Pressing Pause

Feeling like you couldn’t cope if things went wrong, is a fear overthinkers share. It’s behind a lot of the What If-ing and the need to overplan and be in control at all times. There’s a skill we can all develop and strengthen to help us feel able to cope – resilience. In this episode we look at: • How the fear of not being able to deal with life keeps us scared of life • What resilience is • How being resilient reduces overthinking • Different ways we can build and strengthen our own r

Wanting to please people, to be kind or helpful, isn’t in itself a bad thing. But when your desire to please others, make them happy and life you interferes with how you live your life, it’s no longer kind or helpful to yourself. In this episode we look at: • What’s behind people-pleasing • What it looks like • Why it doesn’t have to be pleasing everybody or nobody • How to be compassionate and supportive to others AND to yourself too

To some the idea that you’d be afraid to feel happy sounds absurd but not to the overthinker. The fear of being utterly content and joy-filled is real because it’s accompanied by the thought of what if this all goes away? In this episode we look at: • Why we feel so scared to be happy • How we think we’re protecting ourselves by reining in how joyful we feel • What foreboding joy is really doing • What we can do to allow ourselves to release the fear and feel the joy we want to

We all experience change throughout our lives but that may not stop us overthinking and resisting it. How can we cope with change better so that it causes us less upset, grief and stress? In this episode we look at: • When we can influence imminent change and when it’s out of our control • What we can learn from changes we’ve already experienced • How we can take care of ourselves when change feels challenging • Five actions we can take to make change feel less stressful

We give ourselves messages all the time, often negative ones, through our internal monologue so why not harness these powerful messages to help ourselves build self-belief? In this episode we look at: • The belief statements or affirmations you already use, even if you haven’t realised it • How to create new powerful, positive belief statements • What affirmations can and can’t do for you • How to use affirmations or belief statements in daily life

Being busy has become our default but why are we so busy? What does it mean for our self-worth if we’re busy or, if we’re not? What impact does our busyness have on us and what can we do to reduce our busyness and increase the joy we feel? In this episode we look at: • What fears lie behind our busyness • The ‘little’ ways we make our lives busier • The difference between real work and busy work • Five steps we can take to be less busy and enjoy life more

A fear of failure can take on different disguises including perfectionism and procrastination, it can stop us from doing what we want and realising our full potential, and knowing how to deal with it can be incredibly tricky. In this episode we look at: • Why being scared of failure feeling different to when we fail • How it can show up for each of us • My own fear of failure (this makes me feel pretty vulnerable!) • The process we can work through to help ourselves

My overthinking coaching clients often talk about their lack of confidence. It’s a big topic to cover so in this episode I focus on how our body language can help us to feel more confident. In this episode we look at: • How our posture affects how we feel • Social psychologist Amy Cuddy’s research on the effects of dominance and stress hormones • What you can try in two minutes to boost your confidence • How finding your own musical anthem can bump up your confidence levels

It can feel like you’re being bombarded with suggestions on how to make this your best year yet so what you can do to deal with the pressure of January-itis? In this episode we look at: • What you’re telling yourself about these new year new you messages • The role of that pesky ‘should’ word • The idea behind choosing a word for the year • How to make it helpful and supportive, not a pressure or source of guilt

The festive season can be fun and joyous and it can also be messy and stressful. In this episode I suggest seven ideas for creating a calmer Christmas and New Year. In this episode we look at: • How your expectations impact your enjoyment of Christmas • What small, practical actions you can take to ease the stress • What to do if you don’t feel full of Christmas spirit • How to make the most of the good stuff

Being away from home, however lovely a place you’re staying in or however lovely the people are, it can bring up feelings of vulnerability, stress and worry. Creating a sense of home from home can help you to feel more relaxed and comfortable. In this episode we look at: • Why we can struggle when we’re away from home • The practical action we can take, whatever the circumstances, to help ourselves feel more calm, secure and present • I share how I create my own sense of home away from home

As Christmas is only a couple of weeks away, and it’s a time when we can be spending money more than usual, I look at the relationship between money and happiness. In this episode we look at: • How much money is enough to make you happy • How we can spend it to increase the joy we feel • Who and what we spend our money on will have a longer lasting impact on our happiness

The mindset with which we approach challenges or difficulties in life can make us feel stuck or it can open us up to possibilities. While some of us may begin life with a predominantly fixed mindset there is one little word that can help us move to a growth mindset. In this episode we look at: • What fixed and growth mindsets are from the leading authority on them • How focusing on our ability or effort affects our mindset • The one little word that can make all the difference and how to use it

How you feel about the expectations you have of life affects how positive or negative your reality is. Even if you feel you’re naturally pessimistic there are actions you can take to cultivate optimism and improve the reality of daily life. In this episode we look at: • A study that shows how your expectations impact how you feel and behave • How your optimistic or pessimistic attitude changes how you see the world but not reality itself • Seven actions you can take to cultivate optimism

There’s one particular time of year when it feels like we’re not allowed to feel what we’re feeling, to take care of our own needs as well as everyone else’s, and to suggest that things could be done differently. In this episode we look at: • The lack of permission we can feel at Christmas • How others could be feeling as we do but also think they’re not allowed to speak up • Why your feelings and needs matter as much as anyone else’s • How to start voicing your opinion and factorin