Summary: <br> <br> We average about one conversation a week, with one or other of our children, during which we are suddenly at a total loss as to what to say. Perhaps you too have had a few Tough Questions like these:<br> Is Santa real?<br> What is racism?<br> If I go to heaven, will my toys come too?<br> When answering Tough Questions like these, Amy feels that it’s important not to have innocence-ending conversations too early. She calls it “age-appropriate obfuscation.” Keep it simple, keep it reassuring.<br> But Margaret likes to call this approach “Say ‘Delay,’ Run Away,” and she has somewhat of a point. The Tough Questions need to be answered, and if a parent doesn’t step up, a kid might just seek out some peer education, bound to be rife with misinformation.<br> In this episode, we discuss<br> <br> * why it’s hard to explain concepts like racism to children young enough to be unaware of it<br> * how to let the child lead any delicate discussion with her questions (rather than your answers)<br> * the power of the pause before responding<br> * why you should always leave a little bit left over to divulge for next time<br> * why we all just have to figure out the <a href="https://thelazyscholar.com/2010/04/01/easter-bunny-blues/">Easter Bunny back story </a>already<br> <br> Here’s some of the best advice we have collected:<br> <br> * from Meg’s sister in law: Only answer the question you are asked. <br> * from educator <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/danielle-s-mclaughlin/civics-for-kids_b_4731473.html">Danielle McLaughlin</a>: “In order to actually engage our children, we need to find out what it is that they already know and what are they seeking to understand.”<br> * from <a href="http://www.pbs.org/parents/talkingwithkids/agebyage_6.html">Michael Thompson, PhD</a>: “Pausing for a moment…lets your child know you are taking him seriously.”<br> * from <a href="http://www.pbs.org/parents/talkingwithkids/strategies_10.html">PBS Parents</a>: save a little bit of information for the next conversation on the same topic. Cause it’s coming.<br> <br> And if you’re still completely tongue-tied…<br> Here are two books on the facts of life that are both thorough and reassuring:<br> <a href="http://amzn.to/2lelFHv">The Care and Keeping of You Collection</a> (American Girl)<br> <a href="http://amzn.to/2kHxv9v">It’s So Amazing! A Book About Eggs, Sperm, Birth, Babies, and Families</a><br> For talking to our kids about race,<a href="http://www.thewellqueenanne.org/kidsandraceresources/"> The Well Queen Anne</a>, a Methodist church, offers a great resource list <a href="http://www.thewellqueenanne.org/kidsandraceresources/">here</a>.<br> And for a how-not-to guide, here’s the tale of Amy’s <a href="http://Amy%E2%80%99s%20very%20mistaken%20tooth%20fairy%20explanation.%20Learn%20from%20her%20mistakes.%20%22Tooth%20Fairy,%20I%20Believe;%20Help%20Thou%20My%20Unbelief%22%20http://www.whendidigetlikethis.com/2012/03/isthetoothfairyrealmom.html">Tooth Fairy explanation</a> gone horribly awry. Learn from her mistakes.<br> How do you handle the tough questions in your house? Any advice of your own? Tell us in the comments!<br> <br> <a title="Episode Ten: What To Say When You Don’t Have a Clue" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="http://www.facebook.com/sharer.php?u=http://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/2017/02/episode-ten-dont-have-a-clue/"></a><br> <a title="Episode Ten: What To Say When You Don’t Have a Clue" rel="nofollow" target="_blank" href="https://plus.google.com/share?url=http://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/2017/02/episode-ten-dont-have-a-clue/"></a><br>
