NOBODY LIKES ONIONS

Patrick is back after an extended hiatus while building out the new studio. Bear with the subpar sound on this one while we dial everything back in. Thai Rivera is back and this time he’s guesting on another comedy podcast where he feels he’s been disrespected, ambushed and misrepresented. Watch this insanely cringe interaction that propels all of the weirdness of the Las Vegas comedy scene to new depths. New year! New characters! New arguments! New studio! Let’s see how fucking weird this gets.

Patrick has taken a poll on instagram about Las Vegas comedians, and he’s been getting some strange messages. How deep do the secrets of the Las Vegas comedy scene go? Will we ever know? Are some good guys being accused of being bad guys, and vice versa? Will Matt Markman ever sell enough of his CD’s to stop posting photoshopped promos for it? We don’t answer many of these questions, but we have fun tiredly speculating endlessly. Stay tuned for 2021. New year. New studio. New secrets.

Patrick gets an email that starts his entire day down a trail of podcasting history. Keith and the Girl, one of the first podcasts when we started back in 2005, is back at it with their old tricks. These two dopey ex-clowns never cease to amaze us with their inability to master podcasting, from the aesthetics to the technical, despite having literally written a book about it. Five years ago they raised over $30K for a Flash chat room, and now they want more money to hide under a bunk bed and do podcasts from their roach-infested homes. Come with us on a sad journey down one of the most wasted podcasting opportunities this great planet has ever witnessed.

Patrick has been troubled lately. Spirits. Ghouls. Ghosts. Geists. Goblins. A boy has been walking around Patrick’s house, taunting him with hisses in the night and scurrying from room to room. We dive in to Google and find out it could be a boy named David. We check in on Crazy Joe, because it’s been so long since we met a mad man. Patrick bitches about updates with his house. Ellen Page is now Elliott Page, because that’s just what 2020 needed to put a button on it. We are all doomed. Say your prayers. Dear David walks amongst us.

Patrick gathers all the people from around the internet who want to escape from their families in to one chat room to guilt eat and cry. Patrick is getting close to signing on his new house, and has stories about HOAs for days, but the chat doesn’t seem impressed. Patrick drinking always ends up leading to some really dark ideas. Does anyone wanna do some cool YouTube channel stuff as a prank? We talk Thanksgiving food and what not to eat this holiday season. Should Patrick grow a man bun? Steve Curran makes an appearance to troll Patrick in to letting him call in to the show. Moody piles on like the follower he is. Dave Chappelle feels bad about not making money. Steve Curran is curating White Claws and cheese while trying to avoid catching COVID from his cousin.

Patrick is sick once again and is paranoid about the coronavirus again. The studio is about to be wrecked as Patrick’s landlord finally agreed to install some auxiliary air conditioners, which is great for the winter chills. He’s also waiting for the last hurdle of his home-buying adventure by trying to get some documents from the Homeowner’s Association. All the old cables and equipment must go! We’re going to be all powered by Unifi now. Patrick has a real beef with Hubble contact lenses, which he’s convinced are sucking up moisture and squeezing the living fuck out of his eyeballs. Could it be that he does have COVID? Could it be allergies? Or is it all Hubble’s fault because of their blood lenses.

It’s Patrick’s birthday, and although he appreciates the love and gifts from those who have gathered. Enough is enough. Some people don’t understand what gifts are good, and what gifts are chores. Amazon gift cards or cash, please. None of this other feel-good horseshit. Patrick ordered a new iPhone 12 Pro that should be delivered today, but UPS is fucking it up royally. Patrick has to sprint off midshow to intercept the package at a wrong address. When he returns, he recaps his birthday, including a genealogy exam, his new phone, and a peanut butter ice cream cake. Roy calls in to talk politics, and he is more woke than ever.

Patrick is balls deep in the house buying process, and the stress is beginning to take it’s toll. He’s intimidated by the prospect of taking on the project of installing a pool in his back yard, and he feels pressured by Big Pool. Costco has a lot to answer for when it comes to how he was treated recently at the optical center. Along with being ignored at the service counter, he’s sick of being stalked like a D-level celebrity by cashiers. Patrick is disappointed in the new MacBook announcement. Everyone seems to be over the coronavirus now. There’s even some Cucker Tarlson jokes in this one. We check in on the state of the eyeglass industry. Don’t trust any industry that can take giant percentage discounts off their products. Somehow we end up on politics again and Patrick is getting to be over all of it.

Patrick straps in for a long day and night of uncertainty and civil unrest. Armed only with weed and a limited knowledge of how the election process works on the whole, and joined by a band of savagely uninformed voters, Patrick tries to make the most of the situation at hand. Part 1 of 3 of this series sets up the evening, reviews some of the highlights and nightmares of elections past, and elicits predictions from Patrick as well as fans in the chat room. We switch around to some of the liberal media fake news big tech cut companies and see what they’re covering. You can’t ignore the salty air tonight. Get SIX MORE HOURS of Election Night 2020 coverage in the Overdose!

Welcome to morning hot talk with the bow boys. Patrick welcomes you to Gum Club and talks about how all the gum comes from like two companies, collectively known as Big Gum. Gum Club is sponsored by Brandie’s Bows and Cheryl’s Barrels. These shows were recorded before the election, so the amount of foreplay in the air between two old men is salty and thick. Patrick fights with chat members with a bow in his hair, rails on people who think they know what’s going on, and expresses displeasure with Trump and his SCOTUS hypocrisy. No one hates gays so knock it off. We explore Jack in the Box’s full menu and it’s salty and thick as well. No one is doing well, everything is fucked, and everyone is a wrong liar.

Patrick is kicking off his day with coffee and an apology to Breonna Taylor. Patrick’s latest foray in to trying to buy a house has failed again due to a poor inspection that revealed a million problems. He quickly recovers though, by making another offer on a new house, but not without it’s compromises. He’s decided to go full basic bitch, purchases a magazine-like home stamped out in a planned community, and the worst part is there is no pool. But Patrick has the solution – he will just build a pool in the small back yard himself. We go over whether or not Rudy Giuliani is a creep in the new Borat movie. There’s two sizes of toilets, Patrick has some of Landry’s old election yard signs, and we remember Polar Pops. There’s too much drama in Las Vegas and Patrick is on the brink of breaking.

Patrick is back from doing shows on the road and is back to hunting for a house. It’s not been going well, but he has an offer in on a new place that is pretty sweet, but it’s missing that sweet natural gas he craves. Patrick is traumatized by the left and baffled by the right, and he doesn’t even know what’s real anymore. He is officially undecided for the upcoming presidential election, and the media spin isn’t making the decision any easier. We stumble over the details of the Breonna Taylor shooting, and probably get it all wrong. What even is happening anymore? Anyway don’t forget to register to vote or whatever.

Patrick sits down with everyones favorite wannabe city councilperson/comedian/activist/grumpy old man, Landry Miller. Landry was good enough to put aside his general disdain for people long enough to sit down with Patrick to talk about doing comedy in pandemic times, this recent alcoholism. Patrick is starting to really hate everyone’s inability to tolerate people with different opinions. Landry has one of the ugliest cars in history. Patrick has some trauma from early camp experiences, including fat camp and Christian camp. Landry tells us about the time he got free donuts from a pay-it-forward chain. Some guy has proven that time travel is theoretically possible. Patrick and Landry both really hate small talk. Someone please pay Landry’s Amazon Web Services bill so he stops getting emails.

Patrick has just finished up a week of work in Tulsa and sits down with comedian Scott Schaffer to bitch about these kids today. Progressing in to straight-up "get off my lawn" territory, the two discuss the state of comedy and the world by basically bitching about people who can't stop bitching. Anyone who posts on social media might be absolutely mentally ill, and blocking people is most definitely a sign of narcissistic dementia. This content is for OVERDOSE MEMBERS only. Visit the site and login or register to access this content.

Patrick is joined by Roy Johnson in an on-location show from Tulsa, Oklahoma after finishing a week of shows. Patrick hasn’t been on stage in over six months, and is also paralyzed by a crippling fear of COVID-19. Roy recaps the weekend and pontificates to the dismay of the chat room while Patrick takes a very important phone call. Patrick has been house shopping, and the inspector chose now to call and tell him that the house is basically a wreck, and he should run for the hills. It’s a setback, but that’s how the world works these days. Roy and Patrick talk about ways to fix the economy and how the government is breaking it more by handing out dollars. Patrick is bitter about comedians being basic. Roy recounts being assaulted in a bar by an employee which he is hoping leads to a big settlement.