Thrive After Abuse show

Thrive After Abuse

Summary: This podcast is a collection of the highlights from Dana Morningstar's YouTube channel, "Thrive After Abuse," where she discusses every facet of narcissistic abuse (and abuse in general), from what it is and the challenges people are facing, to how to undo the damaging effects of abuse and how to move forward into rebuilding a life you love. To ask a question for a later podcast (or YouTube) episode, send an email to deardana@thriveafterabuse.com.

Podcasts:

 Episode 7: What are Normal Deal Breakers in a Relationship? | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 13:45

It’s important that we all know ourselves well enough to know what are deal breakers for us–and what we consider workable behavior is, because treating deal breaker behavior like it’s workable behavior is how (and one of the main reasons as to why) people stay in abusive relationships.  There is a difference between commitment and codependency. It’s okay (and healthy) to not be dragged through hell by another person’s behavior, and to get yourself to both a physical and emotional place where you can stay safe and sane. What are your deal breakers?  …And what are your deal makers?   Do you have a question that you’d like my two cents on?  You can email me at: deardana@thriveafterabuse.com To find out more or to get support: http://www.ThriveAfterAbuse.com  

 Episode 6: Reverse Projection and Malignant Optimism | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 3:35

Projection is where a person (subconsciously) takes their “uncomfortable” thoughts, feelings, and actions and “projects” them (like a movie projector) onto someone else in an effort to ease themselves of the cognitive dissonance that their thoughts, feelings, and actions cause them.  When people are projecting their behavior they are often largly unaware that they are doing it. Targets of narcissistic abuse tend to do something that I refer to as “reverse projection” (not an “official” term).  Reverse projection is where a person “projects” all of their good thoughts, actions, and/or morals onto someone else who doesn’t actually have these traits (as seen by their pattern of problematic behavior such as chrnoic lying, cheating, siphoning funds/stealing, etc.) Both forms of projection are problematic, but if we are holding onto hope that a narcissistic person can change–when all their actions point to them not sincerely being interested in changing, then we will continue to be dragged through hell until we can’t handle it anymore. …Have a question you’d like answered in a future podcast episode or YouTube video? If so, you can send me an email me at: deardana@thriveafterabuse.com  (make sure to use a name that you feel comfortable with me putting on the [...]

 Episode 5: Getting Past The Guilt and Embarrassment Of Having Fallen For a Narcissist | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 12:10

Once we get out of a relationship with a narcissist and look back it is very common to blame ourselves for having fallen for their manipulations and lies. This is because we have enough emotional distance to see the situation (and all the red flags) clearly. And once people start seeing things clearly, they wonder how they didn’t see things clearly to begin with–and when this happens, it often leaves a person with tremendous amounts of guilt, shame, and embarrassment. It’s normal to feel these feelings, but please remember had you known this person was manipulative and abusive you would have never gotten involved with them. …Have a question you’d like answered in a future podcast episode or YouTube video? If so, you can send me an email me at: deardana@thriveafterabuse.com  (make sure to use a name that you feel comfortable with me putting on the air), and I’ll see what I can do!   Looking for daily motivation, inspiration, or more information about narcissism in general?  You can find me (Dana Morningstar) at: Facebook/ThriveAfterAbuse YouTube/ThriveAfterAbuse Instagram/ThriveAfterAbuse ThriveAfterAbuse.com    

 Episode 4: I Wish She Were More Abusive So I Knew For Sure That She Was a Narcissist | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 8:30

Some types of abusive behavior is more overtly problematic than others. Many people in abusive relationships tend to stay in them thinking that they aren’t abusive if they can still “handle” being in them.  In addition, a person doesn’t have to have Narcissistic Personality Disorder in order for their behavior to be a deal breaker.  Some great people are still not right enough for you and that can be reason enough reason to breakup with someone.   …Have a question you’d like answered in a future podcast episode or YouTube video? If so, you can send me an email me at: deardana@thriveafterabuse.com  (make sure to use a name that you feel comfortable with me putting on the air), and I’ll see what I can do!   Looking for daily motivation, inspiration, or more information about narcissism in general?  You can find me (Dana Morningstar) at: Facebook/ThriveAfterAbuse YouTube/ThriveAfterAbuse Instagram/ThriveAfterAbuse ThriveAfterAbuse.com  

 Episode 3: Help! Is He the Narcissist, or Do I Have Issues? | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 6:36

Does your relationship leave you feeling confused? Do they threaten to be dating others but then say they were joking and you are crazy for believing their “joke?” Does the person you are dating seem possessive but say they are protecting you? Do you find yourself feeling anxious, insecure, or googling their behavior in an attempt to get clarity about what’s going on? None of this is normal behavior, and ALL of these signs are some major red flags that you are in a relationship with a person who is controlling and emotionally abusive.   …Have a question you’d like answered in a future podcast episode or YouTube video? If so, send me an email me at: deardana@thriveafterabuse.com  (make sure to use a name that you feel comfortable with me putting on the air).   Looking for daily motivation, inspiration, or more information about narcissism in general?  You can find me (Dana Morningstar) at: Facebook/ThriveAfterAbuse YouTube/ThriveAfterAbuse Instagram/ThriveAfterAbuse ThriveAfterAbuse.com  

 Episode 2: Three Tips on How to Go (and Stay) No Contact | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 8:54

Going “no contact” can be difficult. It helps to prepare yourself as much as possible. 1. Familiarize yourself with the seven different types of abuse and several examples of each, as well as the different terminology surrounding abuse such as “gaslighting,” “projection,” “future faking,” “cognitive dissonance,” “hoovering,” “narcissism,” “Stockholm Syndrome,” “trauma bonds,” and “love bombing” to name a few. 2. Create your “For When You Miss Him/Her” List to help cut through the cognitive dissonance and to see them clearly. 3.Support Groups to get 24/7 support, clarity, and validation. …Have a question you’d like answered in a future podcast episode or YouTube video? If so, send me an email me at: deardana@thriveafterabuse.com  (make sure to use a name that you feel comfortable with me putting on the air).     Looking for daily motivation, inspiration, or more information about narcissism in general?  You can find me (Dana Morningstar) at:  Facebook/ThriveAfterAbuse YouTube/ThriveAfterAbuse Instagram/ThriveAfterAbuse ThriveAfterAbuse.com 

 Episode 1: Turning Your Pain into Your Power | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 5:12

It’s very normal and healthy to feel angry after being used, abused, or exploited–especially by someone you cared about (or by someone that you thought cared about you).  The challenge that many survivors of narcissistic abuse face is how to handle and work through what feels like overwhelming amounts of anger and rage.  In this episode I talk about how to become an “emotional alchemist” and some alternate ways to understand and harness the power of anger so that it works for you.

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