Vince Tracy's Podcasts

There is a move afoot to cease sending people to prison for sentences less than 6 months.....naturally this has been received with mixed opinions......but unless you have been closely involved with the prison system....having either been inside or knowing someone who has it is impossible to know what it's like.....it's very easy to say "they deserve it" but everyone is different......whereas one criminal may be non-violent another may be the opposite....and you can't legislate for the latter as they are probably incurable. 2.I watched a programme on Les Dawson's life.....it simply showed what a comedy genius he was....and there was another programme on Bob Monkhouse....again a very clever man.....it's such a shame that stand up comedy has lost its way.....however it hasn't completely vanished as we still have the likes of "Would I Lie to you" and "Room 101" with the likes of Frank Skinner....Lee Mac and Rob Brydon who are very funny so there is still hope......and speaking of comedy someone put a picture of Prince Edward sitting with his wife in a horse drawn carriage with a long line of medals on his chest.....it was suggested he must have had an exciting time in very short time he was in the Marines.......surely this could be construed as impersonating a soldier?....still I suppose his mum loves him. 3.Forget the problems throughout the world.....the news headlines have been taken over by Andy Murray's sore hip.....he was interviewed and broke down in tears.....it could be the end of his career!!!!....what will he do??....apart from joining the overpaid TV pundit fraternity...and perhaps opening a tennis school...not to mention making TV adverts...and putting his name to tennis gear....what will he do?....oh I feel so sorry for the poor chap............................and on the subject of TV there is a new programme called "The Greatest Dancer" which is another past it's sell by date format.....the programme is bad enough with the talentless Cheryl Cole on the judging panel but on come these hopefuls who want to become dancing stars with the camera shot constantly flitting between them and the judges and the audience....so the viewer misses most of the moves.....the producer should go back to taking holiday snaps.....same old tripe. 4.As I said last week we are a nation of moaners and complainers yet most people don't know what REAL problems are.....I support an organisation called The Cheshire Cats which is based in Wallasey in Wirral and we raise money for sick and underprivileged kids through our weekly jam sessions.........a collection of vintage rockers from the 60s play rock and roll classics to an enthusiastic loyal crowd and all the money raised goes to various charities.....we have recently given £3000 to a children's hospice called Claire House on Wirral which will make a difference to youngsters lives.......it is one of many donations we have made to them over the years.....when you visit the likes of these places with the wonderful staff you realise the THESE are REAL problems......maybe the moaners should pop in some time....they might learn something. 5.The song this week is one which has been very kind to me.....it is called "Googi The Liverpool Duck" .... it was written for a friend of mine called Penny Page.....who had a ventriloquist act with a very colourful duck.....back in he day my band was sharing a gig with her...she was then known as "Peppy and The Popettes".....Googi being one of the Popettes....and I told her that the duck was the star of her show and I'll knock a song together for her and Googi.........I did this (in a very short time) and gave it to her... four years later she presented me with the record she had made of the song.....she performed it on The Palladium and it was featured in a film called "Priest" sung by a church choir......all from a chance meeting at a gig.

Terry Whitehead joins Neil and Vince for this edition of our weekly podcast.Madrid is currently drawing up contingency plans for its relationship with Britain. Citizens. Spain counts on the largest community of British residents in the EU around 300,000, and a high number of Spaniards living in the UK (116,000). Aviation. Air traffic is a much more complex issue. Beyond the general uncertainty related to a key area for tourism, Spain is faced with the specific problem of Iberia – the former flag carrier is part of the British group IAG, which also includes British Airways........ Trade. The government already has an estimate as to how much it will have to increase its customs resources should there be a hard Brexit. ............... Fishing. In this area, Spain considers the work already done by the EC to have significantly reduced the adverse effects for the Spanish fishermen who are operating in the United Kingdom (there are around 80 boats who fish in British waters). Gibraltar. The issue related to Brexit that has consumed the most diplomatic efforts is the one that the government considers to be the best covered. The Spanish government believes that, even if the general Withdrawal Agreement were to be rejected – the document contains a specific protocol on Gibraltar – the bilateral arrangements that Madrid and London have signed up to relating to the British Overseas Territory would remain in force.............. SPAIN’S Maritime Rescue Service has reportedly saved 549 migrants trying to cross the Mediterranean Sea this weekend. ......... The European Union’s border agency revealed on Friday that 57,000 illegal immigrants reached Spain last year, double the figure for 2017. Citizens of Morocco accounted for 19% of the 28,572 undocumented migrant arrivals in 2017, while Algerians represented 17%, according to Interior Ministry FOUR men have been arrested on suspicion of videotaping the assault of a young women who was allegedly drugged and raped on New Year’s Eve........ ....... The Guardia Civil suspects there may have been ‘similar aggressions on at least two other occasions and with different girls’, and believe ‘more cases will arise’ in the course of the investigation........The Town Council of Callosa d’En Sarria, where the alleged offence took place, has expressed its ‘strongest condemnation and rejection of the alleged collective sexual aggression suffered by a 19-year-old girl in the town’.... FOUR people were injured and two-hundred evacuated from the Poseidon Playa Hotel in Benidorm, after a 17th floor fire took place on Saturday 5.The incident occurred at approximately 14:30pm after, for unknown reasons, a fire started in of the busiest hotels in Alicante’s Benidorm (Spain). In the UK ...Shocking new footage reveals how far-right protesters screamed abuse in the face of Anna Soubry as MPs urged the police to take action. A selfie video recorded by activist James Goddard shows the group of men crowding around Ms Soubry and blocking her path as she walks alone to the Commons. Did anyone see any protests against the gay tea-time kiss enjoyed by a minister of the cloth in Coronation St? Jeremy Clarkson has launched a bitter tirade against the BBC, claiming it’s now so politically correct men don’t stand a chance of getting top jobs. A Reddit user has shared the extraordinary response he received from a woman he took out after he refused to pay for her dinner despite her lobster and wine costing six times more than his.

It strikes me that we have become a nation of moaners....especially the older generation....you go on Facebook and there they are with the grumbles and outrage about politicians and the way the country is run.....yet no-one does anything about it.....the easiest thing in the world is to criticise .....if you can do better get off you backside and get on with it.....and we seem to be stuck in the past....we keep harping back to the good old days with endless programmes on The Beatles etc....with old guys forming bands and going out with their shades and cowboy hats....and playing for nothing....very strange....coupled with this we have the P.C. brigade...the feminists...and the easily offended telling us what we can and can't say or do...there's only a handful of them so why not just sweep them aside and ignore them?....I certainly do. I watched The Greatest Showman over Xmas....a great film which I thoroughly enjoyed....great songs....also unfortunately Mary Poppins was on.....now I have always been told I look like Dick Van Dyke (can't see it myself) so my son tells my grandson while they are watching it "There's Granddad"....after which I was bombarded with questions from him about Mary Poppins....which I have never seen.......to make matters worse the next day Chitty Bang Bang was on.....which I have never seen...so I faced a lot more difficult questions about that one....my son found it all hilarious.....the nipper will go back to school and tell all the kids his Granddad is a film star..........why did I have to be Dick Van Dyke?....why couldn't I have been The Fonz? I also watched Michael Macintyre who I quite like but his show is becoming very samey....and he had a comic on who sounded like he'd had a comedy by-pass....do people not know what "funny" is these days?.....the P.C. brigade have seen off the ones who could actually make us laugh.....and I noticed Lee Evans was on one of the channels so I had a look to see if he had improved in any way.....'fraid not.....he was dreadful...and after 5 minutes I couldn't take any more.....yet he was playing to a full stadium which says it all......it's a shame that the younger generation don't know what comedy is as they have never seen any. I watched The Voice the other night and they featured Lonnie Donegan's son (I notice you put this up on Facebook)...he was good but are we expected to believe that Tom Jones didn't know him?.....and the job they made of the song Lonnie wrote for Tom....rehearsed or what......"it was meant to be"........Lonnie would now be 87 so he must have had the lad late......we owe a lot to Lonnie who started us all off with skiffle in the late 50s....it gave us the ability to play simple stuff.....eg Tom Dooley only had two chords...........but the problem with talent shows is they are too contrived for my liking.....we have grannie and the family in the wings ...why?....and they go on and get "judged"......they should put acts on who are good enough and give them TV exposure and let them take it from there...."judging" shouldn't come into it....then they would learn the game. The song this week is called "Worrizit?" and is a jingle I wrote back in the day for Debbie Jones on Radio Merseyside......it was a daily competition on her radio programme where the listener would hear a noise and ring in and try and guess what the noise was....it was quite popular at the time.....I have just found this in a drawer in my studio....I haven't heard it for years....sadly it never made the top 20...can't imagine why.....

Spanish politicians from all sides of the political spectrum have reacted to King Felipe VI’s Christmas message, which was broadcast on December 24 and was dedicated in large part to the challenges facing the country’s young people. “You have talent, you believe in peace, you are open to the world because you are, and you feel, European, you are humanitarian, you are committed to social causes, to the fight against climate change and the defense of the environment,” the monarch said in his address. AROUND 300 staff at one of Spain’s biggest airports have staged a month-long walk-out – because it’s too cold to work. Employees with the company Eulen, based at Adolfo Suarez Madrid Barajas airport, claim they are not being provided with warm enough clothing during ‘extreme weather’ and won’t return to work until January 21. The time period during which sex offenders can be brought to justice will start to run from the moment the victim reaches the age of 30, and not 18 as the law in Spain currently dictates. That’s according to one of the proposals that the Spanish Cabinet approved last week in the draft bill of the Integral Protection of Childhood and Adolescence against Violence Law. ….............................................. A FAKE priest who was never ordained has been dismissed from the Catholic Church in Spain after 18 years carrying out weddings and taking confessions. Miguel Angel Ibarra was reportedly found to be an imposter after a complaint was filed in his native country of Colombia, alleging that he had forged his documents. A ‘thorough investigation’ was carried out and it was found he had never been ordained. Brexiteers have slammed Sadiq Khan's 'disgraceful' pro-European Union fireworks display that lit up London's New Year's Eve celebrations but the mayor has stood by his actions. Mr Khan defended his decision to light up the London Eye to resemble the EU flag last night despite coming under heavy criticism. He tweeted: 'Our spectacular #LondonNYE fireworks showed that whatever the outcome of Brexit - #LondonIsOpen - to business, talent, ideas & creativity - and why London really is the greatest city in the world.' Apparently..... There is a migrant crisis on the South coast of England. Under international law, migrants allegedly fleeing oppression are supposed to seek asylum in the first safe country in which they arrive. In one case, that means Serbia. None of them should have any right to settle in Britain. British Transport Police officers are facing more than 12 attacks a week, it has emerged, just hours after one of them was stabbed at Manchester Victoria station. There were 1,939 reported assaults against British Transport Police (BTP) officers in the three years to October 2018, resulting in more than 230 injuries, Freedom of Information requests have shown. ….."Until the justice system fundamentally changes and criminals are actually punished and deterred there is zero point in increasing police numbers. There will just be more of them to attack. Criminals don't care because there's nothing to be worried about from a consequence perspective". The first vegan fish finger is being launched in the high street as supermarkets tap into a radical shift in eating habits –away from meat, dairy and fish. It is claimed more young people will give up meat in January – as part of the Veganuary campaign –

.I was beginning to wonder what Bradley Walsh does in his spare time...then I realised he doesn't have any....because he is NEVER off the television......last Saturday for example....3.30 The Chase with Bradley Walsh....8.oo The London Studios with contributions from various celebs including....you guessed it...Bradley Walsh....9.00 Bradley Walsh presents a programme on puppets......not forgetting Doctor Who and Law and Order and The Palladium....oh yes and he has a feature coming where he travels abroad with his son.....not forgetting East Enders..............it's not that I dislike the bloke........but it would be nice to have a different face on the tele FOR A CHANGE......Kathryn Ryan is another....she is virtually on every quiz panel....and I've yet to find out what she actually does....I think she is a comedienne......I'll take her word for that. 2.Radio Merseyside (your favourite station) has not renewed Billy Butler's contract for the coming year.....this has caused outrage on Facebook......Billy is now 76 and has been on the station for 47 years and was told in no uncertain terms that he was out.....the public response has been overwhelming....despite the fact he was only on two afternoons each week.....apparently the powers that be are looking to attract a younger audience....obviously not realising that youngsters don't listen to the radio nowadays.....I think one of the problems is that the present hierarchy are from Manchester and don't get scouse humour....thus they scrubbed Billy's "Hold Your Plums" feature which was popular all over the world.....however....knowing Billy he will sort something out.....I think the BBC owes him a bit more than a swift goodbye....but that's the way it goes in the entertainment business. 3.I was interested in a TV interview with The Searchers......or the two original ones....John McNally and Frank Allen (the bass player that took over from Tony Jackson back in the day) are retiring.....but it was obvious McNally wanted to carry on (...as "The Searcher"?)......Frank said he had had enough of road repairs and diversion signs which added hours on to the travelling......or could it be he couldn't face one more rendition of Needles and Pinsa........I can see his point.....I packed in playing professionally a bout five years ago because I was sick of it after 50 odd years....some carry on for the ego trip....hence the shades and cowboy hats etc. which is fine but not for me....I keep my hand in by jamming once a week for our fundraising organisation (The Cheshire Cats) which I enjoy but have no desire to go back on the road......it's a young world out there....let 'em get on with it. 4.HMV are going under apparently.......when will the high street realise that you have to move with the times.....I've said it for years...the music biz has had it....the glory days and the champagne breakfasts are over.....it's all about the internet these days and PRICE.....the general public are not interested in loyalty they want things as cheap as they can get them.....hence they buy on line from Amazon etc.......CDs and DVDs are a thing of the past.....and with modern technology you can make a record in your bedroom and put it on YouTube where it goes world wide....so who needs Abbey Road or the radio play?....and it's difficult getting publicity on television.....unless they can fit you in around Bradley Walsh. 5.The song this week is a little tribute to Billy Butler.....I was asked to write this for him and Wally Scott back in the day.....it was designed as a theme tune for his popular programme "Hold Your Plums" which was a quiz game featuring a one arm bandit...hence the rather double entendre title......I don't think the beeb used it....obviously not P.C......can't imagine why.....when I hear it now I suppose some folk might be "easily offended"....as if I could care less....it's a shame George Form(continued)

ONLY 1,489 of the 10,816 Moroccans who arrived in Spain irregularly this year were afterwards expelled from the country. Despite the government’s efforts to rope in Morocco’s assistance regarding the migration issue, this is the lowest figure in the last four years. The Spanish government is this week taking to Congress a new strategy for Africa that focuses on investment, peace missions, a greater business presence, and what it terms “orderly mobility” between the continent and Spain.Following a five-year hiatus on the issue, Spain is finalizing a new comprehensive plan for Africa, said sources at the Foreign Ministry. According to these sources, the Socialist Party (PSOE) government of Prime Minister Pedro Sánchez wants to create a more productive relationship that looks beyond the issue of irregular immigration to address political stability, peace and security, economic growth, and sustainable development on the continent. The document does not use the word immigration, alluding instead to “orderly mobility.” There are notable differences between bilingual education in each of Spain’s regions, especially when it comes to the English skills required of teachers. In Asturias, where more students study in English than any other region (52.3% in elementary school and 33.7% in high school), teachers only need to have an intermediate level (B2). In the UK Ministers finally activated all no-deal Brexit plans today as Theresa May warned they could not delay any longer. With just 101 days to go until the UK crashes out and Parliament deadlocked, Cabinet signed off billions of pounds more spending on preparations. The scale of the effort was underlined today as it emerged there are 320 projects - including the booking of space on ferries to ensure critical medical supplies can still get into the country. There are also 3,500 troops on stand-by to intervene anywhere they are needed. The public will also be urged to prepare themselves and their families, with detailed information on contingency plans set to be published over the coming weeks - including through the Christmas holidays. Amid claims the public might be alarmed by the dramatic preparations, Mrs May's spokesman insisted: 'These are the actions of a sensible Government to ensure people are prepared.' In Monday's double bill of Coronation St., fans saw Kate reach breaking point in her quest to have a baby, breaking down in tears as she told Rana she wanted a child to fill the space in her life that had been left by her brother Aidan's suicide earlier this year.......... A new sign outside the Crown & Anchor, in Brixton, South London, reads: 'We will only be accepting card payments. Apologies, but it is the digital age.'The pub made the decision to go cashless in October this year, to deter burglars after several break- ins.

Meghan Markle's dad is very upset because she isn't talking to him....and doesn't answer his texts etc...so Piers Morgan is straight in with an interview with him.......I'm still trying to puzzle out what it has to do with anyone else other than Meg?....Joan Collins was on the same programme and said Meghan's dad has been in showbiz long enough to know better....and good old Joanie scoffs at feminism....that's why I love her. There was a comedian on morning TV who has been criticised for refusing to sign a contract which laid out what he could not say in his act to prevent anyone being offended.....the document was hilarious....it covered EVERYTHING from racism and sexism to ageism and physical heightism.........because they a killing comedy stone dead...so some people are offended ...SO WHAT?....go somewhere else ..... I don't like Christmas..I never have..(bah humbug)...mainly because it magnifies everything...especially certain past sad moments like bereavements and loneliness... etc....and I always think the ridiculous amount of money spent in the shops could be put to better use in a lot of cases....we still have homeless people living on the street while the royals and the overpaid politicians are swanning around with their obscene riches............and I notice Tony Blair has come from under his stone saying we should have another vote on Brexit.....might effect your fortune eh Tone? On a lighter note...Katherine Jenkins was on TV promoting her latest album.....and at the risk of upsetting the feminists...she is a stunner....easy on the eye or what?............as far as I was concerned Katherine Jenkins is the best view in Britain......it was letter of the week for which I got 15 quid.... This week's song is yet another Christmas classic and is taken from a musical I wrote for a local radio station which we discussed last week......it features one of the characters telling us what he got for Christmas....it is called "In Me Christmas Stockin'"

TRAIN union CC.OO. has announced two additional strikes for December 21 and January 7. There was an existing train strike planned for this Friday 14, which at present is still set to go ahead. TERRORIST group Daesh have issued a video threatening future terror attacks on Spain, allegedly citing a return to Barcelona following last year’s attack in La Rambla. The video message, picked up by cyber-analysts, reportedly claims the “cells are ready and the objectives are designed”. THE Guardia Civil has detained 23 robbers in Spain. The arrest took place in Ciudad Real, Toledo, Cuenca, Badajoz and Zaragoza in homes inhabited by elderly people. In a Guardia Civil report, police claim that 23 individuals have been arrested and six more are being investigated. A REAL estate report predicts the ‘housing market boom’ will slow down from 2021.Prepared by the Institut de Tecnologia de la Construccio de Catalunya (ITEC), the document suggests ‘housing promotion’ will have grown by 11 per cent by the end of this year..... SINCE 2015, the number of requests from Britons to apply for Spanish citizenship has tripled. The Spanish media claim this increase is due to the uncertainty of Brexit.Spain’s General Department for Registries and Notaries reported that 166 Britons requested Spanish citizenship so far this year. Although the number is not as high as Morocco (10,067) and Venezuela (2,001)........ A MOTHER claims she dumped her new born daughter in a rubbish bin after becoming ‘overwhelmed and distressed’ at having given birth alone on the floor of an apartment in San Sebastian. The Brexit mess knows no bounds as Theresa May deludes herself into thinking her Brexit deal will be carried by Parliament. However, there is a bigger picture and the signal from Mrs May that she is ready to step down once Brexit is delivered came after she vowed to fight with 'everything I've got' to beat the Eurosceptic coup bid. The contest is being held after hardliners secured the 48 letters from Conservative MPs needed to force a ballot that could bring her time as leader to a shambolic end. Colin Wing, 60, was caught on camera screaming insults at the Manchester City player in a Premier League match at Stamford Bridge on Saturday. Mr Wing, from Beckenham, south-east London, says that he has lost his job, and his season ticket at Chelsea .... Concern is growing for the safety of homeless people across Britain following a number of unprovoked attacks - including being robbed, urinated on, ambushed and hosed with water.

.Male voice choirs are now under fire by....guess who....the feminist brigade....at some university or other their male voice choir has been heavily criticised for not allowing women to sing in it....er....I think the clue is in the title?.....why have we got to put up with this constant nonsense?...and why do those involved get so much publicity?....we have female police chiefs....a female prime minister....female fire chiefs etc etc.... It's now time for the Christmas plays in the schools which sadly will be forgotten in no time....as those magical moments watching your youngster on stage cannot be captured on video......because .001% of parents worry about pictures of their little pride and joy being misused on the internet.....so everyone else has to .........I even got one of the scenes on You've Been Framed and shared the money with the kids and their parents who were happy as Larry....then along comes the P.C.Brigade who pandered to odd parent who wanted their kid's face pixillated out and various other requirements......which is typical these days. I watched the programme on Cliff Richard's 60 years in showbiz....I was expecting to see his music through the years from his beginnings with The Shadows to the present day....which aint what we got.........I must say the guy is a survivor....the problem is it's the BBC who are involved in the case so WE will end up paying their fines.......and as usual Cliff is bringing out an album for Christmas...surprise surprise......good luck to him. I also watched another programme about the farmer who shot and killed a burglar in 1999 and went to jail for manslaughter............I expected there to be a discussion regarding what RIGHTS a burglar actually has..........I find it very easy NOT burgling houses.....the legal system in this country possibly fails to see the big picture......what needs to be taken into account is the suffering and anxiety this sort of thing causes to innocent people. On a lighter note...the song this week is entitled "If Every Day Was Christmas Day" and it was originally written for a lady called Penny Page who had a ventriloquists dummy called Googi....which was a Scouse duck.........it was also the title song of a musical I wrote for a local radio station which will remain nameless..........despite being broadcast as being written by two of the radio .......myself getting the credit for the music only.....the play which was broadcast on Christmas day was nominated for a Sony award..........

French President Emmanuel Macron caved in and suspended hated fuel tax hikes in a victory for the Yellow Vest protesters. In a humiliating U-turn, the government said it was planning to freeze upcoming increases on regulated electricity and gas prices following emergency talks at the Elysee Palace. Vox has swept its way into the Andalusian regional parliament on a national platform that includes no specific plans for the region. The far-right party rejects Spain’s highly decentralized system granting devolved powers to the regions (known in Spanish as the Estado autonómico), even though this system is encoded in the Spanish Constitution. Vox also does not believe in the electoral system that has just earned it nearly 400,000 votes and 12 seats in the regional legislature. With a populist 100-point program that smacks of Donald Trump (including calls for an “insurmountable” wall along the borders of the Spanish exclave cities of Ceuta and Melilla), Vox’s Andalusian candidate, Francisco Serrano, aims to begin the “reconquest” of Spain...............No to immigration. The party plans to “control immigration flows depending on the needs of our national economy and of the new arrivals’ ability to integrate into Spanish society and accept our values. There will be country quotas with favorable treatment for nationalities who share our language and who have significant cultural and friendship ties with Spain.” AROUND 1,000 people took to the streets of Malaga City on Monday to protest against the election of members of a far right political party to Andalucia’s regional assembly. SPAIN will now export an expanded range of pork products and table grapes to China following an agreement made as part of the framework of President Xi Jinping’ s visit last month. PUPILS at the Mojacar Rey Alabez Institute in Almeria learnt about the potential dangers associated with social media at a talk given by Juvenile Court Judge Rafael Soriano Gruzman. Theresa May suffered three humiliating defeats on Brexit on Tuesday in the worst hour for a sitting Prime Minister in 40 years. The Commons voted to give MPs the power to demand a 'plan B' on Brexit if the PM's deal is voted down, hold the government in contempt for the first time in history, and forced ministers to publish the full legal advice on Brexit. The most senior judge at the European Court of Justice has concluded that Britain would not need permission from the 27 other states to halt the Article 50 process - and could retain the same membership terms. Nigel Farage warned Tommy Robinson’s appointment as an advisor on prison reform and ‘Muslim rape gangs’ risked turning Ukip into the new BNP. Announcing his resignation in a newspaper article, the former party leader wrote: 'And so, with a heavy heart, and after all my years of devotion to the party, I am leaving Ukip today. A bitter row between a step-father, a headteacher, and a police officer outside a high school over the man's 'frightening' cycling face mask has been captured on video. A father has been shot dead in front of stunned children while picking up children from school in Belfast. The incident happened near St Mary's Grammar School in West Belfast.

The Paris riots have been headlining the news here....it's over fuel prices.....and the oil companies deserve it...they have been ripping us off for years....they are greedy money grabbers who prey on the general public and I think this could be the tip of the iceberg....the public are getting sick of complaining with no-one taking any notice and this is the answer.....also the police can now ram idiots on mopeds who terrorise the streets and commit crimes on stolen bikes.....naturally the doo-gooders come out of the woodwork saying how wrong this is.....however a member of the force came on the radio saying these yobs don't have to steel bikes and commit crimes....it's their choice.....if they choose to do so they must face the consequences.....at last a bit of welcome sense. I've just watched an item on our wonderful news ...apparently engagement rings are now belittling women....and a girl who won an award as the best player in women's football was asked to twerk when she got the ward...this has caused OUTRAGE!!!! the feminists are on the march.....as the ladies continue to try and take over the world I think it is just a matter of time before they implode as their ideas could seriously affect those who dress provocatively and latch on to some very rich male and relieve him of his fortune....thus they will end up fighting against each other as us poor downtrodden males look on before we get back to the way things used to be...when we had humour and common sense.......we are constantly being told that"You can't say that"....because it's racist or homophobic or sexist etc etc....what I would love to know is WHO SAYS SO???....what ever happened to freedom of speech....these "holier than thous" have been missing the point of humour for years...the character of Alf Garnett for example was there to ridicule people like him who were racist and how many idiots missed the point of Monty Python's Life of Brian?....get a life folks you are becoming boring. Noel Edmunds went into the celebrity jungle thing and was voted out after 9 days......for which he received 600 grand.....personally I could never stand the bloke but no entertainer is worth that obscene amount.....whoever agreed to pay him that should be brought to task.....at least it was ITV which doesn't cost me.....but I am delighted to donate to Chris Evans' 2 million a year on the BBC through my TV licence....are they taking the proverbial or what?.....and I have yet to work out what skills are required to read the .......nice work if you can get it. Englebert Humperdinck was on morning TV being interviewed and I must say he looked pretty good for his age...I'm not particularly a fan but I always admire people who look after themselves...he is 83 and virtually looks like he always did......Cliff is another who doesn't change.....I often wonder why some of these pop stars build up a fan base then decide to grow a beard and crop their hair etc and completely change their appearance .............and I recently watched a documentary on Marc Bolan which was quite interesting....I never got him at the time...then again all that flower power and "love and peace man" totally left me cold.... The song this week failed to make the classical charts.....it was a jingle I did back in the day for my mate Norman Thomas who worked on Radio City in Liverpool.....he had a daily competition whereby the listeners had to guess what Norman had in his hand by asking questions....with hilarious results.....there was a short jingle and this one which is the 12 inch version (no comments please).....Norman sadly passed away some years ago so this is dedicated to him..... I give you "What have I got in me 'and"...

British Prime Minister Theresa May has denied she ceded to Spanish demands over Gibraltar in the negotiations over the United Kingdom’s withdrawal from the EU, a process commonly referred to as Brexit. Speaking to the House of Commons on Monday, May said: “We are proud that Gibraltar is British and our position on sovereignty has not and will not change.” Her comments came after Spanish Prime Minister Pedro Sánchez said the political agreement reached over Gibraltar – a disputed British Overseas Territory located in the south of the Iberian peninsula and ceded to Great Britain in 1713 under the Treaty of Utrecht – was a clear victory for Spain. May ended her speech with the following declaration: “Our message to the people of Gibraltar is clear, we will always stand by you, we are proud that Gibraltar is British and our position on sovereignty has not and will not change.” The Conservative press has backed the British prime minister and attacked Spain for “grandstanding.” RYANAIR has been found guilty in Spain of violating the right to strike of cabin crews, and of breaching work safety regulations. Unions have revealed that the Labo ur Ministry has threatened to fine the budget airline on this basis, and for obstructing inspections. A TEAM of snipers are being sought by environment experts to patrol parks in Spain to eradicate wild parakeets. The population of the birds has apparently soared to uncontrollable numbers since they were first introduced to the country as pets in the 1970s. Their vast numbers are now ‘overshadowing quieter native fauna’ and ‘threatening to destabilise the ecosystem’. Donald Trump added to Theresa May's woes with an extraordinary attack on the package she has negotiated with Brussels. He jibed that the deal was 'great for the EU' - and warned it would hit trade with the US. The intervention - which was pounced on by Tory Eurosceptics - immediately sparked speculation that Mr Trump might have been listening to Mr Farage, whom he once backed as a candidate for US ambassador. A Tory MP revealed today he was 'evolving' a 'Plan B' Brexit to make it easier to agree with Brussels if Theresa May's deal fails in Parliament. Nick Boles, a former minister under David Cameron, said instead of trying to negotiate a brand new trade deal in just two years Britain should join a group called the European Free Trade Association (EFTA) in 2021. Nevine Mann, 36, and her husband Richard, 37, claim they have enough 'essentials' to keep them going for four months after the UK leaves the European Union. Th e couple, of Illogan, Cornwall, have stockpiled chickpeas, kidney beans, tuna, pasta, rice, couscous, chopped tomatoes, sterilised milk, tinned corn, beans, paracetamol and ibuprofen. They have also bought mountains of aspirin, juice, hand soap, Calpol, dried milk, honey, tea, coffee, porridge oats, raisins, bread, flour, yeast and Marmite. A cyclist thug who pulled out a huge 'zombie knife' and began smashing a car window in a terrifying road rage attack was today spared jail, sparking fury. Shocking dashcam footage showed an 18year old man brandishing the enormous blade on a busy south London road before repeatedly slashing at the car and threatening its 19-year-old driver, who got out and ran away.

.There is a school in Brighton where 70 primary school pupils have been allowed to regard themselves as "gender fluid".....so they are no longer girls or boys....and...wait for it....a university in London has banned the word "woman" because it has "man" in it...a woman is now womXn....so there you go....one of the many problems I have with stupid feminists etc is kids are an easy target as they are impressionable at a young age and can easily be manipulated...try telling a rugby scrum they are "gender fluid"...especially if you are holding the ball.........I'm definitely gender fluid after 6 pints....most woman are happy being a woman and enjoy being who they are...then in come the anti bloke brigade who serve no purpose whatsoever....and by putting them on a pedestal simply reveals their feet of clay....again the media need to wake up and stop giving these idiots publicity. 2.I watched the behaviour of the football fans in Europe on the news...they attacked the players as they arrived on the coach.....proving we have yet to move out of the dark ages.....what ia it with these boneheaded morons?...it's a football match that's all....but obviously to the neanderthals it's WAR........when Alex Ferguson left manchester United a radio presenter had a phone in and a fan told him that Ferguson leaving United was like a death in the family....and the presenter agreed with him....instead of telling him to get a life.......it's that strange desire to BELONG that puzzles me....very sad indeed. 3.I watched Michael McIntyre last Saturday and one of the features was BRADLEY WALSH.....wow I haven't seen him on the telly for at least half an hour......I've got nothing against Bradders but you do get a bit tired of seeing him ALL the time...The Chase (every day)...Dr.Who....The Palladium....Law and Order...Eastenders....and a few other things...he even had his own quiz show which didn't work.....and to top it all he has a new ALBUM out.......are there no other personalities out there?...and I can see it coming...rise SIR Bradley....he must have a great manager...as indeed has Katherine Ryan...she's another one...she is on every quiz panel...and what does she do?...apparently she is a comedienne ... I did see about 2 minutes of her stand up routine once...which was all I could take. 4.And now we have a plethora of re-union tours.....Boyzone have reformed for a final tour (thank goodness)....The Spice Girls (or 4 of them) have reformed "for their fans"...or perhaps they've run out of money?....O.K.lads set up the autotune your in for a long night.....and not forgetting Uncle Rod Stewart who is out there promoting his new album....featuring some of his own songs....pass me the earplugs.....and Cliff also has a new album out...oh yes it's Christmas I forgot....so he's constantly on the TV and radio still going on about his mistreatment by the media....time to put that one to bed mate...don't get upset GET EVEN!!!!.....then we have Noel Edmonds with his album of music to relax to....he's not on it by the way...and Nick Knowles with a NUMBER ONE album which should be a number two....and no doubt we'll an album from Alexander Armstrong and other so called musicians who think they can sing....and we wonder why the music business is slowly sinking into the mud.....and they all have to compete with Bradley Walsh who can promote HIS album every ten minutes on his multi appearances on TV. 5.I have been writing songs for The Krankies for many years....mainly for their Christmas pantos...and they have recently been on to me for another one for this years panto in Glasgow......our friendship began way back when I was asked to write a song for Cannon and Ball which I did....after a month or so I had heard nothing so I turned up to see them at Stoke and bluffed my way to their dressing room....they hummed and had about the song so I left it at that.....I then (continued)

I had to laugh at a news item from Bolton....they were asking people in the street how they felt about Brexit....they virtually all said they had completely lost interest and couldn't care less anymore ....which just about sums it all up........but then when you see 700,000 (allegedly) people marching through the streets because the democratic vote didn't go their way I suppose that explains it all..... ...There has been quite a bit of publicity about youngsters being seriously affected by bullying on the internet....which doesn't surprise me as they are never off their mobiles.....those of us who are of a certain age find this somewhat hard to comprehend....why not switch the phone off?..... ...On the showbiz front....the BBC are still trying to get more viewers by reporting "goings on" with he dancers and celebs....probably making it all up....however I am a fan of the programme ...I often wonder what how funny it would have been had Benny Hill been on it........and now we have "I'm a celebrity get me out of here"......I use the word celebrity loosely........and Holly Willoughby is a pleasant change from Ant McPartlin... ...I recently watched a programme featuring an audience with Billy Connelly from about 40 years ago....I must say he was very funny back then....I do like observational comedy...and it took me back to my playing days and when we were booked to play at weddings...which were all EXACTLY the same....the setting up the gear with kids sliding up and down the dance floor....grandma who never goes out sitting at a table with her coat on.....the bloke in the middle of the dance floor trying to get everyone up which doesn't happen until the booze kicks in....when they all get up and dance (for the first time in 20 odd years).....the night being rounded off by Uncle Harry who is standing at a table singing Blue Spanish Eyes (consisting of one note all the way through) with his admirers loving every second.....and he always goes down better than the band who have just done 4 hours.....oh the joy of showbiz....and do I miss it?........NO. ...The song this week is about a place you might have heard of.....Benidorm....ring any bells?......it was written from memory as I haven't been to Spain for a long time....in fact I spend my spare time in beautiful places like the Lakes and Snowdonia.......Buenos Dias Benidorm.

POLITICIANS across Spain jumped on comments from a senior official this week in which he let slip that the date of the next general election may be brought forward. Jose Luis Abalos, the left-leaning Partido Socialista’s (PSOE) Organisational Secretary, said the party had not ruled out holding a ‘Super Sunday’ on May 26. .............. A national vote has to be held no later than Sunday July 26 2020. THE Spanish government and authorities in Gibraltar have made a series of agreements which cover arrangements during the transition period following Britain’s withdrawal from the European Union (EU). ALMOST 4,200 judges and prosecutors walked out of courts across Spain on Monday in a national strike over pay rates, working conditions and the running of Spain’s justice system. AN international network of child pornography involved in producing and distributing material in 27 countries has been identified, and 14 arrests made in Spain. A further four suspects are being investigated, and the identities of more than 400 ‘users’ who viewed the images on WhatsApp groups have been passed on to Europol and Interpol. THE number of undocumented migrants arriving in Spain has broken records two months before the end of the year, according to government statistics. The latest data from the Ministry of the Interior showed more than 47,860 migrants arrived in Spain from the start of this year up to October 31. That is around 8,500 more than the previous record set in 2006, according to statistics. TWO neighbourhoods in Valencia City have made the list of the top five chosen by European holidaymakers using a tourist apartment booking site. A TOTAL of 81 million people from overseas are expected to have holidayed in Spain by the end of this year, 0.8 per cent less than in 2017. Figures from the Ministry of Tourism predict tourism figures for this year will not exceed the 81.8 million seen by the end of last year. The UK PM Theresa May has faced a week of intense pressure from Brexiteers since the publication of her 585-page withdrawal agreement with Brussels last Wednesday. Britain is at the mercy of Russian hackers who are plotting cyber attacks that could bring the country to its knees, politicians have warned. There are ten attacks happening every day, with many aiming to paralyse areas such as the NHS, the national grid and even Parliament. It has been suggested that the female reproductive system and stress responses are more sensitive to the negative effects of extreme physical activity. Scientists say there is some evidence that arduous physical activity can suppress normal female reproductive hormone activity, impair bone strength and elevate stress hormone levels to a greater extent than in men. Bingo and Bollywood dancing are being prescribed to help ease doctors’ workloads. Instead of giving out pills, GPs are referring ‘frequent attenders’ to activities including gardening, boxing and free coffee mornings. There are 112 activities on offer from the 37 practices in Croydon, south London. The pilot scheme receives nearly £800,000 in NHS funding but also relies on community volunteers.