Limited Appeal

This week we'll rush through things, because T-bone needs to shower off before meeting his male friend. John's leg-ass slapping makes Warren think about two-headed dogs for some reason. Then John relates his own dogging story, which involves all kinds of water sports. As usual, the amusement comes at John's expense. Then we make a decision tree concerning what a dog should do towards objects that smell like other dogs. Finally, Warren reminds everyone about the sex habits of Luc's dog. Have you ever used ropes in sex play? If yes, you might want to meet Relic. Email us to set it up (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

In case you were expecting us to have a few episodes without talking about defecating, this is what you get. In this week's Urban Legend, Warren exposes the truth about cats, milk, and diarrhoea. If you have a cat you might be disturbed to learn about what is best for it. Then Luc describes one of the (many) seminars he has seen about poop. In this case, he describes a lion scat full of quills from the porcupine he had eaten. Ouch! Why didn't he just eat meat? Finally, T-bone reveals a frightening but amusing lack of understanding about excretory physiology. If you work for the Ex-Lax company, please explain your brand name to us via email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

After John spanks T-bone and threatens to get out the genital cuff, Warren asks us whether Bob Saget has gone nuts as a way of psychologically coping with the Full House days. Listen and you might find out why Bob Saget got the part and whether James Earl Jones was involved. Then in a new Good Idea/Bad Idea segment, Warren asks us to consider the ethics of provoking seizures and migraines in epilectics. Is it morally equivalent to exploiting or decapacitating the deaf? These are important problems, even if decapacitate was not a word until just now. If you can help John and his bugs with some directions, let us know by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

In this week's nature walk, Warren, uses a racial slur that he learned from a DJ, and then offends the French for good measure! Can you come up with a better slur for Belgian colonialists than us? Probably. Send them to us by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Anyway, Warren finally gets round to telling us about macaques, and their high mating frequencies. Then Luc explains what he knows about lion sex, and why it's better to share if you're a male lion, and why females might prefer to be homosexual. Naturally, this leads to reacharound talk. What else were you expecting? Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Luc starts this week's episode wondering about going through life talking like a fourth grader writing an exam. Warren tries it out, but has some troubles. Then we move into our "What would it take" segment, where we discuss what it would take for us to shave off all of our body hair. This leads us into a discussion of pricing of ass hair removal, which T-bone seems to know a lot about... most likely because of all his hottub adventures. Tell us about some of your hottub adventures at maskedman@limitedappeal.net.

Do you know the adjective form of the word adjective? It's like "deer", or something. If that's not clear, have a listen and you'll soon figure it out, maybe. Then join us on a nature walk, where we'll discuss tuna recruitment. Sign up today! You'll be treated to a riveting discussion of aquaculture and stem cells. Listen and see if anyone mentions salmon before Warren, or if he's cheaply trying to excuse a musical interlude. Finally, the conversation degrades (as you might have predicted) into talk about John releasing clouds of ejaculate on the side of the road. Luc tries to rerail the discussion by bringing up sneaky fuckers, which makes John wonder why the big dude doesn't notice a massive cloud of foreign sperm whenever he mates. If you can explain this as a sneaker, an alpha male, or a female mimic, please send us an email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

This week we find ourselves back on a Nature Walk when Warren asks if there is an Animal Kingdom equivalent to a strip club. This leads to the surprisingly contested revelation that most animals don't wear clothes, since that appears to be required for stripping, unless of course you include sheep that shear themselves. Those sexy sheep are asking for it! Then T-bone points out that dogs with coats are really just accentuating their nude bottom halves. Disturbing, eh? It's even more disturbing when you realize that their owners are responsible for this emphasis of the genitals. Finally, Luc presents a little natural history that is promptly and predictably distorted. Do you think peacocks are more likely to attend a brothel or a strip club? Let us know by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

We open with lots of dramatic music to emphasize the exciting nature of this episode. We return to the Superhero's Phone Booth to discuss a Romanian superhero: Pumaman! Don't be terrified, because Pumaman only uses his Puma-abilities, death-feigning skills, and confusing nomenclature for non-evil purposes. Does this guy remind you of Manimal? Us too. It might even have been the same show. Then we learn that there are lots of words for pumas. How many can you come up with? Finally, Warren reveals the weakness in Pumaman's death feigning ability, which is a total lack of control over when it happens and how long it lasts. If you can think of any way that fainting would be effective against shit-throwing gorillas or other villains, email us (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

The image for T-bone's Skype profile gets us talking about boobs and defensive eye position (except in water, which is a totally different ball park, of course). For those of you who didn't know the relationship between boobs and predation, you're welcome. In Foody Goody, we present part 3 of round 2 of What Am I Eating (Liquid Edition). See if you can guess what Warren is drinking (and to whom) based on very few audio clues! If you don't care, that probably reflects a healthy perspective on what is important, and what is ridiculously pointless. Assuming you can be bothered, feel free to email us to express your indifference (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Warren kicks off the week by announcing his upcoming trip to Florida, which initiates a brainstorming session in which we try to avoid copyright infringement regarding the behaviour of drunken women at spring break and their boobs. Then in Pooh Corner, Luc asks what the world should do to compensate for the mistreatment of homosexuals during the holocaust. Says, our suggestion is likely to offend almost everyone, even though, contrary to Warren's first impression, we're NOT suggesting the rounding-up of anyone. The result really would be like Cape Cod, but with show tunes! If you want to support our idea, send us an email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

This evening, we bring you some tomato-flavoured muffcake. Warren uses the Rotten Tomatoes scale to determine the "best" song in the world, or at least the song that the most people did not find objectionable. But John quickly fucks up Warren's candidate. Is this a good way to categorize things? Tell us whether you think the rotten tomatoes scale is objectionable or not by giving it a thumbs up or down, and sending it to our email address (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). In Foody Goody, we decide what the difference is between a muffin and a cupcake. This turns out to be a very touchy subject, mainly because John is a testy bitch. Nevertheless, we finally agree on the difference. Listen to hear about our long-awaited solution to this important problem! Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

This week's superhero's phone booth is filled with a sultry girl gorilla. Would it even get to the point where she gets shit thrown at her? Turns out she's got large breasts. Does that change anything? A swollen ass? A G-string? No? Well, then you and Warren don't share tastes in sultry gorillas. Next, Warren insists we all know the song by ZZ Top, She's Got Legs. What is the feminine version of the line, "She's got legs, she knows how to use them"? I'm sure you have better ideas than we do. Let us know via email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

In this week's Polish the Bishop segment, Warren asks us to change an existing euphemism so that it refers to something less offensive than it currently does. He probably wants to avoid having to think about the horrific behaviour involved in the current definition, but ironically, he just succeeds in burning some imagery into the rest of us (and you too, if you dare to listen). Fucker. What is the preferred way to serve chopped up penises? Send your recipes by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Then T-bone suggests that the chili dog is mainly for people who have sex with their enemies. Luc realizes (far too late) that the segment has gone terribly wrong. You'll probably agree whether or not you manage to listen to the whole episode. Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

We launch this week with an especially exasperating version of a Name 5 Things/Foody Goody crossover, in which Warren asks us to name 5 animals other than a pig from which one can obtain bacon, given that the definition of bacon is "a side of a pig, cured and smoked". Doesn't that sound riveting? Well maybe not, but I haven't even started to describe the undiscovered (until now) linguistic and anatomical problems involved in this. Be prepared, as we loosen a few definitions, among other things. If you know whether turkey fat is healthy or not, let us know via email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

We begin this episode by discovering how hard it is to replace every single "u" in any word with "me". It's trme, even if it is infmeriating. Then we ask why Sm-me-rfs are bl-me. OK, fuck it, we ask why Smurfs are blue (perhaps for the second time). Is their singing just a cover for village wide depression, or are they not getting enough oxygen? And is their size related to the presence of lungs? This topic gets Luc angry about insect-related liberties taken by Hollywood over the years, including the male-ness of the protagonist in Seinfeld's Bee Movie. Warren decides this issue requires us to deliver another ultimatum, which is as pointless as ever. If, in your standing as a spokesbee, you wish to clarify your shoe-wearing status, send us an email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.