Summary: <p><strong>You had no choice in the role a narcissistic parent created for you and assigned to you.</strong> <strong>You were stuck with it--while usually being quite unaware of it. It's just the way your family is, like it or not, right? </strong></p><br><p>NOW, in this episode, see your assigned role(s) so you can shed them and choose again! </p><br><p>In episode #201 on pseudomutuality, I talked about how #Hijackals like to paint a public picture of perfection on their families, which creating a private place of pain at home, within the family. Hijackals don't like the assigned roles I talk about in this episode to show in any way. It becomes a big family secret to them. In fact, they will deny that these roles exist: </p><br><p><em>"I love all of my wonderful children equally." </em></p><br><p>Now, we know that's not true. In fact, sometimes, it's a question of if they love any of them...or, anyone except themselves. (That's a topic for another time, though.)</p><br><p>In the episode, I mentioned these two definitions from Webster's dictionary. I'm including them here because some people think that scapegoats and black sheep are the same. There is an important distinction: </p><br><p>BLACK SHEEP: "a person who causes shame or embarrassment because of deviation from the accepted standards of their group."</p><br><p>SCAPEGOAT" "a person made to bear the blame for others or to suffer in their place." </p><br><p>Quite a difference when you're bearing the brunt of the role, particularly! </p><br><p><strong>HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE:</strong></p><ul> <li>How pseudomutuality creates a false front, masking the assigned roles a narcissistic parent gave you</li> <li>8 different roles you may have observed or experienced within your family</li> <li>Why narcissistic, Hijackal parents assign these roles</li> <li>How the "ruler of the household" assigns the labels</li> <li>Why everyone in the household goes along with them</li> <li>How your assigned roles may still be affecting your self-esteem and adult relationships </li> </ul><p><br></p><p>If you recognize some issues your family of origin created, <a href="http://beaclient.com/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">I'm here to help</a>.</p><br><p>I wish you well.</p><p>Big hugs!</p><p>Rhoberta</p><br><p><strong>Want clarity, insights, strategies, and support</strong> from me? We can talk: <a href="https://forrelationshiphelp.com/join" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Introductory session for new clients, $97</a></p><br><p><strong>CONNECT WITH ME</strong>: I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.</p><br><p><strong>FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...</strong></p><p><strong>WEBSITE: </strong><a href="https://www.forrelationshiphelp.com/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.com</a></p><p><strong>PODCAST: </strong><a href="http://www.saveyoursanitypodcast.com/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.com</a></p><p><strong>FACEBOOK: </strong><a href="https://www.facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctor" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctor</a></p><p><strong>TWITTER: </strong><a href="https://www.twitter.com/RhobertaShaler" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShaler</a></p><p><strong>LINKEDIN: </strong><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/in/RhobertaShaler" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShaler</a></p><p><strong>INSTAGRAM: </strong><a href="https://www.instagram.com/DrRhobertaShaler" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShaler</a></p><p><strong>PINTEREST: </strong><a href="https://www.pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler</a></p><p><strong>CLUBHOUSE: @</strong>drshaler</p><br><p><strong>YOUTUBE</strong>: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp</a></p><p>-------------------------------------------------------------</p><p><strong>I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!</strong></p><p>If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,</p><p><strong>join my Support Circle now.</strong></p><p>Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Saturday Support Calls with me.</p><p>WOW! Join now. <a href="https://www.forrelationshiphelp.com/circles" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Dr. Shaler's Support Community</a> Save $24 on your first three months.</p><p>----------------------------------------------------------------------</p><p>#rolesinanarcissisticfamily #narcissisticfamilyrules #beingascapegoat #goldenchild #blacksheepofthefamily #familyemotionalabuse </p><p>#borderlinepersonalitydisorder</p><p>#savemysanity #saveyoursanity #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #emotionaltrauma #toxicpeople #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stopemotionalgabuse #drshaler #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #boundaries #personalitydisorder #difficultpeople #antisocialbehavior #lackingempathy #journorequest #prrequest </p><p>Support this show <a target="_blank" rel="payment" href="http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist">http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist</a>.</p><br><hr><p style="color:grey;font-size:0.75em;"> See <a style="color:grey;" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer" href="https://acast.com/privacy">acast.com/privacy</a> for privacy and opt-out information.</p>
