Mom Enough: A Parenting Podcast

Studies have shown that parents are likely either to warn their daughters away from challenging physical activities or to help them so much that they don’t accomplish the task on their own. With sons, however, parents are more likely to “be brave” and to guide them in how to complete the task on their own. Caroline Paul believes we too often undermine girls’ competence and self-esteem and deprive them of exhilarating adventures. So she’s written a unique guidebook for girls (and women!) that is packed with stories of her own adventures and those of other daring women, practical tips on changing a tire or climbing a mountain, entertaining illustrations by Wendy McNaughton and space for the reader to journal about her own escapades. She brings her ideas to life in this enthusiastic conversation with Marti, who describes a few adventures of her own!   What messages did you get as a girl about taking on challenging or somewhat risky activities? To what extent are your messages to your daughter the same or different? Would you like to encourage your daughter to be more adventurous? And would you like to have some lively adventures yourself? How could you begin?   For Caroline's New York Times article, click here. For the official website for The Gutsy Girl, click here.

Caroline Greene was a self-described over-achiever, attending the best schools, becoming a successful attorney and marrying a man she calls “a saint.” But when she became a mother, she found herself empty of passion, struggling to find the love and joy she had expected to feel as a new mom. Wisely seeking therapy, Caroline not only got help for postpartum depression but began to peel away the messages and expectations with which she had grown up, discovering a new vision of a career (a life!) that was right for her and her family. Caroline brings her story of finding meaningful work to this week’s Mom Enough show, a story that may inspire you to reflect on the ways in which you are and are not following your heart.   Think about the life you are living – work, family, friends, activities that bring you health and joy. To what extent is this the life you want for yourself and your family? To what extent are you silencing your inner voice to meet someone else’s expectations? What steps could you take to change that? What would be meaningful work for you?   For Caroline's blog, click here.

Kate Hopper’s mission is to shine light on authentic writing by gifted authors who are mothers. An accomplished author herself, Kate brings writers to The Loft Literary Center each year to read their work, revealing rich and profound stories within the everyday lives of mothers. This year’s Motherhood & Words event features: Sherrie Fernandez-Williams reading from Soft, a raw and beautiful memoir of rising above poverty and a destructive marriage to find strength, hope and a fresh understanding of who she is; Andria Williams, whose compelling novel, The Longest Night, draws on Andria’s experience as a military wife to take us back to the nuclear threats, secrecy and gender constraints of the 1960s; and Kate Hopper reading from an essay about her struggle with a puzzling illness and the insights she gained about her coping strategies, as reflected in the eyes of her young daughter.   Listening to the readings by these three authors, what resonated for you in terms of your own experiences as a mother? What do you see as the greatest value in hearing or reading other mothers’ stories?   For Kate’s website, click here. For Sherrie’s website, click here. For Andria’s website, click here. For Motherhood & Words, click here.

You probably remember the challenges of your own adolescence – on-again, off-again friendships, emotional highs and lows, worries about body image, anxiety about school, life and love. In today’s fast-paced world – and with both the opportunities and threats of ever-present technology – the stakes seem even higher for our teenage girls. In her new book Untangled, psychologist Lisa Damour, mom of two daughters and Director of Laurel School’s Center for Research on Girls, provides a rich framework for understanding the transitions teenage girls face on the path to adulthood. Don’t miss her wisdom and practical guidance in this Mom Enough interview!   What are some of the major challenges your adolescent daughter confronts today? How do these issues tie to the seven transitions Lisa Damour described in this Mom Enough discussion? How have you tried to guide your daughter through these challenges and how might you improve your response?   For Untangled, click here. For a discussion guide for Untangled, click here.

The teen (and tween) years are a time of major change in our children’s bodies and brains. Along with some of the wonderful growth in reasoning ability and independence comes a necessary challenging of parents’ ideas and authority. This often leaves parents feeling frustrated and unsure how to provide the guidance and protection our sons and daughters still need, especially in light of the risky behavior that is so tempting to adolescents. Psychologist David Walsh, author of Why Do They Act That Way, joins Marti & Erin for an enlightening discussion of what’s happening in the teenage brain and how that helps explain behavior. And he affirms the importance of staying closely connected even when teens seem to push us away.   What did you learn in this Mom Enough discussion of the teenage brain that helped you understand the behavior of adolescents in your family or community? What creative ways can you think of to help teens find the thrills they desire in ways that are safe and positive?

Turning your teen loose with the family car is an anxious moment for most of us parents – and for good reason, given that car accidents are the number one cause of death for people 15 – 19 years of age. But the good news is we have a much greater impact on teen driving habits than we often realize. Gordy Pehrson, Youth Traffic Safety Coordinator for the Minnesota Department of Public Safety (Office of Traffic Safety), has the information we all need to help our children become the safest drivers they can be. His important message should empower all of us to know the laws governing teen driving and to go beyond the law in setting clear expectations and limits – and being a clear example – for our children.   What new information did you learn in this Mom Enough show about laws for teen driving? What ideas did you get for being a strong parent in ensuring that your child drives responsibly? Whatever the age of your child, what can you do now to help him or her learning safe driving habits?   For a parent’s role in developing a safe teen driver, click here. For the Parent/Teen Driver Awareness Class outline and discussion guide, click here. For a driving contract between a teen and parent, click here. For register your teen driver for a collision avoidance class, click here.

Thanks to new research, it is becoming easier to identify autism spectrum disorder at earlier ages than ever before. Although parents understandably may fear having their child identified as having special needs, early identification and intervention greatly improve a child’s chances for lifelong success and wellbeing. Dr. Jennifer Hall-Lande, autism researcher at the U of M’s Institute of Community Integration, joins Marti & Erin to help parents understand the process of developmental screening, assessment and intervention, highlighting the value of Help Me Grow as a source of information and support for parents of all young children. (A special thanks to Help Me Grow for supporting this important show and for being an ongoing partner of Mom Enough.)   Why is a “wait and see” approach not a good idea for a child who is presenting signs of a possible autism spectrum disorder? What did you learn in this Mom Enough show about assessment and early intervention with children with ASD?   To access Help Me Grow's developmental resources, click here. For CDC's Learn the Signs. Act Early. developmental monitoring tools, click here. For Minnesota Act Early, click here. For ME's early signs of ASD interview with Jed Elison, click here.

Have you or someone you know experienced depression or serious anxiety since becoming a mom? Given the prevalence of these mental health problems among mothers, your answer almost certainly is yes. Yet too often these disorders go undiagnosed and untreated. It’s important for all of us to understand the signs of maternal depression and anxiety, safe and effective treatment options and how family and friends can help. Psychiatrist Michelle Wiersgalla and psychologist Gabrielle Mauren from Park Nicollet Behavioral Health join Marti & Erin for an informative and candid discussion everyone should hear.   What has your experience been in your family or circle of friends with depression, anxiety or OCD? Why do you think maternal depression and anxiety still are so unlikely to be properly diagnosed or treated among the many mothers (and others) who experience them? What can you do to help reduce the stigma associated with mental health problems?   For Park Nicollet Women's Center, click here. For the U.S. Preventative Services recommendation for depression screening, click here.

At every age, children vary greatly in how they make friends, keep friends and handle challenges such as conflict, bullying, rejection or bad influence. So, to what extent can effective, positive social skills be taught? And what is the appropriate role of parents in helping children build these important life skills? Camie Christenson, Program Director at St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development, brings wisdom and practical strategies to this week’s lively and heartfelt discussion of how to help your child make friends and be a friend.   How does your child usually approach other children when meeting them for the first time? What challenges has your child faced in getting along with peers? What ideas did you hear in this Mom Enough discussion about how you might help your child strengthen his or her social skills?   For 5 tips for helping your child make new friends, click here. For Marti's advice on expressing your concerns when you disapprove of your child's friend, click here.

Although a majority of moms are employed during their childrearing years, many of us still experience a nagging concern that our children some day will look back on their childhood and feel short-changed. But a recent study by business leader and mother Pam Lenehan shines light on the overwhelmingly positive views of adult children reflecting on their moms’ work and the impact it had on their development. Pam presents these findings in her book, My Mother, My Mentor: What Grown Children of Working Mothers Want You to Know, the springboard for a lively and personal discussion with Marti & Erin in this week’s Mom Enough show.   What has your experience been with motherhood and employment, both in your childhood and as a parent? What do you think about the positive effects of being working mothers as described by participants in Pam Lenehan’s study?   To read about the Harvard Business School study mentioned, click here.

When Kerry Larson decided to embrace the idea of cleaner, healthier living, he didn’t do it halfway. He and his family not only changed their ways, but Kerry also set out to create the kind of grocery business that would help other families make similar changes, especially in communities that had few such options. In this week’s Mom Enough show, Kerry and colleague Chris Knutson from Fresh & Natural Foods share their stories with Marti & Erin.   This week’s Mom Enough guests talked about the importance of incremental changes (small steps) in helping your family move toward healthier ways of eating and living. What small changes could you initiate in food choices and activity level for you and your children? What would help you make and sustain those changes?   For suggested recipes from Fresh & Natural Foods, click here.

When parents divorce, children typically experience a wide range of feelings, including loss, sadness, fear, anger and anxiety. These feelings come out in different ways, depending on age, personality and circumstances. But there are many things parents and other caring adults can do to help children cope and even thrive beyond this challenging time. Child psychologist Dr. Jordan Hart joins Marti & Erin for a rich discussion of children and divorce, a topic that affects so many children and families.   What have you experienced or observed about children and divorce in your family or circle of friends? What were some of the most important points in this week’s Mom Enough discussion and how do those match your own experience or observations of children and divorce?   To learn more about the Bridging Parental Conflict® class, click here. To learn more about the Managing in the Middle class for children, click here.

A wealth of research highlights the importance of fathers to the development of both sons and daughters. Yet many women say they don’t really know their fathers very well and/or they often feel criticized by their fathers. In situations of divorce or separation, these issues often are even more pronounced. But, as Wake Forest professor Linda Nielsen knows from her research on the relationship of fathers and daughters, there are steps adult daughters can take to put their relationship with their fathers on a more positive path. And, dads, whether your daughter is a toddler, teen or adult, you can build a closer more supportive relationship with her. However the father-daughter relationships play out in your family, you will find this Mom Enough discussion insightful and encouraging!   How would you describe your relationship with your father in your childhood? How is it now that you are grown up and a parent yourself? Based on what you heard in this Mom Enough interview on the relationships of fathers and daughters, what steps could you take to strengthen your relationship with your father? What could you do to support positive relationships between your children and their father?

One caring, supportive adult can make all the difference in the life of a young person who is struggling or living in high-risk circumstances. But all children can benefit from an adult who invests time to teach them new skills or help them discover new possibilities. (Chances are you know this from your own life!) This week’s Mom Enough guest is Dr. Lindsey Weiler, a University of Minnesota professor and therapist who studies why and how mentoring matters, as well as the qualities of the most effective mentors. Whether you are looking for a mentor or are considering becoming one, this discussion is for you.   What experience have you had with mentoring, formal or informal, as a mentor or the one being mentored? How did your experience match what this week’s Mom Enough guest identified as important qualities for an effective mentor?   For the Mentoring Partnership of Minnesota, click here. To locate a mentor in Minnesota, click here. For the National Mentoring Partnership, click here. To locate a mentor in your state, click here. For the National Mentoring Resource Center, click here.

For many of us moms, one of the lingering problems after childbirth is bladder leakage when we cough or sneeze or – heaven forbid – jump on a trampoline! Other problems, including prolapsed uterus or, especially as we age, bowel leakage, also may cause discomfort and embarrassment. But, as Dr. Beth Frankman from Park Nicollet Women’s Center explains on Mom Enough, there are effective ways to prevent or treat these uro-gynecological problems. Tune in to hear this reassuring and helpful information – and some candid confessions from Marti & Erin!   Have you experienced bladder leakage or any of the uro-gynecological problems discussed in this week’s Mom Enough show? What did you learn that was reassuring or helpful? What steps might you take to address the problems you have experienced?   To read more about urinary incontinence in women, click here. For Park Nicollet Women's Center, click here.