#20: Dr. Stephen Snyder - Why Social Media is Making Sex Obsolete

Summary: Social Media is making sex obsolete.<br><br>Dr. Stephen Snyder shares a shocking statistic that reveals the drop in the sexual interaction between people. He unpacks his very interesting theory on why this is. In this episode, you will hear about why people have sex and the influence of social media and technology on their motivation to engage sexually.<br><br>He talks about ‘Healthy Narcissism” as children and its return during sex, both of which he describes as normal. Listen in to hear him connect the dots between what social media offers and celebrity narcissism- “What we used to get from sex, we now get it from lots of places.” When describing how we interact with devices, he refers to an Infantile Narcissistic State that wants everything but gives nothing.<br><br>How long should sex last?<br><br>Listen in to find out what Dr. Snyder considers the appropriate length for sexual engagement. He touches on porn and its influence on what people perceive as perfect. Again, technology affects what we come to expect.<br><br>Sex: Technique versus Feelings<br><br>Dr. Snyder compares the variety of advice available to couples about technique and technical know-how as opposed to psychological signs. He shares the signs of arousal (this is not actually what you think it is!!). This candid list is something you won’t want to miss out on as it brings much clarity to what we experience.<br><br>Dr. Snyder unwraps the effect of sex on your mental faculties, returning to an infantile state and validation. Tune in to hear his advice for experiencing the most out of arousal to validate and connect us in relationships.<br><br>How does good communication ruin great sex?<br><br>We move on to even more unusual beliefs with Dr. Snyder. Join in to hear his shocking view on what communication can do to your relationship and encounter his playful analogies around this. He shares his experiences about couples he consults and makes sense of why he believes communication curbs the passion in relationships.<br>Is it ok to be Selfish?<br><br>Join in to find out about the role selfishness plays in relationships and sex. We cover orgasms and who is responsible for them despite what is commonly believed. Dr. Snyder draws parallels between childlike selfishness and its connection with sex. Very interesting to hear!<br><br>But I’m not in the mood<br><br>Dr. Snyder covers a method called the Two- Step. He discusses the secret of this method as the ‘experiencing mode.’ While every couple does things a little differently together, Dr. Snyder says it should move naturally to the second step. We share a playground analogy that opens up our views about what is expected and not expected for connecting with your partner.<br>Men and women experience things differently.<br><br>In this episode, Dr. Snyder visits the evolution of men’s understanding of women. He shares his insights on how men have lost their primal instincts in an attempt to better understand women and what the impact of this is in relationships today. He shares his advice on embracing your desires.<br><br>When Dr. Snyder assesses women today, he focuses on women not understanding that men want happy partners. He presents men’s fears about having unhappy partners and the fear of disappointment. In his assessment, he draws on the male experience with a mother and the themes carried from that into adult relationships.<br><br>About our guest<br><br>Stephen Snyder, M.D. is Associate Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at the Icahn School of Medicine and an AASECT-certified sex therapist in full-time private practice in New York City.<br><br>He is Chairman of the Consumer Book Award Committee of the Society for Sex Therapy and Research (SSTAR), as well as one of America’s most trusted authorities on sex and relationships.<br><br>Dr. Snyder’s articles about eros in the modern world have gained over a million views online. He is a...