ON BOYS Podcast

Photo by Independentman via Flickr What is masculinity? It's a question that's not easy to answer. But it's an important one for parents and educators of boys to tackle because the primary question for all boys, is "What is it to be a man?" In this episode, Jen & Janet discuss: * So-called "toxic masculinity" & the idea that boys are "broken" * Healthy masculinity * Changing expectations of boys and men * How to help boys wrestle with dueling definitions of masculinity Links we mentioned (and more!) in Episode 105 Teenage Brothers on Sex, Social Media, and What Their Parents Don’t Understand, part of The Cut's series, How to Raise a Boy Michael Kimmel and Lisa Wade Discuss Toxic Masculinity The Boys Are Not All Right, by Michael Ian Black #DownWithManUp & #YesAll, by Jennifer L.W. Fink Joe Ehrmann on “Be a Man” (TEDx talk) The Art of Manliness (podcast) What does masculinity mean to you? How do you help boys wrestle with the concept of masculinity? Leave a comment below.

Photo by Stewart Baird via Flickr "By age 9, the default emotion for most boys is anger." -- Michael Gurian It's easy to feel overwhelmed and helpless in the face of a boy's anger, whether you've got a toddler throwing a temper tantrum or a teenager on a rampage. But learning to respond to boys' anger with love and patience is one of the best gifts we can give to our guys. In this episode, Jen & Janet discuss: * How the "boy code" subtly encourages anger * The biology of anger * Techniques parents & teachers can use to manage boys' angry outburts * The link between anger, aggression and violence (SPOILER ALERT: anger doesn't inevitably lead to violence) Links we mentioned (and more!) in Episode 104: Masterminds and Wingmen: Helping Our Boys Cope with Schoolyard Power, Locker Room Tests, Girlfriends, and the New Rules of Boy World, by Rosalind Wiseman Boy Talk: How You Can Help Your Son Express His Emotions by Mary Polce-Lynch Tips on Dealing with Anger -- From a 7-Year-Old Boy by Jennifer LW Fink He Is So Angry! by Janet Allison Teenage Angst, or Something More Serious? by Jennifer LW Fink SPECIAL NOTE: CLICK HERE for free access to Janet's 75-minute audio file - Learning Lab: Boys and Anger with a bonus pdf on "The Boy Code and Anger." Because you asked...you can WATCH the uncut version of this podcast on YouTube.

Photo by woodleywonderworks via Flickr Sports are a HUGE part of boy world -- and that's a problem for boys who aren't interested in or don't particularly enjoy athletics. In this episode, Jen & Janet discuss: * Why it's so important for parents to separate their athletic ambitions from their sons' * How families can resist social pressure to sign up for sports * Alternative ways to encourage activity, build teamwork and socialize * How to identify and support your sons' true interests * Strategies parents and teachers can use to make recess and PE class more tolerable for (and inclusive of!) non-athletic kids Links we mentioned (and more!) in Episode 103: The Last Boys Picked: Helping Boys Who Don't Play Sports Survive Bullies and Boyhood, by Janet Sasson Edgette Helping "The Last Boys Picked" Survive in Sports-Obsessed Schools by Janet Sasson Edgette Signs at School of Troubled Non-Athletic Boys by Jennifer LW Fink Being a Non-Sporty Boy in a Sports-Driven Culture by Janet Sasson Edgette ======================= Watch the UNCUT version on Youtube here. ======================= What's your experience?  Share in the comments below...

Photo by Runar Pederson Hokestad via Flickr Sam had high hopes for this 12th birthday. But things didn’t go as planned. Instead of a day of adventure and independence, Sam’s had an encounter with a cop and learned he must wait another four years to ride his ATV independently on the trails. Dealing with disappointments is a key life skill. In this episode, Jen and Janet discuss how the “man box” stifles boys’ emotional expression and share strategies parents and teachers can use to help boys cope with disappointments big and small. Links we mentioned (or should have!) in Episode 102: Teach Your Boys To Comfort Others in a Crisis by Kim Hamer How Do I Cope with Grief? by Eric Alper Tapping Into Grief with Self-Empathy by Carole Downing Helping Boys Develop Emotional Intelligence by Ian Thomas Encouraging Emotional Intelligence in Boys by Jennifer LW Fink Your Son’s Ability to Tolerate Frustration and Rejection is More Important Than You Know by Jennifer LW Fink Parenting Through Disappointment, Loss and Grief by Carole Downing ========================= Watch the UNCUT version on Youtube. ========================= How have you helped your boys navigate disappointment, loss, and grief? Please share in the comments below.

Photo by Lars Plougmann via Flickr Few things cause boys (and their families) as much stress as HOMEWORK. In many cases, homework battles turn into outright power struggles -- with no winners. In this episode, Jen & Janet discuss: * Why boys struggle with homework * The impact of homework on boys' academic achievement * What to do about "meaningless" homework * How a "too cool for school" attitude can interfere with learning * Why arguing about homework might not be the best use of your time and energy Links we mentioned (and more!) in Episode 101 How to Get Boys to Do Homework, Part 1 By Jennifer LW Fink How to Get Boys to Do Homework, Part 2 By Jennifer LW Fink Homework Tip #3: Let Your Kids Figure Out When & Where to Work by Jennifer LW Fink Homework at My House by Jennifer LW Fink Homework Solutions in the Age of Distraction by Devorah Heitner, Phd ==================== Watch the UNCUT version on Youtube here. ==================== What great solutions have you found that work with your boys?  Please share!

What do you get when you combine a former educator/family coach with a writer/mom of 4 boys? A podcast that's all about parenting, teaching and reaching tomorrow's men! In this episode, you'll meet your co-hosts, Janet Allison and Jennifer L.W. Fink. Learn how they connected -- and why they believe it's so important for parents and teachers of boys to learn about the Boy Code.   Jen (left) & Janet (right) Links we mentioned (or should have!) in Episode 100: BoysAlive! (Janet's website) and consider joining the Boys Alive! Facebook group, too! BuildingBoys (Jen's website) and consider joining the Building Boys Facebook group, too! ======================== Oh goodness, watch the UNCUT version on Youtube! ======================== Got a question, challenge or concern you'd like Janet & Jen to tackle on a future episode of On Boys?  Please share in the comments below.