Mom Enough: A Parenting Podcast

Many of us probably can remember a history class that seemed like nothing more than a list of names and dates to memorize. But when history is taught well, we learn powerful lessons that relate to our own lives, right here, right now. Author Danny Kravitz, an Emmy-winning screenwriter and professor at Columbia College in Chicago, brings his passion for story-telling to historical fiction books for school-age children, including his recently-published Tommy McKnight and the Great Election. As you will hear in this lively discussion, Marti & Erin are excited to introduce you to Danny’s work, which triggers a poignant memory for Marti of historical biographies that shaped the course of her life when she was only eight years old!   What has been your children’s experience – and your own – in learning history? Why do you think it is important for children and adults to learn about history? What historical biography or historical fiction books have you or your children read that have helped you feel personally connected to history?   To learn more about Danny's historical fiction books, click here.

Today's mothers often feel pressure to live up to what we think someone else expects of us. And, however we define “success” as a mother, we often seem to question whether we are measuring up. That certainly was true for the Minnesota moms who participated in a recent anthropological study conducted by Dr. Solveig Brown and published in her just-released book, All On One Plate: Cultural Expectations on American Mothers. Solveig joins Marti & Erin for a heartfelt discussion of the doubt and guilt so many moms experience, the ways moms have found to cope with the multiple pressures they feel and the powerful role of support and shared stories in easing moms’ struggles.   What do you see as most important to being a “good mom” in today’s world? What comes most easily to you as a mom and what are the biggest challenges you face in measuring up to your own expectations? What could you do to ease the pressure you feel and how could you strengthen your support network (if you think you need to)?   For Solveig's All On One Plate discussion guide, click here.

The cover of Nora McInerny Purmort’s book claims it is “for people who have laughed at a funeral or cried in a grocery store.” We say it’s for everyone! After bouncing from boyfriend to boyfriend, Nora finally found Aaron, with whom she was ready to spend her whole life. But brain cancer cut their marriage to only three years, leaving Nora a young widow on her own with a baby and the monstrous task of coping with devastating loss and her unexpected life as a so-called “hot young widow.” Through and beyond Aaron’s illness, Nora bared her soul and turned convention on its head, capturing the attention of people across the country. Marti & Erin welcome Nora’s powerful message that there is no one right way to grieve, no one right way to live.     Can you think of a very sad or frightening time in your life when you’ve used humor to cope? What do you see as some of the unspoken “rules” about how we ought to respond to something as serious as cancer or death? Nora McInerny Purmort and her husband chose to do things their own way; how can her story help others when they feel their own life crumbling?   For It's OK to Laugh, click here. For Still Kickin, click here. For Nora's My Husband's Tumor blog, click here.

Many children of all ages experience school anxiety, whether stressing out about academic performance, fearing bullies on the bus or feeling overwhelmed by separation anxiety when it’s time to leave home. This week’s Mom Enough guest, clinical psychologist Dr. Jordan Hart, has worked with many children and families who are struggling with these problems. And she brings to her conversation with Marti & Erin practical, effective, evidence-based advice for how parents can help children overcome school anxiety and build skills that will help them meet challenges throughout their lives.   Has your child experienced school anxiety? How did your child communicate those feelings to you and how did you respond? How did your response match what Dr. Jordan Hart advised in this Mom Enough discussion?   Note: At the end of this interview, stay tuned for a brief Relationships that Nurture feature on early language development and when you need to be concerned about your child’s language, brought to you by St. David’s Center for Child and Family Development.   For the Early Language Development tip sheet, click here. For our show with Dr. Hart on helping children thrive during and after divorce, click here. For Marti's tip sheet on separation anxiety, click here. For tips from St. David's Center on separation anxiety, click here.

In his popular book How Children Succeed (2012), Paul Tough identified qualities like grit, curiosity, self-control and optimism as most important to children’s longterm success. Drawing on a wealth of research (including the Minnesota Longitudinal Study of Risk & Adaptation), Paul challenged the ways we often try to predict or measure success and helped change the public conversation about the kinds of experience and environments children need from infancy to adulthood. Responding to readers’ desire for more practical recommendations about how to put these ideas into practice, Paul wrote a follow-up book, Helping Children Succeed. He joins Marti & Erin for a lively discussion of what parents, educators and others can do to help all children develop the qualities that will allow them to thrive in school and life.   What has your own experience taught you about the qualities Paul Tough discussed with Marti & Erin in this Mom Enough interview? For example, how do you think your childhood environment and experience influenced your grit, curiosity and self-control? What are you doing – or what can you do – to help your children develop those qualities?   For our How Children Succeed interview with Paul, click here.

In 2010, Jennifer Senior wrote a New York Magazine cover story about modern parenthood that triggered a firestorm of responses in the national media. Building on extensive research in such fields as psychology, sociology and history, as well as discussions with many parents “in the trenches,” Jennifer expanded her article to a book that explores how parenthood has changed in recent years, the impact of parenthood on everything from sleep to sex to life satisfaction, and the joy and awe parents so often express when they step back from the daily hassles to reflect on the overall experience of parenthood. In this week’s Mom Enough show, Jennifer joins Marti & Erin for a lively discussion you will want to listen to and share with family and friends!   In what ways do you think parenthood is different now from how it was for your parents or grandparents? In what ways are those changes for the better or worse? How does the “All Joy and No Fun” of the title resonate with your daily ups and downs and with your overall feelings about being a parent?   To read Jennifer Senior's cover story, click here. For Jennifer's website, click here.

Scientific breakthroughs have led to vaccines that have eliminated illnesses that used to cause death or lasting disabilities for both children and adults. (Marti remembers all too well the polio epidemic that struck the small town where her family lived before the polio vaccine was available.) Even when diseases have not been eradicated, vaccines offer significant protection to our children and society as a whole. Recently developed immunizations like the HPV vaccine provide protection against deadly cancers. To make sure you understand the best way to protect your children’s health, Marti & Erin welcome Dr. Andrea Singh from Park Nicollet Health Services for a crucial discussion of this important issue.   What new information did you gain from this Mom Enough discussion of immunizations? Do you have concerns about vaccines for your child? If so, where can you turn for scientifically accurate information?   For Park Nicollet Health Services, click here. For suggested well-child visits (ages birth to 21 years) and immunizations, click here.

Ten years ago, with his bestselling book Last Child in the Woods as a springboard, San Diego journalist Richard Louv and a handful of colleagues (including Mom Enough’s host Marti) founded the Children & Nature Network (C&NN). That organization has been a major leader in the movement to connect children and nature, a go-to place for information on research, community resources and opportunities to share ideas with people around the world. Now Rich has written a follow-up book, Vitamin N, zeroing in on concrete strategies for families, schools, healthcare organizations and communities. Tune into Rich’s conversation with Marti & Erin for inspiration and tips on what you can do to make sure your children and others in your community get the “vitamin N” they need!   In a typical week, how much time do your children spend outside and in what kinds of activities? Based on what you’ve heard from Richard Louv about the importance of “vitamin N,” do you think your children should spend more time connecting with nature? What would help?   For the C&NN Research Library, click here. To take the Vitamin N Challenge, click here. For Family Nature Clubs and a free tool kit, click here. For a community forum to connect directly with other Family Nature Club families, click here. For the Every Kid in a Park program, click here. For Together in Nature: Pathways to a Strong, Closer Family, click here.

No doubt you have heard a lot about why the attachment between you and your child is so important to your child’s lifelong development. But you also may have received mixed messages about what you need to do to build the kind of attachment that will put your child on the path to lifelong healthy development. Marti & Erin are delighted to welcome to this week’s show one of the world’s top researchers on attachment to set the record straight about what is and isn’t necessary in order to give your child this important foundation. (Marti is especially pleased because Dr. Alan Sroufe was one of her major mentors when she was working on her doctorate.)   What messages have you received from family, friends or media about how to build a good attachment with your child? How did Dr. Sroufe support or refute things you had heard before? To what extent did this show ease your anxiety about being “mom enough” or “dad enough” with your children?

Whether it’s news accounts of natural disasters or terrorism, sexually loaded images on TV or marital conflict in our own homes, many things in our children’s daily lives compel us to have uncomfortable or difficult conversations. What can children manage or comprehend at different ages? What words should we use – and what tone should we strive for – when children ask questions that make us squirm? How do we help children feel safe and secure while still being honest about the hard things that can and do happen in the real world? Psychologist Kate Rickord from St. David’s Center for Child & Family Development joins Marti & Erin for a thoughtful conversation about addressing tough topics and having difficult conversations with your children, whatever their ages.   What topics do you find most uncomfortable to discuss with your children? What did you find helpful in this Mom Enough discussion?   For 4 Tips on How to Talk with Your Child about Difficult Topics, click here. For St. David's Center, click here. For St. David's Center's Mental Health Services, click here.

It’s common for children (and adults, for that matter) to worry about the dangers of tornadoes, blizzards and other major weather events. And, worried or not, we and our children may wonder about the meaning of different kinds of clouds or how a hail storm happens on a hot summer day. Belinda Jensen turned her own childhood curiosity into a career as a popular meteorologist on KARE-TV (NBC). Now she has written a 6-book children’s series that is sure to fuel fascination with the weather and, as she discusses with Marti & Erin, also help more girls and boys discover the excitement of learning about science.   What questions or concerns do your children have about the weather? What helpful ideas did you get from this Mom Enough show with Belinda Jensen for addressing children’s worries and promoting their curiosity and learning?   To learn more about Belinda's books, click here. For Bel the Weather Girl experiments you can try at home, click here.

Did you know that heart disease is the number one killer of women and that death rates are increasing in women ages 35 to 54? Too many of us women are not aware, nor do we know about the risk factors and warning signs that are unique to women. But knowledge is power and, in many cases, heart disease in women and related deaths are preventable. Women of all ages need the information Dr. Elizabeth Grey provides in her conversation with Marti in this week’s Mom Enough show. This is crucial information not only for our own health, but also our children’s, whether they are infants or teens; it’s never too early to establish healthy patterns that help prevent heart disease.   What new information about heart disease in women did you gain from this Mom Enough discussion with cardiologist Elizabeth Grey? Given her guidance about preventing heart disease, in what ways could you take steps to reduce the risk of heart disease for yourself? For your children?   For a tip sheet on heart disease in women, click here. For the Minneapolis Heart Institute Foundation, click here.

As much as we’d love to make life easy for our children, they inevitably will experience stress. And, as research demonstrates, some stress actually is positive in that it allows children to discover and practice their coping and problem-solving strategies. But when – and under what conditions – does stress become toxic stress and undermine our children’s longterm health and well-being? And what does this research mean for us as parents? You won’t want to miss this important discussion with Dr. Megan Gunnar from the University of Minnesota’s Institute of Child Development!   Based on what you learned in this Mom Enough interview with Dr. Megan Gunnar, give some examples of stress that might have a positive effect on your child’s development. Thinking about the importance of preventing toxic stress in your child’s life, what steps can you take to protect your child at home, at school and in the larger community?   To view an Institute of Child Development video on toxic stress, click here. For our What is Toxic Stress? sheet, click here. For our Understanding the Biology of Stress in Young Children sheet, click here. To view a video presentation about buffering children from toxic stress, click here.

In the early months of a child’s life many dads struggle to find their role in caring for the baby and supporting mom through those exhausting days and nights. And sometimes we moms send messages, subtle and not-so-subtle, that dad just can’t measure up to our standards of care. But, in the long run, everyone will win (mom, dad, child) if dad is fully engaged as a caregiver. Andre Dukes, Family Academy Director for the Northside Achievement Zone in Minneapolis, joins Marti & Erin to discuss the role of father in child development, the benefits of father involvement throughout a child’s life and what we all can do to help men be the dads their children need.   In what ways is the father of your children involved in their daily lives? How is that the same as or different than how your fathers were involved when you two were young? Based on what you heard on the role of father in child development in this Mom Enough show, how could you help your children’s father become even more comfortable and confident as a dad?

Many of us are uneasy talking with our adolescents about topics related to teen sexual health, such as how to prevent sexually transmitted infections or choose the most effective birth control. We may worry that talking about these issues will encourage our kids to become sexually active too soon. But our sons and daughters are more likely to make wise and healthy choices if we talk openly and supportively with them. Family physician Amy Bonifas joins Marti & Erin for a candid and informative discussion of what your teens need to know and what you can expect when you take your adolescent daughter for a medical visit.   What have you taught your kids about sexual health? How do you feel about talking with them about this sensitive and important topic? What did you find most helpful and interesting in Marti & Erin’s teen sexual health conversation with Dr. Bonifas?