The Marriage Podcast for Smart People

Men are called to e the spiritual leaders in their marriages: to set the vision and lead the way in serving God as a couple. Many men find this challenging, whether due to feeling inadequate for such an important task or feeling awkward about assuming such a vulnerable role. But taking spiritual leadership seriously can bring all kinds of great benefits into your marriage, from increased unity and purpose to less conflict. Join us as we explore what it means to be a spiritual leader, and how you can develop this aspect of your own marriage.

Pornography is such an ever-present part of society today, and many couples even think that watching porn together can be part of a healthy sex life. Many couples use porn for ideas or to give their sex life a bit of extra spice. But the research shows that this might not be the best idea. Porn use, either joint or individual, has some very serious consequences for your marriage, from destroying your trust and intimacy to lowering self esteem and even negatively impacting your sex lives in the long-term. The popular view may be that porn is a harmless distraction, but the reality is that it's a dangerous habit that you need to break out of.

t's easy to get stuck in a cycle of negative attribution in your marriage, where stresses and dissatisfaction cause you to interpret everything your spouse does in a negative way. This is all driven by errors, biases and over-generalizations our brain makes in relation to other people, and it can have a big impact on your attitudes and actions towards your spouse. But what's interesting is that these same processes of interpreting what your spouse does can also be a real force for good in your marriage, if you learn to look at things the right way. Join us as we examine this process of attribution and how to make it work for you in your marriage.

As it's Veteran's Day coming up, this week we're going to honor the brave servicemen and women who serve our country, and the spouses they leave at home each time they leave for duty. Military couples face a lot of hardships in their relationship, from the anxiety and chaos of the weeks leading up to deployment, to finding ways to cope while apart and coming back together at the end, only to go through it all over again. And yet even in the midst of these incredibly challenging circumstances, these extraordinary couples can still find ways to draw positives from their experiences and strengthen their marriage even while they're apart.

Couples who want more from their sex lives often look at foreplay as a place for improvement. Questions around the ideal length and nature of foreplay to allow the wife to reach orgasm are common. But is foreplay the real determinant of sexual satisfaction? Join us as we examine the research on foreplay and sexual compatibility, go through some practical considerations, and take a look at some of the other factors that might be affecting your sex life and frequency of orgasm.

How does a disapproving family impact your marriage? Maybe your parents don't get a long with your spouse, or maybe it's your friends and social network who disapprove of the union. Marriages do not exist in isolation, and the opinions of others can easily influence how you perceive an interact with your spouse. In today's show we look at how the opinions of your social circle can influence you, and how you can stop them from having a negative impact on the quality of your marriage.

Check out The Marriage Cruise for Smart Couples at: http://oyf.link/cruise We'd love to have you aboard!

Long distance marriages are becoming increasingly common. With one or both spouses working away from home or traveling for weeks at a time it can be tough to stay connected. Luckily there are plenty of things you can do to keep your marriage going while you're apart, and there are even some positives you can take away from the situation. Making long distance marriages work is all about managing your expectations and keeping in contact in a way that's real and grounded. Today's podcast takes you through the do's and don'ts of long distance marriage. We also look at some of the ways that reuniting after time apart can be problematic, and what you can do to ease the transition.

Children leaving home can create a void in some married couple's lives that is hard to fill. This empty nest syndrome can leave couples without a clear idea of who they are, especially if they have been investing all their time and sense of meaning into their kids. At the same time, this can be a liberating and exciting time for couples as they are freed from the day to day pressures of parenting and become free to explore their own interests and devote more time to each other. In today's podcast we look at how the empty nest syndrome can go both ways for your marriage based on psychological theories of role transition and relationship turbulence. We'll also give you ways to make sure you handle the transition well, as well as looking at what happens ewhen kids fail to launch or return to the family home.

Trauma bonding occurs when an abused or victimized individual begins to feel a deep sense of attachment to and dependence on their abuser. In marriage this often forms in abusive marriages, where the abused spouse continues to love and need their abusive spouse in spite of the pain they cause. Trauma bonds form through a power imbalance in the marriage and through a cycle of violence and reconciliation that creates an enduing bond between abuser and abused. For an abused spouse to break free of their situation requires them to overcome this bond through re-balancing the power in their marriages and learning to break free of old habits. Join us as we take an in depth look at recognizing, understanding and overcoming trauma bonding in marriage.

Money is a big worry for many couples. And not surprisingly, financial hardship can have a negative impact on marriage by creating tension and worry, and by reducing the amount and quality of time you can spend together. But does it have to be like that? In this week's episode we show how money problems don't have to impact your marriage if you have the right mindset and take steps to address the issue. By developing your financial management skills, while working on your marriage in other areas like communication, quality time and conflict, you can ensure that your marriage remains thriving and intimate regardless of your bank balance.

In today's marriage Q&A episode we'll be answering questions from our supporters and using them to shed insights that you can relate to any marriage. We'll be looking at the question o shared leisure activities, and rebuilding trust when you feel disconnected from your spouse. Join us for more insight into building a thriving, passionate marriage!

In today's Q&A episode we look at boundaries with other married friends. How can you stay a good friend to someone when you feel they are being inappropriately attentive to your husband? We also look at Post Infidelity Stress Disorder, or PISD, and how to work through it in your marriage when you're both experiencing it together.

A lot of married couples struggle with the issue of shared interests. How much time should you spend together? Is it important to have the same hobbies? Do I have to care about all the same things as my spouse? Research shows that generally shared interests and joint leisure time are a good thing for marriage, but it's more complex than that. You have to make sure you both enjoy the activities you're doing together and are happy with the amount of time you spend on them, while both feeling like you have some say in how your free time is spent. The kind of activities you take part in are important too: are you just doing the same thing in the vicinity of each other or are you really connecting? But underneath this issue of shared leisure is a deeper question, that speaks to a deeper need that many married couples feel.

Couples with a large age gap between them have historically been thought of as somewhat unusual and unhealthy, but today such couples are becoming more and more common. And research is showing that while these marriages may face some additional challenges there's no reason why a couple with a big age gap can't have a thriving, passionate marriage. Couples where one spouse is at least ten years older than the other may have been raised with very different values, which may cause them to come into conflict. There may also be an imbalance of power int he marriage, with the older spouse naturally assuming a leadership role. But all these problems can be faced using the same skills that nourish any marriage: good communication, conflict resolution, shared interests, and working together to create a shared sense of value and meaning.