Real Talk For Real Teachers with Dr. Becky Bailey

Conscious Discipline is intended for all children and adults. However, it can be especially powerful for children with exceptionalities, including autism. The practice of Conscious Discipline creates structure and safety, builds connection with even the most relationship-resistant children, and helps develop executive skills in children who may have deficits in that area. In this episode, Master Instructor Elizabeth Montero-Cefalo shares insights and strategies for maximizing the effectiveness of Conscious Discipline with children on the spectrum. Elizabeth has worked extensively with children with special needs. Her special needs classroom has been recognized as a Conscious Discipline model by Dr. Becky Bailey and Miami-Dade County Public Schools. Listen as Elizabeth provides actionable tips on setting your intention, seeing through the child’s perspective, and creating the safety and connection that allow executive skills to flourish. Essential Takeaways Just like all children, children with autism have their own unique strengths and challenges. You can’t assume that strategies that worked with one child on the spectrum will work with all children on the spectrum. Your intention is key. Children, and especially children on the spectrum, can sense your intention. Listen to your inner speech and check in on your intention, as this sets the trajectory of the interactions that follow. By observing children in a non-judgmental space, you can learn how the child learns, what the child seems to enjoy, what triggers the child’s upset, and more. Use these observations to shape future interactions and interventions. You can’t teach problem-solving and foster executive skills until you have a foundation of safety and connection in place. This includes predictability, structure, lots of visual supports, and authentic connection based on activities and games that the child enjoys. Important Links ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/) Seven Powers (https://consciousdiscipline.com/methodology/seven-powers/) Seven Skills (https://consciousdiscipline.com/methodology/seven-skills/) Elizabeth Montero-Cefalo, Conscious Discipline Master Instructor (https://consciousdiscipline.com/professional-development/instructors/elizabeth-montero-cefalo/) Show Outline 04:15 Conscious Discipline and children with special needs 07:26 What is autism? 09:39 Elizabeth’s story of a boy in her classroom who is on the spectrum 14:43 Importance of intention 17:22 Seeing the child and the child’s behavior differently 18:40 Non-judgmental observation 22:36 Power of Acceptance 26:50 Foundation of safety and connection 28:34 How to create safety for children on the spectrum 31:19 How to ignite an interest in connection 33:35 Teaching problem-solving/executive skills 35:01 Recap THANK YOU FOR LISTENING There are many ways you could have spent this time today, but you chose to spend it with me and I am grateful. If you enjoyed today’s show, please share it with others via your favorite social media platforms. Also, would you consider taking 60-seconds to leave an honest review and rating for the podcast on iTunes? Your feedback is extremely helpful when it comes to the ranking of the show and I love to hear your feedback! And don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast on iTunes to get automatic updates every time a new episode goes live! On behalf of our Conscious Discipline family, we wish you well.

In the not-so-distant past, children with behavior struggles were viewed as having a deficit. Interventions were a one-way street intended to “fix” children. In many cases, the response to unwanted behaviors was to withhold safety and connection from the children who most desperately needed it. Unsurprisingly, this approach was ineffective. Response to Intervention (RTI) originated from the special education community with the goal of building a two-way street linking adult action to the child’s response. As in Conscious Discipline, adults change first, and children change their behavior in response to this shift. The goal of an effective behavior plan is not to punish a child, but to teach the executive skills the child is missing. However, a child who does not have safety and connection cannot learn missing skills. In this episode, Conscious Discipline Master Instructor Jill Molli outlines the four steps to writing RTI plans that effectively build safety and connection so that children can learn critical skills. Jill has over two decades of experience in education, with roles including teacher, guidance counselor, assistant principal, and behavior disorder instructor. She is a Conscious Discipline Master Instructor who travels the world coaching, training, and guiding large-scale implementation. Listen in as Jill shares actionable tips for implementing plans that meet the differentiated needs of your students. Essential Takeaways • Behavior/discipline is relationship-specific. Instead of “fixing” children, we need to enhance the quality of the relationship. • When writing behavior plans, it is important to teach missing skills. However, this isn’t possible without the foundational pieces of safety and connection. Safety and connection foster brain integration and willingness. • If a child exhibits physical behaviors, he or she needs safety. A child who engages in power struggles needs connection. In Conscious Discipline, we use NARCS to build safety and REJECT to build connection. • Once this foundation is in place, children are ready to learn executive skills (page 291 in the Conscious Discipline book). Novel situations and stressed children require more scaffolding of these executive skills. • The intention of an effective plan should be to teach missing skills, rather than to punish children for skills they don’t possess. Show Outline :21 What is Conscious Discipline? :40 Introduction of guest Jill Molli 1:35 Discipline is relationship-specific 4:00 Background on Jill’s experience as a guidance counselor 5:35 Origins and intentions of RTI 6:52 Basics of RTI/MTSS 7:51 Critical foundation of safety and connection 9:37 How to “flip” from the behaviors you don’t want to see to the behaviors you do want 10:55 Physical behavior means the child needs safety (NARCS) 11:50 Noticing 12:25 Adult Assertiveness 13:11 Routines in pictures 13:34 Composure (downloading of composure/calm) 15:14 Safety (Safe Place, language of safety) 15:56 Power struggles mean the child needs connection (REJECT) 16:27 Rituals for connection 16:52 Encouragement for small successes 17:15 Jobs for the opportunity to be of service to others 17:26 Empathy 17:46 Choices 18:07 The School Family 18:25 Building executive skills 19:37 Importance of movement, music, art, and visuals 21:05 Recap- Four pieces to writing an effective intervention plan 24:46 What’s Becky up to? 25:14 What’s Becky celebrating?

Conscious Discipline is not just for schools, teachers, and parents. It’s for any adult who wants stronger, healthier relationships. The core values of Conscious Discipline—like connection, communication, and empathy—are key to any relationship, including marriage. In this episode, Conscious Discipline Master Instructor Kim Hughes opens her heart and home to share how Conscious Discipline has improved the health of her marriage. After her children left home, Kim realized that her marriage with her husband Scott had become about the kids. Wanting to recapture their connection and fall in love again, Kim decided to apply the principles of Conscious Discipline to her marriage. Listen in as Kim describes the changes she made and the transformational results. Essential Takeaways • In any relationship, it’s tempting to focus on how the other person needs to change. However, the only person we can change is ourselves. Remember that the motivation to change comes from the quality of the relationship. Start by doing what you can to improve the relationship. • The four essential ingredients to enhance any relationship or connection are eye contact, touch presence, and playfulness. • What we focus on, we get more of. Focus on and celebrate helpfulness, kindness, and teamwork. The more you embrace the positive, the more opportunities you’ll have to celebrate. • When we recognize our emotions and practice active calming, we can respond instead of reacting in challenging moments. Steps for Tomorrow • Commit to being more present and connected in your relationship. Infuse eye contact, touch, presence, and playfulness throughout your marriage. • Rather than focusing on what isn’t being done, notice and describe helpful acts. • Improve communication by noticing brain states. If your spouse is in the emotional state, offer empathy and understanding. If they are in the executive state, you can offer suggestions and focus on problem-solving. Important Links • ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/) • Seven Powers (https://consciousdiscipline.com/methodology/seven-powers/) • Seven Skills (https://consciousdiscipline.com/methodology/seven-skills/) • Kim Hughes, Conscious Discipline Master Instructor (https://consciousdiscipline.com/professional-development/instructors/kim-hughes/) Product Mentions • The NEW Conscious Discipline Book- Expanded and Updated (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/conscious-discipline-core/products/the-new-conscious-discipline-book-expanded-updated) • Brain State Poster Set (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/conscious-discipline-core/products/brain-state-poster-set) • 10-Session Conscious Discipline E-Course (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/e-course/products/ecourse-registration) Show Outline :20 What is Conscious Discipline? :37 How Conscious Discipline applies to all relationships 1:52 Introduction of guest Kim Hughes 2:20 Attention vs. connection 6:34 Background about Kim’s marriage and decision to change 8:35 Kim’s commitment to being present and connected 11:50 Four essential ingredients to enhance a relationship 13:37 Celebrating helpfulness 15:29 Story illustrating the transformation in Kim’s marriage 20:25 Power of unity 21:22 Husband’s comments on the change in Kim and the change in himself 25:55 Kim’s excitement for the future 26:23 Impact of the healthier marriage on their adult children 28:30 Summary 30:39 Be kind to yourself 31:13 What’s Becky up to? 32:38 What’s Becky celebrating? THANK YOU FOR LISTENING There are many ways you could have spent this time today, but you chose to spend it with me and I am grateful. If you enjoyed today’s show, please share it with others via your favorite social media platforms. Also, would you consider taking 60-seconds to leave an honest review and rating for the podcast on iTunes? Your feedback is extremely helpful when it comes to the ranking of

26% of children ages 0-4 have experienced trauma. For these children, a secure emotional attachment is life-changing. However, building connections with children of trauma isn’t easy. It requires empathy, patience, and persistence. When teachers don’t know how to respond to challenging behaviors, their solutions often make the problem worse. These children need to be included, not excluded. Additionally, 70% of adults have experienced trauma. This means that in classrooms across the nation, teachers are trying to help children heal from trauma while still struggling with their own. For administrators, it’s crucial to support teachers so that they can support children. In this episode, Conscious Discipline Certified Instructor Abbi Kruse shares five powerful ways for administrators to support teachers in working with children of trauma. Abbi is the founder and executive director of The Playing Field in Madison, Wisconsin. The Playing Field serves children 0-4 and aims to level the playing field by working with homeless children, middle-class children, and Head Start students in one classroom. Listen as Abbi shares her wisdom on building a school culture that empowers teachers to tackle this challenging, vitally important work. Essential Takeaways • Although we view children as resilient, young children are more vulnerable to trauma than at any other stage of life. • Working with children who have experienced trauma is difficult, but we must remember our “why.” These children have experienced so much adversity, but providing just one secure attachment can change their lives and the lives of others around them. • To be truly effective in working with children of trauma, we must first address our own trauma. • One administrator can’t possibly offer support for all teachers and children at once. This is why it’s essential to build a united, supportive school culture in which teachers rely on and help one another. Steps for Tomorrow • Remember to always keep the mission in front of yourself and your staff. Instead of only focusing on “how” you will possibly accomplish something, remember “why” you’re doing this work. • Begin celebrating even small successes. Provide teachers with ongoing support and sincere gratitude. • Invest in professional development. Ensure that your teachers have the skills they need to do the job. Important Links • ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/) • Seven Powers (https://consciousdiscipline.com/methodology/seven-powers/) • Seven Skills (https://consciousdiscipline.com/methodology/seven-skills/) • Safe Place (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/shubert/shuberts-classroom/safe-place/) • Abbi Kruse, Conscious Discipline Certified Instructor (https://consciousdiscipline.com/professional-development/instructors/abbi-kruse/) Product Mentions • The NEW Conscious Discipline Book- Expanded and Updated (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/conscious-discipline-core/products/the-new-conscious-discipline-book-expanded-updated) • Creating the School Family (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/school-family/products/creating-the-school-family) • Professional Development (https://consciousdiscipline.com/professional-development/) • Self-Regulation Value Pack (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/the-safe-place/products/self-regulation-value-pack) • CLASSROOM EDITION: Feeling Buddies Self-Regulation Toolkit (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/feeling-buddies/products/feeling-buddies-self-regulation-toolkit-english-only) Show Outline :22 What is Conscious Discipline? :56 Introduction of guest Abbi Kruse 2:02 Developmental trauma 5:54 Helping teachers respond to children with trauma 8:06 Practice #1: Be honest 10:17 Practice #2: Focus on the mission 11:20 Practice #3: Provide teachers with the skills they need 14:11 Practice #4: Build a School Family that supports one another 15:38 Pract

What supports are available for helping foster parents manage the challenging behaviors that often arise with foster children and children who have experienced trauma? Have you ever had a child in your care you just weren’t sure how to help? In the United States there are over 420,00 children in foster care. These children have experienced severe stress and trauma in their lives. Statistically these children’s life outcomes include early pregnancy, homelessness and placement in special education. Parenting foster children does not come without its challenges. Listen in as Amy Speidel shares her story of parenting both foster children and her own biological children with Conscious Discipline and the generational outcomes each have experienced. Essential Takeaways • No matter the challenges, extend energy and non-verbal messages that communicate the child is worthy and loved. • Model taking responsibility for your own upset to create a space for children to do the same and establish yourself as a trustworthy adult. Steps for Tomorrow • Build strong safety before trying to connect with foster children; speak a lot of safety language. • Create connections and rituals that begin to build a sense of value and belonging. • Help foster children with their story rather than ignore it because it’s difficult or painful. Important Links: • What is Conscious Discipline: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8j3gF1dh_t4 • Wishing Well: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8L8MMrRkGQ&index=14&list=PLC1FF90B6D998E9EE • Parenting Answers with Amy Speidel: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwhBPqxwcu8qZlXXEbOVgYxzuPXgZfFt1 • Foster Care Statistics in the United States: https://www.acf.hhs.gov/cb/faq/foster-care4 Product Mentions: • There’s Got to Be A Better Way: Discipline That Works (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/products/theres-got-to-be-a-better-way-discipline-that-works) • The NEW Conscious Discipline Book- Expanded and Updated (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/conscious-discipline-core/products/the-new-conscious-discipline-book-expanded-updated) • Wish Well Board (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/school-family/products/wish-well-board) Show Outline 3:00 What is Conscious Discipline? 4:52 Children in Foster Care statistics 6:22 Introduction of Amy Speidel, Parent Coach and Foster Parent 7:10 Amy’s story of becoming a Foster Adoptive Parent 10:17 Behaviors exhibited with Amy’s foster children and what help was provided 13:15 Information that was provided regarding Ron’s foster story 15:17 Were strategies provided for how to connect with these children? 17:30 What impact did Conscious Discipline have on parenting your biological child? 22:08 Impact of Conscious Discipline on parenting your foster children 26:01 What generational effects do you see with your grandchildren? 28:50 Losing composure story with grandson Sean story 32:15 Advice for teachers who receive foster children as students into their classrooms 35:24 Wishing well 36:10 Helping foster children with their story 39:11 Final words of encouragement for those who work with foster children THANK YOU FOR LISTENING There are many ways you could have spent this time today, but you chose to spend it with me and I am grateful. If you enjoyed today’s show, please share it with others via your favorite social media platforms. Also, would you consider taking 60-seconds to leave an honest review and rating for the podcast on iTunes? Your feedback is extremely helpful when it comes to the ranking of the show and I love to hear your feedback! Also, don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, to get automatic updates every time a new episode goes live! On behalf of our Conscious Discipline family, we wish you well.

Conscious Discipline is not a program; it’s a practice that asks adults to make a significant mindset shift. Implementation of Conscious Discipline is a process that begins with experiencing this shift, then building skills, and finally adding structures that support our practice of the skills. Administrators coaching teachers in Conscious Discipline must recognize and accept that different teachers are at different stages in this journey. Fortunately, we have resources to support you every step of the way. Join Master Instructor Jill Molli as she shares her expertise on working with both skeptical and willing teachers to implement Conscious Discipline. Jill has been a Conscious Discipline Master Instructor for the last 17 years and directs long-term, large-scale implementation projects. Previously, she was an award-winning teacher and counselor. In this episode, Jill discusses her own experience as a skeptical teacher and how she applies this experience in helping administrators coach teachers. Important Links • ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/) • Seven Powers (https://consciousdiscipline.com/methodology/seven-powers/) • Seven Skills (https://consciousdiscipline.com/methodology/seven-skills/) • Safe Place (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/shubert/shuberts-classroom/safe-place/) • Jill Molli, Conscious Discipline Master Instructor (https://consciousdiscipline.com/professional-development/instructors/jill-molli/) Product Mentions • The NEW Conscious Discipline Book- Expanded and Updated (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/conscious-discipline-core/products/the-new-conscious-discipline-book-expanded-updated) • Creating the School Family (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/school-family/products/creating-the-school-family) • Self-Regulation Value Pack (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/the-safe-place/products/self-regulation-value-pack) • CLASSROOM EDITION: Feeling Buddies Self-Regulation Toolkit (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/feeling-buddies/products/feeling-buddies-self-regulation-toolkit-english-only) Show Outline :22 What is Conscious Discipline? 0:40 Introduction of guest Jill Molli 1:39 Process of implementing Conscious Discipline and the importance of intention 7:05 Jill’s story of experiencing a mindset shift with Conscious Discipline 15:08 Working with teachers who are skeptical about Conscious Discipline 17:29 Working with teachers who willing 20:02 Importance of first cultivating the “soil” 21:01 Questions to ask when identifying a teacher’s needs 22:11 What’s Becky up to? 23:04 What’s Becky celebrating? 23:50 Becky’s commitment THANK YOU FOR LISTENING There are many ways you could have spent this time today, but you chose to spend it with me and I am grateful. If you enjoyed today’s show, please share it with others via your favorite social media platforms. Also, would you consider taking 60-seconds to leave an honest review and rating for the podcast on iTunes? Your feedback is extremely helpful when it comes to the ranking of the show and I love to hear your feedback! And don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast on iTunes to get automatic updates every time a new episode goes live! On behalf of our Conscious Discipline family, we wish you well.

In the United States, many of us have now lived through a decade of high-stakes testing. This testing costs an average of $1.7 billion annually per state, and students take about 18 major tests each year. The pressure on students, teachers, and schools is intense. Research shows that about 40 percent of students experience test anxiety. Studies also indicate that testing interferes with the student-teacher relationship, which is the basis of all learning. With this emphasis on testing, the curriculum has narrowed, leaving less time for creativity and recreation. In addition, teachers and administrators often feel that there is no time for social-emotional learning through programs like Conscious Discipline. In reality, Conscious Discipline creates a calm, connected environment that optimizes critical-thinking and learning. It also gives students (and adults) skills that help them manage the pressure of high-stakes testing. In this episode, Cynthia Robinson-Rivers, Head of School at Van Ness Elementary in Washington D.C., shares how Conscious Discipline has helped her staff and students handle the pressure of testing. Cynthia is an award-winning administrator who has been recognized for her social-emotional learning practices and highly effective leadership. Listen as Cynthia gives practical tips for balancing academics, testing, and social-emotional learning. Important Links • ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/) • Seven Powers (https://consciousdiscipline.com/methodology/seven-powers/) • Seven Skills (https://consciousdiscipline.com/methodology/seven-skills/) • Safe Place (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/shubert/shuberts-classroom/safe-place/) • Brain State Model: Executive State (https://consciousdiscipline.com/methodology/brain-state-model/#tab_executivestate) Product Mentions • The NEW Conscious Discipline Book- Expanded and Updated (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/conscious-discipline-core/products/the-new-conscious-discipline-book-expanded-updated) • Creating the School Family (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/school-family/products/creating-the-school-family) • Self-Regulation Value Pack (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/the-safe-place/products/self-regulation-value-pack) • CLASSROOM EDITION: Feeling Buddies Self-Regulation Toolkit (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/feeling-buddies/products/feeling-buddies-self-regulation-toolkit-english-only) :22 What is Conscious Discipline? 1:17 Research on high-stakes testing 3:15 Punishments, rewards, and testing 4:12 Introduction of guest Cynthia Robinson-Rivers 5:11 Van Ness Elementary and Conscious Discipline implementation 8:00 High-stakes testing in Washington D.C. 9:11 Buffering high-stakes testing with social-emotional learning 12:36 Reducing teacher stress 14:30 Systemic side effects of high-stakes testing 15:40 Importance of the whole child and individual student needs 17:55 Cynthia’s approach to social-emotional learning 19:42 Responding to push-back from families 21:30 Success stories 23:28 Three ideas for teachers/administrators to remember amidst the pressure of testing 28:30 What’s Becky celebrating? 29:02 What’s Becky up to? THANK YOU FOR LISTENING

Many people believe that Conscious Discipline is an early childhood program. In reality, Conscious Discipline is a life practice appropriate for all ages. It’s a mindset shift and skillset upgrade that we use to manage our thoughts, emotions, and behavior. This allows us to set and achieve goals and solve problems or conflicts. Social emotional learning has no age limit—Conscious Discipline can and does work with older children. Listen as Kristin Abel, the pioneer of Conscious Discipline implementation with older children, shares her tips for success. Kristin is a National Board Certified teacher with 25 years of experience in education. She has used Conscious Discipline for the majority of her career, mostly with fifth grade students, and has trained both middle and high school teachers. Kristin is currently a dean of students. If you’ve ever wondered how to use Conscious Discipline with older children, this episode has the inspiration and advice you need to get started. Important Links • ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/) • Kristin Abel, Conscious Discipline Certified Instructor (https://consciousdiscipline.com/professional-development/instructors/kristin-abel/) • Seven Powers (https://consciousdiscipline.com/methodology/seven-powers/) • Seven Skills (https://consciousdiscipline.com/methodology/seven-skills/) • Safe Place (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/shubert/shuberts-classroom/safe-place/) • Feeling Buddies Self-Regulation Toolkit (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/shubert/shuberts-classroom/feeling-buddies-self-regulation-toolkit/) • Greetings (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/shubert/entrance/greetings/) Product Mentions • Creating the School Family (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/school-family/products/creating-the-school-family) • Self-Regulation Value Pack (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/the-safe-place/products/self-regulation-value-pack) • CLASSROOM EDITION: Feeling Buddies Self-Regulation Toolkit (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/feeling-buddies/products/feeling-buddies-self-regulation-toolkit-english-only) • Feeling Buddies Basic Toolkit for Classrooms (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/feeling-buddies/products/feeling-buddies-basic-toolkit-for-classrooms) • Shubert’s BIG Voice (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/shubert-sophie/products/shuberts-big-voice) Show Outline :23 What is Conscious Discipline? :50 What are real teachers? 1:31 Conscious Discipline for all ages 5:05 Introduction of guest Kristin Abel 6:29 Kristin’s decision to try Conscious Discipline with older children 7:53 Children take skills with them into middle and high school 8:37 Story of a former student (now a senior) continuing to use Conscious Discipline 10:27 Academic results of using Conscious Discipline 11:33 Powers, skills, and structures 12:14 Adapting powers, skills, and structures to older children 14:50 Why older children don’t always “know better by now” 17:14 How older children respond to Conscious Discipline 21:24 Using Feeling Buddies with older children 26:31 Three key tips for teachers of older students 30:40 What’s Becky celebrating? 31:20 What’s Becky up to? THANK YOU FOR LISTENING There are many ways you could have spent this time today, but you chose to spend it with me and I am grateful. If you enjoyed today’s show, please share it with others via your favorite social media platforms. Also, would you consider taking 60-seconds to leave an honest review and rating for the podcast on iTunes? Your feedback is extremely helpful when it comes to the ranking of the show and I love to hear your feedback! Also, don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, to get automatic updates every time a new episode goes live! On behalf of our Conscious Discipline family, we wish you well.

Have you noticed that the same children repeatedly receive the same consequences, often with no significant change in behavior? This is because most people have confused consequences with punishment. In Conscious Discipline, we differentiate consequences from punishment in very significant ways. The first six skills of Conscious Discipline build an essential foundation that allows the seventh skill, consequences, to be effective. With this foundation in place, consequences work, and lasting behavior change is possible. Without this foundation, our response to behavior will continue to be ineffective. In this episode, Becky Bailey and guest Amy Niemeier discuss the transformational power of Conscious Discipline consequences. Amy has been in education for 18 years and is in her seventh year as the principal of Slate Run Elementary School. She is also a Conscious Discipline Certified Instructor. Under Amy’s leadership, Conscious Discipline implementation at Slate Run has resulted in a tremendous culture shift and a 70% decrease in office referrals. Listen as Amy discusses her success with Conscious Discipline consequences, why they’re effective, and how you can achieve similar results. Important Links • ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/) • Amy Niemeier, Conscious Discipline Certified Instructor (https://consciousdiscipline.com/professional-development/instructors/amy-niemeier/) • Conscious Discipline Brain State Model (https://consciousdiscipline.com/methodology/brain-state-model/) • Brain Smart Start (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/shubert/shuberts-classroom/brain-smart-start/) • I Love You Rituals (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/shubert/shuberts-classroom/i-love-you-rituals/) • Creating the Habit of Noticing (https://consciousdiscipline.com/creating-the-habit-of-noticing/) Show Outline :20 What is Conscious Discipline? 3:07 Where are the consequences in Conscious Discipline? 3:34 Addressing common myths about consequences 5:39 Three types of consequences 7:21 Difference between consequences and punishment 7:50 Introduction of guest Amy Niemeier 9:11 Five-year results of Conscious Discipline implementation at Amy’s school 14:21 Amy’s understanding of consequences vs. punishment 15:41 Success story: 70% decrease in office referrals 16:12 How to help staff shift from punishing to teaching skills 17:53 Why punishments don’t work with disconnected kids 18:58 Effectiveness of natural consequences 20:33 Effectiveness of logical consequences 21:12 Practicing consequences in personal life 22:51 Amy’s personal success story 26:44 Impact of Conscious Discipline on behavior support plan at Amy’s school 28:48 Why consequences are the seventh Conscious Discipline skill 29:44 Three steps for making consequences effective 33:25 What’s Becky celebrating? 33:48 What’s Becky up to? On behalf of our Conscious Discipline family, we wish you well.

Today’s teachers must juggle more initiatives, responsibilities and challenges than ever before. For this reason, introducing Conscious Discipline to faculty/staff as a new principal can be difficult. Staff must recognize the need for social and emotional learning, be willing to view children with positive intent and love and commit to the process of transformational change. This is an ongoing journey, and the key is to go slowly. Listen as Dr. Heather Finn shares her experiences and insight about introducing and implementing Conscious Discipline as a new principal. For twelve years, Heather was an award-winning teacher. She worked as a college adjunct professor for five years while earning her doctorate. She then became an assistant principal at Green Valley Elementary, a Title I school populated by students who had experienced significant trauma. After experiencing success with Conscious Discipline there, Heather became a principal at Bunker Hill Elementary in Indianapolis. In this episode, she shares tips for new principals on gradually bringing Conscious Discipline to a school. Essential Takeaways • For Conscious Discipline to succeed, it’s important for adults to view children through a lens of positive intent and love at all times. Adults can then teach students the skills they are missing (through no fault of their own) rather than punishing them. • Conscious Discipline can meet the needs of all students and work with any population. At Green Valley, there were typically 14-15 children in a class of 22 that had significant difficulties and needed consistent support throughout the day. Over the four years that Heather worked at Green Valley, teachers and students saw tremendous success with Conscious Discipline. • When faculty and staff are open to seeing others with positive intent and making connections, the impact of Conscious Discipline is felt both inside the classroom and outside of school. • It’s essential for principals introducing Conscious Discipline to live it so they can naturally model the skills and powers. • Choose a few pieces of Conscious Discipline to implement bit by bit (e.g. language of noticing, greeting rituals, morning meetings, Brain Smart Start). • When bringing Conscious Discipline to a school, be mindful of current traditions and rituals as well. Steps for Tomorrow • Start by working on your own composure. Your composure and leadership are the most important pieces, allowing you to model the best parts of Conscious Discipline. Model noticing for teachers and students. • Celebrate what you notice and what is already wonderful about the school you’ve stepped into. Notice the traditions and foundational pieces that are already in place. • Come up with a theme that is the foundation of what you hope to build and achieve within the school. For instance, Heather’s school theme is “We Are Family: All My Bulldogs and Me.” Important Links • ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/) • Power of Love (Webinar) (https://consciousdiscipline.com/power-of-love/) • Power of Intention (Webinar) (https://consciousdiscipline.com/power-of-intention/) • Skill of Positive Intent (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/book-portal/chapter-9-positive-intent/) • Greeting Ritual (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/shubert/sophies-classroom/greeting-ritual/) • Brain Smart Start (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/shubert/shuberts-classroom/brain-smart-start/) Product Mentions • Conscious Discipline: Building Resilient Schools (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/conscious-discipline-core/products/the-new-conscious-discipline-book-expanded-updated) • Creating the School Family (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/school-family/products/creating-the-school-family) • Seven Skills Poster Set (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/conscious-discipline-core/products/seven-skills-poster-set)

1 in 4 women and 1 in 7 men are victims of domestic violence. Each year, 5 million children in the United States witness domestic violence in their homes. These traumatic experiences profoundly impact children, making them fearful, anxious and always on guard. They may feel worthless, powerless and starved for affection and approval. Children affected by domestic violence, trauma and chronic stress find it difficult to trust and connect with others. They feel unsafe and are often defensive and destructive. On the opposite end of the spectrum, these children may dissociate and shut down. The good news is that we can make a difference. In this episode, Kelly Frazier-Wawire shares her experiences working in Chicago’s public schools with children who have been exposed to domestic violence and chronic stress. Kelly has worked in education for 15 years, spending 10 of these years with Chicago Public Schools (CPS). In 2011, she left the classroom to study clinical social work, providing play-based therapy to children on Chicago’s West Side. Now, Kelly is a Social Emotional Learning Specialist for CPS. Listen as she explains how Conscious Discipline has made a powerful, positive difference in the lives of children who have experienced trauma and violence. Essential Takeaways • Children who witness domestic violence are expected to remain silent about this family secret. They bury feelings of shame in the nervous system, often creating post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). They may blame themselves and feel isolated and vulnerable. • For these children, the School Family, I Love You Rituals, and Greeting Rituals are especially powerful. • It’s also very important for teachers to change the way they view children who have experienced trauma and their behavior. Behaviors that are often perceived as “calling for attention” are actually “calling for connection.” • Conscious Discipline provides concrete, practical strategies—and hope—to teachers in the most challenging schools. It gives them the skills and tools needed to support students who have witnessed ongoing violence and experienced chronic stress. This can restore the joy of teaching and prevent teachers from burning out. • Conscious Discipline fulfills essential needs such as safety and order, a schoolwide supportive environment, trust, shared power, and social emotional learning for both children and adults. Together, these components create an environment where children who have experienced trauma can thrive and be successful. Important Links • ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/) • Power of Love (Webinar) (https://consciousdiscipline.com/power-of-love/) • Power of Intention (Webinar) (https://consciousdiscipline.com/power-of-intention/) • Skill of Positive Intent (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/book-portal/chapter-9-positive-intent/) • Greeting Ritual (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/shubert/sophies-classroom/greeting-ritual/) On behalf of our Conscious Discipline family, we wish you well.

Corporal punishment is punishment that is intended to cause a person physical pain. Historically, the idea was that pain, degradation, and humiliation could deter an individual from committing similar offenses in the future. Today, corporal punishment is increasingly viewed as a violation of children’s human rights on the international front. There is also a growing body of evidence supporting the idea that corporal punishment is not only ineffective, but also harmful to children. It’s linked to lower test scores and problems with depression, fear and anger. It also contributes to the dangerous notion that violence is the solution to our problems. Despite this research, society’s faith in corporal punishment persists. Conscious Discipline presents a positive alternative to physical punishment that is based on safety, connection and problem-solving. Listen as special guest Dr. Barbara Landon discusses bringing Conscious Discipline to the Caribbean island of Grenada to teach parents alternative ways to discipline children, ultimately building a society of effective problem-solvers. Dr. Landon is a neuropsychologist and professor of bioethics at St. George’s School of Medicine in Grenada. She was drawn to Conscious Discipline because it is “completely consistent with everything [she’s] ever learned about the brain.” In this episode, Dr. Landon describes her innovative approach to helping parents in Grenada shift from physically punishing children to teaching them missing skills. Essential Takeaways • There is no data to support the effectiveness of corporal punishment, also known as physical punishment. In fact, data says the opposite: Children who are physically punished have lower test scores and more issues with depression, fear and anger. In cases of severe abuse, children are more prone to dropping out of school. • Despite the research, 75% of parents in the United States believe that corporal punishment is effective, and 19 states still allow corporal punishment in schools. Our beliefs about physical punishment—and punishment in general—are deeply engrained and difficult to change. • In Grenada, children from families that received Conscious Discipline training had significantly better cognitive scores than their peers. Due to the program’s success, additional funding has been allotted to expand Conscious Discipline programs in Grenada and build a demonstration center for other Caribbean islands and small developing nations. • Even for adults who are excited about the concept of Conscious Discipline, it’s vital to first experience safety and connection in order to offer it to children. Steps for Tomorrow • Start by building community and fostering safety and connection for adults who have never experienced it before. • Attend or bring a two-day Conscious Discipline workshop to introduce the powers, skills, and structures to the community. • Find people who have experienced safety and connection and want to help spread it to others by teaching Conscious Discipline. Important Links • ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/) • The Conscious Discipline Brain State Model (https://consciousdiscipline.com/methodology/brain-state-model/) • Friends and Family Board (https://consciousdiscipline.com/free-resources/shubert/shuberts-classroom/friends-and-family-board/) • Using Logical Consequences (https://consciousdiscipline.com/videos/using-logical-consequences/) • Conscious Discipline Events (https://consciousdiscipline.com/professional-development/events/) Product Mentions • Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/collections/parent-education/products/easy-to-love-difficult-to-discipline) • I Love You Rituals (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/products/i-love-you-rituals) • I Love You Rituals Deluxe Pack (https://shop.consciousdiscipline.com/products/i-love-you-rituals-deluxe-pack) Show Outline :20 What is Conscious Discipline? 0:44 Grenada

Teachers are exposed to many new initiatives that are asked of them on a daily basis, some they agree with and some they don’t. Some of these initiatives are viewed as meaningful, while others are considered inconvenient. For administrators and school leaders, it’s important to be sensitive to these viewpoints when introducing Conscious Discipline. Conscious Discipline is a transformational change that requires time, passion, and commitment. It asks adults to shift both their skillset and their mindset, particularly in the way they view misbehavior and children who misbehave. This change isn’t easy and is sometimes met with reluctance or unwillingness. Listen as special guest Amanda Spight shares how she has navigated the challenges of implementing Conscious Discipline at her elementary school. Amanda is the principal of Gladden Elementary School in Belton, Missouri. She is also the mother of a two-year-old son and has successfully implemented Conscious Discipline both at school and at home. In today’s episode, Amanda shares her stories of success and provides tips on introducing Conscious Discipline to staff, proactively addressing unwillingness, and staying the course. Essential Takeaways • Conscious Discipline requires transformational change rather than traditional change. Transformational change should be organization-wide, occurs over a period of time, and requires adults to make mindset shifts and skillset shifts. Most of us are used to traditional change, which is faster and easier. • Teachers are regularly asked to implement new initiatives. Increase willingness through relationship-building and shared leadership, rather than announcing, “We’re doing Conscious Discipline.” • Allow implementation to progress organically and connect it to the why (the purpose behind new changes). Surround yourself with support and encouragement. • It’s helpful to model for staff the processes, activities, and structures they’ll use in their classrooms. Introduce a “new normal.” • The first year of Conscious Discipline is a transitional year. Hold to your values and what you believe is important for our children, and you’ll see significant positive change in time. Steps for Tomorrow • Start with noticing. Without judgement, provide feedback on the positives you see. • Offer empathy to others. If you’re a principal, extend empathy to your staff. If you’re a parent or teacher, give empathy to your students. • By consistently working on noticing and empathy, you’ll build feelings of safety and increase willingness. Important Links • ConsciousDiscipline.com • Brain Smart Start • Noticing • Jill Molli • Jobs • Commitments • Safekeeper Ritual Product Mentions • Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline • Creating the School Family • School Family Job Set Show Outline :20 What is Conscious Discipline? :48 What are real teachers? 2:05 Conscious Discipline and transformational change 3:14 Changing how you see behavior and children who misbehave 5:20 Introduction of guest Amanda Spight 6:11 Amanda’s introduction to Conscious Discipline 10:00 Introducing Conscious Discipline to staff 14:12 Integrating Brain Smart Starts and commitments into staff meetings 15:19 The four components of a Brain Smart Start 17:20 Proactively addressing resistance from staff 20:00 Shifting from external rewards to internal skills 21:35 The value of noticing 22:00 Amanda’s story of professional success with Conscious Discipline 26:00 Why the first year of Conscious Discipline is a transitional year 27:00 Amanda’s story of parenting success with Conscious Discipline 30:00 The importance of deciding what you value 31:00 Two steps for principals and parents to get started with Conscious Discipline THANK YOU FOR LISTENING There are many ways you could have spent this time today, but you chose to spend it with me and I am grateful. If you enjoyed today’s show, please share it with others via your favorite social media platforms.

Peer coaching is a powerful way for teachers to pay it forward. Whatever you offer to others, you strengthen in yourself. As a peer coach you learn to listen nonjudgmentally, notice successes, and celebrate them. As you share your skills and talents, you learn to be more conscious and intentional in your own life. Sometimes, though, there’s a lack of willingness to coach or be coached. This is the result of fear: fear of not knowing what we’re doing, fear of being perceived as a know-it-all, fear of being judged or becoming judgmental, etc. In this episode, Becky Bailey and special guest Alissa McGraw discuss how to overcome common obstacles to peer coaching. Alissa is a 14-year veteran teacher who started out as the only teacher practicing Conscious Discipline at her elementary school. Now, she hosts twice monthly voluntary meetings attended by administrators, counselors, and 25-30 teachers. Listen as Alissa describes her transformative peer coaching process, including how to build connections and foster collaboration. Essential Takeaways • Peer coaching is a “win-win” for all involved. The best way to learn something is to do it yourself, then teach it to others. Teaching others encourages reflection and self-discovery. • Limiting beliefs about ourselves sometimes decrease our willingness to coach or be coached. Remember that sharing your gifts in no way discounts the gifts of others. • The peer coaching process can include answering questions, modeling, observing other teachers and being observed by others. You may also want to conduct voluntary meetings or book studies with interested teachers. • The classroom is a “sacred space” for many teachers. For peers to be comfortable inviting you into their classrooms, it’s essential that you build authentic connections. • Transformational change can’t be forced; it must be inspired. Work with the teachers who are willing and give time and space to those who aren’t. Steps for Tomorrow • Start off slow. Send out emails to gauge interest, consider hosting voluntary meetings, and express a willingness to visit classrooms or invite others into your classroom. • Get your students involved in the coaching process. Have them read Shubert books to younger children or model structures like the Brain Smart Start and the Time Machine. • Live it! Be the person you want others to become. Share your journey openly with others and build connections that pave the way for collaboration. Important Links • ConsciousDiscipline.com • Brain Smart Start • Noticing • Kindness Recorder Product Mentions • Time Machine • Safe Place • Shubert Books Show Outline :20 What is Conscious Discipline? :54 The power of paying it forward 2:20 Addressing the limiting beliefs that keep us from coaching/being coached by peers 4:55 Introduction of guest Alissa McGraw 6:28 Impact of Conscious Discipline 9:30 Using Conscious Discipline with older students 12:25 Getting into peer coaching 13:40 Sharing Conscious Discipline with peers through voluntary meetings 14:08 Evolution of Alissa’s monthly meetings 15:15 Relationship building and its impact on peer coaching 16:50 Alissa’s coaching process 18:20 The role of administrative support in peer coaching 19:35 Story of a support teacher’s success with noticing 22:30 Responding to peer teachers who are not willing 25:10 Three tips for teachers considering peer coaching 27:50 What’s Becky up to? THANK YOU FOR LISTENING There are many ways you could have spent this time today, but you chose to spend it with me and I am grateful. If you enjoyed today’s show, please share it with others via your favorite social media platforms. Also, would you consider taking 60-seconds to leave an honest review and rating for the podcast on iTunes? Your feedback is extremely helpful when it comes to the ranking of the show and I love to hear your feedback! Also, don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, to get automatic update

The end of the school year can be a challenging time when difficult behaviors pop up—even in the most connected classrooms! For students, summer can be an exciting and unpredictable time, and next year may be an anxiety-provoking unknown. The routines that anchor their classroom lives with predictability and safety are soon to be left behind, as are the rituals that have connected class members all year long. Students’ big feelings about these changes often show up as outbursts, chatter, defiance and other stress behaviors. In this episode, Becky Bailey and special guest Vicky Hepler tackle end of year challenges with rituals that help ease the transition to summer and beyond. Vicky is a Master Instructor and a 36-year veteran of the classroom. Learn from her personal experiences, including the importance of “I will remember” and specific activities to soothe the “what ifs” of anxiety that crop up in the final weeks of school. Essential Takeaways • Outbursts and behavior challenges signal sadness about leaving friends and anxiety about what comes next. For many students, summer lacks structure and next year is a big unknown. For some, summer also means facing issues like a lack of food or unsafe neighborhoods. • Connected School Families sometimes experience the hardest goodbyes. The more difficult the behaviors, the greater the need for end of year connecting rituals. • For older children, begin preparing 20-30 days before school ends. For younger children, begin 2-3 weeks before school ends. • Reframe the emotionally-charged phrase “I’m going to miss…” with the emotionally-grounded phrase “I will remember…” • Create memory books for children to take with them. • Have older children write questions for students in the next grade level (and have the older students respond). • Anxiety’s message is “I need more information to feel safe.” Ask yourself, “How can we soothe the anxiety and answer the what ifs in my classroom?” • Take a field trip to the next grade so children have a better sense of what to expect next year. • Involve the family and plan an end of year celebration with a focus on remembering. Steps for Tomorrow • #1 Do something! Acknowledge the movement from this known, connected class to an uncertain summer and an unknown next year. “I will remember…” • #2 Create a memory book or video. Distribute a copy to every student. • #3 Give students the opportunity to gather information about what to expect next year. • Provide ways to remember the calming strategies they’ve learned (portable Safe Places, etc.). • When a student has an outburst likely stemming from end of year turmoil, breathe and say, “I’m going to miss you, too. I remember when we…” to help him or her process the emotion and upshift to the higher centers of the brain. Important Links www.ConsciousDiscipline.com Products • Conscious Discipline: Building Resilient Classrooms • Kindness Counts • Creating the School Family Show Outline :00 Introduction of Dr. Becky Bailey and Conscious Discipline :50 End of year countdown and big emotions 2:01 End of year at Dr. Bailey’s first School Family 3:25 What to do 3:40 Building a School Family with the Power of Unity 4:10 Routines and rituals 4:40 Thanksgiving story 5:50 Introduction of Master Instructor Vicky Hepler 6:50 When end of year problems begin 7:25 Anxiety- Their safety net has a leak! 8:15 Young children have a limited concept of time and ending 9:19 End of year rituals say, “No matter what, I will remember…” 9:50 Dr. Bailey’s PhD story 10:45 The power of rituals 12:42 Broken arm story 14:00 When is it time to start your end of year rituals 16:00 Helpful rituals 16:55 “I’m going to miss you” vs “I will remember…” 17:22 “I will remember” book 18:15 “Love is a Circle” song from Kindness Counts CD 19:48 Enabling older students to seek answers to their questions 20:30 How to soothe “what if” anxieties 21:05 Field trips to the next grade 19:55