The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill
Summary: This podcast features Mr. Neill of oldmanneill.com fame telling his trademark anticlimactic stories. New episodes feature 5 rambling stories. Following each story is a scratchy 78 RPM record. Who is singing/playing on these records? A hot mix of obscure/dead people. The 41-year-old podcaster has mad generation-x street cred. After 10 years of teaching high school Math in Chicago, Mr. Neill has spent the last 6 years in Pittsburgh “working” as a stay-at-home dad. While his kids are at school, Mr. Neill tears apart and rebuilds his fancy house. In Pittsburgh fancy houses cost next to nothing.
Despite his sharp looking sports coat, a long haired Mr. Neill is accused of stealing his dying boss’ glasses. It’s the sort of thing a man who pees in the snow would do. Meanwhile a blind sub has no idea that his school has rats. Stories: Dr. Sharon Rae Bender thinks Mr. Neill peed in […] The post Podcast #17 stories 60-66 appeared first on The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill.
Mr. Neill has an epiphany at 2pm while rooting against his hometown baseball team. In a state of feverish delirium, he accidentally lands a dream job. He knows he has landed the job because he finds $10 on the ground. Stories: 10 months of theological studies Aimless musings after a week in bed The dream […] The post Podcast #16 stories 57-59 appeared first on The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill.
A voice from heaven tells Carol to stop beating her kids. A heavenly fireball ends the party. Mr. Neill is shunned after insulting a man’s meat and his beer while a runaway trunk cancels a sale. Stories: Carol, stop beating your kids A fireball breaks up a party A man’s beer and his meat are […] The post Podcast #15 stories 53-56 appeared first on The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill.
D.O.G. hopes to shed his vegetarian ways. Pete wants to free the weed, perhaps in celebration of Gina’s birthday. Meanwhile, the hacky sack boss mops up the spilled beer of a house shopper. Stories: A potential home buyer takes a tumble Become popular by playing hacky sack A dog named D.O.G. Free the weed 78′s: […] The post Podcast #14 stories 49-52 appeared first on The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill.
Mr. Neill visits four restaurants. A waitress confounds him while another documents him. A drastic career change is announced. In a shocking twist, Mrs. Neill settles for pork. Stories: A Dory-like waitress (Argentine) Dad, I want to rap (Burmese) A flip phone videographer (Sri Lankan) But this is pork (Chinese) Intermission music by Zachary Neill The post Podcast #13 stories 45-48 appeared first on The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill.
A pothead claims that Mr. Neill is housing Spongebob’s DNA. What would Hank do? Probably shoot the pothead. What would Mr. Neill do if he had continued his video game addiction? Probably shoot the pothead. Stories: Spongebob grew up in my house Hank wants to sing hymns and shoot guns The perils of video game […] The post Podcast #12 stories 42-44 appeared first on The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill.
Mr. Neill receives sage advice from both sides of the law. Yet questions remain. Can a mansion have just one bedroom? What if the lawn you wanted was no lawn at all? And what if having no lawn took you off the grid? Stories: The mansion at 3030 Elroy St. The lawn he wants is […] The post Podcast #11 stories 39-41 appeared first on The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill.
A demented radio doctor retards Mr. Neill’s academic development. Evidence of his stunted growth quickly manifest in a not-so scientific “cocolate” chip cookie experiment. Stories: Tell us more about the texture of popcorn A Weird Al singalong Churro bites a longboarder down in Buenos Aires 78’s Cliff Carlisle – It takes the old hen to […] The post Podcast #10 stories 36-38 appeared first on The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill.
Zealots of the Star Wars religion made no attempt to help, or to even look in the direction of Mr. Neill. Three baby mouses, however, had no trouble looooking at Mr. Neill. Stories: They were Star Wars, but Mr. Neill was not Star Wars Surfing on David M Mr. Neill, there are three baby mouses, […] The post Podcast #9 stories 33-35 appeared first on The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill.
They’re quiet and virtually invisible, but don’t be fooled by the Parisian child. One can witness the devilry of these monsters at any Parisian park. Trust Mr. Neill on this. He no longer lies. Stories: Parisian children unleashed – part I Parisian children unleashed – part II Too old to lie 78’s Carolina Twins – […] The post Podcast #8 stories 30-32 appeared first on The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill.
What could be more ridiculous than letting random strangers sleep in your guestroom? How about repeating the same two lines for TWENTY-FIVE YEARS, never once drawing a laugh. Stories: Spinning records with Asia Two good lines Taking hospitality Giving hospitality Unless March 28 was “reverse racism day”, Lauren D was wrong 78’s: Allen Brothers – […] The post Podcast #7 stories 26-29 appeared first on The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill.
Three automobile accidents in one day? Really Mr. Neill? No wonder you were forced to ride bus 60 with a pickle rolling around on the floor. Stories: Pounding on a table will get you hired Breakfast with the entertainment industry Three accidents in one day Strange things are afoot at Tilden High School A rolling […] The post Podcast #6 stories 21-25 appeared first on The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill.
The USS Neill bumbles ahead, leaving chaos and head-shaking in its wake. In this episode, several simple tasks go horribly wrong. Stories: Camp counseling 1st memories Mr. Neill delivers money in his underwear The hottest car ever Parking 78’s: Wingy Manone – Swingin at the hickory house Sons of the Pioneers – Lie low little […] The post Podcast #5 stories 16-20 appeared first on The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill.
Although Mr. Neill and P. Diddy were born hours apart, their lives have traced vastly differing trajectories. This episode dares to compare these differences. Stories: Anthony Nuzzo is alive The right woman shouldn’t make you feel like a loser Don’t compare yourself to Diddy Filling in the blanks…strange things are afoot at the Korean restaurant […] The post Podcast #4 stories 11-15 appeared first on The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill.
Mr. Neill digs out his recording equipment and returns to form. This episode features a rare moment in which Mr. Neill sings and plays his guitar. Stories: Dr. Pete Asia and her guitar A camp with Mr. Neill What are you kids trying to pull 78’s: Wingy Manone – Getting some fun out of life […] The post Podcast #3 stories 7-10 appeared first on The 500 Stories of Mr. Neill.