Wait Wait, What's Icing?

We start out with the more upsetting side of recent hockey news this episode (There's a warning at the start, and you can skip to 11:40 if you want to avoid it altogether.) After that we deal with off-season boredom with a lot of off-topic rambling. Topics include the NWHL landing on the moon as the CWHL sells black market syrup, Patriotism with a capital P, a brilliant new Dumbledore inspired way to start hockey games, and the most gloriously majestic athletic achievement of Mollyhall's life.  In conclusion, when, oh when will our sport game come back from the war?

An extra frickin long podcast today as we finally share our hot trade takes with the world. Having finally emotionally recovered enough for a rational discussion (aka stopped crying into long enough to say real words) we talk trades from little matters like Saad and Kessel to the vastly more newsworthy Brandon Sutter to the Canucks move. Before we get to trades, though, there's a plethora of NWHL news to discuss, and we all go on #KnightWatch.  All that, plus we answer questions from you, our dearly beloved listeners. 

Escape the horrifying roller coaster that is Free Agency Day with a quick jaunt back to comforting, weirdly less dramatic than anticipated memories of draft day. We talk our attempt to marry a podcast, an overview of the NHL's annual divvying up of teenage boys, what in the world is going on on Boston, and some more expansion thoughts. It's not you, it's us, Vegas!  This episode is in no way out of date 48 hours after we recorded it! (This is all your fault, NHL GMs.) 

It's an All Blackhawks Stanley Cup Special Episode of What's Icing! We're asking the tough questions: Will Mollyhall successfully not murder any Hawks fans this off season? Is Duncan Keith underrated? (Okay, probably not.) How many members of the Blackhawks roster still think Miley Cyrus came to watch them practice? All that plus Blackhawks Fairy Kat tells the Michal Rozsival of jokes.

Thanks to technical difficulties, you get just what everyone is clamoring for: Discussion of the NHL Conference Finals a week after they've both ended! Hooray!  Once you've recovered from those piping hot takes, it's on to the NHL's yearly hunger games/prospect combine, exciting NWHL news, whether or not Gary Bettman is going to relocate the CWHL to Texas, and what exactly a "slad" is.  Finally we get our Quebecois on answering questions from listeners. All that as we continue to pronounce "Toronto" in the most American way possible. 

We've kicked Mollyhall out of the room and replaced her with friend of the podcast Montana this episode so that we can talk all the Blackhawks we want without any aggrieved sighing in the background. Hurray!  After that it's Conference finals drama, #BabcockWatch, NWHL free agent camps,  and Ella adds to her hockey expert credentials by mispronouncing Connor Hellebuyck and accidentally calling Ondrej Pavelec "Ondrej Palat." All that plus we cram in some last minute CBJ Captain jokes before the issue is finally put to rest tomorrow morning. RIP Best Hockey Joke Ever.

We start a rescue fund for poor, downtrodden Connor McDavid, discuss just who the Sharknado of sports journalism is, we both break out our world famous old man impressions again (we know you've all been waiting for this day), Ella finally realizes what everyone in the entire world figured out about McDavid and Eichel about two years ago, and we answer questions from YOU our beloved and exceedingly patient listeners. 

This week, friend of the podcast The Blackhawks Fairy makes an appearance to bring us her hockey blessings and be rude about Corey Perry. We also talk NWHL, the CWHL, Hilary Knight and, as naturally follows, the ills of global capitalism. To conclude, we share some of our playoff superstitions, predictions, and anxieties, and The Blackhawks Fairy asks the question: is there any way that Mollyhall will ever love the Blackhawks? (No.) Also, Ella made the mistake of giving Mollyhall the reigns on editing this week, so you can all be treated to her "Rocky, but if Rocky was a Bullfighter" impression, and 4 straight minutes of Ella ranting furiously about how horoscopes aren’t real. Happy playoffs, everybody. May the puck be with you.

We're back from the dead (Mostly. We're still a little bit dead.) and talking the Clarkson Cup finals (finally) and the NHL trade deadline (even more finally.)  Along the line Mollyhall outs herself as a dirty capitalist pig and Ella counters by burning patchouli and trying to become one with Mother Earth. Somehow it's all David Clarkson's fault.  All that plus five ways to tank your way to success!

Today we go from jock straps to ethics in hockey journalism in the blink of an eye, so our apologies in advance.  Highlights include: A debate on what exactly concave and convex mean, John Tavares to Toronto?, and whether Patrick Wah and Patrick Roy are two different, equally angry people.  

There's drama across Canada as Evander Kane ends up with soggy trackies, plus the Habs are the Nickelodeon teen drama to the The Maple Leafs CW episodic hot mess.  We're also talking trades, Tyler Seguin quietly car jacking Phil Kessel, our friend the Toronna Maple Leaf Don Fanuf, and the ever broken Beau Bennett.  Finally we outline the top five trades we really want to happen this season, and remind everyone that a family can be just two podcasters and PK Subban. 

On this week's episode we intend to recap All-Star Game weekend and end up talking about Phil Kessel for a solid twenty minutes. No one is entirely sure how that happened, to be honest. Also, Jonathan Toews holds a grudge against Gary Bettman, Ella accidentally slut shames the Stanley Cup, and Alex Ovechkin is magic on a big stage. Finally, we go through the top five things we missed about real hockey during All-Star Game weekend, which somehow culminates in sadness and geese. 

This week we're talking the All-Star Game, a new contract in Columbus, and some more of our favorite NHL stories throughout the years. (Fun preview: Sidney Crosby naked in an elevator!) We also yell at our new friend Straw Businessman, get just a little bit intense about Nick Foligno's fancy stats, debate whether Jeff Carter will show his face in Columbus if he gets named as an All-Star, and remind everyone that there are no Sherpas in hockey. 

Montana has successfully trapped Molly in a cupboard and replaced her for today's episode where we talk mumps, illnesses that are totally and completely "not" the mumps, the benefits of trading for cupless Slovaks, hilarious and hilariously stupid CWHL players, and five things that could have reasonably been growing out of Sidney Crosby's face. 

 A very serious discussion on the appropriate use of hockey butts. I'm gonna be honest with you, butts make up a solid 50% of this episode. (The question of the day isn't actually "could a hockey player open a beer bottle with his posterior" but we welcome your input, regardless.) Our discussion later grows to include other aspects of anatomy/NHL mascots. Yes, we mean CBJ's beloved Boomer (RIP) We also talk which franchise Gary Bettman - sorry we mean the "totally unrigged draft lottery" - is going to give Connor McDavid, how many people are gonna make drunken fools of themselves at the All-Star Game this year, and a few letters from you!