The Joyful Mourning - A Podcast for Women Who Have Experienced Pregnancy or Infant Loss

Mother's Day is especially painful when your heart is longing for a baby. So on this week leading up to Mother's Day, a week that feels difficult, impossible even, I imagine you might be feeling like the Psalmist in Psalm 77 when he says: “in the night my hand is stretched out without wearying; my soul refuses to be comforted. When I remember God, I moan; when I meditate, my spirit faints.” Maybe you feel far away from God. Maybe you feel like He is punishing you. Maybe you feel like He has forgotten to be gracious. Maybe you feel like His faithfulness has come to an end and that He is no longer compassionate. Spend the next few days with me as we diligently make an effort to remember the God we love and serve. Just like the Psalmist in Psalm 77 when, after his seemingly harsh lament towards God, says very decisively, “Then I said, ‘I will appeal to this, to the years of the right hand of the Most High.’" (meaning I will call to mind all the ways I have seen Him work and what I know to be true from my past) and the psalmist goes on to say: “I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your wonders of old. I will ponder all your work, and meditate on your mighty deeds.” Let’s spend a few minutes together each morning this week intentionally remembering who God is and what that means for us personally. DAY 02 : GOD IS EVER PRESENT "Where shall I go from your Spirit? Or where shall I flee from your presence? If I ascend to heaven, you are there! If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there! If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me. If I say, “Surely the darkness shall cover me, and the light about me be night,” even the darkness is not dark to you; the night is bright as the day, for darkness is as light with you." Psalm 139:7-12 "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you." Isaiah 43:2 What does this truth about who God is, that He is Ever-Present, mean for me and mean for you? It means that He is always with me and He is always with you. It means we are never alone. It means that He doesn’t expect us to face the pain and the hurt and the brokenness on our own. It means that “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me.” Psalm 23 It means you never have to be afraid. Because the God who is All-Powerful, the God who is never overwhelmed, the God who has never faced a challenge too difficult for Him, the God who says “Nothing is too hard for me” is right there with you. He has never left your side. He is with you in the fire and in the flood and by His power He is guarding you and protecting you. You are safe because He is there. You are never, ever, ever alone friend. And he never meant for you to walk this road on your own. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/specialepisode02

Mother's Day is especially painful when your heart is longing for a baby. So on this week leading up to Mother's Day, a week that feels difficult, impossible even, I imagine you might be feeling like the Psalmist in Psalm 77 when he says: “in the night my hand is stretched out without wearying; my soul refuses to be comforted. When I remember God, I moan; when I meditate, my spirit faints.” Maybe you feel far away from God. Maybe you feel like He is punishing you. Maybe you feel like He has forgotten to be gracious. Maybe you feel like His faithfulness has come to an end and that He is no longer compassionate. Spend the next few days with me as we diligently make an effort to remember the God we love and serve. Just like the Psalmist in Psalm 77 when, after his seemingly harsh lament towards God, says very decisively, “Then I said, ‘I will appeal to this, to the years of the right hand of the Most High.’" (meaning I will call to mind all the ways I have seen Him work and what I know to be true from my past) and the psalmist goes on to say: “I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your wonders of old. I will ponder all your work, and meditate on your mighty deeds.” Let’s spend a few minutes together each morning this week intentionally remembering who God is and what that means for us personally. DAY 01 : GOD IS ALL-POWERFUL "Ah, Lord God! It is you who have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and by your outstretched arm! Nothing is too hard for you." Jeremiah 32:17 What does this truth, that He is all-powerful, mean for me? It means that He can help me with anything and through anything. Nothing is too hard for Him. Nothing is impossible for Him. Nothing that stands as insurmountable for Him. Nothing, not one thing in the history of the world, that is overwhelming to God. Your pain is not too big for Him to heal. Neither is your relentless anxiety. Your restlessness and sleeplessness. Your deep fear. Your bitter jealousy. Your joyless heart. Your utter brokenness. None of it is too big for Him to heal and restore and make new. None of it overwhelms Him. Nothing is too hard for Him. You are not too much for Him. His strength and His wisdom are sufficient. He can do it. Maybe it’s because we have likened God to humanity that we forget His power. We see our inability, we feel our overwhelm, we sense our powerlessness and we mistakenly assume the same for God. But He is God. And we are not. May our inability point to His ability today. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning SPECIAL EPISODE 01 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/specialepisode01

Whether you are walking through infertility, miscarriage, infant loss or you are here because you love someone who is walking through that kind of grief -- the truth and wisdom shared in this episode will undoubtedly leave you changed. Listen in as my friend Gina Zeidler gives the most honest, tender and truth-filled interview. Gina is a wife, a mama, and an amazing photographer -- she is also a woman who has walked through years of infertility and two miscarriages. Her honesty about how she has grappled to believe that God is good amidst such pain and loss offers freedom to the woman who is fighting to believe in His goodness today. Her honesty about what she wishes people on the outside knew about infertility and baby loss is tangibly helpful for those who are desperately trying to help a grieving friend. Gina’s vulnerability and candid wise words are filled with such hope that I promise this interview will leave you different -- whether its the way you give yourself the freedom to ask for help when you’re hurting or the freedom to talk to God honestly or the freedom to realize, maybe for the first time, that God will bring about healing, that you will have joy again. Gina’s story isn’t wrapped up with a tidy bow and yet she speaks with joy and hope. I am sure that because of this, no matter where you are in this grief journey, this episode is sure to bless you. DO YOU FEEL ALONE IN YOUR GRIEF? In Gina’s final words to the listeners she encourages women who are grieving to find community. Find women who understand what this pain feels like. Women who can say "I know" and really mean it. Gina talks about how invaluable this kind of support is in the healing process. If you are listening today and you feel alone in your grief, come join our free online community by clicking here. DO YOU LOVE SOMEONE WHO IS GRIEVING? As we near Mother’s Day I just wanted to let you know about two things: 1. I have created a set of really beautiful instant download, printable greeting cards specifically for the grieving mother on Mother’s Day. One of the kindest and most generous things you can do for a grieving mother is tell her you love her on Mother’s Day; that you’re praying for her and remembering her. These cards will help you do that very thing. You can find those at shop.themorning.com/collections/mothers-day-cards. 2. If you are looking for a gift for your grieving friend this Mother’s Day, I have the perfect thing for you. Check out The Morning Gift Shop, a carefully curated gift guide for grieving mothers. You can find that over at www.themorning.com/giftshop. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com GIFT SHOP FOR GRIEVING MOTHERS: www.themorning.com/giftshop THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 031 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/episode031

You’re listening to The Joyful Mourning Podcast Episode #30. Listen in as I talk with my new friend Jenna Dail. Jenna is the founder of The Color Blue & Hope, a non-profit organization that provides comfort and care resources for women on bed rest in the form of Boxes of Hope. She founded this organization after experiencing a significant period of bed rest while pregnant with her twin boys, fighting to keep them alive. Jenna knows the pain of bed rest and she knows the pain of loss when bed rest doesn’t end the way you hope it would, with two healthy baby boys on the other side. During our time together, Jenna talks honestly about the realities of bed rest and the difficult reality of losing her twin boys. She shares openly about pregnancy after loss and gives a few very practical words of wisdom about walking through that season. We talk about the expectations we put on ourselves and on others while grieving and she shares the most valuable piece of wisdom her counselor gave her regarding those expectations. Jenna also talks about what it looked like for her to finally realize that she didn’t have to hide her grief from her older children and instead what a meaningful role it is to help them learn what it looks like to navigate hard things. Lastly, she shares why she started a non-profit and what she loves about it most may surprise you. This episode is sure to bring practical wisdom and freedom to your grief journey. DO YOU FEEL ALONE IN YOUR GRIEF? In this episode, Jenna shares how important it is to find a friend to talk to and walk through this journey with. If you feel alone and need a friend who understands the realities of life after losing a baby, come join our free online community by going to www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com. DO YOU LOVE SOMEONE WHO IS GRIEVING? As we near Mother’s Day I just wanted to let you know about two things: 1. I have created a set of really beautiful instant download, printable greeting cards specifically for the grieving mother on Mother’s Day. One of the kindest and most generous things you can do for a grieving mother is tell her you love her on Mother’s Day; that you’re praying for her and remembering her. These cards will help you do that very thing. You can find those at shop.themorning.com/collections/mothers-day-cards. 2. If you are looking for a gift for your grieving friend this Mother’s Day, I have the perfect thing for you. Check out The Morning Gift Shop, a carefully curated gift guide for grieving mothers. You can find that over at www.themorning.com/giftshop. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com GIFT SHOP FOR GRIEVING MOTHERS: www.themorning.com/giftshop THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 030 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/episode030

You’re listening to The Joyful Mourning Podcast Episode #29. In this week’s episode I have the privilege of spending some time with Josefina Sanders. Josefina is a writer an artist who has used words and art to process through the grief of losing a baby. Josefina shares her story of miscarriage and the ways she found healing. Shes talks about the value of journaling through the grief and a few very simple and practical tips for getting started with journaling if that is something that is new to you. She also shares invaluable wisdom about walking through grief with a spouse or partner -- how important it is to ask questions like “how are you?” even when the other person is processing so differently than you are. And as we end our time together Josefina gives so much freedom to women who are grieving by saying “Be gentle with yourself. Give yourself time and space to grieve.” This episode is sure to bless you today as Josefina’s wisdom is beyond her years and her joy is contagious. I hope you love listening as much as I loved chatting with my new friend. DO YOU FEEL ALONE IN YOUR GRIEF? Josefina mentioned in our time together was how helpful it was to find women who understood the pain of miscarriage when she was walking through her grief. If you are alone in your grief and just need another woman who has been there and understands, come join The Joyful Mourning Community. It’s a free online community created to be a safe place for women just like you to be reminded they aren’t alone in this, to find another woman who understands, who can listen and pray and offer wisdom and just be there so you don’t have to feel alone anymore. Come join us by going to thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 029 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/episode029

You’re listening to The Joyful Mourning Podcast Episode 028. In this week’s episode I get to spend some time chatting with Libby Marler, a wife, a mother and an experienced counselor who recently set out to specifically help families who have received difficult news such as fatal diagnosis’. Libby shares her own story of her daughter Meredith, what it was like to receive the news that Meredith had a life-threatening congenital heart defect, what it was like to lose her after complications from an open heart surgery and what it has been like since then, learning to live without her. Libby shares an incredible amount of wisdom about walking through grief -- wisdom that will bring you freedom in your own grief today. We talk about bringing all of our emotions, all of our feelings, even the messy, ugly ones, to God and how He wants us to bring those things to Him. We talk about the importance of community and friendships and saying out loud how we are doing and how much healing takes place when that happens. And if you are here because you love someone who is grieving -- we have so much wisdom for you in this episode too and we even share the one question we think you should be asking to someone who is hurting. I’m so grateful you are here friend and I pray this episode blesses you today. -- DO YOU FEEL ALONE IN YOUR GRIEF? As I mentioned, and as you will hear, Libby and I spend time talking about the value of community, of friendships, of having a safe place to process how we are doing. If you are looking for that very thing, if you feel alone in your grief and just need another person to listen, come join The Joyful Mourning Community. It’s an online community of women just like you who can listen and pray and offer wisdom and just be there so you don’t have to feel alone anymore. Come join us by going to thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com. I’ll see you there. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 028 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/episode028

In this episode I get to spend some time with my friend Jess Connolly as she shares the story of her miscarriage. Listen in as Jess gives invaluable wisdom about loss and grief. She shares with us the most helpful advice she was given after her miscarriage, that came her mom; advice that I wish every woman could hear and allow to inform the way in which they grieve. We talk about the dichotomy of fear and joy that co-exist when a woman who has experienced miscarriage gets pregnant again. We talk about what it looks like to give your spouse the space to grieve and we even talk about the enneagram.* Jess also shares one of the most tender and encouraging visual images that will remind an aching heart that though there may be death in our physical bodies, God is still growing something good in the spiritual. We talk about the value of saying out loud the fears or insecurities or lies we are believing about our grief and the importance of finding a safe place to say those things. If you are need of a safe place to voice those things, come join us at The Joyful Mourning Community -- created to be that very thing, a safe place where you can feel known and understood in your grief. A place where other women who understand what you are going through can remind you that there is no shame in the way you are processing your grief. To join the The Joyful Mourning community go here: www.themorning.com/community. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 027 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/episode027

Episode 026. In this episode I talk with Ashlee Karasch, a wife and a mama, who has walked through multiple miscarriages. In this episode Ashlee shares her story of loss and how during that season of intense grief her faith was tested as she questioned everything she thought she believed. Ashlee shares honestly about how she found healing, what advice she would give to a grieving couple, and what it was like to try to get pregnant again. She also talks about how she found help amidst her loss and her answer might surprise you. Lastly, we talk about the importance of finding women who understand what this grief feels like and giving them permission to speak into you life. If you are looking for women who understand what you are walking through, if you feel alone in your grief, I want to invite you to join The Joyful Mourning Community -- a place where women who are walking through the grief of baby loss, can feel known and understood. Come join this hope-filled, honest community by going to themorning.com/community. This episode is full of honest and candid wisdom, helpful for any mother who is walking through the loss of a baby. No matter where you are on your grief journey, I pray this episode will bless you. --- THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 026 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/episode026

In Episode 025 I have the privilege of talking with Justine Fulton, a mama who has had to do the unthinkable – plan a funeral for her 5 month old baby boy who tragically died of SIDS. Memorial or funeral services are not something we think about until the moment it becomes absolutely necessary and in that moment all the decisions that need to be made can be absolutely overwhelming. In this episode Justine and I spend our time together talking about all the beautiful details she implemented for her son’s memorial service giving ideas for simple ways to make the hardest of moments a bit sweeter and a bit more intentional. If you or someone you know is in the midst of planning a funeral for a baby there are multiple free resources including a free 10 page planning guide for you at themorning.com/episode025 THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 025 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/episode025

In Episode 024 I’ll be sharing a little about my own experiences of pregnancy after loss as well as a few thoughts about how to deal with that fear that can so easily plague our hearts and minds. And at the end of today’s episode I’ll be doing a little Q&A session with real questions submitted by listeners like you about pregnancy after loss. I pray this episode is helpful and hopeful for you today. THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 024 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/episode024

This episode is truly one of the most honest and tender interviews I’ve done and I am so grateful for the wisdom and hope shared in this episode. My special guest is Sharon McKeeman, a mother to 7 children, 4 here on earth and 3 in heaven. During our time together, Sharon talks about what it looked like and looks like still to fight for a healthy marriage while grieving, and how to do that when you are grieving so differently than your spouse; we talk about ways to love a grieving friend and Sharon gives a few incredibly simple but absolutely invaluable tips for how to do that. We talk about how helpful and healing naming your baby can be even if you never got the chance to meet him or her and if you only have a few minutes you should skip to the end when she says this about grieving mothers, ‘We are strong. We are warriors. We have gone through so much pain and so much suffering. And yet there is so much beauty to be had from it.” I hope you know that to be true today, that you are strong even when you don’t feel that to be true and that you might see a bit of beauty from the ashes today. I pray this episode blesses you. THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 023 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/episode023

You’re listening to The Joyful Mourning Podcast, episode #022. Today Meg Walker and I are talking about Postpartum Depression, specifically in women who have experienced the loss of a baby -- what the symptoms are, how to reach out for help and most importantly multiple reminders that there is no shame if you are experiencing this. You haven’t done anything wrong. We share trusted resources that are available to you, resources that will bring help and healing, and those are listed for you in the show notes for this episode as well. Neither Meg or myself are trained professionals in the areas of postpartum depression, we are simply approaching this topic from a place of having been there, from knowing first hand what its like and providing a bit of limited research in the hopes that if the symptoms we will talk about today sound like you, that you would know you are not alone and there is no shame in reaching out for help. There are resources available to help you in the show notes for this episode and you can find those at www.themorning.com/episode022 . THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 022 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/episode022

In Episode 021 I get to talk to Meg Walker about the anxiety and fear and depression that can be so pervasive after experiencing the loss of a baby. Meg is a former guest on the show who has become a dear friend, you can hear more of her personal story of loss in her interview in Episode 010. In today’s episode Meg and I share honestly about what fear and anxiety looked like in our own lives after our losses. We do our best to give words of honest hope as well as practical advice for those in the midst of it. Neither Meg or myself are trained professionals in the areas of anxiety or depression, we are simply approaching this topic from a place of having been there, from knowing first hand just how debilitating and paralyzing the fear can be. Our hope is that if you are battling fear and anxiety today that you would know you are not alone. There are resources available to help you find peace amidst your debilitating fear and I have listed those in the show notes for this episode, you can find those at www.themorning.com/episode020. THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.thejoyfulmourningcommunity.com THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 020 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/episode020

Welcome to The Joyful Mourning Podcast, episode #20. In this episode I am going to take a look back at 2018 and share all the good that happened here last year. I am going to share with you what I am celebrating from 2018, all the great things that happened this past year, as well as a few of the challenges from last year. And lastly, the 3 specific hopes I have for us in 2019. Thank you for being here friend and for listening in. I am so grateful for you and I pray this episode blesses you today. THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.themorning.com/community THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning EPISODE 020 SHOW NOTES: www.themorning.com/2018-in-review

Day 25 of 25 days of God’s promises for women who have grieving, broken hearts this Christmas, for women who have experienced pregnancy or infant loss and need a reminder of God's goodness, a reminder of true Hope when hope feels impossible. Join me this Christmas season for a daily promise, a promise that we can trust, a promise that would bring our hearts great joy, a promise that will restore our hope in our Savior-Redeemer-King who was born to die, so that we might live. I pray this podcast series blesses you and reminds you that you aren’t alone in your grief and you are more loved than you could ever imagine. THE JOYFUL MOURNING COMMUNITY: www.themorning.com/community THE JOYFUL MORNING INSTAGRAM: www.instagram.com/thejoyfulmorning THE MORNING ONLINE: www.themorning.com