El Sooper PODCAST!!

THIS WEEK!! We have a YUGE announcement but someone already made it for us on HER podcast, but it's still YUGE and I'm very mexcited. Also el Sooper GOES ON AN EPIC RANT and wow it gets a little uncomfortable and he's very sorry, also JESS tries to insult him philosophically but it don't work, Jess, it don't work so try again maybe. and nobody cares about DoogarLand, Matt. Also what does Matt have to deal with, it's people that have bad decisions and wow this guy is so judgey seriously, also el Sooper MEXPLAINS the incredible meltdown of Q-Anon and a scam maybe kinda and it's awesome and it makes him happy for about 15 seconds, and then there's a great announcement, and Norm Macdonald is the BEST!!! Also, our favorite comedians, not a mexhaustive list. WOW you have to listen NOW!!!

This WEEK!!! We discuss which one of us is actually WH-anon who wrote that op-ed in the New York TImes!! Also we talk about non-political stuff, and BTS and Nikki Minaj and also that guy from the Cosby Show. Not Bill Cosby. Then we stirewalt everything all the time! WOW!! You have to listen now!!

Listen now!!

THIS WEEK we go MATTLESS again, because he was banned and also suspended for many reasons, but we have Jessica Heddings and we have SMATT!! And el SOoper esplains how he lived at home when he was a leetle latino, and the theme of the podcast is confusion, and we talk about movies A LOT, sorry anti-movies people. And should we reward the papillons with an autographed photo of SMATT?! And I guess we talk about Manafort and Cohen and middle aged Mexicans, and all about the Q-anon conspiracy falling apart, SI!! You have to listen now!!

This week we answer the very important question of why is MMK the name of Jessica’s demon? Also rebar-face and his origin story!! Also el Sooper soopsplains the entire Keef Ellison story and also the entire complete story about the Muslim compound in New Mexico! DO they say black lives SMATTER? NO! Here’s why. And here’s the Pharmacist’s Life tweets that are funny and that are not funny and he doesn’t want to publicly acknowledge what he did in the DM’s!! Wow you have to listen right NOW!!

IT'S EPISODE THREE HUNDRED AND WOW we don't do anything special. At all. We basically just have a regular podcast. But it's three hundred, so. Yay. Anyway, SMATT is back and so is MATT and he goes off on a rant about genetically mattified organisms and then tells el Sooper that he has polio because he won the debate also we talk about Jess's creepy smile at a 45 degree angle, also PAM is way better than BLUNT and you should get the hell off my podcast if you think otherwise, and don't play that video, it's awful. Also el Sooper exposes what the Q-Anon conspiracy is!! Wow!! You have to listen to it NOW!!!

THIS WEEK we discover who is age-shaming el Sooper, but unfortunately there is NO MATT, NO MATT, and we'll tell you why. Unfortunately there IS a Jess, and she whines about what el Sooper posts in the DMs - here's a hint, it's necrotizing! Go harass Matt, but don't tell him we told you to do that. Then el Sooper talks about his deal, he's got a deal with Big Pharma!! And more whataboutism spin it's the best!! YOU HAVE TO listen now!!

THIS WEEK we are Matt-less again, but we have SMATT!! And SMATT is better than MATT!! Also we have Jess I guess. We talk about what happened with Vladimir in Helsinki, and why Dumbocrats are stupid with the whole interpreter thing also why they're so extreme and it makes it not even Hitler and not even Mussolini!! We explain butter sticks! Oh yes we do!! El Sooper also goes after Kylie Jenner, because why not?! And we make fun of depressed liberals who hate their babies!! Wow it's totally listenable for once!! GO LISTEN!!

THIS WEEK!! THE GREAT RETURN OF MATT to the podcast!! Matttricia joins SMATT and the girl as we discuss the big stories of the last 40 minutes before we record the show!! We talk about Peter's Strzok before Congress. El Sooper talks about existential and ideological roller coasters and Bannnon's ban from bookstores and why Phillipe Reines is such a scummy scumbag, but el sooper does NOT go on a MargaRANT, we promise!! How do you become the Yo-Yo Ma of knife-wielders? THis and MORE on the SooperPodcast this week!! Listen NOW!!

THIS WEEK!! We're still not over how that other podcast was troll-shaming us, and we answer the big question, did Jess read the IG report? You already know the answer!! Then we talk about how awesome Amy Barrett is, and it's SMATT with twusted tritter sources, and how John Ekdahl cabbage-smashed the media on a twitter tirade, and why Jess is always gonna hate SOoper just a lil!! Also how the media LIED about the Capitol Gazette killer, and why Yassssica is terrorized by fireworks. Finally, libidinous spirit of a virgin chef movies, and will you LOOK at the EYEHOLES!!?! You have to listen NOW!!

THIS WEEK!!! We try to catch up on missing a podcast last week, but we don't because we're ADHD!! We don't have gerilla-Matt this week, he was suspended but you have to listen to find out why!! Then we have a super-special secret guest who tells us about real life immigration and how the media LIES about communists and the right-wing militant dictators who persecute them!! WOW!! Also el sooper soopsplains how Google is youth-privileging, and the guest brown-shames el Sooper and then another podcast civility-shames our podcast, and we feel guilty and Chris Matthews attacks poor little mousey Steve Kornacki!! It's the best podcast everrrr!!! ALso the worst, go listen.

THIS WEEK we talk about all the crazy goings-on, including a moment by moment account of the great triumph of leader Trump in North Korea!! WOW! We have Matt and the girl, and they talk about all sorts of things. El Sooper goes on another rant at the end, but it's not tequila-fueled this time, also is Kimberly Guilfoyle in Mencha? I ain't never metcha!! Also Matt talks about his plantation, and el Sooper SHOOTS DOWN all the dumb hot takes people have about the division of Californy. It's a good' ol rootin' tootin' time!! You have to go listen NOW!!!

This WEEK el Matt SOUTHsplains why southerners get into their little boats to go greet the hurricanes when they attack!!! And then el Sooper clearly mishears what Matt says because he makes absolutely no sense whatsoever about mudslides and controlled fires. And BTJess forces us all to thank Kim Kardashian?!? Also a little hurlbutt and el Sooper disabuses Matt of fake news about George H.W. Bush and pecans and pea cans and how Andrea MITCHELL did the exact same thing to Mitt Romney!! Then el Sooper GOES NUTS on Sharon Bream on Fox News because she lied about the Eagles and it’s really not cool and it’s deesgusteeng!! Three times it is!! WOw you have to listen right now!!

THIS WEEK the regular gang gets together yet again to drunkenly stumble through the stories of the week!! We go over how Roseanne completely imploded and then how Samantha Bee utterly and completely imploded!! FUN! Then the yanny-lovin’ animals talk on Ambien and booze about Tomi Lahren then it gets a LEETLE AWKWARD (you’ll know when it happens), and then did you know that Roseanne was a part of the Q-Anon conspiracy?! OMG!! Even she didn’t know it. ALSO we talk about why being called Ren and Stimpy is a leeetle bit racially insensitive. Ahem. Kinda. Finally, life is shabby without you baaaaby!!! YES!! You must listen!!!

THIS WEEK Matt gets Biblical on your butts!! EL Sooper doesn't like his Shakespeare joke however, and then Jess keeps Jesssplaining K-Pop boy bands that are heart-throbs for women like Jess. ALSO el Sooper soopsplains WHY he KNEW that North Korea would come crawling back to the negotiation table and he actually praises Trump OMG what happened to him I hate him now!! Matt has a business-history moment and el Sooper has an addendum about the black plague, and then he enlightens us all about why little girls like the Royal Wedding!! Now let's all hurlbutt this new podcast. WOW!!