Mom Enough: A Parenting Podcast

We’ve known that adversity and trauma in childhood have long-term effects on mental health and well-being. But in recent years, groundbreaking research on adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) has demonstrated the long-term consequences for physical health, including heart disease, lung disease and cancer.   As a pediatrician, Dr. Nadine Burke Harris confronted the effects of early trauma in a 7-year-old patient and that changed the course of her medical practice and her life. Don’t miss Dr. Burke Harris’s impassioned – and hopeful – conversation with Marti & Erin in this week’s Mom Enough show.   Reflecting on this Mom Enough discussion of adverse childhood experiences (ACEs), what do you think we can do as individuals to buffer the effects of adversity for our children and ourselves? In what ways could health care providers (and the system as a whole) apply this knowledge about ACEs more effectively with both child and adult patients?   For Dr. Burke Harris’s book, click here. For Dr. Burke Harris’s Ted Talk, click here. For the Center for Youth Wellness, click here. For our What is Toxic Stress? sheet, click here. For our Understanding the Biology of Stress in Young Children sheet, click here. For our interview with Dr. Megan Gunnar on toxic stress, click here.

What is the role of parents in education and what can we do to support our children’s school success? How can we tell if our children’s school is meeting their educational needs? And what is our part in building effective family-school partnerships to optimize the learning experience for our child and others?   Jim Baumann has been a teacher, a member of his local school board and state board of education and the leader of a billion-dollar business. Jim brings that experience, along with lessons he’s learned as the father of three children, to his thoughtful conversation with Marti in this week’s episode of Mom Enough.   In what ways do you support your child’s school success, both at home and in your interactions with educators at your child’s school? Reflecting on this week’s Mom Enough discussion of the role of parents in education, what further steps could you take to build an even stronger partnership with teachers and administrators at your child’s school?   For Jim's website, click here. For Jim's book, click here. For our Supporting Your Children's School Success tip sheet, click here.

In today’s world, STEM skills (science, technology, engineering and math skills) are hugely important to academic success and career prospects. Yet, as parents, many of us are at a loss as to how to support our children’s STEM learning, especially if we think we lack those crucial skills ourselves.   But this week’s Mom Enough guest, Yvonne Ng, brings a fresh and encouraging perspective on STEM skills. An engineer, educator and mom, she helps us see STEM in the world around us and ignite our children’s curiosity, discovery, experimentation and problem-solving from the earliest years of life.   In what ways did this Mom Enough show help you see STEM learning as something more accessible to you and your child? Based on what you heard, what kinds of things could you do with your child to promote hands-on STEM experiences, whatever his or her age?   For toys and games to develop STEM in informal ways as well as links to relevant resources, click here.

How many hours have you spent driving your kids to games and practice for their various youth sports activities? What are your expectations and hopes about what your children will gain from their participation? Better health and fitness? Character development? A scholarship or big money?   Dr. Nicole LaVoi is Senior Lecturer in Kinesiology, Co-Director of the Tucker Center for Research on Girls & Women in Sport and Co-Founder of the Minnesota Youth Sport Research Consortium. She joins Marti for this lively discussion about youth sports, questioning many assumptions, calling out unhelpful parental behavior and challenging us to step up and use proven approaches to help our children reap optimal benefits of organized sports.   Did you recognize any of your own parenting behaviors in the things Nicole said parents should not do? What were the most important things Nicole said parents should do?   For the U of M’s College of Education and Human Development, click here. For Nicole's Being a Good Sport Parent Mom Enough interview, click here. For Nicole's One Sport Voice blog, click here. For Nicole's Paradox, Pitfalls, & Parity: Where Have all the Women Coaches Gone? video, click here. For more information about the National Girls & Women in Sports Day, click here. For the Women Coaches Symposium 2018, click here. For The Aspen Institute's The State of Play report, click here. For the Children & Nature Network, click here. For At All Costs, click here.

Language skills are essential to academic learning, positive relationships and clear thinking. Parents have a crucial role in promoting language development in children through simple, everyday interactions from infancy to adulthood, whether or not English is the primary language at home and whether or not a child is bilingual.   Dr. Maria Sera, who has spent her adult life studying language development in children at the U of M’s Institute of Child Development, brings research-based information to help you provide the solid language foundation your child needs.   What do you think was the most important message or tip Dr. Sera provided? What did you hear that surprised you in the discussion of language development in children?   For the U of M’s College of Education and Human Development, click here. For Dr. Sera’s Language and Cognitive Development Laboratory, click here. For Colorín Colorado resources (a website for English language learners), click here. For OneAmerica's resources for parents speaking their home language with their children, click here. For more about The 30 Million Word Gap, click here. For Patricia Kuhl's TED talk on The linguistic genius of babies, click here. For an Early Language Development tip sheet, click here. For a Supporting Second Language Development tip sheet, click here.

Grief is a natural and dynamic response to a major loss and, for people of all ages, it demands time and understanding. But with grief in children, it doesn’t always look the way we expect. Children sometimes may appear irreverent or disrespectful – or they may be unbearably sad one minute and dashing out to play with friends the next. Grief also may sweep over a child years after a loss, taking on new meaning at a new stage of the child’s development, especially for a child who has lost a parent or other very close family member.   In this week’s Mom Enough show, Coral Popowitz from Children’s Grief Connection joins Marti & Erin for a rich discussion of grief in children informed by Coral’s years of experience supporting children and families through grief.   Do you have a child or know a child who has lost a parent or other close family member or friend? How did that child express his or her grief at the time of the loss? Over the following months or years? How does that fit with what you heard in this week’s Mom Enough discussion about the different ways children grieve?   For camps, programs and grief resources, click here. For the NASP's Death and Grief resource sheet, click here.

Have you ever heard someone say about a baby or toddler, “It’s a good thing that trauma happened before he was aware of it.” Unfortunately, that is a very misleading statement. Long before babies have words, they can experience stress and trauma and remember it in their bodies and brains, often with lasting negative effects on their social-emotional development. But the good news is that sensitive, responsive, predictable parenting can be a powerful buffer against trauma.   Paula Frisk, Senior Director of Birth to Age 5 Home Visiting at St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development, joins Marti for an important discussion of what parents can do to protect their children, what parents need for themselves and what therapeutic resources are available for parents and infants who need help with social-emotional development.   How does a secure parent-child attachment protect a young child when a very upsetting experience is unavoidable? What factors can make it hard for parents to provide that sensitive, responsive care? How has this played out in your own life, as a parent and as a former child?   To learn more about the Harman Center for Child & Family Wellbeing, click here. For our Parent’s Role in Emotional Development sheet, click here. For early childhood intervention services in Hennepin County, click here. For our positive stress and toxic stress interview with Dr. Megan Gunnar, click here. For our What is Toxic Stress? sheet, click here. For our Understanding the Biology of Stress in Young Children sheet, click here.

As parents, many of us have been concerned about the incivility that has become so common in politics, media and public conversation and behavior. How can we teach our children civility – to be polite, respectful and empathic when they are surrounded with examples of adults doing the opposite? How can we help our children learn to think before they speak, reflecting on the possible impact of their words and actions?   Dr. Abi Gewirtz, professor of Child Psychology and Family Social Science at the University of Minnesota, joins Marti for a heartfelt discussion of this important topic.   Have you talked with your children about the idea of civility? Do they notice that many public figures don’t behave in the way you want them to behave? What ideas did you get from this Mom Enough discussion about how you could approach this subject with your children of different ages?   For the U of M’s College of Education and Human Development, click here. For Putting a Stop to Bullying, click here. For Fostering Compassionate Children, click here.

As moms, most of us give a lot of thought to deciding to be employed or to be an at-home mother. We may seek input from family, friends and books, even as pervasive media images of “having it all” also seep into our thinking. But what is known about the effects of a mother’s employment status on her children’s well-being and her own? Is there a “holy grail” of work status for mothers today? And, if not, what factors are most important in helping us make the best choice for our families and us?   Dr. Deborah Kahn addressed these questions in her doctoral thesis and expanded the ideas in her book, The Roads Taken. You’ll want to chime in on her lively discussion with Marti & Erin in this week’s Mom Enough!   After you had your first child, were you employed or at home caring for your child? Why did you make the choice you made? Has your decision been the same or different with subsequent children? Whatever your choices, based on this discussion with Deborah Kahn, how do you think your situation worked for you and for your children? Why?   For Marti’s 2005 survey study of mothers, click here.

It can be difficult to think toddlers are terrific when they are throwing a tantrum at the grocery store, rejecting the fancy new potty chair you bought or shouting “No!” in response to nearly every request you make. But the toddler period really is a time of extraordinary learning and development, and even the most annoying behaviors signal some of those exciting changes.   Judy Schumacher is a family educator, mom, grandma and author of the newly released Terrific Toddlers! She joins Marti for a rich discussion of how to understand your toddler’s behavior and guide her or him to use all that energy and newfound independence in more constructive ways.   Why do you think tantrums and negativism are so common in toddlers? What is the developmental meaning of those behaviors? What practical tips or helpful principles did you get from this Mom Enough discussion of terrific toddlers?

Did you know that being less materialistic is associated with greater happiness? Nathan Dungan, founder of Share Save Spend and Mom Enough’s go-to source on kids and money, builds on previous research in a new study that shows how a 3-part learning intervention reduced materialism and increased self-esteem for adolescents who participated.   Nathan joins Marti & Erin for a lively discussion about how to promote good values around money, how to give your kids choices and a voice in spending decisions even at a very young age, and how your children will benefit longterm from these practices. Marti & Erin are eager to try Nathan’s tips, and you will be too!   How do you involve your children in spending decisions? Based on what you heard in this Mom Enough discussion of materialistic teens, what concrete steps could you take to teach your children the value of money and good values about how to share, save and spend?   For Money Sanity U, click here. For the Scientific American story, click here. For The New York Times feature story, click here.

Dr. Daheia Barr-Anderson has spent her career trying to untangle the individual, family and community factors that contribute to overweight children and adolescents and childhood obesity. An assistant professor in the U of M’s College of Education and Human Development (Department of Kinesiology), Daheia has put that research into practice in family-focused interventions, including an innovative mother-daughter intervention with African-American girls and their moms.   Tune into Daheia’s interesting and informative conversation with Marti & Erin on childhood obesity to learn what matters most and to think about how small changes can lead to big differences in the health of your children and you!   Think about your own family’s patterns of eating and physical activity. What aspects of your lifestyle, your relationships and your neighborhood support or hinder you and your children from maintaining a healthy weight? What small steps could you take to bring about healthy change?   For a study on family-focused physical activity, diet, and obesity interventions, click here. For the U of M’s College of Education and Human Development, click here.

These days it’s hard to miss the message about the importance of having books in our homes and reading to our children even before they can talk. But, with homework, busy after-school schedules and the seductiveness of all kinds of screen time, how can we keep our children reading for fun? In what ways do our own reading habits influence our kids? Who else influences our kids’ reading choices? And what are some specific books – or types of books – children are excited about right now?   Liza Baker, Executive Editorial Director in the Scholastic book publishing division, joins Marti & Erin for an information-packed discussion of survey results from the Kids & Family Reading Report (and maybe even some holiday shopping ideas!).   How interested are your children in reading for pleasure? What ideas did you get from this Mom Enough discussion about things you can do to help your kids develop or sustain a love of books? Were you surprised by any survey results from the Kids & Family Reading Report?   For the Kids & Family Reading Report, click here. For 5 Things Kids & Parents Want in Children's Books, click here. For Scholastic's holiday gift guide for birth to age 17, click here. For 10 Tips for Supporting Your Child in Reading and Writing, click here. For Book Lists for Read-Alouds and Independent Reading, click here. For tips on getting your child to read at home, click here.

Conversations about juggling work and family often revolve around challenges faced by moms who are employed outside the home. But a study at Boston College’s Center for Work and Family is changing the conversation, with findings that highlight how some fathers are facing similar struggles as they take on increasing responsibility at home and still strive to succeed in their careers.   Dr. Brad Harrington, Executive Director of the BC Center and lead investigator on the study, joins Marti & Erin for this provocative discussion of what is happening in the lives of many American fathers today.   In your own family, how is childrearing divided between mom and dad? What about other aspects of household work? How is juggling work and family shaped by the amount and type of out-of-home employment for each parent? What would you change and what would you keep the same about the way childrearing and household tasks are distributed in your family?   To read the results of Boston College Center for Work & Family’s study of The New Dad, click here. To read more about the research findings, click here.

The quantity and quality of sleep a person gets is important to health, safety and well-being at every age. But recent research highlights the unique sleep needs of adolescents and the high cost when those needs are not met – from poorer school performance to depression to greater risk of car accidents and more.   Kyla Wahlstrom, Senior Research Fellow at the University of Minnesota, has studied this issue for more than 20 years, including a recently completed 3-year study with the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. She joins Marti & Erin for a lively discussion of what parents can do to ensure adolescents get the sleep they need and to make the case for why later school start times are an important part of the equation.   What did you learn in this Mom Enough interview about how and why later school start times (after 8:30 am) are so important for adolescents? If your district has early school start times and is not likely to change them, what steps can you and your family take to improve the amount and quality of your children’s sleep?   For Start School Later, click here. For a study on the impact of later high school start times, click here. For the U of M’s College of Education and Human Development, click here.