Riders Radio Theater

Slocum sent the doofus Charlie on a bizarre shopping expedition to procure a curious array of scientific electronic and household items. Later that night, in a makeshift laboratory underneath the Dry Gulch Saloon, our resident villains are inventing a robotic nightmare the town will never forget…

The villain Slocum was released from prison on appeal. Upon exiting the jail, he bumped into High Sheriff Drywall, stealing his badge and wallet. In no time, Slocum was operating once again out of the Dry Gulf Saloon. As the sun goes down in Tumbleweed Valley, the citizens gather at the Buck Benny Theater for the big fantastic magic show featuring Heff Heff and Mr. Bagwell… featuring The Ohio Valley Rounders!

It’s Saturday morning in Tumbleweed Valley, and all is peaceful and well… except in the kitchen of Harmony Ranch. The Riders are gathering for breakfast while Sidemeat looks for his big bowl to cook a big surprise. Meanwhile, High Sheriff Drywall is bringing breakfast to his current prisoners…

The Riders gathered a recall petition to stop the big “Elvis Alive Again: Hello from Vostrovia” concert, and Slocum was fired as boss of Vostrovia. But by then he couldn’t have cared less, because he was off with 50 million bucks, a 20-megaton hydrogen bomb, and a getaway jet with the engines running… featuring Waddie Mitchell!

The Vostrovian skies are turning dark and dreary, the barometric pressure is falling, and the sound of distant thunder heralds the news that soon the monsoons of autumn will pour torrents of rain across the land. But inside the Mud Dome everything will remain dry! It’s the day before the Vorstball playoffs, and Riders In The Sky have gathered to watch the teams practice…

Using Sidemeat’s secret biscuit bonding catalyst, Woody Paul devised a super mud for which to build the huge domed stadium. Meanwhile, former High Sheriff Drywall has reached Vostrovia in the dead of night, only to be run over by Slocum and Charlie’s armored limo… twice. Now suffering from amnesia, former Sheriff Drywall’s memories are slowly returning… featuring Don Edwards!

The Vostrovian beet harvest has been delayed due to the vorstball playoffs, the country’s national pastime. Unfortunately, Vostrovia is still in great need of a domed stadium for the playoff games. To remedy the situation, Ranger Doug has given his personal guarantee that if they harvest their beet fields before the games, he will see to it that a 50,000+ seat stadium will be built…

After being recognized by a storekeeper in Lake Edna, the Riders were informed of a national town hall meeting scheduled for the next day. Meanwhile, former High Sheriff Drywall was canned from the Big Red China Elvis My Way tour and left stranded on a dark, lonely dirt road in the middle of Central Asia… featuring Paulette Carson!

Riders In The Sky, now running low on supplies and wanted dead or alive by the Vostrovian government, have disguised themselves as Kentucky Colonels and ridden into the isolated village of Lake Edna to buy supplies. Will their cover be blown? Will Slocum capture the Riders at last? Is this the end of Riders In The Sky?! Featuring Great Plains!

A US plane carrying 30 tons of fine Wisconsin cheese has been forced to jettison its cargo directly over the hidden campsite of Riders In The Sky. As the huge, cheese-shaped shadow looms larger and larger, the Riders finally look up to what might be their dairy demise…

After landing in Vostrovia and narrowly escaping a shootout led by the doofus Charlie and the Vostrovian marksmen, the Riders fled to the hidden site in the foothills. In an unexpected turn, Sidemeat resorted to a biscuit-throwing rampage that led to an even less expected hole in the earth that swallowed him whole. Is this the end of Sidemeat and ill-prepared meals?! Featuring Montana Blue and the Big Sky Cowboys!

Instead of sending the billion dollars requested by Slocum on behalf of Vostrovia, the State Department has flown Riders In The Sky to the newly formed country. After receiving a crash course on Vostrovia culture and language, the Riders are on a plane en route to provide American foreign aid. Inside the Vostrovian Presidential Palace, Slocum is about to take a meeting with his Chief of Secret Police…

Slocum has taken over Vorstrovia after promising them foreign aid from the United States. Once in power, he established himself as a dictator known as “The Boss,” and made Charlie Head of Police. To keep with his campaign promises, Slocum has sent a request to the US for one billion dollars, which was opened for the first time by Lord Thackston IV… featuring Peter Rowan!

As the space capsule holding Slocum, Charlie and their Russian cosmonaut rescuer was about to float unnoticed to a landing site in Vostrovia, the parachute fell into the middle of the town hall. There, a group was gathered to elect a new leader to guide the country down the long road to capitalism. Recognizing opportunity when it knocks, Slocum wasted no time in making an appealing speech…

Slocum and Charlie, still stranded in space, are out of water, and all food is gone except for two jars of Tang. Fortunately, they are rescued by a Russian cosmonaut; unfortunately, he is also out of food and water. After finishing the jars of Tang, a ravenous Slocum recalls the Donner party’s historic solution and reaches for a lead pipe… featuring Marty Brown!