PPP103: Manipulation VS Inspiration




Piano Parent Podcast show

Summary: <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> Introductory remarks<br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> Definitions <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> Manipulation –        handle or control (a tool, mechanism, etc.), typically in a skillful manner.      control or influence (a person or situation) cleverly, unfairly, or unscrupulously.Causing the child to believe that he or she will only be loved by complying with the parent’s wishesCausing the child to feel excessive guilt for failing to live up to the parent’s expectations/demandsWhat does this look like with piano lessons or practice? Shouting at your child to practice or punishing them for not practicingCoaxing them to practice with false praise or excessive “If you loved me you would play that song for me.” “If you practice you can buy…. Or eat…”Comparing your child to others in a way that makes them feel less about themselves.Inspiration –        fill (someone) with the urge or ability to do or feel something, especially to do something creative.       to breathe in. (encourage, motivate, brainstorm)Helping a child find ownership in completing a taskTeaching a child to learn to be self motivated, even the task does not seem enjoyable.What does this look like with piano lessons or practice?Reminding them when it is time to practice. Keeping calm if they don’t respond right away.Genuine praise for the music they are making. Thank your child – for practicing, for obeying you….the first time.<br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> As consumers, we know when we're being played <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> We know when we’re being manipulated. We’ve seen infomercials with wild claims about their product. We may have even been compelled to “Act Now!” because “Time is running out!” My defenses kick into gear when I feel like I’m being played. Even if we buy their product, are we loyal customers to that company? <br> <br> <br> <br> <br> Excerpt from the Start with Why blog <a href="http://blog.startwithwhy.com/refocus/2007/02/manipulation_vs.html" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Read the full article here</a>Manipulation vs. Inspiration“There are only two ways to get people to act: manipulate them or inspire them.  Both are effective strategies, but only one is capable of generating a sale AND a  lifetime of loyalty.Manipulations (dropping your price, having a promotion, using a scare tactic) can be very effective, but the gains are usually short term.  Over time, manipulations tend to get expensive – marketers must keep coming up with bigger and better manipulations sometimes at the expense of profits and always at the sacrifice of developing loyal relationships with customers.”I’m going to reread that last paragraph from a piano parenting perspective:Manipulations (unnecessary bribes or treats, punishment or other scare tactics) can be very effective for getting your piano kid to practice, but the gains are usually short term. Over time, manipulations tend to get expensive – parents must keep coming up with bigger and better prizes,