Table Reads show

Table Reads

Summary: Shawn, Josh and Jeff work tirelessly to bring to life the screenplays that Hollywood tried to keep from you! Movies that were never made, but should have been! Movies that were never made and for good reason! Movies that definitely should NOT have been made, but you kind of wish you could see them anyway! These brave scriptonauts subject themselves to scripts good and bad (mostly bad), acting them out and editorializing for your entertainment!

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 81 - Gladiator 2, Part 1 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 4243

"Gladiator 2," you may ask? -- Yes, you read that right."Didn't the titular Gladiator die," you may ask? -- Oh, yes."Who wrote this," you may ask? -- Nick Cave."The musician," you would be remiss not to ask? -- The very same."I loved 'Red Right Hand!' but does that qualify him to write the sequel to a Best Picture-winning film," you may ask? -- No, it clearly fucking does NOT.That's right; Shawn, Joshua and guest host Jeff are reading the bonkers Gladiator sequel that no one wanted! It's a fun look at what happens when people don't stay in their damn lane! Give it a listen and, if you haven't already, SUBSCRIBE!

 80 - Preacher, Part 4 (Finale) | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 4898

It's the conclusion of John August's Preacher script! We got through this in a brisk four episodes because, honestly, it was fucking GREAT! A really solid script deserving of the source material that should have made it to the big screen (though, perhaps not with DJ Caruso at the helm... that could still have ruined it). It's not often that we get a chance to read something good on this show, so consider this a special treat and give it a listen. Also, don't forget to like and subscribe!

 79 - Preacher, Part 3 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 3731

It's the third installment of John August's 2010 Preacher script, and we've got an Irish Vampire road tripping with a deformed youth, astral projection at a serial killer convention, Jesse and Tulip taken hostage, and something unpleasant going through Tulip's mind. The wild ride continues apace, as we continue to have NO COMPLAINTS with this script! Do you even understand how rare that is? [NOTE: if the answer is no, you really need to go back and listen to old episodes.]

 78 - Preacher, Part 2 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 3984

John August's Preacher script moves into full swing as the titular preacher, Jesse Custer, takes possession of the entity known as Genesis, he and Tulip are reunited, we're introduced to Cassidy and Arseface, and the Saint of Killers comes into play. It's an action-packed episode that continues to BLOW OUR MINDS with how good it is! Give it a listen, you will not be disappointed!

 77 - Preacher, Part 1 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 3873

While Kelly is sadly indisposed, Shawn and Joshua are joined by Jeff Lewis to read a genuinely good Preacher script written by John August.Gone is the normal snark and derision, as the gang just thoroughly enjoys an engaging and well-written script. So, our apologies. For real though, guys... this script is SO GOOD. You're going to enjoy this.

 76 - Shazam, Part 6 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 3946

The FINALE of Shazam!! It’s been quite the journey to get here, but it’s worth it for what must be the single most bizarre ending scenes of any superhero script ever. Or, as this script would put it: THE MOST UNCOMFORTABLE SUPERHERO FINALE YOU EVER SAW. Join the gang as they wrap up their reading of this utterly strange take on the Character that Zachary Levi ended up bringing life to!

 Ep 75 - Shazam, Part 5 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 4091

Captain Marvel has his first super-powered smackdown. Billy Batson is revealed as the vulnerable alter-ego of Captain America through a combination of gigantic leaps of logic and miracle-level computer software (that comes pre-installed).Sivana pulls off the single most convoluted kidnapping in the history of film. And I wish that were hyperbole.Join us for the penultimate episode of William Goldman’s SHAZAM!

 74 - Shazam, Part 4 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 4904

Sivana makes Magnificus a super-powered adversary to Captain Marvel!This movie says that ‘You’ll Believe a Girl Can Fall!’ — for, like 18 pages!We see just how much Captain Marvel sucks. Literally.Sivana kidnaps some billionaires, including Orphanage magnate Augustus Gates, leading CM to his first true act of Super-heroism, which is a nice change of pace from using the power of the gods to cheat on a test. Which is a thing that also happens.What I’m saying is that William Goldman was not someone who you would want to have super powers. That guy’s moral compass is permanently pointing to “I’MMA GET MINE”All this and more, in part 4 of William Goldman’s SHAZAM!

 73 - Shazam, Part 3 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 4367

The resurrection of evil incarnate! The power of the gods used to hustle at chess and play the MOST TEDIOUS game of baseball in film history! And if you think that Billy’ isn’t going to a “mature” movie on his first day with an adult body, YOU ARE MISTAKEN. But don’t worry... there are some actual super-heroics. With juggling. Y’know, writing a synopsis like this really does a great job of illustrating how little thought must have gone into this script.But, hey, the gang take a brief break from a particularly painful part of the script to discuss how the game of Quiddich could be improved. So there’s that...

 72 - Shazam, Part 2 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 4609

It's part 2 of Shazam, so you know what that means! Captain Marvel [not the Brie Larson character -ed.] makes his big debut, allowing William Goldman to explore the sexual desires of a 15 year old girl for a man described as being 25! Ew!Aside from the super inappropriate sexual tension, Jenny helps Billy get a grip on his new situation as Earth's Mightiest Mortal while elsewhere, we meet the children of Sivana, who have the Rowlingest names you ever heard! The transport their father's remains home in a rather unconventional way. But don't worry! Before the end of the episode, we get STILL MORE incredibly discomforting sexualization of a 15-year-old girl! Gah!It's like Lolita, if Nabokov thought her behavior was totally normal.

 71 - Shazam, Part 1 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 5028

This is the first episode of the ALL NEW TABLE READS!With this episode, we welcome back Kelly Leviay as a full-time co-host and introduce Joshua Baker as a second full-time co-host in addition to show creator Shawn McBee, making Table Reads a 3 person podcast! For the first foray of the new lineup, we’re reading our first script authored by an Academy Award winner: Shazam, by the legendary William Goldman! Get a listen at what might have been if the new film starring Zachary Levi had been made about 10 years earlier (probably without Zachary Levi). Guys, it’s pretty weird.

 70 - Termite Terrace, Part 4 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 4258

It's the Looney conclusion of Termite Terrace! You'll find out what this has all been building to! Spoiler: think of the most groundbreaking and/or popular and/or revered cartoon character to come out of the Warner Bros animation department... IT'S NOT THAT ONE. No, this film builds up to... nothing you would expect to be the culmination of the story of the creation of the Looney Tunes. It's like if a Biopic were made about Stephen King, where the big finishing note was a shot of the manuscript for Rose Madder. Next Week:Table Reads will return with William Goldman's SHAZAM! -- As well as an all-new Table Reads lineup! It's a new chapter for Table Reads and we think you're gonna love it!

 69 - Termite Terrace, Part 3 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 4599

Pete deals with the fallout from taking a movie starlet to bone-town, which involves the conspicuously-introduced Dot to cool to him... but not so much that they don't still get married before this episode is over. And if you feel like that's a spoiler, it's only because you don't understand how little importance this event seems to hold for anyone involved, including the writer. Far more important seems to be Pete getting his own unit with Landy (who is up to something shady), a labor union forming in Hollywood, and some incremental development of a rabbit character at the studio.

 68 - Termite Terrace, Part 2 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 3929

Our young hero Pete gets an opportunity to sneak a peek at a big-time actress for a cartoon, and ends up meeting a dame in the process. Yeah, that’s right, a dame... this IS the 1930s we’re talking about. The cartoon leads to some success and something altogether unexpected (and not completely believable) Join Shawn and Trevor as they continue to be entirely unimpressed by the professional attempt at telling a story they've found interesting all their lives!

 Ep 67 - Termite Terrace, Part 1 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 4131

Table Reads co-founder and YouTube's own Looney Tunes Critic is back on Table Reads for the most appropriate script ever: Termite Terrace, the failed Joe Dante project that would have told the interesting tale of the birth of the Looney Tunes in probably the least interesting way imaginable! In part one, you will meet all the pseudonymous creators of your favorite cartoons--and I do mean ALL, right down to the guy who delivers memos--while also learning IN SUCH DETAIL how an animated cartoon is made! It's like reading the script to an instructional video from the 40s!It's a good thing Shawn and Trevor are here to put this script in it's place, while also doing a better job than the script at telling the real origins of the Looney Tunes, as animation history is a passion of theirs going back decades.


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