Summary: <a href="http://bit.ly/WFHep63"></a>At school our sons keep it together. At home, flushing the toilet is well beyond their capability. This leads to a litany of “hurry up, put that down, stop doing that, start doing this” from their mothers. But are we too hard on our boys? We had an “aha moment” after reading <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2018/04/10/well/family/whos-a-good-boy.html">this question</a> posed by parenting expert Wendy Mogel: <br> <br> What percentage of your communication with your son consists of nagging, reminding, chastising or yelling?<br> <br> We’re going to respectfully decline to answer that question, as is our Fifth Amendment right. But we love Mogel’s solution: <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2018/04/10/well/family/whos-a-good-boy.html">Talk to them like dogs.</a> Really. Read the whole article; it’s a real perspective-changer. Mogel suggests that as our children’s lives become more intense and more structured, with ever-increasing homework when they finally get home, our boys are losing their chances to run and bark and chew on shoes (metaphorically). And that that’s leading to all sorts of issues.<br> In this episode we discuss: <br> <br> how studies have proven that we treat infant daughters and sons differently- even before they can speak<br> how to fight against the parenting norms of what David Lancy calls “WEIRD societies” (Western, Educated, Industrialized, Rich, Democratic)<br> why the key to our sons’ happiness can often be found in the garage<br> how to be interested (really interested) in what our sons are interested in. Even if it’s Fortnite.<br> <br> Here’s links to studies and research and other things we discuss:<br> David Lancy in Human Relations Area Files: <a href="http://hraf.yale.edu/a-cross-cultural-perspective-on-childhood/">A Cross-Cultural Perspective on Childhood</a><br> Andrew Reiner for the NYT: <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2017/06/15/well/family/talking-to-boys-the-way-we-talk-to-girls.html">Talking To Boys the Way We Talk To Girls</a><br> Dr. Edward Tronick, et al, for Harvard Medical School and Developmental Psychology: <a href="http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/0012-1649.35.1.175">Gender differences in emotional expressivity and self-regulation during early infancy</a> <br> St. Augustine Prep School website: <a href="https://hermits.com/prep-talk-blog/anxiety-in-young-boys-is-not-normal/">Anxiety in Young Boys is Not Normal </a><br> 2017 Emory study: <a href="https://www.researchgate.net/publication/317158284_Child_gender_influences_paternal_behavior_language_and_brain_function">Child gender influences paternal behavior and language </a><br> <a href="http://%20welcome.havenlife.com/fresh"></a>This episode is brought to you by Haven Life Insurance Agency, a simple, self-directed way to buy term life insurance online. <br> Get a free quote by visiting <a href="http://welcome.havenlife.com/fresh">welcome.havenlife.com/fresh</a>. Haven Life: make life less hard.<br> This episode is also brought to you by: <br> <a href="http://go.gotrinova.com/fresh">TriNova</a>, a line of premium and powerful cleaning products designed for the toughest household jobs. We particularly love their shower door cleaner (soap scum be gone!) and their shoe deodorizer spray, which has finally gotten rid of that weird smell in Amy’s entryway. Get 20% off TriNova’s whole line of products by going to our <a href="http://go.gotrinova.com/fresh">special page</a> and using the code freshhell.<br> <a href="http://prepdish.com/wfh">Prep Dish</a> is a healthy, subscription-based meal-planning service that tells you what to shop for and what to cook in order to make delicious meals for the whole week. 1 to 3 hours of weekend prep, and you’re set! Get a free two week trial of prep dish by going to <a href="http://prepdish.com/wfh">prepdish.com/wfh</a>.<br> <br> <a title="Are We Too Hard On Our Boys?"></a>
