Summary: (http://www.mortylefkoe.com/wp-content/uploads/marty_lefkoe_headshots_053_2-01_edit_235-150x150.jpg) I’m beginning to think that the ability to dissolve our “occurrings” is almost as important to living a happy and successful life as the ability to eliminate beliefs. Late last year I wrote several posts about the important distinction between reality and how reality occurs for us. Few people are aware of this distinction and even fewer are able to continually make this distinction throughout the day and then dissolve all their “occurrings.” Let me briefly explain what I mean by the distinction between reality and how it “occurs” for us for those of you who haven’t read my earlier posts (see December 15, 22, 29, 2009) or seen my video explanation (http://occurringcourse.com/how-occurring-works (http://occurringcourse.com/how-occurring-works/)/). An example of “reality” is losing your job. One possible “occurring” for that reality is a sense of victimization, a sense of disaster. This occurring would result in feelings of despair and helplessness. A different occurring might be: Being fired is an opportunity to discover what I really want to do with my life and then do it. This occurring would result in feeling challenged and excited. Neither occurring is the same as the literal event. Earlier this year I offered a tele-seminar during which I taught 20 participants how to easily and continuously make the distinction between reality and how it occurs for us. They also learned how to quickly dissolve how reality was occurring for them, so that they were left with nothing but reality. How we experience our lives moment-to-moment is largely the result of how events and people occur for us. So the ability to dissolve that occurring gives us the power to create our experience of life. To make this clear, let me quote some of the participants in my current course who are mastering the art of dissolving their occurrings. Here’s one: I've also noticed that I no longer feel the need to defend my position when criticized or when faced with someone whose point of view is different from my own. I can listen to what is being said, without feeling as if one person is wrong and the other is right. The dissolving [of my occurrings] is instantaneous in most of these situations. I feel as if this makes it possible for me to genuinely learn from the other person's perspective, where in the past, I'd have shut out what he or she had to say, focusing only on defending my point of view. Here’s another: One very positive thing to report: When I [dissolve my occurring] … the effect is very profound. I feel very relaxed. My thinking is clearer. … Using the occurring process to identify what's going on helps a great deal. I feel more energetic and clear-headed. I feel more present and "in the moment." And finally: Petty arguments are decreasing because I am dissolving the occurring before it gets blown out of proportion. As a result I am feeling more confident and calmer throughout the day. I am also pointing out the reality in situations my oldest son is going through and he is beginning to grasp what I'm saying. How you benefit from dissolving your occurring There are several important advantages to being able to realize that how an event is occurring for you is the result of the meaning you are giving reality and is not reality itself, and then being able to dissolve the occurring. First, because all negative feelings come from the meaning we have assigned meaningless events, by dissolving our occurring (meaning) we can totally eliminate negative feelings quickly on the spot. As someone shared in my course: Some things are dissolving either instantly or very quickly; I’ve noticed that more and more, that pleasantly calm, neutral feeling is becoming my default setting. Second, because how reality occurs for us is how we think reality really is, it determines our behavior. If we think someone is being nasty to us, uncaring,
