Worst Collection Ever

Manhunter [vol 3] #25 (2006) Kate Spencer aka Manhunter IV goes to a Los Angeles power-pop showcase with Obsidian and some friends. They are ambushed in the club by Sweeney Todd aka Handsome Solomon Grundy. A fight ensues with a psionic straight razor and some slicin’ & dicin’ just as the paparazzi show up. Also, Wonder Woman stops by looking for some legal representation. Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Route 666 #3 (2002) ROUTE 666 follows Cassie, a gymnast on an alternate Earth-like planet, who develops the power to see dead people. She can’t stop inadvertently killing those around her so she gets committed to a sanitarium (welcome home) run by a cannibal Tobias Funke. Tobias eats a dude’s neck so Cassie bolts and ruins the lives of a local sheriff and his son.  Also, let’s not forget this time…..money plane. Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Silver Sable and The Wild Pack #3 (1992) Welcome back to the show, Silver! It’s a shame that Silver Sable never really gets more of a shine (pun intended) in the Marvel media offerings. She’s got a unique look and she likes to f*ckfight with her ex-husband Lou Gramm, the Foreigner. She’s also got a rogues gallery (or maybe just a single rogue) featuring the likes of Gattling, the unholy union of Brock Lesnar and Jesse Ventura’s gun from PREDATOR. We also get to hang out with Silver’s Wild Pack consisting of a Proud Boy, a torture enthusiast, the forgotten Bucky and the Sandman. He’s there too. Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Outcasts #3 (1987) OUTCASTS is about the mutant-hating future where they send said mutants to the moon to hang out with corporate Pinhead at a resort colony where the men get gassed to death. The women and their children are harvested for enzymes that let old people live forever and get sexually aroused. Fighting against the status quo are the Outcasts, comprised of Ricardo Montalban, a blue zombie, albino Kane and cyborg Sloth from THE GOONIES. Also, some dude gets impaled by a skateboard. Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Comics’ Greatest World: Hero Zero #1 (1993) In this Dark Horse offering, some kid runs out into the freezing Nevada desert in the middle of the night to turn himself into a giant pastel Iron Man-looking ripoff. It’s not for nothing though as he punches a reluctant dragon and shatters it into pygmy monsters. Also, we meet up again with the Rimjob and the Waffle Aliens from our previous encounter with COMICS GREATEST WORLD. Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Thunderstrike #13 (1994) Thunderstrike and Luke Cage team up to track down a former college basketball standout-turned-bison monster into the bowels of a barbershop where a rouge S.H.I.E.L.D. operative whips out his Mandroid. We’ve also got some phone-related action as Luke uses the phone inside of a renovated porno theatre while Mephisto (maybe?) has an extremely moist conversation with a henchman. On top of all that, Thunderstrike becomes roommates with a Celestial murderess who has never seen the original STAR WARS! Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Hourman #8 (1999) DC decided that after a few random JLA appearances that the new android Hourman was hip enough to get his own series. It was a dubious call to some but adding Snapper Carr as a human tether is not going to help you in the long run. In this issue, Hourman isn’t even there so we’re stuck with jabroni-ass Snapper bargaining with demons over cheesecake, making ketchup pentagrams and generally just sitting in a swamp of his own sweat.  Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Poison Elves #19 (1996) POISON ELVES was a super-indie cult comic about, well, elves that like to dress up like ninjas and seek vengeance against other elves and maybe some humans.  In this particular issue, Lusiphur the Assassin Elf drops some serious ultra-violence on a warehouse full of villains (?) that may or may not have killed his father and caused his mother to get gangrene in her foot. Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Starjammers [vol 2] #5 (2005) STARJAMMERS are a group of Marvel space pirates, one of which is Cyclops’s dad. Since that would be interesting, he doesn’t appear in this book. We do get in its place the tale of a young military cadet disillusioned with what he’s been fighting for as the government raids a planet of Groots to use their seeds for drug snacks. FYI - there was some audio botching in the later half of the ep. We did our best to get it right but we apologize for the grossness of the audio. Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

JLA Classified #6 (2006) Booster Gold screws around in Doctor Fate’s tower and accidentally sends a bunch of JLAers and himself to Hell. Instead of being melted and tortured by the Spinner of Lies, fast food franchise owner Etrigan approaches them with the option to work at his burger joint and avoid demon slaughter.  Meanwhile, back on non-Hell Earth (but really, what’s the difference), Power Girl and Guy Gardner get snippy with each other and devise a plan to save their friends. We never get to that plan but we do witness Guy offering to lick Power Girl’s whole face like Rick James in the club. Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Jon Sable, Freelance #16 (1984) Jon Sable (possibly a distant relative of Silver Sable) is a hitman-for-hire that specializes in Godkiller firearms and having sex with jewel thieves in Frank Lloyd Wright-designed homes. He’s such a good freelance hitman that he built a physical representation of HOGAN’S ALLEY on the NES in his own home.  In this particular issue, Jon and Maggie The Jewel Thief rescue the formula for Coca-Cola from a group of nerds and shoot the leader to death with foot-long bullets. Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

The Next #1 (2006) THE NEXT is DC’s stab at a mid-80s low budget teenage movie premise about gnarly dudes and dudettes screwing with the space-time continuum, presented thru the filter of 1999 MTV Spring Break but released in the mid-2000s. The aforementioned teenagers and their translucent dog show up in our timeline, cause a young woman to get hit by a bus, only to be revived by a group of dead presidents. There’s also an unrelated space-time rip that Superman goes full Mr. Miyagi on while Metron watches because if you’re looking to launch your hip new heroes, its best to have the laziest member of the New Gods on board.  There’s also a spot in here where character actor Luis Guzman received the Tongan Death Grip. Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Supreme Power #16 (2005) SQUADRON SUPREME is one of those Marvel properties that they keep trying to get to work — and it DOES to a point — but it never feels bigger than you would think it is. Here’s another take on it where Hyperion is raised by the government, Doctor Spectrum makes out with amphibious telepaths and Whizzer has a holographic mother. Special appearance by comedian and character actor Ken Marino. Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Comics’ Greatest World: Out Of The Vortex #1 (1993) Oh man, time for some Dark Horse comics! In this offering, an alien in a dope-looking outfit appears out of nowhere in a military base located in Cinnabar Flats, Nevada. “Cinnabar” makes us think of cinnamon which is appropriate because our alien guy (Vortex the Heretic) encounters opposition in the form of space spartans carrying electric Eggo waffles. When it's all said and done, a big bubble of lethal toothpaste envelopes the base while our alien antihero makes a brave Army lieutenant his “space secretary.” Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com

Team Titans #4 (1992) TEAM TITANS is a superhero team held up by the premise that Donna Troy’s son put chemical additives in our food around the turn of the century and made us all dummies so that we’d accept his genocide campaign. Sounds terrible but on the bright side, this gimmick stuff gave kids superpowers and, in a ploy to stop this tragedy from happening, travelled back in time to start a rock band in SoHo. We also get the love child of Kalibak and former World Champion Sheamus threatening a muscular 10yr old in the MoMa. Thank goodness for ZERO HOUR cleaning this all up for us. Continue the conversation with Shawn and Jen on Twitter @angryheroshawn and @JenStansfield and email the show at worstcollectionever@gmail.com