Summary: If you've ever felt stuck, or that you keep arguing about the same things over and over again...then you need to discover why this happens and what you can do about it on this show! Listen above or read the transcript below, either way, you'll find out about your buttons and what you need to do to stop the dance. And by the way, if you haven’t left a review yet in iTunes, don’t be shy, it’s easy to do and it really lets me know you’re listening (as a thank you, after your review is submitted, I'll send you a special free gift). FEATURED RESOURCE TRANSCRIPT [0:00:00] Corey Allan: [Music] Do you guys have times when you get a chance to go and spend the time with extended family? You know, we're just coming off for four days with family and it was the death in the family. So, there are all kinds of family there and when were driving home, it's a tremendous time to process how crazy family is and how, you know, annoying sometimes family is or just the way we live life and be -- Michael Smalley: I know a lot about that. Corey Allan: [Laughter] And the way we choose to do things like the way we parent or the way we communicate in marriage or the way we just live our life, I find myself really fighting the urge to be judgmental and condemning [Laughter] a lot of things when I realize that's not my place to do that, that's family. I should love them. [Laughter] Michael Smalley: We have to love them? Teresa Thomas: Unconditionally, yes. Corey Allan: I don't know if we have to love them and -- but -- but it seems like there should be some, you know, semblance of love when we get together [Laughter] as a family and it's not just at feeling real McCoy [0:01:17] [Phonetic]. Michael Smalley: Well, I think it actually begs the thought because when you say, "Well, I guess we have to love them," that's sort of what love is, isn't it? Corey Allan: [Laughter] It -- Michael Smalley: It's family and choosing -- choosing not to kill them. Corey Allan: Yeah and -- Michael Smalley: That could be one definition of love -- Corey Allan: Yeah and -- Michael Smalley: ... because I'm making a choice not to kill you. Corey Allan: Well, the reason I don't choose to kill family members is because I think other family members are high up on the suspect list right off the bat. So [Laughter] -- Teresa Thomas: That's right. [Laughter] Corey Allan: ... I'm not getting away with it. Michael Smalley: It's not going to happen. Teresa Thomas: That's right. Corey Allan: No, I don't think so. It's just -- Michael Smalley: We're nowhere near smart enough or sophisticated -- Corey Allan: No, no. Michael Smalley: ... enough to get away from that. Corey Allan: Just -- and just so everybody, our listeners, that maybe joining this conversation know. This is Simple Marriage Radio, the simple solution -- Michael Smalley: We help people learn how to get along. Corey Allan: Well, hopefully, but it's also the simple solution that helping make -- making married life great. I'm Corey and Michael and Teresa are on the mic as well. And we're going to continue to roll right along and see what unfolds. [Laughter] Michael Smalley: We'll see just how more dysfunctional we can get. Corey Allan: Absolutely. Michael Smalley: Wow, the -- you know, last show we talked about personal responsibility and sort of one of the quickest ways, honestly, to turn around any relationship is by looking in the mirror, right? Corey Allan: Yes. Michael Smalley: Or you just -- the more that you take ownership of your own junk and realize that, "Man, I get enough of my own my stuff that I have to take care of and resolve and get over and get huff, you’re about to really worry or point the finger at your junk, you know, things tend to start getting better. The better I love someone, the more I set them up to love me well back. Teresa Thomas: Correct.
