Wired's Footnotes show

Wired's Footnotes

Summary: At Wired, we report on all manner of topics, from science to tech to culture, and in so doing we’re bound to drop some delightfully obscure topics and language. But don’t fret. Matt Simon is here every week with Footnotes to recap the most ravishing lingo and ideas that adorn Wired.com. It’s like English class, but with more crude photoshops and fewer Gatsbys.

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  • Artist: Wired
  • Copyright: Copyright 2013 CondeNast. All rights reserved.


 Ep. 15: Your Mother Loves You, Even if You're on Drugs | File Type: video/x-m4v | Duration: 3:46

This week on an episode of Footnotes that's worried sick about you, we find out why it's called Mother Nature, and not any number of other relatives.

 Ep. 14: War Pigeons and Cranky Bees, Overlords of a Wingy Future | File Type: video/x-m4v | Duration: 3:47

I predict the future, but only vaguely, and entirely inaccurately. Sound familiar? Nostradamus did the same thing, yet he gets a History Channel special, and I don't.

 Ep. 13: Crossdressing Englishmen and Tesla's Electric Boogaloo | File Type: video/x-m4v | Duration: 3:47

This week on Footnotes: Angry Luddites stick it to the man by "crossdressing" Yeah, that'll show 'em. But only if they layer properly.

 Ep. 12: Inspector Gadget's Mixed Messages and a Scorned, Self-Destructive Moon | File Type: video/x-m4v | Duration: 3:48

This week on Footnotes: the universe's star-crossed lovers Mars and Phobos deal with the homewrecking Curiosity rover. Someone's gonna get hurt.

 Ep. 11: Hemophilic Weaponry and 1,001 Nights of Not Being Murdered | File Type: video/x-m4v | Duration: 4:01

For centuries, the 1,001 Nights tales have inspired Easterners and Westerners to not marry a new wife each day and kill her.

 Ep. 10: Panda Dinner Parties and a Giant Egg Teaching Semantics | File Type: video/x-m4v | Duration: 3:10

This week on Footnotes: Among plants, grass is that really successful sibling you?ve always been jealous of. It?s pretty, and it can survive just about anything. But in the video above, I tell you how to manage it in the creepiest way possible.

 Ep. 9: Drunk as a Skunk, Sober as a Bird, and Twice the Lice | File Type: video/x-m4v | Duration: 2:58

We're talking about bootlegging, and why it isn't wise to take an American's drink away. And can you guess why boats don't wear shoes? Yeah, me neither.

 Ep. 8: God on a Motorcycle and Tiny Mythical Bullies (Sans Motorcycles) | File Type: video/x-m4v | Duration: 2:58

Eye candy. Whose eye? God’s eye, which is an indeterminate color. We’re talking about the all-seeing eye, and it’s probably in your pocket right now, unless you’re rich.

 Ep. 7: Is Mars Made of Kisses? And When Did Crows Get So Cool? | File Type: video/x-m4v | Duration: 3:14

Animals are totally jeally of humans' brains and thumbs and whatnot, so they've gone and commandeered all of our bow ties, and picked up a few smoking habits along the way. Welcome to the strange world of anthropomorphism.

 Ep. 6: Stoned Fish, Alliterative Divers and the Unrepentant Cuteness of ‘@’ | File Type: video/x-m4v | Duration: 3:12

This week on Footnotes: Who lives in a diving suit under the sea? Diver Dan! He also talks to fish, as it happens, even the ones on drugs.

 Ep. 5: In Heaven With NASA, in Hell With YouTube Commenters | File Type: video/x-m4v | Duration: 3:21

This week on Footnotes, we go to heaven with NASA to explore the overview effect.

 Ep. 4: Tinker Bell Goes Galactic and Wolverines Adorn Homes | File Type: video/x-m4v | Duration: 3:05

This week on Footnotes: Tinker Bell spaces out, while back on Earth dogs look like clouds and clouds look like dogs. In a word, pareidolia.

 Ep. 3: Loonies Eating Fabric and Words McDonald’s Doesn’t Like | File Type: video/x-m4v | Duration: 3:16

This week on Footnotes, we’re talking about McWords, which the marketing department at McDonald’s could really do without.

 Ep. 2: Dudes Dressed Like Bells and Trolls Betraying Their Heritage | File Type: video/x-m4v | Duration: 3:07

This week on Footnotes we trace the origins of “dude,” or His Dudeness, or Duder, or El Duderino, if you’re not into the whole brevity thing.

 Ep. 1: Lazy Sharks, Humiliated Seals, and Googlers Eating Dog Food | File Type: video/x-m4v | Duration: 3:13

Travel to Iceland by way of Photoshop to observe sleeper sharks, flipperless seals, Björk, and vomiting chefs, then, naturally, start talking about people who eat dog food.


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