Tamela Rich: Life Lessons from the Road

POST UPDATE: With the National Park Service Centennial this year, the Park Service expects record crowds to all our parks, especially during summer vacation season. Death Valley is a park best visited before summer, as I explain in this TV interview. at the top of this post. Death Valley in “super bloom” of a generation If you need a further nudge for a spring visit to Death Valley National Park, this video from the Park Service even wets our whistles for a possible “super bloom” of wildflowers, a rare occurrence. It will all be over by May, so don’t delay! I love Death Valley, and as I said in the interview with WBTV-Bounce, I’d recommend entering the park from the Nevada side, where there is fascinating human history, from both the gold rush days and the dawn of the nuclear age. If you come from the California side, be sure to visit the ghost town of Rhyolite and the history museum in Beatty, both in Nevada. This rest of this article was originally posted on March 31, 2013.  Lost in Death Valley, after dark, with an inaccurate map Traveling with my parents in Death Valley National Park after sunset, we took a gravel road that was designed to cross the park. However, we found that it was completely unmarked, which left us to our own devices. Fork left or right? Our choices ended up in a cul de sac so we retraced our route back to tarmac some 70 miles away before we would run out of gas. Whew! What an adventure! Remember, the difference between an adventure and a catastrophe is whether you live to tell about it. Click the “podcast play button” at the top of this post to listen to a morning-after debrief with my parents at Mel’s Diner in Beatty, NV. You won’t want to miss it!  We all love the way Dad’s Subaru Forester handled the task, as you’ll hear, and Mom sings the praises of BioFreeze for her aching back. My parents are such good sports! Here’s a video my mom took through the windshield. Lost in Death Valley after sunset from TamelaRich on Vimeo.

I had a great time in April with my “Ask Me Anything” teleseminar. Questions ranged from how to find clean restrooms to how to travel with pets and inlaws. Do you have a vacation question for me? Just ask! The podcast attached to the top of this post captures two of the more lively segments from the session: how to find clean restrooms and the best welcome centers. Inquiring minds want to know about restrooms and travel plazas We all want to find clean restrooms, so here’s a secret: don’t limit your possibilities to gas stations and fast food joints. Hotels always have clean restrooms near the front lobby. Don’t worry, they won’t stop to ask if you’re a registered guest. That said, the restrooms usually have only one toilet for men and another one for women, so don’t take all the kids in at once and draw attention to what you’re doing. Pace your party. Apps for finding clean restrooms are in this blog, and come with great names: Sit or Squat, Whizzer and Diaroogle. I can’t vouch for any of them personally, but plenty of moms traveling with kids have. If you end up using any of the apps, please let me know your experience. About those welcome centers and travel plazas: they’re a great way to collect brochures that will entertain the kids and involve them in the trip. I talked about letting kids have a say in travel planning in this TV appearance. Welcome centers and travel plazas/truck stops mentioned in the “Ask Me Anything” teleseminar List of welcome centers by state Albert Lea MN has “Trail’s Travel Center”  * Pelican Truck Plaza in Billing, MTs has the best homemade pie. Recommended by locals. * Chamberlain SD has a super interpretive center at their rest stop * Great one in Pocomoke City MD  Worcester County. Knew the ferry schedule to New Jersey * Tamarack in Beckley WV * Tioga Welcome Center Pennsylvania Once again, you can listen to the podcast above or subscribe to my podcast on iTunes and Stitcher. I’ll be back with more from my Ask Me Anything teleseminar soon. If you would like to listen to the entire segment and get all the resources covered in the seminar, simply ask me by hitting this link.

A story by NPR earlier this year says voluntourism—volunteering while on vacation—is one of the fastest growing trends in travel today. More than 1.6 million volunteer tourists are spending about $2 billion each year in the communities they serve. Most volunteer tourists are Millennials between the ages of 20 and 25, and predominantly female. College students often do voluntourism to boost their resumes or gain experience in fields that require international travel. Today's podcast guests offer voluntourism by motorcycle to benefit the abandoned children of Peru and South Africa. But their voluntour clients are Baby Boomers and Gen Xers. Neale Bayly and Drew Alexander of Wellspring International Outreach joined me to talk about their special brand of voluntourism and to open our hearts to the transformation they've seen in themselves and in others who accompany them on these service projects. For more information on their work visit www.wellspring-outreach.org

Besides my family, I don’t often travel with others. When I do it’s usually with Jill, whom I frequently mention in my podcasts and blog posts. She lives in Ohio and I live in North Carolina, so we ride our motorcycles to a meeting spot, then tour a region together before going our separate ways. In September 2014 we met in Brattleboro, Vermont, and went on to tour parts of New England and New Brunswick, Canada, where she taught me a valuable lesson about letting go and living in the moment. Saint John and the Supermoon Our easternmost destination was Saint John, New Brunswick, where we pulled in at sunset, a sight I’ll never forget. There was a “Supermoon” that week, which means the moon was close to the Earth and full; it was so massive that I could have counted the craters and smelled the green cheese. The sun was setting behind us as the Supermoon rose before us. Jill described it as “A God Moment.” As we glided into town on the bridge over the harbor on the Bay of Fundy, both the pink-purple skies and that Supermoon reflected in the bay’s still waters like a painter’s landscape. Alas, I have no pictures of it for you; by the time we reached our lodgings it was nearly dark. Homeport B&B Speaking of which, while either of us go in for luxury accommodations very often, we adored the Homeport B&B and her owners. Ralph and Karen Holyoak cleaned out their personal garage to make room for our bikes and Ralph met us in the driveway with a flashlight to guide us in. He was born with a hospitality gene. After settling into our suite, we caught a cab downtown for a terrific meal then walked home, well after 10:00 p.m. Safe and sound. The B&B is situated on a bluff overlooking the city’s waterfront, where we witnessed sunrise from the glass-enclosed widow’s watch that next morning. Breakfast followed with some delightful fellow guests before we set off on foot for a day of exploration. Safe, friendly, walkable Saint John Saint John is designed for pedestrians. I always felt safe, even well after dark. People there are friendly and seem to be satisfied with their lives, judging by the placid looks on their faces and the pace at which they lived their lives. I’ve never before visited a city with such courteous citizens, from retail staff to my fellow patrons at Tim Horton’s. More about that in the podcast at the top of the post. You hear a lot about English-French tensions in Montreal, but I sensed none of that in New Brunswick, Canada’s only officially bilingual province. Factoid: New Brunswick was visited by Vikings, who called it “Vinland.” Saint John City Market is the oldest farmer’s market in Canada. The market’s roof is shaped like an inverted ship hull and there’s plenty of art and tourist kitsch to tempt you, in addition to international foods and local produce. If you got a Saint John postcard from me, chances are I bought it at the market.

Sometimes the people I meet in my travels give me an unexpected glimpse of a life that I could also be living. For better and for worse. On my recent swing through New England, I visited Shelburne Falls, Massachusetts, known for its pedestrian-only Bridge of Flowers. The bridge was built in 1908 for trolleys to cross the Deerfield River between the towns of Buckland and Shelburne. When the trolley line discontinued in 1928 the local women’s club took charge. Today, over 500 varieties of annuals and perennials are planted along the 400-foot span, thanks to the work of volunteers. After going shutter-crazy on the bridge with my new camera and touring some local art galleries, my traveling companion Jill and I returned to the Buckland side of the bridge, where we’d parked our bikes. Some tea and cherries with a Vietnam veteran McCusker’s Market and Deli was a great place to grab some local-organic produce to supplement our bagged lunches. Its tables faced the bridge; perfect for people-watching. Shortly after sitting down and opening our feed sacks, a man in his late ’60’s (or so) ambled over and took the seat to my right. I had seen him earlier when we parked and figured he was a local, just passing the lovely Saturday as we were. We said “Good afternoon,” and he smiled and returned the greeting. It didn’t take long for me to notice his un-showered tang, but I didn’t give it much thought. When I asked him if he lived in Buckland he replied that he was homeless until his benefits were approved and he could move near his daughter and grandchildren, some two hours away. He said it as matter-of-factly as I may have said I was from Charlotte. Candidly, I was in uncharted conversational territory. I asked if we could offer him something to drink and he graciously accepted the bottle of Honest Tea I proffered. He didn’t take his thanks over the top. I liked him for that. It came to me that I shouldn’t put his homelessness at the center of our conversation.  I had no business questioning him on the subject. I  decided to treat him as I do every other person I meet by chance on my travels. So I asked him if there was anyplace he would recommend we see before we left the area. We are more than our resumes convey Over the next forty-five minutes of engaging conversation, we learned that he had served in Vietnam, had been an EMT with an ambulance service in Hawaii, and spoke a First Nations language in addition to English. We were fascinated by what he told us about some of the tribe’s matrilineal customs and spiritual practices. We shared some cherries with him from the pint we bought at McCusker’s. At first he said he would only take a couple, but every few minutes or so I would wordlessly hand the green container over to him and he would delicately pluck one or two of them out by their stems. He refused everything else we offered him. He had an older-generation phone with pictures of his grandchildren on it, and told us a couple of cute stories about them. In the course of conversation it came out that the benefits he currently receives are mailed to him at his daughter’s address, but they are insufficient for lodging. He hoped to have everything approved so he could get a little place by January, which made me wonder how he would keep body and soul together in the months between. I looked at this week’s forecast. Daytime is mid-50’s and below freezing at night. Homeless or “houseless?” Several years ago I heard a middle-school student talk about what she learned abou...

First Lieutenant Alonzo “Lon” Cushing was decorated with the nation’s highest military honor for his service at Gettysburg. The presentation was more than 150 years in  the making. A West Point graduate, during the era of Cushing’s service, the Medal was not presented to officers. He fought at Bull Run, Anteitum, Chancelorrsville, Fredericksburg and finally Gettysburg, where he was immortalized on the final day of the fight on July 3, 1863. At Cemetery Ridge during Picket’s Charge, Cushing was hit and badly wounded. His sergeant urged him to go to the rear but he said he would fight it out or die in the doing. Over 10,000 Confederates charged while Lon used his thumb to stop his gun’s vent from burning his fingers, and continued shooting. When he was hit a third and final time, he discharged a shot at the enemy. “Faithful unto death” was his epitaph, and the dining room on the USS Gettysburg will be dedicated to him. Congressional exemption for a Civil War hero The honor for Cushing required a congressional exemption because, under rules for the award—created during the Civil War—it must be presented within three years of a qualifying act of heroism. Relatives and historians worked for over 40 years to get the honor bestowed on the war hero. The irony for me is that when I visited Gettysburg in 2013 the government was shut down in a partisan battle. I’m glad Congress can cooperate on something a year later! Fortunately the visitor center was open during the shutdown because it’s run by a private foundation instead of a federal agency. The Gettysburg experience On a more somber note, I was quite moved by what I learned on my visit—about history and about myself. I hope you’ll listen to the podcast from that visit at the top of this post and visit the post I wrote about it. I’ve visited several towns this year with Civil War history but the subject has always  been remote. The war became personal to me in the exhibit hall of the  Gettysburg National Military Park Museum. Comparing the uniforms and kits of the Union and Confederate soldiers, I was struck by how poorly outfitted Johnny Rebel was. They never stood a chance, and I married one of their descendants. The Confederates had some strange ideas and were fueled by false hopes and hubris, but at that moment, I recognized them as  family. Truth is, they’ve always been family, even before I married a Virginian. We’re all one human family.

I spent last week at the beach with my spouse. I enjoy sitting at the water’s edge as I read, write, contemplate and doze, but I’m not often in the water past my knees. When Matt takes his fishing pole out to the surf, I fall into a lull watching him cast, reel in and repeat. It usually induces rumination. One of those ruminations was the way travel leaves its imprint on you and how a purposeful traveler can leave the world a better place. Ted Simon, solo globetrotter sans GPS Lots of folks travel to expand their life’s purpose and find greater meaning in their lives.  Ted Simon is one of those people.  I met this legendary traveler at Overland Expo‘s Asheville, North Carolina venue earlier this month, and it could be said that he both inspired the modern overland movement and defined “purposeful travel” for an entire generation. Ted first traveled the world by motorcycle in 1973 at age 42, when “it just wasn’t done.” He made his first trip on a 500cc motorcycle, smaller than the one I ride today. And he did it with neither support crew nor GPS. Solo. He did it again at age 69, eight years ago. Here’s what he said about his accomplishments: People who thought of my journey as a physical ordeal or an act of courage… missed the point. Courage and physical endurance were no more than useful items of equipment for me, like facility with languages or immunity to hepatitis. The goal was comprehension, and the only way to comprehend the world was by making myself vulnerable to it so that it could change me. The challenge was to lay myself open to everybody and everything that came my way. The prize was to change and grow big enough to feel one with the whole world. Traveling for a vacation or a purpose, maybe even a cause There’s a difference between traveling for vacation, traveling for a purpose and traveling for a cause. A vacation is intended to be a time when you pull away from the everyday duties and schedules of life so you can rest and recreate. As an aside, I prefer to pronounce it “re-create” to remind myself that there’s more to recreation than fun and games. Travel is a one of many ways to spend a vacation and a great way to re-create your thinking and yourself. I hope to encourage you to travel—somewhere, anywhere—to get to know yourself, your history, your world. Ted Simon traveled the world solo because he wanted to make himself a better person. I consider this purposeful travel. To get the most of purposeful travel, try traveling alone, when you can really get to know yourself without someone else’s filter or influence (scroll down for tips on solo travel). This week my friend Neale Bayly, whom many of you will remember from our  TEDx talk, will lead another motorcycle adventure in South Africa. At the end of their tour the riders will visit the new orphanage his charity is building outside Johannesburg for an 84-year-old grandmother raising six children. Their parents died of AIDS. Neale travels for a cause: abandoned children around the world. Riders who tour with him raise or donate money for his charity’s projects....

This past Saturday I was privileged to keynote the North Carolina Occupational Therapy Association‘s Fall Conference. They asked me to address the question of self-care, since occupational therapists, like many people in the “helping professions,” very often find themselves emotionally fatigued by the work they also find to be satisfying. Far too many leave themselves no energy for themselves and their families. Imagine yourself in their shoes: helping patients relearn how to do things like dress themselves after a stroke, or feed themselves after a car accident that smashed a hand; dealing with insurance companies that don’t want to fund sufficient therapy visits; and interacting with family members of patients who are not coping well with the big changes in their loved ones. All in the same hour. Whew, I get tired just thinking about it. Burnout is a serious matter, here’s how I know I know a bit about where burnout can go and the need for self-care, as I discussed in both my TEDx Talk and in this radio interview from last night with Bonnie Graham. You can  hit the “play” button at the top of this post to hear me discuss with Bonnie my descent into despair and suicidal ideation, and the role that learning to ride a motorcycle played in the relaunch of my life. If you are in a helping profession, (including a full-time parent) here’s a Professional Quality of  Life Scale (self-assessment) that will help you gauge your “Compassion Satisfaction,” your “Burnout” and your “Secondary Traumatic Stress.” The occupational therapists found it to be a useful tool. Once you determine that you’re in a tough spot, it’s time to make some changes. Life is a series of re-launches As I told the occupational therapists, you relaunch your life with what you have, starting where you are. Many of their patients relaunch their lives after an accident with brain injuries and without certain limbs. I relaunched my life in 2010 with the aid of a motorcycle and a 7500-mile, 20-state road trip. One of the beauties of setting out on my own is that when I met people on the road, I didn’t have to share with them the train wreck I’d made of my life; I could instead emphasize what was going well. I told them I was traveling across this beautiful country on my own, on my motorcycle, helping a worthy cause. That’s an important takeaway: emphasize what’s going right in your life, even if it’s only your ability to draw breath. Start there. In turn, the people I met on my travels responded enthusiastically, suggesting places I should try to fit into my itinerary and telling me I was brave. That kind of positive reinforcement helped speed my emotional recovery. If you don’t have people in your life who give you positive reinforcement, widen your circle of friends—they’re out there, I promise. As I noted in my TEDx Talk and the radio interview,

By now, after three parts of our interview, you have fallen in love with world traveler Allan Karl, author of “Forks: A Quest for Culture, Cuisine and Connection” and Neale Bayly, motorcycle philanthropist. The re-entry zone: bittersweet feelings when a road trip draws to a close Just as our podcast series comes to a close, every journey must also close. As a matter of fact I’m posting this just a day after returning from my travels through New England and New Brunswick. Being on the road for 25 days in late summer is a blessing for which I am grateful. Now it’s back to client business. In this podcast, Allan, Neale and I talk about the re-entry zone: that mixed emotional state of happily anticipating the return home to family and friends while saying goodbye to the road. Allan finished his 62,000-mile adventure by traveling from Baltimore, Maryland to Southern California on the highways and byways. He tells a poignant story of a fellow traveler he met on the Blue Ride Parkway. Neale and I chip in with reflections on “mindful minimalism.” Good times. You can catch Part One here. Part Two is here. Here’s Part Three.

The first two Parts of this series are focused on round-the-world traveler and author Allan Karl’s adventures. Neale Bayly, adventure motorcyclist and philanthropist Neale is the founder and president of Wellspring International, a charity that supports orphaned children. Neale’s motorcycle adventure tours from around the world fund most of its operational costs. You may have seen his 2013 TV show, Neale Bayly Rides Peru, which aired on SPEED (now Fox Sports). Neale calls himself a “high speed commuter” because, as an international moto-journalist, he flies around, rides a motorcycle around a track or a remote country, then shuttles back to tell the tale. If you’ve ever wondered about the behind-the-scenes story of what looks like a sexy career, you’ll want to listen to Neale tell all right here. Allan Karl reveals more about his Bolivia trip than was included in his book, “Forks” Allan then continues his world-traveling tale in Bolivia talking about being invited to a family birthday party, ending in a funny story about a road rally. This is a podcast exclusive, folks, not even told in his beautiful book, “Forks: A Quest for culture, Cuisine and Connection.”

For everyone who asks me if I'm afraid to travel on my motorcycle alone, meet 83-year-old Sally Stanke, who got a commercial pilot's license in 1946 at age 19. That same year, Sally taught herself to ride a motorcycle as she drove her two-stroke Harley-Davidson 125 from Missouri to Florida, mixing her own oil and gas at every fuel stop. What a can-do woman! If you know someone that I should get to know near Hagerstown, MD and Gettysburg, PA, please contact me via my website TamelaRic

Thermopolis, Wyoming reminds me that we all need a steam valve. Basically, that's what Thermopolis is—North America's steam valve. Its the world's largest mineral spring, to boot. I stayed at the Fountain of Youth campground, which  has its own "Sacajawea hot spring," named after  the woman who led Lewis & Clark to the Pacific. The mineral water from the spring cascades through three pools, getting progressively cooler, which allows campers to pick the temperature they prefer to soak in. I enjoyed two days in the area soaking, exploring rock formations and hiking among the grazing deer at twilight. Enchanting. You can see spectacular pictures of the area here on my Flickr album. Poolside serenade During my last evening in the campground, under indigo skies, as Sacajawea's fountainhead tinked behind the audience of vacationers, our fellow campers Randy and Wormz serenaded us with singer-songwriter fare from the poolside bandstand. I especially loved Randy's rendition of "Suzanne" by Leonard Cohen. Wormz sang and played some of her original pieces, too. It reminded me of a house concert I once attended with cellist Daniel Sperry. I hope you'll listen to my interview with these talented musicians. They're having quite an adventure traveling the country in a conversion van. In the interview they mentioned some great festivals and outsider art installations that I've added to my list of places to visit. I bet you'll do the same. Listen up!

These will be the vacation snapshots you go back to time and again. Exotic beaches, yawn; metal sculptures in North Dakota, yeah!

I've mentioned before that Idaho is full of volcanic activity, and the spring's heat originates from an ancient volcano that's constantly venting.

We could wake up tomorrow morning and find that Yellowstone as we know it is gone. Its ultimate destiny is to look like Craters of the Moon.