Sex with Dr. Jess show

Sex with Dr. Jess

Summary: In Sex With Dr. Jess, Dr. Jessica O'Reilly, Toronto-based sexologist, author, and media personality, shares tips on how to enhance your sexual life to improve the quality of your relationships. She interviews guests with questions ranging from how to deal with jealousy to getting down in the bedroom, as well as hosting thought-provoking episodes centered around compatibility and strengthening relationships.

Podcasts:

 Dating, Confidence, & Sex Appeal – A Burlesque Dancer’s Perspective | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 38:07

Burlesque sensation, Pastel Supernova, joins Jess and Brandon to talk about her experiences with dating, love and relationships. She shares insights on building self confidence, loving your body, and overcoming nervousness and performance pressure. Find out more about Burlesque Uni and Love Letters Cabaret here. If you want to know more about Moontower Counseling, click here. See Pastel in action below on Global TV's The Morning Show below! This podcast is brought to you by Desire Resorts.

 Foot Fetishes, Sex Smells, Dating Profiles & Creating Relationship “Distance” | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 40:43

Why do we develop fetishes and how can you talk to your partner about a fetish? How can you discuss spending time apart with a new partner after you’ve moved in together? Jess and Brandon discuss these topics and share their thoughts on sex smells, gift-giving and more. They’re also joined by Samantha Eitel who has an alternative take on dating profiles and “the best gift ever”. This podcast is brought to you by Desire Resorts.

 Foot Fetishes, Sex Smells, Dating Profiles & Creating Relationship “Distance” | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 40:43

Why do we develop fetishes and how can you talk to your partner about a fetish? How can you discuss spending time apart with a new partner after you’ve moved in together? Jess and Brandon discuss these topics and share their thoughts on sex smells, gift-giving and more. They’re also joined by Samantha Eitel who has an alternative take on dating profiles and “the best gift ever”. This podcast is brought to you by Desire Resorts.  

 Emotional (Un)availability: How to Get Your Partner to Open Up | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 49:05

Jess and Brandon discuss what emotional unavailability might look like and they challenge the “fix-it” mentality. They share specific strategies for overcoming emotional unavailability including language and approaches to support your partner. They discuss the five languages of love, simple questions to make daily interactions more emotionally open, and emotional compatibility. **Please find a rough transcript of this podcast below** Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess Podcast brought to you by Desire Resorts and Cruises. I’m Brandon Ware. And I’m Jess O’Reilly, your friendly neighborhood sexologist. Today we’re going to talk about emotional unavailability, because a number of folks have been referencing this topic on Instagram and I posted about it last week. Emotional Unavailability isn’t a formal diagnosis, so it’s one of those terms that tends to be tossed around rather flippantly without a universal definition. Some of us are emotionally unavailable by choice and others don’t even realize that we're putting up a wall. Emotional availability often refers to the ability to talk openly about your feelings and this is a skill as opposed to a state of being. This means that emotional availability can be cultivated with effort and need not be a universal relationship deal breaker. Some signs of being currently emotional unavailable include: They avoid intimate conversations or withdraw when you bring up difficult topics. This is a good example of the fact that emotional unavailability is not a matter of character, but of skill, experience and comfort level. We’ve all avoided intimate and difficult conversations at some point in time, so you can understand why your partner might utilize avoidance behaviours. They may be trying to avoid conflict or tension. They might be distracted or stressed out by other issues in their life and simply don’t have the emotional bandwidth to open up at this time. Or they might simply not have the communication tools/skills to speak openly about intense topics. The good news, of course, is that circumstances change (you can help to put them at ease) and with practice, they can develop the skills to communicate more effectively. It’s important to note that just because you believe you’re more emotionally available, does not in fact make it so. Your perception of your own skills in biased and you can’t expect them to communicate in the same way you do; they may have a different communication style and you’ll be better off finding middle ground as opposed to expecting them to get on board with your expectations. They refuse to express vulnerability. Allowing yourself to be vulnerable requires trust, so emotional availability can increase over time as you get to know and trust one another. If you feel your partner is not opening up, I’d avoid labels like emotionally unavailable and the associated accusations altogether. You’ll find that you’re more likely to get a positive response and a willingness to consider behavioural change if you talk about how you feel as opposed to what your partner is doing wrong. For example, you might be frustrated by the fact that your partner won’t talk about sensitive and personal topics. Related to this frustration, however, may be a sense of insecurity, as you might expect someone who loves you to trust you with their most vulnerable feelings. Talk about this insecurity and what behaviours (e.g. opening up more about the past) might hep to assuage your fears as opposed to accusing your partner of being emotionally unavailable. Opening up about your own emotions including your vulnerabilities (e.g. insecurity) may foster a safe environment that encourages your partner to do the same. They cut people off without working on relationships. Not all relationships (including friendships) are intended to last forever,

 Help! I Can’t Orgasm With My Partner | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 36:19

Jess and Brandon respond to a listener who can orgasm on her own, but not with her partner. They share tips, insights, personal stories as well as practical mindfulness strategies you can try tonight. Please find a rough transcript of this podcast below... Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess Podcast. We’re going to talk about orgasms today. We have a question from a listener. “I have been having trouble orgasming with a partner, but by myself, it’s extremely easy. I have tried to add sex toys when I’m with my partner (which is the usual way I orgasm on my own), but that didn’t even work. He feels insecure since he can’t make me orgasm and I’m embarrassed.” First - you have nothing to be embarrassed about. Your orgasm is for you. It’s not about your partner — unless you’re playing with that fantasy specifically — often in a kinky way. You might allow your partner to take control of your orgasm. One example might involve orgasm denial. It can be — with consent. Orgasm denial is often practiced as BDSM and it involves maintaining arousal without allow orgasm to follow. You might bring your partner to the brink and then pull back and stop altogether. And then you can continue to repeat. You might use your hands or body or you might use chastity belts or cock cages to prevent simulation of the genitals. Some people create a whole scene or experience around orgasm denial and others simply play with it in passing. They might tease their partner that they’re going to pull back and not let them orgasm. But back to the question. Let’s begin with the basics. Your partner doesn’t really give you an orgasm. They might be a part of the process, but your body — with your brain at the helm — gives you an orgasm. They can physically and mentally be a part of the stimulation process, but ultimately, it’s your nerve endings that communicate with the brain and it’s your brain that fires in multiple regions. And then at orgasm, your brain's center of reason and behavior (the lateral orbitofrontal cortex just behind your left eye) actually shuts down momentarily allowing your animalistic needs to overpower any reservations or preoccupations. When you can orgasm on your own, but not with a partner, oftentimes it’s because you do something physically different on your own. You use toys, you use your hands, you rub on the outside, you contort your body in a natural way, you breathe differently when you’re on your own and it facilitates orgasm easily. But then when you get with a partner, you change it up. You’re more focused on penetration, you move your body for their pleasure, you control your body at different angles, you hold your breath, you hold back or exaggerate your sounds and all of those physical activities simply don’t lead to orgasm. If this is the case, you’ll want to bring your masturbation practices — the angles, the toys, the techniques into your partnered play and replicate them. And this will likely lead to orgasm. In your case, however, you use toys to orgasm and you’ve already tried bringing them in to partnered play, so you likely need to consider another angle: And that’s performance pressure. If you’re doing the exact same things with your partner as you do when you’re alone and you still can’t enjoy an orgasm when your partner is present, it’s likely a matter of mindset, mood and pressure. So first — I want you to remove the physical barriers to orgasm. Is is the way you’re positioned? Move into the position you use when you masturbate most often and have your partner work around you. Is it the setting? Try to replicate the setting in terms of location, lighting, temperature, what you’re wearing. Again, have your partner work around you. Is it the physical sensations? When you use a toy alone,

 Vaginismus: Painful Sex | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 39:12

What are the causes, symptoms and treatment options for Vaginismus? Jess shares resources and chats with her friend Meredith who shares her story of successfully overcoming Vaginismus. As mentioned on this episode, check out the work of Dr. Susie Gronski and the Pelvic Mafia! This podcast is brought to you by Desire Resorts.

 How To Talk To Your Kids About Porn | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 47:57

Jess and Brandon talk about celebrity relationships (again!). Then Nadine Thornhill joins them to share practical advice on how to talk to your kids about sex, porn and body image. Follow Nadine on... Twitter Facebook Instagram Youtube Jess received a related question from a fellow listener. Here is her advice... My ex wife tells me that she caught our teenage son watching porn. She was mortified and wants me to talk to him about it. Where do I even begin? If you don’t talk to your kids about porn, Google, YouTube, SnapChat and their friends will. Oftentimes, they’re not looking for porn, but they stumble across it or their friends present it to them, so it’s essential to have conversations before they encounter this type of material. If you feel uncomfortable talking to them about porn or sex, in general, use this discomfort to open the conversation. Admit that it makes you nervous so that they learn from your ability to acknowledge vulnerable emotions. They’ll also learn that it’s important to have uncomfortable conversations. I suggest that you start by asking them if they have any questions and reminding them that it’s normal to be curious. Even if you don’t want them to watch porn, you don’t want to intensify any shame they may already feel around sex. You can let them know that porn isn’t intended for folks their age and remind them that what they see in porn isn’t what sex looks like in real life. Young people tend to learn about sex from porn because they don’t have access to other resources. And adults do the same. Offer a reminder that what they see in porn includes acting, special effects, editing, and sexual olympians. Just as they don’t learn about relationships from Jersey Shore and they don’t learn to drive watching Fast and the Furious, porn is not designed as a form of education. It can be entertaining and titillating, but it’s not produced with education in mind. Since you’re their parent, you can share your personal values related to porn and remember that your experience may not be their experience. Finally, consider offering them other resources they can turn to if they’re curious about sex. My colleague Nadine Thornhill talks about curating sexuality resources for your kids so that they don’t have to curate their own. Whether you send them to a site like Scarleteen for sex and relationship education or you direct them to erotica sites that reflect a greater diversity of bodies and more realistic interactions, it’s up to you. Regardless of your comfort level with this topic, remember that your child will inevitably seek out resources, so it’s up to you whether or not you want to be a part of the process. This podcast is brought to you by Desire Resorts.

 Why We All Seek Attention & Feel Insecure: The Ayesha & Steph Curry Case | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 31:39

Do you have a partner who craves attention? Do you love getting attention? How do you feel when your partner gets attention from outside sources? Jess and Brandon discuss the Ayesha and Steph Curry case and share their experience with managing insecurity, neediness, attention-seeking and more. This podcast is brought to you by Desire Resorts.

 Ambiamory, Polyamory, Open Relationships | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 36:41

Are you monogamous? Consensually non-monogamous? Ambiamorous? Polyamorous? Have you explored all of your options? And what can you learn from relationship types that are different than your own? Kevin Patterson joins Jess & Brandon to talk about his open marriage of 12 years and counting. He shares some of his mistakes and lessons as well as insightful advice on jealousy for people in monogamous relationships. Follow Kevin on... Instagram Facebook Pick up your copy of Kevin's book, Love is Not Color Blind here. Also check out For Hire: Operator here. This podcast is brought to you by Desire Resorts.

 Here’s How Diet, Sleep, Superfoods and Lifestyle Choices Affect Your Libido | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 39:01

Naturopathic doctor, Dr. Olivia Rose, shares insights on how diet, supplements, herbs, acupuncture and sleep affect your sex drive and overall health. She reveals what foods you should eat in the morning, what substances you should avoid at night, and how hormones play a role in libido. Follow Dr. Olivia on... Twitter  Instagram Facebook  Have a question about naturopathic treatments, clinical nutrition etc.? Join Dr. Olivia every Thursday on Vitarock's Facebook page for her weekly 'Ask Me Anything' Facebook Live broadcast. You can find a quick summary of the episode below. (Thanks to Dr. Olivia for providing these notes!) 1. What is naturopathic medicine? Tell us about your practice. Naturopathic medicine is a health care system that blends modern scientific knowledge and evidence with traditional and natural forms of medicine. As NDs, we assess the whole person by providing physical examinations, nutrition, lifestyle and mental health assessments and we refer for blood work at our local labs when necessary. I have a general practice, however, I do tend to focus on women and men’s health, gastrointestinal health, immune, skin and children’s health. Lifestyle, nutrition, herbs and acupuncture are the modalities I use the most. 2. What is the most common sex-related problem patients present with? (We're assuming low libido is up there.) What are some lifestyle causes of low libido? Low libido is common, especially in women. At least women tend to talk about it more, vaginal dryness, pain during sex and erectile dysfunction in males come up frequently. Lifestyle causes of low libido include poor diet (e.g. not enough or an excess – too much alcohol, caffeine, sugar, fat, processed foods, and also eating too little – not eating frequently enough, not having enough of the key micronutrients such as iron and B12 and macronutrients (missing healthy fat, protein etc.) which are important for blood circulation and hormone health; metabolic syndrome is a condition characterized by high blood pressure, central obesity, elevated blood sugar and abnormal cholesterol and triglyceride levels that increase your risk for stroke, heart disease and diabetes, inactivity – being active maintains good circulation to your pelvic floor and genitalia. Regular physical activity also helps to balance your hormones and maintain healthy testosterone levels. Stress – relationship, workplace, environmental – can play a role. 3. How does diet affect libido? Your diet can play a huge role in sexual desire. Going back to the not enough or too much diets – both can affect libido. Your libido relies on circulation and if your diet isn’t conducive to promoting healthy circulation, your libido will be affected. 4. How does diet effect mood and relationships more generally? Diet and digestion are closely tied to mood. Certain foods and additives in our food supply can have a negative effect on your mood such as MSG – some people are sensitive to MSG and report feeling sluggish, depressed or angry after consuming it. However, the first thing I do before even changing anyone’s diet is to make sure they are eating regularly. Eating at regular intervals can make a huge difference in regulating your mood. It also helps to balance your blood sugar and insulin. I emphasize a diet that contains enough protein with each meal because protein gets broken into the amino acids we require to make our hormones. 5. Can herbs/supplements be used to address libido? Can herbs/supplements be used to improve mood (and relational interactions)? There are many herbs that have traditionally been used for sexual enhancement and mood stabilization for centuries.

 Defensive Partners, Toxic Relationships, Shrinkage and Porn Habits | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 30:58

How do you deal with a defensive partner? How do you manage a partner who lashes out in arguments? Is shrinkage real? What are some signs of a toxic relationship? Do I get a say in my partner’s porn habits? Jess and Brandon answer your questions in another rapid fire round. Please see a rough list of the questions that were addressed on this episode: I followed your 3-step approach on how to have difficult conversations with your partner, but I have some follow-up questions. 78. What if your partner gets defensive? 79. Lashes out? 80. Or simply withdraw or refuses to talk? 81. What if they refuse to go to therapy? 82. I want to go one of those nude beaches you talk about, but I'm afraid I will get a woody. Brandon, has this happened to you? 83. Can you make my penis bigger? 84. Is shrinkage real? 85. Does my partner get a say in my porn habits? 86. Is it your right to tell your partner that you'd prefer they didn't watch porn if it makes you jealous or you aren't comfortable with it? 87. Where is the line for advocating for what you want, and being controlling? 88. What about telling them not to watch certain kinds of porn that you're ethically opposed to? Like free porn which is often exploitative, or porn scenes that are degrading towards women? 89. If your partner has an issue with your porn habits, would you change them or tell them it's your choice? 90. Does Brandon have a brother? 91. What if my wife has a small clitoris? 92. Why does my penis keep dripping after I pee? 93. Can semen clog your drain? 94. How do they know it's semen, did they have to clean out their pipes? 95. I just started dating since graduating college and being with a not-so-great boyfriend for four years. I'm not sure what a healthy relationship should really look like. Can you tell me some signs of a toxic relationship? I want to know what to look for, to make sure it's not an unhealthy situation. This podcast is brought to you by Desire Resorts.

 Body Language in Dating & Mating | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 39:54

How should you adjust your body language during an argument with your partner? What strategies can we use to become active listeners? What role does body language play with single daters? Tune in now to learn from Body Language Expert, Karen Donaldson as she shares her advice and insights with Jess and Brandon. This podcast is brought to you by Desire Resorts.

 Sex Q&A: Anal, Hot-Wifing, Sexless Marriages & Much More | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 49:50

Jess and Brandon answer your questions: Is it normal to want your wife to be a hot-wife? Should I use an enema before anal? What should I do if I can’t get it in? Can a sexless marriage work? Can a couple really recover after cheating? How do I know if I should call it quits on a relationship? And many, many more. Please see a rough transcript below. Thank you to Desire Resorts & Desire Cruises for their support. Be sure to check them out because they offer a clothing-optional couples experience that is unlike any other. To celebrate our 100th episode, we started answering 100 of your questions last week and we continue this week: 39. Is there really a way to move past a cheating partner? Yes. If the one who cheated is not making excuses and is willing to do the work. And if the one who didn’t cheat agrees that they’ll be vulnerable and honest about what they feel AND not use the cheating as a weapon moving forward (e.g. in arguments unrelated to cheating). 40. How can you introduce compromise to a partner who always believes their way is the right way? You compromise first. It’s disarming. If you take an issue that you’re fighting about and say mea culpa - I need to change. The angriest, most stubborn person will likely follow suit. 41. How do you know enough is enough, and you’re just running your own race? If your partner isn’t willing to put in effort to make the relationship work - this might be a sign that you’re not able to become compatible. Having said that, just because they won’t put in the same type of effort you put in doesn’t mean it’s on them to conform to your expectations. But if you’ve tried to work on the relationship from multiple angles - by talking, by arguing, by going to therapy, by completing self-help programs together, by carving time out and you’ve tried a variety of approaches and asked them how they’d like to work on it AND they’re open to none of them, you’re in a relationship with yourself. Try asking them: do you want to work on this relationship and make it better? If they say yes, ask them how they’d like to work on it. 42. Can a man’s semen stink if they drink beer? Is there something that causes women to have a funny smell? Yes. We don’t have scientific evidence that what you eat and drink changes your taste or smell, but we have so many anecdotal reports that I simply can’t ignore. Diets high in fruits and veggies and supposed to increase sweetness and preservatives, smoking and alcohol have been said to change the taste so that it’s more bitter. And when someone ejaculates inside of you, it can absolutely change the way you smell, but the self-cleaning oven will clean it out. And again, always get tested — regardless of whether or not you’re using condoms. 43. How tall are you? 5’4" 44. How do you get brave enough to try new things in the bedroom? Start slow and small. Try it next to the bed instead of in the bed. Then move to the shower and add silicone based lube because you’ll need it in there. Try whispering a few words right before orgasm when your inhibitions are lower. When you get more turned on, the chemical shifts in your body help you to be less self conscious and more confident. And don’t feel pressure to do everything. The tiniest change can have the biggest impact. 45. Can sex still be healthy if it is quick, under 15 minutes all the time? That’s way longer than average. Porn sex lasts so long that our expectations become unrealistic. But if it’s not long enough for you, think about other things you can do - with your hands, your mouth, your toys. Don’t get hung up on intercourse. There is a reason lesbian women have more orgasms that straight women - they’re not hung up on the D. 46.

 38 Sex Questions Answered | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 51:02

It’s our 100th episode! We’re answering rapid-fire questions on everything from jealousy, uneven breasts, and birth control to penis flavours, positions and sex toys. Tune in and keep the questions coming. Sex Questions Answered: Rapid Fire Round Rough Transcript: It’s our 100th episode! Yay us! Thanks so much for listening and for sharing with your friends. If you like the podcast, please do share it and write us a review online. And thank you to Desire Resorts for being our headline sponsor - you know we love their clothing optional beaches and cruises and we welcome any questions you might have about their vacations since the concept is so unique. And speaking of questions, we’re going to be answering 100 sex and relationship questions to celebrate our 100th episode. We’ve been collecting so many questions from you and we want to answer as many as possible so we’ll be doing a rapid fire round today and I’ll do my best to answer as many as possible. We’ll probably have to continue in next week’s episode. Some of these questions come from teens and some come from grandparents, so it’s quite a wide range. Brandon: are you ready? 1. Can pre cum get you pregnant? Yes - it can. If there is sperm present in the urethral tract, pre-cum can carry this sperm into the vagina and it can eventually meet with an egg. 2. Does the birth control pill make you gain weight? People report that it does, but research from 44 studies suggests that it’s temporary — perhaps a side effect of fluid retention. But ultimately, you know your body so if hormonal birth control is affecting your energy, sleep, mood, these factors affect your weight. You also have non-hormonal options like the copper IUD, condoms for the penis, internal condoms that can be worn inside the vagina. 3. If your vagina is only 6 inches (in depth?) how can a 7" or 8" penis fit inside? The average vagina is not that long in an unaroused state. It’s shorter than 4 inches on average. First, the entire penis cannot possibly slide inside and secondly, we believe that the cervix tents as you become aroused, muscle relax and the fornices also provide a little extra space to accommodate the object or penis of your choosing. The average penis length is far below 7 or 8 inches. 4. Should I still use a condom if I’m on the pill and we’ve been together for 2+ years? Whether or not you use condoms isn’t a matter of how long you’ve been together. It’s a matter of health practices like testing, lifestyle factors (like do you take your pill reliably and do you need a backup method?) and risk factors (e.g. are you monogamous?). It’s a personal choice, but if you don’t use condoms, remember that the pill provides zero protection to reduce STI transmission. 5. Why is one breast bigger than the other? The body isn’t symmetrical. Just like your feet are slightly different sizes and your eyebrows will never be twins - only sisters - one breast is usually bigger than the other and that’s cool. No one is going to notice but you and even if they do, they’re not going to care. If you do notice any changes in size or shape, let your healthcare practitioner know so they can decide if any tests are necessary. 6. How do I deal with a jealous child? He’s 12 years old. Remind them that it’s normal to feel jealous and the jealousy sometimes isn’t rational. Focus on governing behaviour — not the feeling itself. It’s okay to feel this way, but you don’t want to be mean to your brother. Tell a story about a time you were jealous and how you responded to normalize the feeling; if you regret your response, admit it and suggest how you might respond today. Drop the comparisons and generally focus on your child’s strengths to...

 Sex Dolls, Semen, Squirting and Nervousness | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 37:29

Jess and Brandon answer listener questions about swallowing, squirting, nervousness, physical affection and sex dolls. Please find a rough summary of the podcast. We’re working on a transcript which should be coming soon! Today we’re talking physical affection, sex headaches, semen swallowing, FMF fantasies and squirting. Thank you to Desire Resorts for their support of this podcast. But first…Sex doll smuggling. A Trinidadian man had his sex doll seized at the border after being in­formed that it con­tra­vened sec­tion 45 (l) of the Cus­toms Act as it has hu­man gen­i­talia. He is now suing Trinidad’s Cus­toms and Ex­cise Di­vi­sion and while I can’t comment on Trinidad’s import policies, I’m always concerned when the government steps in and ultimately dictates what you can and can’t do as consenting adults in the privacy of your bedroom. I ran into this in the UAE when I was working in Dubai. My clients got in trouble for trying to import sex toys and they taught me an important lesson about how to take vibrators in to countries where they’re prohibited: put them next to your hair curler or straightening iron because then they look like they’re part of the same electronic components. And so far it has worked for me. But I just thought this story offered a good reminder that we should talk about sex dolls because there are now sex doll brothels in Canada, Europe, Asia and they must be coming soon to the US - like a boy band, they’re always big in Europe, Asia and Canada first and then they hit the US. And I’ve seen so many lifelike sex dolls on display at trade shows and in sex clubs. Our listener questions are piling up and it’s stressing me out a bit because I don’t like to leave you hanging, so we’re going to address a series of questions today. 1. A 'buddy of mine' is worried that something is wrong because he doesn’t always want to be touched - especially right after work or when he’s watching the game. His girlfriend gets mad because she wants to kiss or cuddle and he just feels smothered and guilty for not wanting to touch her. Is this a psychological issue? How should he deal with it? Just as some people crave touch constantly, others abhor it. Wherever you fall along the spectrum of desire of physical touch, you’re perfectly normal. As long as you can function (i.e. go to work, maintain relationships), I wouldn’t worry about how little or how much touch you desire. In your friend’s case, it sounds as though he simply wants some space and needs to clearly communicate his boundaries to his partner. He should let her know when and how he wants to be touched and clarify that there are simply times when he wants physical space. He shouldn’t feel guilty. Many mothers complain about feeling “touched out” at the end of the day; their kids have been all over them all day and they just don’t want anyone else (i.e. their partners) to hug, kiss or initiate sex. Your friend may be experiencing something similar. Compatibility in relationships isn’t rooted finding someone who wants the same things as you (e.g. you don’t have to share a mutual love of cuddling); compatibility involves working together to meet one another’s needs and accepting that one person cannot fulfill all of your needs everyday for the rest of your lives. If his girlfriend wants more affection, he can offer it at times and she can also seek it elsewhere — she could cuddle with the dog, get more hugs from friends and family or spend some time touching herself. Once you acknowledge that you’re not required to meet your partner’s every need (and they can’t possibly meet all of yours), you’ll likely cultivate happier, more satisfying relationships. 2. Is it safe to swallow your own semen? It sure is! You can taste and swallow your own semen as long as you...

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