HEALTHY FAMILY CONNECTIONS show

HEALTHY FAMILY CONNECTIONS

Summary: HEALTHY FAMILY CONNECTIONS addresses the many dilemmas facing parents, couples and kids, offering out of the box solutions that empower listeners to confidently meet their parenting challenges. Being a family in our era is challenging under the best of circumstances. Parents contend with a culture in transition and competing ideas for parenting. Neil Brown, author of parenting hit “Ending the Parent-Teen Control Battle,” is a master family therapist with a talent for providing clarity amidst the confusion, addressing common concerns as well as serious problems.

Podcasts:

 My Husband Has Left The Bedroom | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 00:01:30

In this episode Neil responds to a woman who is at a loss about what to do to get her husband to engage. He won’t initiate conversation, no longer sleeps in the bedroom, and will follow instructions, but that is unsatisfying. Neil goes back in time to imagine how the relationship began and how it became so disengaged. Neil anticipates that this is causing serious emotional problems for this woman and advises her to focus on her own mental health prior to trying to understand and make sense of the marriage. Neil challenges listeners to see how their attempts to solve relationship problems can often be part and parcel to the problem itself. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

 Am I Being Clear or Rigid? | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 00:12:24

In this episode Neil answers a question from a Dad who in dealing with his ADHD 14 year old son is being labeled by his wife, his mother, and his sister as being rigid. Dad thinks they are enabling his son and wants to know if he is being clear or rigid and how to deal with the woman in his life. Neil speaks to special needs teen development, best ways to work with them, how to be clear without being rigid and how to collaborate with his wife, mother and sister. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

 What If The Problem Is Me? | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 00:16:31

In this episode Neil answers a question from a Dad who, after reading many books on parenting strategies, realizes that the real struggle is with his own behavior. He wants to know how to “keep his cool” when his kids don’t listen. Neil helps Dad by explaining the difference between unhealthy and healthy expectations and goals. Neil invites Dad to embrace the opportunities for personal growth offered by being a parent and demonstrates how to talk with kids to successfully set up change in the parent-child relationship. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

 Recovery Is Not For Sissies | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 00:13:50

In this episode Neil responds to a Mom whose young adult daughter is just getting out of a drug and alcohol rehabilitation program. Her daughter wants to use medical marijuana for her anxiety and her mother knows that she’s a lot calmer on it. Mom wants to know if she should support that or not. Neil speaks to the damage done by many years of substance abuse by this young adult and offers a paradigm for making healthy decisions going forward. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

 Should I Get Over My Feelings About My Husband Using Porn? | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 00:12:45

In this episode Neil responds to a woman who doesn’t like that her husband is using pornography. Neil explains both the healthy and destructive uses of porn and the impact they have on relationships. He then helps this woman understand how she might engage a healthy discussion about her feelings. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

 The Five Critical Things You Should Expect From Therapy | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 00:10:04

In this episode Neil responds to a woman concerned that her therapy isn’t providing her with what she needs. She’s being advised to get divorced and start anti-depressants, and she doesn’t like those options. Neil lays out the 5 critical things high quality therapy needs to provide, when a client feels mired in a painful situation. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

 5 Vital Problem Solving Skills To Teach Your Kids. | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 00:14:20

In this episode Neil responds to a mother whose 2 daughters fight over everything. Neil identifies the 5 vital conflict management skills necessary in life and gives Mom a way to introduce them and teach them to her girls. In this way, she can make using the skills more attractive to them than fighting and arguing. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

 Are You Feeding The Behavior That You Want Your Child To Change? | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 00:14:45

In this episode Neil responds to a question from a mother struggling with her bright talented daughter who is critical of almost everyone. She knows something needs to be done when the school tells her that they’ve talked to their daughter about bullying. On the school’s advice, parents sent their daughter to therapy, but with nothing changing they reached out to Neil. Neil examines nurture and nature possibilities and helps Mom understand that overtly or subtly, there is a control battle going on in the family that is supporting the very behavior they want to change. Neil shows this Mom how to talk with her daughter to change the family dynamic and how to reclaim an empowered and positive parental role. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

 The Right Way To Get Your Kid Into A Great College | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 00:10:27

In this episode, Neil addresses the College Admissions Scandal and speaks to the importance of character development for achieving personal happiness and success. He challenges us to look at the lengths we go to clear the way for our youth, robbing them of opportunities to learn and grow from failure. Finally, Neil explains that a “great” college for one person may not be a “great” college for another and the right college will be a “great” college. In this podcast Neil reminds listeners that the give-a-way drawing of his book, Ending the Parent-Teen Control Battle, Celebrating his 100th episode is still open. To enter, simply review this podcast on iTunes and send Neil an email from his website. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

 How Do I Deal With My Critical Mother? | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 00:16:34

Episode Description: In this episode, Neil responds to a woman who has her mother living next door who helps with childcare, but is chronically critical. She is so beaten down that she finds herself crying at the slightest provocation. Neil helps this Mom first attend to her burnout, and then change the pattern of her lifelong relationship with her chronically critical mother. Neil offers examples of new ways of responding to Mom’s criticisms that create a more empowered sense of self. In this podcast Neil celebrates his 100th episode with a give-a-way drawing of his book, Ending the Parent-Teen Control Battle. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

 We Took A Stand And Made Some Progress; Now What? | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 00:14:10

Episode Description: In this episode, Neil responds to a mother who took a stand with her 15-year-old son; she clarified parental expectations, removed privileges, and got good results. Now she wants to know how to avoid this being the new pattern of having to constantly withdraw privileges to get his attention. Neil uses this question to address the larger issue of changing out of an adversarial parent-teen relationship into one where parents and teens work together in support of adolescent growth and development. Neil offers language that takes the shame out of setting and enforcing limits and standards and makes it a more normal part of adolescent growth and development. Neil shows this Mom how to engage her son in a healthy dialogue about his own readiness for privileges. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

 How Can I Be As Confident At Home As I Am At Work? | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 00:14:21

Episode Description: In this episode, Neil responds to a mother who knows her childhood is affecting how she gets her feelings hurt as a mother and wife. But she wants tools for being able to be as confident and adult in her roles at home as she is in her roles at work. Neil offers this Mom a powerful healing exercise and demonstrates how to use it effectively. Neil shares that most of us, including him, have childhood issues that affect us and being aware of that and having a tool for healing that is something we can all benefit from. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

 How Do I Not Take This Personally? | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 00:13:16

In this episode, Neil responds to a mother who wants to know how not to take her daughter’s disrespect and hostility personally, when she is only that way towards her. To the Mom, it is obviously personal. Neil helps Mom see how her daughter’s behavior is tapping into her own childhood issues of “never being or doing enough”. Neil helps this Mom differentiate between her childhood sense of self, and her adult sense of self and empowers her to respond to her daughter from her compassionate adult self. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

 My Stubborn Son Won’t Listen | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 00:15:43

In this episode, Neil responds to a mother struggling with her son who avoids school work, starts and gives up on positive activities, and alienates friends. Neil helps this Mom set some goals: to help her son learn responsibility, make and keep commitments, cooperate with parents, and develop peer social skills. Then Neil gives Mom a strategy that will set the ball in motion to address them. Step one is changing the relationship pattern in the home. Step two is connecting with the school and 4H, to know her son’s needs and support him. Neil ends by challenging the listener to identify a relationship pattern that they need to change, a pattern that is limiting their potential. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

 My Preschooler Fights Me When It’s Time To Go To School | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 00:10:55

: Episode Description: In this episode, Neil responds to a mother and preschool teacher wanting to know how to get preschoolers with Separation Anxiety out of the car and into the classroom. Neil addresses this parent/teacher concern after consulting with Joe Newman, author of Raising Lions. Neil goes on to explain the many reasons why it is vital that the parent own this responsibility and he gives parents a prescription for accomplishing it. Have a question for Neil? Submit it now for discussion on a future episode of The Healthy Family Connections Podcast: http://neildbrown.com/submit

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