Robot Pizza Van, Funny News

A rat eats $19,000 in cash, memory is transferred between two snails, meat scented candles, and a kid is cleaning up the ocean. Special appearance by Mathman. A rat got into an ATM machine and nibbles all the bills. Find out how you can tell if rats have eaten YOUR money. Then, scientists transfer the memory of one snail to the mind of another snail. We also look at the hottest new condiment merchandising - meat scented candles (I forgot these are candles and I've been eating them). Finally as in the final story, but also finally as in after a long delay, a kid has invented a way to clean the plastic from the ocean. Music by Uncle Milk and also ChaosMusic For more visit www.robotpizzavan.com Support the show at www.patreon.com/robotpizzavan @robotpizzavan on Twitter www.facebook.com/robotpizzavan

Some drivers intentionally hit turtles. Leonidas of Rhodes holds an Olympic record for around 2,000 years, until recently. A severed rattlesnake head bites a man. A wolf-like creature is discovered in Montana. Is it the Game of Thrones dire wolf? A poor little squirrel was rescued from his overgrown teeth. Mid-year resolutions. Justin Trudeau's left eyebrow has gone off the hook and other strange video artifacts. Music by Uncle Milk For more visit www.robotpizzavan.com Friends of the van support the show at www.patreon.com/robotpizzavan @robotpizzavan on Twitter www.facebook.com/robotpizzavan

Some guy is selling a hot dog in a bottle of water, Hot Dog Water. Scientists found a 99 million year old frog that was trapped in amber, along with the beetle that the frog was about to eat. Cloning woolly mammoths? We'll get around to it. You know those tiny bottles of alcohol? A truckload of them spilled on a highway. Earlier it was a truckload of spaghetti sauce. Before that it was bourbon and before that it was frozen pizzas. All spilled on highways... in the same state. Bring silverware if your going on a road trip. This week's feel good story... someone invented a gravity electric generator. Music by Uncle Milk and The Zombie Dandies. Follow us wherever you listen to podcasts. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/robot-pizza-van-funny-news/id1212719431?mt=2 www.robotpizzavan.com www.facebook.com/robotpizzavan @robotpizzavan on Twitter

Robot Pizza Van reads the entire internet and tells you about the funny things. This week's special guest, author and artist... David Bright. What do we talk about this week? A pile of onions out in the desert. A snake causes a power outage. A robot dog's funeral. A celebration that causes an artificial earthquake. A company that will pay any fines that kids get for running a lemonade stand. Music by Uncle Milk Follow us wherever you listen to podcasts. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/robot-pizza-van-funny-news/id1212719431?mt=2 www.robotpizzavan.com www.facebook.com/robotpizzavan @robotpizzavan on Twitter

Here's some things. To qualify for an internship at one of the world's largest candy company you have to identify every Skittle flavor blindfolded. Changing the subject, there is an iPhone case that doubles as a 20 pound dumbbell so you can... I don't know. But hey, here's a different thing... sharks will listen to jazz if you give them food and there's a restaurant that gives it's patrons water pistols to fight off the seagulls. Which reminds me... there's a bar that serves a drink with an unusual ingredient... ok I'll tell you what it is... it's a person's toe. And never start a sentence with the word 'and' but nonetheless... Pork roll flavored ice cream. Music by Uncle Milk Follow us wherever you listen to podcasts. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/robot-pizza-van-funny-news/id1212719431?mt=2 www.robotpizzavan.com www.facebook.com/robotpizzavan @robotpizzavan on Twitter

A robot is running for Mayor, we listen to a few audio illusions, Seattle mussels test positive for opioids, the police use a dead man's finger to unlock a phone, and Somebody Spilled Something Somewhere. Music by Uncle Milk and The Zombie Dandies. Follow us wherever you listen to podcasts. https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/robot-pizza-van-funny-news/id1212719431?mt=2 www.robotpizzavan.com www.facebook.com/robotpizzavan @robotpizzavan on Twitter

Each week we read the entire internet and then tell you about the funny parts. This week find out which letters are in a can of alphabet spaghetti and if it spells anything. Then a gun is discovered sticking out of a car's bumper, science has a new theory as to why ice is slippery, a duck is caught speeding, and there is a new joggling world record. Still 99% politics free and it would have been 100 except that I mentioned the word politics twice now. Music by Uncle Milk and The Zombie Dandies Follow us wherever you listen to podcasts. www.robotpizzavan.com www.facebook.com/robotpizzavan @robotpizzavan on Twitter

An accidental zombie alert goes out over the public emergency system... again. If they keep doing this then when the real zombies come nobody is going to believe it. We've got a classic case of 'the boy who cried zombie'. Also, a woman claims that Oreo never paid a prize that she won. Then, New York is running out of Cheetos. And finally, an $85 million dollar apt comes with trip to space and other anemones... enemies...amenities! These are the newses! Music by Uncle Milk Follow us wherever you listen to podcasts. www.robotpizzavan.com www.facebook.com/robotpizzavan @robotpizzavan on Twitter robotpizzavan@gmail.com

Phone booth stuffing was an attempt to see how many people could fit inside of a phone booth. Phone booth stuffing also sounds like it could be a side dish at a the AT&T company picnic. Before that, we get a voicemail about weird and mysterious voicemails from the 'What The Podcast' (https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/what-the-podcast/id1349582735?mt=2). And before both of those two other things we discover that it takes a lot of work to create a polished aluminum foil ball. And finally, before...after everything else, the tiny tooth sensor that's taking your mouth by storm. Music by Uncle Milk Follow us where you listen to podcasts. www.robotpizzavan.com www.facebook.com/robotpizzavan @robotpizzavan on Twitter robotpizzavan@gmail.com

Offroad, Rygar and Borg read the entire internet to find the newsiest stories for you. This week… why haven't aliens visited earth, zombie raccoons, a man waters a plant for his late wife, and exploding ants. Also today, for the first time, we learn the name of Borg’s pet fly. Music by Uncle Milk Follow us and share www.robotpizzavan.com www.facebook.com/robotpizzavan @robotpizzavan on Twitter robotpizzavan@gmail.com

Hey, this time… The typo that won the war, a 44 Furby organ, robot strippers, and other things. Ok, the other things are... a paper airplane folding machine, some of Yoko Ono's art was stolen, a student that works around the phone ban, and ladies and gentleman, today we meet Borg's pet fly. Music by Uncle Milk For more visit www.robotpizzavan.com @robotpizzavan on Twitter www.facebook.com/robotpizzavan

This week... The .5k race for underachievers... Selfie monkey loses in court... A woman is fined $500 for an apple... A man attacked by a shark, mauled by a bear and bit by a snake... And more... news! 'What The Podcast' left us a voice mail about new developments with the AI Robot named Sophia. Check out their show about paranormal and conspiracy stuff on iTunes or SoundCloud - https://soundcloud.com/what-the-podcast Music by Uncle Milk For more visit www.robotpizzavan.com Friends of the van support the show at www.patreon.com/robotpizzavan @robotpizzavan on Twitter www.facebook.com/robotpizzavan

Platypus milk can save the world, a new human organ has been discovered, and slices of ketchup. Platypus milk has a newly discovered type of antibiotic property that could help us if all the germs became immune to our current antibiotics. And... scientists discovered a new organ in the human body that acts like a shock absorber for your bones and muscles. How did they overlook this before? And, and... a company is on Kickstarter funding slices of ketchup and other condiments. Music by Uncle Milk For more visit www.robotpizzavan.com Follow on Twitter @robotpizzavan

You want to hear the news that they're not telling you, the news that has been hidden from your eyes thirsty for the quenching refreshment of truth. Thirsty eyes. The most important information has been hidden in plain sight, in the guise of seemingly random, silly and weird news stories. Here's what I found this week - The slowest roller coaster completely stops in the middle of a ride and no one noticed. A man builds his own steam powered rocket so he can launch it high enough to see whether the Earth is flat or not. Gold is reported to have been falling from the sky in Russia. Those are the incredibly relevant news stories that we cover this week. Music by Uncle Milk For more visit www.robotpizzavan.com @robotpizzavan

What do robots that work alongside people, cars that transform into other things, and government propaganda have in common? No, I'm asking you. I don't know. Music by Uncle Milk For more visit www.robotpizzavan.com @robotpizzavan