Listen, Learn & Love Hosted by Richard Ostler show

Listen, Learn & Love Hosted by Richard Ostler

Summary: Welcome to our podcast! My name is Richard Ostler (twitter:; FB:; IG: and am a native of Salt Lake City. I am the author of "Listen Learn and Love: Embracing LGBTQ Latter-day Saints at Amazon ( and Deseret Book ( I am the author of two recent Ensign articles on ‘How the Savior’s Healing Power Applies to Repenting from Sexual Sin’ (August 2020/YSA Digital Only) and ‘7 Tips for Overcoming Pornography Use’ (October, page 72) I have degrees from the University of Utah and Brigham Young University (business). I married my best friend and eternal companion Sheila Juergens of Houston, Texas in 1990 and we are the parents of six children and several grandchildren and live near Cottonwood High School in Salt Lake City. I believe in and am deeply committed to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and want it to work for a wider group. The name ‘Papa Ostler’ resulting from being introduced to Twitter by my High School age son Matt in 2010. I wanted the high school age youth to know I wasn’t their age as I interacted with them … hence the name Papa Ostler. I served as a YSA Bishop in the West Valley City/Magna area of Salt Lake (released in 2016) and met some of the finest people I will ever know. In addition to meeting with wonderful active members of my Ward, I reached out and connected via social media (mostly via the private messaging features of FB and Twitter) with many of our inactive members and their non-member friends. Over time, many felt comfortable meeting with me and sharing their stories. Through hundreds of interviews and ‘listening to understand’, I was able to ‘see’ the church from the eyes of those on the outside. Many feel the church is their ‘spiritual home’ but feel uncomfortable attending for a variety of reasons such as work-in-progress testimonies, concerns about church history, feeling unworthy because of past or current sin, don't fit the cultural mold, role of women, are LGBTQ and/or feel God's LGBTQ childen should be more welcomed in our congregations, etc. This podcast is designed to 'Have a Conversation' about some of the more complicated issues in our church to help all of us 'listen, learn and love' so we can minister in a more effective way to all of Heavenly Father’s children. Most podcasts will be from our LDS LGBTQ friends to give them voice so we can better understand their road, touch their cross, learn from them, and minister to them as directed by President M. Russell Ballard when he said "We need to listen to and understand what our LGBT brothers and sisters are feeling and experiencing. Certainly, we must do better than we have done in the past so that all members feel they have a spiritual home where their brothers and sisters love them and where they have a place to worship and serve the Lord(Nov 2017 BYU Devotional)." Some podcasts will be from LGBTQ allies sharing their experiences and how to be helpful. Other podcasts will be from guests talking about other complicated topics such as mental health, returning from a mission early, overcoming sin, and faith challenges. Are podcast are indexed by category at Thank you for joining us. You can't donate to this podcast. There are no sponsors. But you can leave a review/rate the podcast on the platform you are listening. With love, Richard 'Papa' Ostler ❤ *I will respond to your e-mails*

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 Episode 353: Al Carraway, Noted LDS Author and Speaker | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:04:01

My friend Al Carraway joins us from her new home in upstate New York. Al, who was on Episode 114, talks about her new book “Wildly Optimistic” and several recent powerful and vulnerable blog posts. If you want to find hope during difficult times, please listen to this podcast. Al has great insights to help all of us grow closer to our Heavenly Father, better support each other, and find strength during difficult experiences. Al is one of my personal heroes. I encourage everyone to read her book and blogs which can be found at: On behalf of all of us, thank you Al for your beautiful life mission to bring others to Christ through our restored Church.

 Episode 352: Jace Ure (Non-Binary Latter-day Saint) and Their Parents | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:08:20

My friend Jace Ure, age 15, joins us to share their journey as a non-binary Latter-day Saint. Jace is joined by their parents Kerin and Aimee, deeply committed Latter-day Saints, who share how they are supporting Jace—who are new on this road and Jace came out only three months ago. This is a great podcast of “living your religion” when faced with unique family situations—resulting in the Ure family coming together in a beautiful way. It’s really a love story. If you are parents of a LGBTQ child, please listen to this podcast. It will give you tools and insights to better support your child. If you are LGBTQ, it will give you hope. Thank you Ure family for being on the podcast. I was deeply moved hearing your story. You are all awesome

 Episode 351: Ashley Rankin, RM, Age 25, Divorced | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:21:36

My friend Ashley Rankin (Registered Nurse) joins us to share her two year marriage that ended in divorce about two years ago. Ashley shares why she felt the marriage was the right decision in the beginning, the progression of how things started to change, and how it ended a few months before their second anniversary. Ashley shares the pain and trauma that resulted from both her marriage and divorce process. She also shares a few lessons she has learned on her road to healing in the two years since her divorce. If you are in a dark place and need someone who can give you tools to find hope and a way forward, please listen to Ashley's podcast. You can reach out to her with any questions, or if you need support, on facebook or Instagram (@ashley__rankin). Ashley is brave, courageous, and strong with a deep understanding of her relationship with her Heavenly Parents and the role the Savior and His Atonement play in grief, healing, and finding hope after hardship.

 Episode 350: Jordan Stuart, Age 30, Married Father of Three, Faith Crisis | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:08:32

Episode 350: Jordan Stuart, Age 30, Married Father of Three, Faith Crisis by Richard Ostler

 Episode 349: Spencer and Emily Tycksen, Pornography | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:19:12

Episode 349: Spencer and Emily Tycksen, Pornography by Richard Ostler

 Episode 348: Jon Gossett, Suicide Prevention | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:12:35

My friend Jon Gossett joins us to talk about his efforts to prevent suicide and the organization he started If you are suicidal or want to help others, please listen to this podcast with Jon, check out his organization and his podcast at Thank you for being on the podcast my good friend Jon and you efforts to save lives. You are making a huge difference for good.

 Episode 347: Hayden Paul and Bo Buchi, Healing/Pornography | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:46:04

Hayden Paul (episode 328 and 340) returns with his former therapist Bo Buchi CMHC to talk about Bo’s clinical expertise to help solve Hayden’s porn use. Bo (active LDS, masters degree, licensed clinical therapist) has great insights to help others solve porn. These two men talk about practical clinical tools and the power of our Savior Jesus Christ to end porn use. To solve porn takes a team effort. Please listen to this podcast to gain additional insights from a clinical therapist to end porn use or help others. Hayden can be reached at; and Bo at or You can also check out my October Ensign article on solving porn: Thank you Hayden and Bo for all your great work to help others solve porn use. This is a powerful podcast that will help many

 Episode 346: Dr. Anthony Sweat, BYU Professor, New Book “Repicturing the Restoration” | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:09:38

My friend Anthony Sweat, artist and associate professor of Church history and doctrine at BYU, joins us to talk about his new book “Repicturing the Restoration”. This wonderful book is twenty-five paintings that portray previously unpictured Restoration scenes, coupled with historical and artistic explanations. It includes The First Visions, Jane Neyman and the First Baptism for the Dead, The Chamber of Father Whitmer, Joseph and William Fight and Forgive, and (my favorite) The Ordination of Q. Walker Lewis. If you’d like to increase your faith of and testimony in the Restoration, please read this book and share it with others. It is available at or You can follow Brother Sweat on IG @brotheranthonysweat and check out his work at Thank you for being on the podcast Brother Sweat and your unique life ministry to help others unto Christ though our restored Church.

 Episode 345: Dr. Cameron Staley, Solving Pornography | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:20:24

My friend Cameron Staley (active LDS) is a clinical psychologist living in Idaho helping others with mental health concerns including unwanted pornography viewing. If you want to end unwanted pornography use or better help others, PLEASE listen to this podcast. Cameron has unique research-based insights to help others solve this concern. More on his online self-directed program for pornography can be found here at Life After Pornography ( Please check out his TEDx talk on Changing the Narrative Around the Addiction Story ( and his Facebook page The Life After Series ( with additional resources for mental health and pornography concerns. Also check out his Book of Mormon novel In The Hands of the Gadiantons ( You can also check out my Ensign article at Thank you for being on the podcast Cameron. I was deeply moved with the insights you shared to help others end pornography. You bring fresh perspective with new and helpful tools to end porn use in the lives of our great Latter-day Saints friends walking this road.

 Episode 344: Abby Weidmer, Married Mother of Two, Emotional Health | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:07:33

My friend Abby Weidmer joins us to share her journey with emotional health (relationship OCD and scrupulosity). Abby first dealt with this on her mission about 10 years ago in the Belgium Netherlands mission and then again when she got engaged to her husband Kevin. Abby has learned so much as she faced this head-on and managing it on this difficult road. Abby felt impressed to start a blog to share her story ( Please check it out! You can also contact her about sharing your story on this blog. And you can follow Abby on Instagram @the.soulofthings. Thank you Abby for being on the podcast and bravely sharing your story. You are brave, courageous—and that helps others!

 Episode 343: The Real OCD Club at BYU | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:16:26

My friends Miranda McQuarrie, Brooke Taylor, Katelyn Garcia and Derek Baker (all BYU students with OCD) join us to talk about their various forms of OCD (including scrupulosity, relationship OCD, harm OCD, pedophilia OCD, sexual orientation OCD, and existential OCD). They are brave and courageous as they share their stories. To help others, they started The Real OCD Club which can be found on Instagram @realocdbyu and Facebook at You can read Derek’s Ensign article at If you suffer from OCD, wonder if you may have it, or want to help others who suffer, please listen to their podcast and connect with the club. They want you to know that they are not professionals and they are not trained therapists. They just want to offer help and resources as support to those who want to learn more and to those who are struggling. You can reach Miranda on Facebook at “Miranda McQuarrie”, Brooke at @brookie_tay on Instagram, Katelyn @katelyncgarcia on Instagram, and Derek @dkbaker8 on Instagram. Thanks for being on the podcast. All four of you are awesome. Your needed work is helping many.

 Episode 341: Greg and Krista Evans, Wonderful Son Luke Died by Suicide Nov 2019 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:29:04

My dear friend Greg and Krista Evans join to talk about their wonderful son Luke ( They talk about his brutal journey with his emotional health, how everyone fought to keep him alive, and how his mental illness led to his passing. Greg and Krista are PROUD of Luke as he bravely fought his illness and share more about the accomplished young man. Krista blogs about Luke at I encourage everyone to read her powerful blogs. Thank you Greg and Krista for being on the podcast (and Luke as we felt your presence) and the courage to share your story as it helps all of us. You two are brave and courageous and have wonderful insights that are helping others. ** Please check out my new Book** Deseret Book: Amazon:

 Episode 340: Hayden and Savannah Paul, Pornography | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:33:54

Hayden (episode 328) returns with his dear wife Savannah to talk to other couples working to solve pornography. Savannah has great insights for a partner working to solve pornography including how she handled Hayden's slip-up once they were engaged. Dozen have reached out to Hayden and Savannah since Episode 328, and they started their own podcast to help other couples. Please see If you want to solve pornography in your own life, help someone else, or navigate a relationship where one is working to solve pornography, please listen to this episode. Hayden and Savannah have hope-filed/non-shaming insights through the Atonement of Jesus Christ to help others. Dear friends, please have hope you can put this behind you. You are one day closer. Check out my October Ensign article at Thank you Hayden and Savannah for being on the podcast. You two are awesome. You can reach Hayden at and Savannah at

 Episode 339: Dina Alexander, Teaching Children about Sex and Pornography | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:10:39

Dina Alexander, noted LDS author and speaker, joins us to talk about her organization called Education and Empower Kids ( Dina talks about the books she has written on how to teach your children about sex and avoiding pornography in healthy and non-shaming ways. Dina has series of books on these topics that are age appropriate with workbooks to help parents have these important discussions. If you are a parent, grandparent or a local leader who wants better tools to teach about sex and tools to help others solve pornography, please listened to Dina’s remarkable insights. Please check out to connect with Dina and for a list of her books and other resources. Thank you my friend Dina for being on the podcast. Your work is so needed.

 Episode 338: Sam Bird, Charlie Bird’s Younger Brother, Supporting a LGBTQ Family Member | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:12:47

Sam Bird (RM from Bolivia and Columbia, BYU Business Student, age 21) talks about supporting and learning from his older brother Charlie. Sam recounts, on their Mount Kilimanjaro hike, where Charlie came out as gay. Sam shares the story from his perspective—it’s a beautiful story of too close brothers staying close. How nothing changed. Sam shares what he has learned, advice to other family members, insights into Christ’s teaching to ‘Love One Another’, and his love/respect for Charlie. If you are a family member with an LGBTQ sibling, please listen to Sam’s podcast. He will give you insights and better tools to support, love and accept your LGBTQ family members. Thank you for being on the podcast Sam. Both you and Charlie are great men and give me hope for the future of our Church and society. Please read Charlie’s book at and listen to Charlie and Ben’s podcast at ** Please check out my new Book** Deseret Book: Amazon:


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