Girlfriends with Danielle Bean

Listener Jennifer emails a question this week: How do you handle changing friendships? How do you navigate the need for a friendship to end, if a relationship becomes a negative influence in your life and motherhood? We discuss the importance of evaluating your friendships and of seeking new friends if you are currently feeling alone. I encourage every woman to screen her influences, as the people we spend time with truly do affect how we feel about our life, marriage, and motherhood. I also share an email from listener Jennifer who is struggling with some conflicting feelings about her first pregnancy. We also hear and from Shelley, who responds to Catherine’s voicemail from last week, sharing about adult children who are not practicing their Catholic faith.

In this week’s show, I share a wonderful conversation I had recently with Mary Haseltine, a wife, mom, doula, childbirth educator, and author of Made for This: The Catholic Mom’s Guide to Birth. Mary shares beautifully about how she came to write this book, the ways in which women can connect through their experiences of pregnancy and childbirth, and what she wishes more women knew about the birth experience. This is an important conversation for us to have—namely, women seeking to support one another in faith and family life—and I am so grateful that Mary wrote this book. Find out more about Mary and her work at BetterThanEden.com.

Does it sound like a bad idea to "fake it till you make it?" This week I'm sharing some ways that I think "faking it" actually can be an effective strategy for getting through tough times and challenges in your life. Some of the areas I think the idea of "faking it till you make it" can be helpful are as follows: 1) Marriage We all suffer through tough times inside of marriage. These are the times that the vow is for! Getting through these times by going through the motions of the love and caring that is usually present in your relationship, even when the "feelings" aren't there, is the stuff that strong marriages are made of. 2) Work Whether you work as a mom at home or do some work outside the home, we all have days where our daily duties feel like drudgery. Just getting started and "faking it" can help us remain loyal to our responsibilities and get through those hard jobs and tough days. 3) Spiritual Life Much like the commitment to marriage, our commitment to God does not always feel good. Staying faithful to our prayer life and faithful to God, even when it is challenging, can help us get through to the other side of spiritual dryness. 4) Exercise Exercise is definitely one of those commitments that we know is good for us, and can help to make us feel good, but it does not always feel good in the moment. Sometimes we need to just push through those moments and keep in mind where we want to be. If pretending we already there helps us get there, that's not a bad thing.

This week we are discussing how we can all be better witnesses to our faith, and we offer some ideas for ways to improve: 1) Say something. Don't be afraid to speak the truth and to share your thoughts, even when they are in opposition to others. 2) Say nothing. Sometimes, someone who does not share our faith does not need to be bombarded with our opinions, but they just need our sympathy and attention. This can speak volumes about the kind of people we are and the value of our faith. 3) Do something. Never underestimate the power of a good example! Our actions speak so much louder than our words. 4) Invite others. Remember that the evil parts of our culture "invite" people over to their side all the time. We should do the same! dD not be afraid of "butting in" when you are simply being welcoming and extending an invitation. 5) Pray! Pray for the grace and strength to be a better witness to your faith. Pray for those who do not yet share your faith, and pray to know the particular ways in which God is calling you to better evangelize his people. I also share feedback this week from Becca, who talks about finding healing in Jesus, and Eleanor, who wrote to share how much she enjoyed last week's show where we talked about nurturing your mother-heart. Let's not forget to pray for Taylor, the new wife and mom who was expecting twins but sadly lost one of her babies. Pray for her healing and strength, and for the health of her unborn baby.

What is your "mother-heart" and why should you nurture that side of yourself? This week we are diving into a topic that is relevant to every woman, regardless of her state in life. Pope St. John Paul II tells us that every woman is called to be a mother. What does that mean exactly, and how does that apply to our life? I share four reasons why you should nurture your mother-heart, and invite you to share your own thoughts on this important topic. 1. Because you were made for it. Every woman's vocation is motherhood. You were made for it. 2. Because it will make you happy. Pursuing motherhood, in whatever way that plays itself out in your particular circumstances, will give meaning and purpose to your life and lead to your ultimate happiness. 3. Because it's important. John Paul II reminds us that the world needs our motherhood, and that is more true now than ever. The work of mothers is vitally important to every human being. 4. Because people who tell you otherwise are sexist. We need to reject the (culturally popular) idea that motherhood is demeaning or "beneath us" and that we must reject WHO WE ARE in order to be happy and successful.

Do you procrastinate? Join the club! But don't let yourself wallow in that bad habit. There are things we can all do to get over our tendency to put off work we don't enjoy. This week, I'm sharing some simple ideas for breaking the habit of procrastination.

Colleen Duggan is a wife, mom, friend, and author of the new book Good Enough Is Good Enough: Confessions of an Imperfect Catholic Mom. This week, I'm sharing an encouraging conversation she and I had recently about struggling with perfectionism, wanting to control our kids, and all the ways motherhood pushes us into uncomfortable places of real spiritual and personal growth. I have known Colleen online for years and am a real fan of her work. I just know you are going to enjoy her too! If you enjoy this podcast episode, you may also enjoy Ascension’s study, Momnipotent: Finding Peace, Balance, & Joy in Your Vocation as a Mother and the book, Momnipotent: The Not-So-Perfect Woman’s Guide to Catholic Motherhood.

This week I share some happy news and goings-on from my family, and then three ideas for ways to set Holy Week apart and serve this holy season in the liturgical year. These three easy ideas are: 1) Do something more. Go to church when you usually would not, say the Rosary as a family, go to adoration, or tackle a cleaning project you have been putting off. Do something "more" this week and offer it to God. 2) Do something less. Is there something you can cross off your calendar this week to make more room for God and prayer? Kids activities, your own work, or social events? Look for ways to do something less. Even fasting from something more can be a good place to start! 3) Go to confession. I especially was encouraged to give you this "assignment" after hearing Fr. Chris Alar (from the Divine Mercy Shrine n Stockbridge, MA) speak in Nashville this past weekend. If you get yourself to confession, you will be fully prepared to receive all the graces of Divine Mercy Sunday (April 8) as described by Our Lord to St. Faustina. Here is more information about that.

Fiction author Amy Schisler shares about her work, her family, and how she balances a life of writing original "CLEAN" romance novels with her busy life as a wife and mom raising girls. You can check out Amy's work and learn more about her at her website. We know you will enjoy her books! If you do, be sure to leave her some good reviews on Amazon!

Children's behavior during Mass is such a common topic in Catholic family circles! At the very least, those of us who struggle to manage our children's behavior at Mass can know that we are not alone. This week, I share an email from a listener named Lori who received a nasty comment from a fellow parishioner after a recent Mass (where she actually felt her children were pretty well behaved!). This email left Lori feeling discouraged and wanting to give up on the whole "Catholic family life" thing because she really ought to be able to expect support from her parish community. After commiserating and offering some words of encouragement and support, we then share some ideas for ways to improve your chances of having a positive Mass experience, even with very young children.

We've already talked about different ways we can add prayer and almsgiving to our Lenten observances this year, but this week I would like to focus on fasting as a spiritual practice. Learn ways to stay on track with your fasting and make it a meaningful part of your Lent. Don't be afraid to be creative and flexible when planning to fast; make sure prayer is a part of your plan; offer up the fasting for someone else—these are just three of the ideas shared in this episode of the Girlfriends podcast.

Have you ever wasted time, avoiding tasks you don’t like to do, only to rush to complete them later? Everyone has certain things they don’t like to do and it is natural to put them off and fill the time with easier tasks. Even when we recognize what our priorities should be, we can sometimes make choices that are in direct conflict with our priorities, and this causes us to waste valuable time. Today, Danielle shares seven practical ways you can get motivated and make the most use of your time each day.

Are you working on generosity this Lent? This week I'm sharing some ideas for ways in which we can all work on being better servants to the people God has placed in our lives—in marriage, parenting, work, and in our communities. This is something I have been especially praying about and working on this Lent, so I am hoping you will have some ideas to share as well. Give me your feedback!

This week we talk about the beginning of Lent and I share some of my plans for the coming forty days. I also share a recent conversation I had with Dr. Ann Garrido, a professor and author. Ann Garrido, Doctor of Ministry, is associate professor of homiletics at Aquinas Institute of Theology in St. Louis, MO and a consultant with Triad Consulting Group, a conflict mediation and communications team based in Cambridge, MA. She is the author of six books and numerous articles in the field of Church leadership and ministry.

Do you need healing in your life? Of course you do! We all suffer physically, spiritually, and emotionally. In this week's show, we discuss two Gospel passages that are helpful to reflect on when in need of healing. We talk about ways we can "get out of our own way" when it comes to finding peace and healing from God. Gospel passages cited: Mark 2:16-17 Luke 13:10-17 In this show, I also share some feedback from Taylor, who is a young wife, newly-pregnant with twins and has some concerns about her babies' health. Please let us remember to pray for Taylor, that God might give her peace and strength throughout this pregnancy. We also share a question about fair trade and the ethics of shopping from listener Maggie. Let me know what you think! Some Places Danielle Will Be: I hope to meet you! February 10 Danielle will be speaking at the Phoenix Catholic Women’s Conference February 17 Danielle will be speaking at Together in Holiness marriage conference in Tulsa, OK February 24 Danielle will be speaking that the Catholic Women of Faith Conference in Nashville, TN March 10 Danielle will be speaking at the Rochester Catholic Women’s Conference in Rochester, NY