Down to a sunless sea: memories of my dad show

Down to a sunless sea: memories of my dad

Summary: This podcast is about my dad, and me, and our relationship. It's also about death, old age, care, love, history, change, mental health, science, medicine, art, dementia and friendship. It brings together memoir, clips from over 10 years of recordings of my father, sound design, and interviews with experts. It takes you on a journey down to a sunless sea. This podcast includes content funded by the British Podcast Awards Fund and the Wellcome Trust.

Podcasts:

 Legacy | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:11:22

Content notes: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues, sex, assisted dying, war  This episode is the last episode of the first (and possibly last) season of this show, and it's about legacy. I’m glad I made this show. That it hasn’t just remained an imagined show. It’s been a tough journey at times, but it’s one I’m so glad I’ve made. Thanks for travelling on it with me.

 The Box and the Jar | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 46:44

Content note: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues, grief, suicide, terminal illness, abuse, bereavement In the final full episode of the podcast using content funded by the British Podcast Awards and the Wellcome Trust I talk to counselor and psychotherapist Karen Pollock MBACP about grief. This is an episode about thinking about bereavement, therapeutic approaches to change and loss, how the systems and attitudes around us effect the ways we deal with difficult things, and so much more.

 Waves | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 38:08

Content note: death, dementia, mental health issues, euthanasia/suicide But no matter what he forgets, it can’t take away the love we have shared, that existed, and will always have existed, even when he has forgotten it; even when he is no longer alive to remember it; even when I have forgotten it; even when I am no longer alive to remember it. This episode is about movement, memory, change, time, distance, tears, connection, therapy, sadness, love, grief and everything else that can come in waves

 Death is not something that can be kept at a distance | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 45:20

General content note for the series: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues, bereavement, pain, terminal illness and the caste system In the seventh full episode of the podcast using content funded by the British Podcast Awards and the Wellcome Trust I talk to Khyati Tripathi about studying death. This is an episode about understanding and navigating mortality and creating spaces where we can talk about difficult and taboo topics.

 André Gorz Tweet | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 51:05

Content note: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues, euthanasia/suicide This episode is about belief, hope and progress. It considers technological change, generational change, spiritual change and political change. Artwork by my brother Tony Pickering: http://www.pick-art.co.uk/

 New answers to old questions | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 51:21

Content note: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues, operations, medical procedures, assisted dying, euthanasia In the sixth full episode of the podcast using content funded by the British Podcast Awards and the Wellcome Trust I talk to sociologist Dr Gill Haddow about embodiment, replaceable hearts, everyday cyborgs, humanimals and unhealth. This is an episode about possible futures and how we feel about our bodies. Artwork by my brother Tony Pickering: http://www.pick-art.co.uk/

 Hearts Breaking | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 48:21

Content note for the series: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues,: war, medical operations, suicidal ideation I’m still pretty terrified of my dad stopping existing. He has been such a part of my life that it feels like a world without him in it is impossible. But ever since I was a child, I have been imagining that world. This episode is about confronting death and confronting love. It includes the story of my dad's war and of his heart attack and quadruple heart bypass.

 Drink Sangria in the park | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 49:43

General content note for the series: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues Extra content note: PTSD, dependency/addiction, rape (touched on lightly, no descriptions) In the fifth full episode of the podcast using content funded by the British Podcast Awards and the Wellcome Trust I talk to psychologist and epidemiologist Dr Suzy Gage from the podcast Say Why to Drugs about researching recreational drug use and mental health.

 Friendship Part 2 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 47:09

General content note for the series: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues This episode is about creating things: imaginary worlds, homes and friendship. It's also about walls: drawing on walls, putting up boundaries, and pulling down the walls inside your mind and heart. Artwork by my brother Tony Pickering: http://www.pick-art.co.uk/

 We're not in uncharted territory | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:29:37

Content note: Suicide, self harm, death, dementia, old age, mental health issues, bereavement, war, antisemitism, the Nazis, COVID19 In the fourth full episode of the podcast using content funded by the British Podcast Awards and the Wellcome Trust I talk to health psychologist Professor Rory O'Connor about researching suicidal behaviour. And to historian Professor Julie Gottlieb about researching suicide increases in times of crisis, specifically during the "War of Nerves" (1938-1939).

 Chivalry | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 44:48

General content note for the series: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues When I made a show about my relationship with masculinity, I talked a lot about my mum and my stepdad, but my dad hardly featured at all. When he did, he was a positive presence and represented an alternative version of masculinity. When you’re trying to condense your history into an hour-long show, you have to leave some bits out. This episode is about masculinity, privilege and performance.

 Friendship Part 1 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 36:36

General content note for the series: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues It’s important to keep in mind that the story of my relationship with my dad is only one part of his life. It’s only one of the ways he has been a father: the context of my childhood has been very different from the context of my siblings’ childhoods. While he was retired for most of my life, for the rest of my siblings, he was someone who went out to work.  This episode is about friendship, parenting, love and

  I don't want to die, but I'm dying | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:28:41

Content note: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues, bereavement, suicide, disability, abortion, terminal illness In the third full episode of the podcast using content funded by the British Podcast Awards and the Wellcome Trust I talk to three doctors with different perspectives and experiences that inform their opinions around assisted dying and euthanasia, something my dad has long advocated for and wishes was available to him.

 Desire Paths | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 40:09

Memories are like desire paths: when you first walk down them, they are overgrown and full of details. The more you walk them, the more eroded they become; they are smoothed out and set. You get to what you remember more quickly, but what you remember has become something else. You no longer have to look for landmarks because there is a path for you to walk. This episode is about time memory, childhood, dementia and Citizen Kane.

 Old people are people | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 01:15:31

General content note for the series: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues In the second full episode of the podcast using content funded by the British Podcast Awards and the Wellcome Trust I talk to Dr Jonathan Huntley about the work he is doing looking into awareness in people living with advanced dementia. And to Dr Daniel Davis about the work he is doing looking at how delirium and dementia impact society and health at a population level. 

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