sensitively, thereby eliminating the problems that often lead to extramarital affairs. This revised and expanded edition has been updated throughout and includes new writing that highlights the special significance of intimate emotional needs in marriage.

Broadcasting live from Canada this week, we visit with Rick Goodwin Director of "The Men's Project." The Men's Project is a non-profit charitable men's counselling agency that has been providing services to men and their families since 1997.The men's Project provides individual and couple counseling, as well as a specialized healing program for men who have experienced sexual or physical abuse as children, anger management, emotional intelligence and fathering.The services are specifically designed for men and professionally facilitated by accredited psychotherapists.

Simply Imperfect: Revisiting the Wabi-Sabi House. Wabi-sabi is about appreciating the simple and letting go of the superficial—the perfect antidote for a society in recovery from a decades-long consumerist binge. In 2004 The Wabi-Sabi House helped popularize this ancient Japanese philosophy in North America. Simply Imperfect is a fully revised and updated edition of The Wabi-Sabi House aimed at moving past our belief in life, liberty, and the pursuit of stuff to finding beauty in austerity, serenity, and authenticity.Far more than home decor, wabi-sabi is a state of mind: living modestly in the moment, stripping away the unnecessary, and finding satisfaction in everyday things. Simply Imperfect recounts wabi-sabi's rich history, tracing it from its Zen Buddhist roots through to the present day. This beautifully-illustrated book reveals ways to introduce wabi-sabi into your home such as:Clearing clutter and blocking noiseIntegrating salvaged and recycled materials Making and growing things yourself (or supporting local artisans who do)Taking time and space for self-reflectionWabi-sabi is everything that today's sleek, plastic, technology-saturated culture isn't. Simply Imperfect asks readers to see that mass-produced perfection is seductive but boring. This gentle book is for anyone who is overwhelmed by consumerism or whose focus has shifted from getting more to getting by.Robyn Griggs Lawrence is editor-in-chief of Natural Home magazine and a prolific writer and speaker on topics ranging from green building and ecological design to organic gardening. She has been instrumental in introducing the Japanese philosophy of wabi-sabi to a Western audience.

The Knowledge Every Man Needs for a Successful Divorce Each year 500,000 men will face divorce, and most of them make at least one crucial—and often irreversible—mistake. These errors might seem minor, such as moving out while things get sorted out, or thinking of “temporary” orders as being truly temporary. But when they get to court, these men discover they have put themselves in a terrible position. They may have to give up their house, pay impossibly high alimony, or even lose custody.You could be one of these men. But you don’t have to be. Joseph Cordell, the founder of the nation’s largest law firm focusing on men’s divorce and the creator of DadsDivorce.com, has seen the consequences of the mistakes men make. Drawing upon the huge number of cases that Cordell & Cordell has handled, this book identifies the 10 most common mistakes that end up hurting men in divorce. Cordell demystifies the divorce process, explains what judges consider in making their final decisions, and lays out a road map for positive actions men can take to achieve the best possible outcome. No man should face divorce without this book.

Early American writer and philosopher, Elbert Hubbard, said, “My father always used to say that when you die, if you’ve got five real friends, you’ve had a great life.” Five Friends is the story of how one man sought to live that life. Beautifully shot, from the mountains of Southern California to the New England coastline, Five Friends captures the intimate relationships of a 65-year-old man and his five friends as they reflect on their lives together, support each other in personal struggle and mine the depths of meaningful friendship. Success, conflict, marriage, divorce, fatherhood, children and dying. These men reveal their fears and dreams to one another in a profound exploration of vulnerability and transparency among men. From touching moments to horrific tragedy and darkness, the spectrum of human emotion colors this breathtaking portrait.

Terrell reprises the warts-and-all portrait of the mercurial Steve McQueen, aided by 32 pages of intimate photographs. Building on the foundation of his 1993 Steve McQueen: Portrait of an American Rebel, he delves into the actor's turbulent childhood with an alcoholic, free-loving mother and an absentee father, making for a combustible personality, constantly fighting for his sense of self, not trusting easily, and becoming an at-risk teen in trouble with the law. After a stint with the Marines, McQueen broke on the New York theater scene with an Actors Studio pedigree, a highly rated TV series, and a collection of blockbuster films including The Magnificent Seven, The Great Escape, The Getaway, and Bullitt.

Skyrocketing phone bills. Layovers and missed flights. Countless hours spent pining, worrying, and wondering, Why do we do this to ourselves? Long-distance love can be one challenge afteranother, but as most committed couples will tell you, the rewards well outweigh the stresses. In this sensitive yet sensible guide, long-distance veterans Chris and Kate provide strategies for making the distance seem shorter and outline eight essential skills for relationship success:Communicating effectively. establishing mutual goals and expectations dealing with issues of trust, fidelity, and independence, having fun in spite of the distance Managing time, schedules, and stress Keeping the relationship real, balancing sex and emotional intimacy, making the transition to same-city livingBased on interviews with more than 100 couples and packed with knowledgeable tips and honest advice, THE LONG-DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP SURVIVAL GUIDE proves that, with patience and dedication, a loving relationship can not only survive but also thrive across the miles.

University of Chicago research psychologist Cacioppo shows in studies that loneliness can be harmful to our overall well-being. Loneliness, he says, impairs the ability to feel trust and affection, and people who lack emotional intimacy are less able to exercise good judgment in socially ambiguous situations; this makes them more vulnerable to bullying as children and exploitation by unscrupulous salespeople in old age. But Cacioppo and Patrick (editor of the Journal of Life Sciences) want primarily to apply evolutionary psychology to explain how our brains have become hard-wired to have regular contact with others to aid survival. So intense is the need to connect, say the authors, that isolated individuals sometimes form parasocial relations with pets or TV characters.

According to psychotherapist David Richo, all the major relationship struggles are fundamentally trust issues, whether it’s fear of commitment, fear of abandonment, communication problems, jealousy, or a tendency to be controlling. In Daring to Trust, he explores the importance of trust throughout our emotional lives: how it develops in childhood and how it becomes an essential aspect of healthy adult relationships. Richo emphasizes that developing trust in others begins by developing true trust in ourselves—in our feelings, our body, and in our inner voice—and he offers practical exercises for exploring and enhancing our sense of trust. David Richo, PhD, is a therapist and author who leads popular workshops on personal and spiritual growth. He is known for drawing on Buddhist thought, poetry, and Jungian perspectives in his work. He is the author of How to Be an Adult in Relationships and The Five Things We Cannot Change. He lives in Santa Barbara and San Francisco, California.

Named by Harold Bloom as one of the most significant American novelists of our time, Cormac McCarthy has been honored with the National Book Award and the National Book Critics Circle Award for All the Pretty Horses, the James Tait Black Memorial Prize and the Pulitzer Prize for The Road, and the coveted MacArthur Fellowship. Steven Frye offers a comprehensive treatment of McCarthy’s fiction to date, dealing with the author’s aesthetic and thematic concerns, his philosophical and religious influences, and his participation in Western literary traditions. Frye provides extensive readings of each novel, charting the trajectory of McCarthy’s development as a writer who invigorates literary culture both past and present through a blend of participation, influence, and aesthetic transformation. Frye provides scholars, students, and general readers alike with a clearly argued foundational examination of McCarthy’s novels in their historical and literary contexts as an ideal roadmap illuminating the author’s work as it charts the dark and mythic topography of the American frontier.

Which comes first--war or masculinity? The complex and shifting relationship between the two is the subject of this provocative selection, which reads as both military history and an exploration of gender. Leo Braudy is interested in what it is to be a man, particularly in wartime, and how the technological evolution of warfare has altered what makes a male a man. Understanding masculine sexual identity is the key, he argues, particularly in the early modern period, when stirrings of female emancipation led to fear of impotence and inadequacy, while gunpowder simultaneously blew battlefield honor into new forms. Pirates, cowboys, adventurers, and sports figures all emerge as the modern world's masculine archetypes, and manliness in combat becomes a new way of coping with the madness of war.