Table Reads

Have you been listening to this just because you want to hear us talk about big blue dick? You sick pervert. YOUR WISH IS GRANTED! This is the episode where we’re introduced to a not-flashback Dr. Manhattan, in all his naked glory! And, look, we’re about to tell you more about the episode, but be honest: you’re already in. This is all you wanted. There’s also some great unhinged Rorschach action, as he decided to bust heads, literally at random, in the hopes someone has info about the Comedian’s murder. But back to the blue dick… and the infamous threesome scene! Yeah, THAT’S IN THE EPISODE, TOO! So. Many. Blue. DICKS!!Are you still reading this? Hit play already, you’re not fooling anyone!Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereadsAlso: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned. Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereads

It’s 1989. Alan Moore’s Watchmen is a commercial and critical success. Batmania is taking the nation by storm, ushering in a golden age for superhero movies. So there’s only one thing to do: Hire the Batman guy to write a script for Watchmen… and hire Terry Gilliam to direct!Does all of that sound too good to be true? Well, if you’ve paid any attention to what this podcast is about, then, yeah, it should. That’s kinda what we’re about here. This first part of Sam Hamm’s Watchmen script gives us a glimpse at the downfall of the superhero team known as “the Watchmen.” Yes, we know that they’re never actually called that in the comics. TELL SAM HAMM, NOT US. Because they are explicitly referred to by this name. It’s a whole, weird opening sequence set at the Statue of Liberty, complete with Dr. Manhattan, an oddly glib Rorschach, and one exploding superhero. Who? Well, hit play and find out! This week's cover photo is courtesy of Michael Stoler... and make sure you check out his site: http://www.stoler.info -- so many projects there that you absolutely MUST SEE!Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereadsAlso: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned. Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereads

We have reached the end of our Batventure! While it’s tempting to tell you that this is the most bananas conclusion ever, the truth is that this final installment of the script sort of settles down. It’s still… weird… but it never again reached the insane heights of the previous couple episodes. Why on Earth would we be so honest? Because we respect you, we know you’ll listen because you love the show and, most importantly, it doesn’t matter… after 5 episodes, you KNOW you need to know how it ends! Will Robin be introduced? Will the Joker be teased? Does Batman carry a picture ID? You’ll have to listen to find out!Give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereadsAlso: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned. Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereadsIf you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/screenplay-archaeology-episode-4-batman-year-one/

Witness the full, uncompromising power of the BAT-MAN, as he takes on the entirety of the GCPD, while hobos burn around him, like the most demented level of some rejected Arkham Asylum game! This episode is almost wall-to-wall action of the most bananas-insane variety we've experienced yet, and that includes the cryogenic warg escape from the Lord of the Rings script!Seriously, this craziness has to be heard to be believed. This is really the crescendo of the script, where we reach the apex of just how goddamn NUTS this script can get!Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereadsAlso: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned. Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereadsIf you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/screenplay-archaeology-episode-4-batman-year-one/

Having worked his way all the way to Gotham’s highest-ranking criminal, Bat-Man is shocked to discover that there is a deep conspiracy, and the real criminals are someone you’d never suspect! Unless you’ve ready any of the heavy-handed and childish foreshadowing all throughout the script. What follows is some intensely-psychotic dead-dad letter-writing, followed by some skulking in some bushes and an encounter with the Catwo—uh, whore (sigh), Selina.Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereadsAlso: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned. Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereadsIf you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/screenplay-archaeology-episode-4-batman-year-one/

With the news somehow mistaking the TW left in criminal’s face’s by Bruces Signet Ring for a Bat, the decidedly un-bat-like vigilante is dubbed The Bat-Man! Donning his familiar…um…catcher’s mask… Bruce finally becomes the dark avenger of the night we’ve been waiting for. Sort of. Ish.He fights his way up the criminal ladder, seeking out the “general” of crime…Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereadsAlso: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned. Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereadsIf you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/screenplay-archaeology-episode-4-batman-year-one/

Inspired by the televised heroics of Detective Gordon, Bruce the scrapyard worker set off to do battle with crime, by turning himself into a sort of crime honeypot! For the better part of an evening, he fights crime by beating up everyone that tries to mug him… until he bites off more than he can chew! A stunning defeat teaches Bruce that if he is truly going to strike fear into the hearts of criminals, he’s going to need more resources… Namely, the local library! While all this is going on, we get still more examples of the GCPD’s corruption, which seems to be what a 4th grader thinks corruption is… And Jim Gordon is NOT having it!Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereadsAlso: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned. Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereadsIf you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/screenplay-archaeology-episode-4-batman-year-one/

It’s time for Batman’s origin again. So, of course we’re going to go over the well-worn tale of Bruce Wayne being taken in by Sanford and Son and spending 15 years living in a scrapyard directly across the street from where his parents were murdered. Wait, what?We also meet Jim Gordon, the only stand-up cop in Gotham who apparently gets home from work and struggles with whether to blow his brains out. EVERY NIGHT. With his wife IN THE NEXT ROOM. Join us as we experience Frank Miller’s slope from comics great to the hard-boiled, alt-right misogyny machine that he would eventually become. N this case, guided by the vision of extraordinary filmmaker Darren Aronofsky, who was just 15 years early on this concept. Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereadsAlso: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned. Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereadsIf you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/screenplay-archaeology-episode-4-batman-year-one/

It’s the stunning (and overdue) conclusion to John Boorman’s Lord of the Rings! It’s been a thrilling and utterly weird 11 episodes, but we finally reach the conclusion of the greatest saga never filmed!Sam and Frodo reach Mount Doom while war rages at the Black Gate... though that war seems mostly concerned with protecting a Frodo effigy, for some reason. Unlike the Peter Jackson trilogy, which has basically an entire normal-length movie left to go after the good guys win, this one wraps up ALARMINGLY quickly, to the point where your head is left spinning, wondering if there was a time jump you missed!Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereadsAlso: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned. Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereadsIf you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

It’s the conclusion of the Battle of the Pellenor Fields, and Gondor has a new king! You’ll never guess who. Well, you might. After a full episode away from them, we also re-join Sam and Frodo and see what they’re up to… HINT: They’re not currently having an easy time. This is an action-packed episode that sees the conclusion of one major battle and the start of another, with the fate of Middle Earth in the balance! Don’t Miss it!Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereadsAlso: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned. Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereadsIf you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

Who wants some Battle of the Pellenor Fields? I hope it’s you, because that’s what this whole episode is! There’s death, and drama, and a new way to use horses! Do you like giant snakes? We’ve got that, too! Going into part 9 of a script is completely unprecedented for us, but it somehow keeps being fun! Join us and find out what craziness John Boorman would have brought to the great battle at Minas Tirith!Also: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned. Like this podcast? Hate it? Either way, give us a review on your platform of choice! Here's an easy link to help: https://ratethispodcast.com/tablereadsOur episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads Or you can find us anywhere on the internet by going to https://linktr.ee/tablereadsIf you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

Sam and Frodo finally make it to Mordor, and we get the Battle of Minas Tirith! What an action-packed episode! Hell, there’s even a montage! And an army of the dead (guys, Jeff is so happy about that)!We also learn that the defense of Minas Tirith is contingent upon treadmills! No, really, treadmills are VITAL to the survival of Gondor’s capital city… I guess all those soldiers are wearing Lulu Lemon under their armor, as well.Middle-Earth Spin Class aside, things really heat up in this episode, so you’re not gonna want to miss it!In other news: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned. Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

As Frodo and Sam continue with Gollum toward Mordor, we’re reminded that in 1970, Gollum would have just been an actor in makeup. Stop reading this, close your eyes, and just picture an actor dressed as Gollum. In the movie makeup of 1970. Honestly, how great is that??Meanwhile, things continue pretty much in line with what audiences will be familiar with from the books and movies… Merry and Pippin discover Gandalf the white, then travel to Rohan to free King Theoden from the influence of Wormtongue, while Aragorn and crew meet up and ride with Eomir. Also, Shadowfax turns up. Yeah, Shadowfax. Gandalf rides around on Shadowfax. Why do I keep saying Shadowfax? I HAVE NO IDEA. All told, this is a lot more normal than what we’ve come to expect, but we’re pretty confident that it’s going to take a turn soon.In other news: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned. Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

We finally get through the Fellowship of the Ring portion of the story, as the aforementioned Fellowship disbands and goes on their separate quests.Frodo sets off for Mordor on his own, with Sam in tow and Gollum not far behind, while Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas set off to rescue Merry and Pippin from a hoard of orcs…It’s pretty much what you remember from the Peter Jackson movies, but stripped of all that dumb character-building, motivation, and emotional core. BUT WE FINALLY GET GOLLUM! Yay! In other news: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned. Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/

Mourning the loss of Gandalf, the Fellowship has a sleepover with the elves, and Galadriel shows Frodo the full depths of the hospitality of the elves. All. Night. Long. Look, I don’t want to spoil shit, but that’s not a joke. Frodo literally bangs the fuck out of Galadriel. That’s in there. Listen for yourself. Other stuff happens, too, but Frodo and Galadriel going to the bone zone is really the centerpiece. I mean, do you need to know more? In other news: Don’t forget that our patrons can join us on a livestream while we record these episodes roughly a month in advance! They also get early access to posted episodes, AD FREE. Just head on over to www.patreon.com/TableReads and make a pledge! We’ll love you whether you do or not, but becoming a patron is the best way not to get friend-zoned. Our episodes are also available as in-studio videos on YouTube! Just go to YouTube.tablereadspodcast.com and subscribe!As always, you can reach out to us on Twitter @TheTableReads or find us on Facebook at www.Facebook.com/Tablereads If you’d like more information on this script, our friends over at Screenplay Archaeology did a whole episode on it, which you can find here: https://screenplayarchaeology.podbean.com/e/episode-54-lord-of-the-rings/