The Roundtable of Gentlemen

Midgets! They muddle our mojitos, they muddle our margaritas and they’ve especially muddled this episode of the Round Table. Tune in to hear stories of muddling and more, including Stalin’s Area 51 Retard Plot and the return of your favorite segment and mine, Pedophile Corner! We’ve also got one of our favorites, Louis Katz, sitting in for our boy Eddie this week.

On this episode of The Round Table, Ben recounts his adventures after eating a tub of strawberry ice cream sprinkled with magic mushrooms on Saturday and talks about his recent foray into the world of diet pills, plus the rest of the gang discusses the end of the world, junior high fight clubs, and the porn collection of Osama Bin Laden.

It’s a special Mother’s Day edition of The Round Table! Tune in as Holden uses it as an excuse to be even creepier about his mother issues, plus we give our take on that Arab dude that died last week.

It’s a chill and relaxed episode of The Round Table on this, the most holy of days, Easter! Join us to hear tales of fast food horrors, why it pays to be a Nirvana fan, the skyrocketing rates of STDs among the senior population, and our most and least favorite music to listen to while having sex.

So some dumb bastard decided to let Jackie loose in a male strip club on Saturday night. The results? Terrifying. In addition to that, we’ve got conservatives in Lubbock, TX hosting an affirmative action bake sale, two traffic cops were busted in Los Angeles for appearing in a porn video on the clock and in uniform, and Eddie transfers his hate of Scientologists over to Hasids.

Holy hell, we’ve got a suicide at an open mic! Join us as we explore the obvious hilarity of the situation. We’ve also got Kevin fresh back from Florida with a wonderful story of mistaken identity which once again proves that he ain’t shit. Joining us in the Hut this week is Jermaine “Much Better Looking Comedian Than KB” Fowler and Nick Vatterott, who has been arrested an alarming number of times.

Whaling! The greatest hunt of all comes to the Round Table this week as we welcome special guest Ragnar Egilsson to dispel every single preconception you’ve ever had about Iceland. As far as the Table goes, Holden lords his most attractive member of Murderfist distinction over everyone, Ben tries to recover from a massively hallucinogenic weekend, Jackie gets stuck in a weird day-time talk show that only she is a part of, and Ed believes the Chinese have access to time travel.

That’s right, it’s our first ever live episode! Join us on stage (kinda) as Holden and Jackie finally realize how the weird and horrible things they say really are once they have to actually look at strangers while they say it, we discover our listeners are not as horrible of people as we are (or so they claim) and of course, murder and knives.

Now, normally we wouldn’t give two shits about a new Gandhi biography. However, a newly released book has revealed many Round Table worthy facts. More than we could ever ask for, in fact. In addition to that, Holden names his mother his favorite sponge, Ed calls for the death of multiple people, Kevin points out how terrible of a life Ben lives, and Ben talks about how terrible his life is.

It’s the hottest new league in sports: The RBL! Tune in to hear the endearing story of Ben’s foster brother making it the state championship and the poor boy’s romantic problems, plus Holden asks us just who the people are who made us the monsters we are today. Not surprisingly, most of the stories involve fights.

hey made it ! Well, I suppose I could say we made it. Murderfist, of which three members of the Round Table are in the group, did a 12 hour sketch marathon on Saturday. To match it, me and Ben did a 12 hour drinking marathon. Tune in to hear the day-after fallout. Plus, we’ve got number 1 fan and Ben’s college friend Dave Koehler in the studio! Ben once threw him through a window!

That’s right, we’re returning to what has oddly become one of our favorite subjects, breast milk! We’ve also got voodoo sex rituals, accidental racism (Maryland, Biggie, and Fried Chicken are involved), and our Oscar picks. They were done the night before the ceremony so tune in to hear how incredibly wrong we were with most of them.

Boners and breasts! Butts and bullying! We’ve got it all on this episode of The Round Table. Tune this week as Jackie further cements her reputation as the show’s resident psychotic, Ben tells us of his many, many in school suspensions, Holden gives us a boner story, Ed tells you how to score Xanax in Mexico, and Kevin explains why Cracker Day scared him even though he’s black. You don’t know what Cracker Day is either? Listen up to find out!

It’s Fight Night here at The Round Table! Tune in to hear about the almost-fight we got into on Saturday, tales of men getting thrown through windows, and an amazing story about a guy Ed knows who’s killed at least 20 people. We’ve also got a special Valentine’s Day segment from Holden! Ben speed dates the entire Table. It gets sexy.

Male breast reduction! It’s on the rise. Tip to all those potential steroid users out there: ya gotta work out, too. Otherwise, tits. In addition to that, Ben tells us about all the fast food restaurants he’s been fired from (many more than you would think), Kevin’s got a personal connection to the Super Bowl, Jackie names a dissected pig, Ed compares Silvio Berlusconi to Elvis, and Holden asks the crew about our potential last meals as it is likely that at least half of us will be facing execution some day.