The Rules of Acquisition: A Star Trek Deep Space Nine Podcast

It’s the final countdown y’all.  Worf gets lost. Sisko gets some land and also engaged.  Plus there's a war on. They’ve dabbled with serialization, how does DS9 kick off the longest arc any Star Trek had attempted?  What approach did the writers take to assembling the story?  It's all led up to this!

In times of war the law falls silent. WE DO NOT.  Julian is contacted by Section 31 to run some spy shenanigans at a conference.  We end up discussing more than just this episode, and trying to decipher if DS9 overall is portraying a hard moral philosophy.

We got holodeck shenanigans. Sisko has good reason to not want to go to not visit the 60s.  We revisit the career of beloved actor Mike Starr. Waitaminute. Do people not like Vic?  Finally: An episode not based on an old movie, right? Nope definitely not this one...

Odo meets one of his people, and their intimate relationship causes some tension with Kira. Sex vibes for days. 

A killer is on the loose, but does it take a killer to catch a - oh this is something we've seen before. What is the bad part of this episode?  Is there any part of it that isn’t just a take on Silence of the Lambs? 

The Nagus is Missing in the Alternate Universe and Quark and Rom need a cloaking device for the Regent. It’s the final Mirror Universe episode of Deep Space Nine, and we couldn’t be more upset.    Two of our favorite things. The Mirror Universe PLUS Ferengi shenanigans!  Get ready to talk about evil bisexual tropes.   Hugh was right about problems in the mirror U since season its first reappearance in DS9.  Now in Discovery they’re still doing it.  How many episodes are going to start with “we haven’t heard from X in a while”?  Did this do some interesting things with Ferengi religion and spirituality?  Is Quarks horniness more character assassination?  Which is the best Mirror ep? Aside from the original. Oh sorry, “Alternate.”  Is this show making fun of its fans?  Does it have senoritus.  Remember “Vulcan Love Slave”?  Remember all the coworkers’ doubles that Sisko slept with?  How bout that object work from Max and Armin?  What did it take to carry an invisible object?     Wait wait wait. Not-Hologram-Vic and Sloth Plisken?  ISB, Boogie Nights, and Zach Snyder.  Did The Last Jedi rip off a character from this ep?  One thing James didn’t hate about this episode: Brunt. Tugging on ear hairs: Ferengi sex is gross.    You take care of your Nagus. It’s just what you do: Anarcho Capitalists love for authoritarianism.     Hey, Andrew Robinson was in this. Why aren’t we seeing more Avery Brooks lately?   Just how intimidating is he?    Why again, do we want to go to the Mirror -sorry “Alternate”-Universe?  Did it lose the original thread?  Do people want Benny Hill shenanigans?  Get ready for our new podcast!  What is Kira going to do to the Regent that’s so stimulating?  Thanks Joel Esterhaus, for the 90s obsession with sexy domination.    James has a second nice thing to say; this time about Nicole DeBoer.  If they know this is the last season why isn’t the show closing doors?  Back to sexual politics and harmful tropes.  Apropos of nothing:  Tilda Swinton is great.  What do we think about comedy in these things?  Stay tuned for Yakkity Saxuality!    Let us know what you think! Give us a call or contact us by whatever means you like 917 408 3898https://twitter.com/kickerspodcasts And check out the Kickers of Elves patreon at  https://patreon.com/kickersofelves  

O'Brien is missing from Deep Space Nine, and also from most of this episode.  To find him Ezri must go home to face her family and the ... the toxic effects of capitalism? The sequel that definitely nobody asked for.   

Nog has some very understandable issues to deal with.  Maybe we do too? Is this the best holodeck episode ever?  Is that damning with faint praise?  What makes a holodeck episode anyway?  Oh Vic. OH  MY, how some people hate you.

Hey remember how cults were all the rage in the 90s?  Kira Nerys does.  Should she be more ready to disengage from Dukat's tiresome shenanigans at this point? 

War is hell.  Sisko and crew get put in the middle of it. What does the end of History and the 90s have to do with this episode?  WELL WE’RE GONNA TALK ABOUT IT.

You guys, Martok HATES Kor. When Kor shows up at Worf's drunk in the middle of the night and asks him to do a favor so he can die with dignity, what is a bro supposed to do? Progressive Left vs the old liberals: Worf is Peter Daou.  This 90s show is all about post Trump politics, right? 

What happens in this episode? [See title of episode] The final installment  of the Ferengi Pickers Cycle.  Kira’s boyfriend also gets an interesting story!  Does DS9 actually do faith ok in this episode? 

One Flew Back to the Cuckoo's Nest. Do Re OH NO. Julian brings a patient out of a catatonic state and what's the first thing he does after?   Julian. Your ethics, man.

A haughty Vulcan challenges the emotional Sisko to a game of baseball and we got us a shenanigans episode, y'all! But what's this about an ethnoship? Take me out, please.

Does Ezri Dax even want to be on Deep Space Nine?  Well of course she does, but the show needs an episode to integrate a counselor into station life.  Garak and Worf especially have some issues to deal with.  Is season 7 back on track? James wants more punch from the scripts.  Are James and Hugh overly demanding?  Bashir: That Staring Guy.  For a brief scene it turns into a John Hugh’s movie.  How was the script thrown a curveball by the later casting?  Is new Dax a manic pixie?  Does Sisko misuse Starfleet shenanigans to promote someone who isn’t ready?  Wait. Do counselors have medical degrees?  Does Sisko need more grief counselling?     What works about Ezri and how could they have gone further differentiating the character?  Bee Arthur Dax!  “This Delta VIP lounge, where I died.” Why would you fight the lionizing battle of an unjust war perpetrated for empire?  Gross Quark and Julian is gross.  Is Garak more normal than he used to be?  How weird is Sisko again?   Does it take for granted the Dax/Sisko relationship more than we do?  Oops, Garak broke again. Hugh loves ear sex stuff.  Were we lacking more of Worf’s perspective?  How might his story have been milked differently?  New trope! Worf has a problem? Get the bloodwine, O’brien!  What happened to cagey Garak?   Does DS9 sacrifice character for story?  Does Andrew Robinson rise above it?   Reptile brain.    NOT based on an old movie? How about that?    Odo and Kira:  Creepy old couple.  Have we said they need women on the writers staff?  How would Shondaland have made this work emotionally?  James has a “How would we fix it?” to repair the last scene with Dax and Worf?  How are we approaching DS9 now that we’re older?  How much have we aged or changed  since the podcast began? Give us a call to let us know what you think about the show.  The robot voice is getting weird. 917 847 5682 or join the Kickers of Elves patreon! https://patreon.com/kickersofelves