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Soccergirl, Incorporated

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Confident and busty, I don't like to keep my best features under wraps. I'm sure I'll get my fair share of assholes who think I'm a whore, or a slut or both, and they can suck my dick. My show isn't about feminism or sexual politics, it just assumes you're hip to the fact that chicks with hot tits should be proud of them just like they're proud of their smarts and their soccer skills. That said, tune in here for stories of amazing adventures, circus freaks, hilarity, raw sex, sweet tunes, and a voice that'll make you cream your pants. I love you.



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Number of ratings: 476 Votes
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1394

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Date Added 25-Apr-2005 Hits: 28937 Rating: 1.87 Votes: 476

 

If you liked this show, you might like The 305 Femme

Average Registered User Rating: 5.00 (out of 5)
Number of review: 2 Reviews

Review by poolhall (date: 03-Sep-2005)
Subject: Soccergirl Rocks
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Review by poolhall (date: 03-Sep-2005)
Subject: Soccergirl - Try this on for size
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EXPLICIT MATERIAL - ADULTS ONLY


Soccergirl, Incorporated Episodes -

11.09.09 SG #323 Dirty Thirty The Movie | Play in Popup.
A four-day opium binge

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11.03.09 SG #322 My Tweets Take the Piss Out
My pee hole rips you a new one.
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ASG009 Body Language | Play in Popup.
Butt out weekend

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09.28.09 SG #321 Dirty Thirty
How many preemies does it take to beat a regular?
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09.13.09 SG #320 The Making of Oh Glorious Day | Play in Popup.
This is what happens when George Kalman comes over to make a movie.

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08.23.09 SG #319 Cat Rocket
That's a pore excuse for a butthole
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07.19.09 SG #318 Science Bruce
I swear I'm not cryin' I just got something sad in my eye.
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06.10.09 SG #317 Genetics
My genetics summer, 2009
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05.21.09 SG #316 Stress
Pain is a subjective state
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ASG008 Pirates, Free Drinks and Star Trek | Play in Popup.
Is a cherry a berry?

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05.14.09 SG #315 Libertarians
I need a prophylactic psychotropic
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ASG007 Pinky Toe, Talking Dirty and Breasted Americans | Play in Popup.
Verne Troyer is such a cute little pinky toe

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05.07.09 SG #314 Neo-Nazi Baby Shower
Ryan's radishy ingrown toenail
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04.30.09 SG #313 Murder in the Heartland
A nipple in the butt
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ASG006 Oprah, Exes and Hands Off | Play in Popup.
Exes are like Wonder Woman Pez...

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04.23.09 SG #312 Coagulum
Rectal probe electrostimulation and artificial chimp vaginas.
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Update
Just a quick note for the true believers
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ASG005 Getting Girlfriends and Organ Donation | Play in Popup.
Girlfriends are like giant squid

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04.09.09 SG #311 Asian Monkey Plug
Vagina cement.
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04.02.09 SG #310 Chasing el Chupacabra | Play in Popup.
Investigating the legend

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ASG004 Memory Lane, Babies and The Economy | Play in Popup.
A public beach and Plan B.

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03.23.09 SG #309 Judge Mental
A buttery little cup of soupy tea
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03.04.09 SG #308 Clit Boner
Fred Phelps and the Westboro Baptist Church are coming to Albany!
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ASG003 Aliens vs. Robots | Play in Popup.
Visit the Ask Soccergirl website for more information. Or just SUBSCRIBE: Regular format works on ipods, streams Large format works well on large screens including Apple TV What is the difference between robots and aliens? Today’s question is from Eliza in MA. Enter the Ask Soccergirl logo contest and see your design get world famous! SUBMIT A QUESTION! Please use my [...]

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ASG002 Decisions, Ninjas and Movies | Play in Popup.
Download here Visit the Ask Soccergirl website for more information. New feed to subscribe to, coming soon! Why do women have such a hard time making decisions? Is being a soccergirl like being a ninja? What kind of movies do soccergirls like? Today’s questions come from Brandon in Oklahoma, Sarah B. in California and Jason in [...]

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02.12.09 SG #307 Transvaginal Nephrectomy
Download Even the most extreme humans are still lame by animal standards. So Christian Bale went crazy. So sue me. Ryan’s statistics test. Transvaginal nephtrectomy and/or natural orifice surgery (out the vagina). The difference between serials and periodicals. The Central Law Journal. American Lumberman. Titanoboa! If you had a snake that big… you could ride it! [...]
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ASG001 Kissing and Farts | Play in Popup.
Ask a hot chick the kinds of things you're too afraid to ask hot chicks. And definitely call her a chick. She loves that.

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01.27.09 SG #306 Dogfish Head
Welcome to pickle time!
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FM002 Karate Chop | Play in Popup.
Boost your self esteem by getting proactive

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01.11.09 SG #305 An Important Announcement
Download A gingerbread Ryan I made. Welcome to the show! The Limited Edition Fall Series of Miller High Life Light: “enjoy after the adventure.” The many applications of that play-a-song-when-you-open-it greeting card technology. Ryan P. on Seven Second Delay, Joe Biden, my new magical toothbrush, and our incredibly important announcement! In addition to a magical toothbrush [...]
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01.05.09 SG #304 Obluberated
Download Happy New Year, everyone! I’m back after a very hearty holiday. Holy shit it’s snowing. My stomach hurts from laughing and I’m wondering if this is what baby-having women call a good pain. I haven’t talked for a long time (or I hadn’t before the holiday). Some weird freestyle singing. A question from Clay envokes [...]
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FM001 The Feisty Meatball Experiment | Play in Popup.
Download here Quirky, smirky and smoove A sketch comedy show about being a strong woman in a hard world where money talks. Feminism will never be boring again with Feisty Meatball! Ask the crystal meatball your toughest questions. Follow the philosopher’s meatball from here to eternity. Get fashion tips from the cutest and brightest. Feisty Meatball: An exuberant, spirited [...]

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12.09.08 SG #303 Christmas Tree
How can you call yourself a shop of a thing if you don't even have the thing you're a shop of?
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11.26.08 SG #302 Thanksgiving Special
There is a fire in my loins and it is not from turkey
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11.05.08 SG #301 Resurrected
I'm back, suckahs!
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10.21.08 SG #300 A Differentlytarded Anniversary Special
Everybody in the world, you mean the world to me
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10.07.08 SG #299.5 Golden Showers | Play in Popup.
Sean McCabe's hit single

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10.02.08 SG #299 Hokey Pokey
I'm a mac and I know that.
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09.25.08 SG #298 The Galapagos, Part One | Play in Popup.
Galapagos, I love you!

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09.18.08 SG #297 Soccergirl’s Dragon*Con, 2008 | Play in Popup.
Menu from which I pick weapons.

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09.11.08 SG #296 Dry Idea
Try it in your butt.
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09.05.08 SG #295 An Interview with James Randi | Play in Popup.
James Randi and me.

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08.29.08 SG #294.5 Dragoncon, Ho
A quick update before the live extravaganza!
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08.23.08 SG #294 Back from the Galapagos!
Thank you George Hrab and the JREF!
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08.07.08 SG #293 Dawnapadrewzatwoza 1 | Play in Popup.
A teaser.

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08.03.08 SG #292 Just a Muscle
Download the show here sucka: Download From DnD 365 (also from Baltimore) I’ve been on fiyah and I think it’s because I’ve been reading my head off lately. Sometimes it just feels hectic inside my head but other times I’m able to laser beam it right out. I’m a regular mystery. I’m an irregular number. I’m a particle [...]
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07.27.08 SG #291 Ryan’s Passenger
A brilliant, confident pair of tits.
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07.20.08 SG #290 Mythbusters | Play in Popup.
The Amazing Meeting, Part Three

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07.15.08 SG #289 Bird Flu
Cutting edge fucking podcasting
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07.09.08 SG #288 Dawn-a-pa-Drew-za-two-za
A hearty recap with Dawn and Drew
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07.02.08 SG #287 Straitjacket Escape | Play in Popup.
The Amazing Meeting, Part Two

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06.28.08 SG #286 The Amazing Meeting, Part 1 | Play in Popup.
The Universe is a fucked up place

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06.27.08 SG #285.75 The 300th Episode Promo
Play it as you will, homes.
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06.25.08 SG #285.5 Quick Update
The Amazing Meeting
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06.13.08 SG #285 Soccergirl Does Balticon | Play in Popup.
Footage from the live show and so much more.

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06.06.08 SG #284 Soccergirl Live
The annotated live episode from Balticon
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05.30.08 SG #283 George Hrab
Suspended from the rafters for this silent movie.
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05.19.08 SG #282 Sissy Test
I had a fight with a dude in a wheelchair once
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05.14.08 SG #281 A Walk in the Woods | Play in Popup.
Soccergirl and Ryan P. adventure in the great outdoors.

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05.09.08 SG #280 Anorectal Bleeding | Play in Popup.
To a bear, what is reality?

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05.03.08 SG #279 A Snarky Meatball
Yeah, I think you could say it's pretty Shakespearean.
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04.26.08 SG #278 The Goliath Bird Eating Spider
I think I'm the weisenheimer.
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04.20.08 SG #277 Dick Lover
An ode to Richard Dawkins.
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04.14.08 SG #276 I Am Still God | Play in Popup.
Thomas Aquinas, eat your heart out.

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04.10.08 SG #275 Trode Salve
Download the show here sucka: I was just packin’ up some merch. How ’bout them 49ers. This is my nutshell. If you get the newsletter then you already know about the amazon.com situation. If you don’t get the newsletter, you can sign up here. Here’s the story: As you probably know, after nearly a year of [...]
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04.05.08 SG #274 Me Migraine
I wonder if Mr. Tumnus ever had tongue numbness.
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03.30.08 SG #273 The Pre-Edison Phonautograph
Consider my self's back, patted.
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03.27.08 SG #272 Dreamland of Tibet | Play in Popup.
Soccergirl, Inc. was there before the uprising.

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03.21.08 SG #271 Rip You A New Jesus
Feeling my breasts until the break of dawn.
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03.17.08 SG #270 Burlington, 2008 Part 2 | Play in Popup.
My head is so preciously small.

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03.13.08 SG #269 Burlington, 2008 Part 1 | Play in Popup.
No hair going up means levitation is real.

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JACK WAKES UP | Play in Popup.
A free PDF of Seth Harwood shakin' 'em down.

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03.07.08 SG #268 Dumb Design, More Like
Dear Ryan, Won't you tell me the story of John DeLorean?
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03.01.08 SG #267 My Bloody Something
Who farted? Was that you, listeners?
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02.24.08 SG #266 Cocksuck my Vagina, God
Dude, where's my automobile?
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02.20.08 SG #265 A Podcast Fiction | Play in Popup.
Soccergirl interviews Seth Harwood

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02.16.07 SG #264 V-A-L-E-N-T-I-N-E
Happy belated Valentine's Day, listeners!
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02.11.08 SG #263 Bastard Sons of God in the News
Squinch your butthole up just a little bit right now.... for me, listeners.
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02.07.08 SG #262 Fuck You, Fox News | Play in Popup.
Soccergirl vs. Fox News Religion Correspondent, Lauren Green

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02.01.08 SG #261 Oh the Music II
You can play it for your friends or rub it on one of those new-fangled compact disks.
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01.26.08 SG #260 Lead Singer, Legal Adult, Lady Killer
Anarcho power lifting with bionic arms
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01.23.08 SG #259 Do You Remember Menudo?
Ryan P. is about to lay somethin' else on your penis
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01.17.08 SG #258 Bawdies Rawkin’
I learned that from Cinderella back in Nam
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01.13.08 SG #257 I’m More Like a Unicorn Than Anything
I'm writing this book. I'm drinking singer's tea. I'm writing this book.
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01.08.08 SG #256 An Ideas Man
Introducing The Good Doctor
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01.03.08 SG #255 Do it Like a Homie | Play in Popup.
You know you're missing out if you don't check me out

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12.28.07 SG #254 Dona Nobis Pacem
Happy Boxing Day Boxing Day everyone!
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12.23.07 SG #253 That Lobster We Had That Time | Play in Popup.
A tragically delicious video short

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12.19.07 SG #252 A 2007 Soccergirl Christmas
Sleep in regular peace
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12.13.07 SG #251 The Littlest Mohel
This will make your dick and balls feel really good
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12.09.07 SG #250 De Rerun Natura
Ryan's winter jamz
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12.05.07 SG #249 Finley Spruce
I gave her a poon job
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12.02.07 SG #248 Invincible Donovan University
Dear listeners who believe in Homeopathyâ?¦ Youâ??re wrong.
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11.27.07 SG #247 Spice Up You’re Chili
Duties VS. Doodies
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11.21.07 SG #246 Based on Toy
Christ Allegory, Masturbation Reference, Top Secret Document, Car Bicycle Chase
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11.16.07 SG #245 On Unions
On behalf of my hard working brothers and sisters of letters
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11.12.07 SG #244 Mocktoberfest Episode Three | Play in Popup.
The Interviews

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11.06.07 SG #243 The Occultivator
We need to start building splintles... if we're going to be protected when the plague comes... I mean the rage virus... I mean the flu pandemic
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11.02.07 SG #242 Mocktoberfest Episode Two | Play in Popup.
The Geriatric Bugaloo

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10.29.07 SG #241 Mocktoberfest Episode One | Play in Popup.
Introducing the Heroes

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10.23.07 SG #240 The Fun Drive
The most un-selling-outingest entertainment around
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10.17.07 SG #239 Canadian Thanksgiving
Why the Canadian Thanksgiving is lamer than the Original Thanksgiving which everybody knows was made in America
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10.12.07 SG #238 Cuttyhunk Crack Dealer | Play in Popup.
People love crack

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10.07.07 SG #237 A Snack Called Lunch
There's no such thing as safe sex when it comes to hearts.
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10.02.07 SG #236 The Opposite of Prime Time
Remember folks, mutual stalking is a victimless crime.
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09.29.07 SG #235 Pee on the Sting
Bowlingirl's confession, part two.
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09.20.07 SG #234 Con-certo Number 2 | Play in Popup.
Aquaman knows my town!

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09.18.07 SG #233 The Long Con | Play in Popup.
Snow White in the hizzy

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09.15.07 SG #232 Man on the Sturg | Play in Popup.
We're not just selling glass pipes and hemp lip balm... we're selling freedom.

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09.11.07 SG #231 Fight me, I’m Irish | Play in Popup.
Ouch! Right on the nog

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09.07.07 SG #230 Sturgis in my Nut Cell | Play in Popup.
Real live boobs and they're not even mine

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09.05.07 SG #229 The Con
Mister Spock and his Spocky jock
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08.30.07 SG #228 Foot Operated Queef Pump
If you were going on a desert island and you could only bring one line of incest porn...
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08.26.07 SG #227 Interspecies Smackdown
Welcome to the 24th century, Soccergirl!
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08.22.07 SG #226 Ryan’s Majestic Graduation | Play in Popup.
This is what you get when Soccergirl is your girlfriend

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08.19.07 SG #225 Chinesed Ryan
Now with 100 percent more Ryan
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08.14.07 SG #224 The Corn Palace
Having sex with a horse... at least you've got a ride home
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08.10.07 SG #223 Active Denial Technology
The Bowlingirl investigation part four
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08.02.07 SG #222 Powerbars for the Soul
Fuck the chicken soup guy
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07.29.07 SG #221 Squanto St. Paul
Vote for the show at podcastawards.com!
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07.25.07 SG #220 Oh the Music
The nomination mission was a success!
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07.21.07 SG #219 Srgjan Kerim
A noodle to China
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07.15.07 SG #218 Don Pablo
Hello! Hola? Speaka the English?
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07.11.07 SG #217 Maintainium
An extremely rare and inert compound found only in peace time.
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07.06.07 SG #216 America Bowls
Get that queef monkey off my frequency!
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06.29.07 SG #215 Emperor’s New Condoms
Chemical rot is all a chemical's got
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06.25.07 SG #214 Theoretically Possible Bob Is Back
This is cutting fucking edge podcasting
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06.21.07 SG #213 Spontaneous Buddahood
Female ducks have very complicated genitalia.
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06.16.07 SG #212 Magical Stan
Ruth Bell Graham wore lipstick because she didn't think it was a credit to Christ to be drab.
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06.11.07 SG #211 Cockenpox
Now that's ironic. Alanis Morissette, take note.
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06.02.07 SG #210 The Club Soda Challenge
America Democracy War Bad
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05.27.07 SG #209 Tickle Chicken
Hurray to Ryan for graduating!
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05.22.07 SG #208 I Have Never Pooped in My Pants (and other tales) | Play in Popup.
also Flintstones vitamins.

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05.16.07 SG #207 Ryan’s Jazzy Ways
Ryan will allow them to sprinkle his nuts.
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05.11.07 SG #206 A Dead Baby Works
The only thing that doesn't make me bored. Love, God.
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05.07.07 SG #205 The Abortion Cast
My abortion.
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05.03.07 SG #204 Attention Replicator
We didn't hire our tactical officer to sit on his butt when he's threatened!
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04.29.07 SG #203 My Little Ponae
An exclusive interview with Alec Baldwin.
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04.25.07 SG #202 Lt. Heinie Reporting for Doodie
God says homosexuality is wrong unless, of course, you're in Dubai.
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04.20.07 SG #201 The 200 Video Epiversary | Play in Popup.
Prepare to embark on a Soccergirl, Incorporated journey through time out of mind and space incarnate.

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04.13.07 SG #200 An Extended 200th Epiversary
Dedicated to my hero, Kurt Vonnegut (both late and great).
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04.10.07 SG #199.5 Brother Love’s Soccergirl At Podcamp NYC | Play in Popup.
So I haven't finished the 200th episode yet... So what!? Wanna fight? It'll be out on the 13th, promise!

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04.05.07 SG #199 Human Pupa
Take note corporate America! Everything's better fortified with baby puke.
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03.30.07 SG #198 Two Short Films | Play in Popup.
Color Me Burkha and Post Traumatic Pussy Disorder

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03.26.07 SG #197 Space Eggs
Don't forget to get the space eggs for the om-a-let.
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03.22.07 SG #196 The Smurfs (uncut)
(uncut)
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Ancestor | Play in Popup.
by Scott Sigler

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03.18.07 SG #195 Smurf Love, Brother
A Buttery Little Schoolboy (for you to french).
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03.14.07 SG #194 That Baby’s Daddy | Play in Popup.
Anna Nicole ended up paying me for sex.

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03.10.07 SG #193 A Stringalong Golfer
It's all metaphorical, obviously.
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03.05.07 SG #192 You Can Lick a Cop’s Asshole
Ryan didn't say poo-poo, he just said poop, but Jake definitely said poo-poo.
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03.01.07 SG #191 Soccergirl and Ryan P. Do Vermont (part three) | Play in Popup.
The Eastern Spiny Soft Shell Turtle looks like Baron Harkonnen from the Dune movie.

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02.27.07 SG #190 Megamist
I'd like to wake up someone else in the middle of the night crying like an idiot, but I'm a megamist. I married myself.
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02.23.07 SG #189 Elephant Rape: Often in the Butt
A new song by The Calculus!
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02.19.07 SG #188 Soccergirl and Ryan P. Do Vermont (part two) | Play in Popup.
I got microwaves measured in microwaves showing me ways to save giving me coupons!

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02.15.07 SG #187 Didgeridon’t
By "totally radical" I mean politically rather than surfer, although sometimes the twain meet... just look at Keanu in Point Break.
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02.12.07 SG #186 Soccergirl and Ryan P. Do Vermont (part one) | Play in Popup.
Zazztastic!

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02.07.06 SG #185 How Am I Not Myself?
and what are these animal hands?
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02.03.07 SG #184 Mag Neat-o!
The streaming graphics and pumping din of baselines from walls of stacked television monitors at Costco experienced a momentary lag, a wall of snow that jolted shoppers from the foolish, thoughtless stupor they enjoyed with passive acceptance on every other day.
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01.30.07 SG #183 Bienvenudos America
She was about to close her eyes and spaz her duster arm around, when...
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01.26.07 SG #182 Sex: It’s Probably How You Got Here
You sound unsoothing and also pretty chalky.
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01.22.07 SG #181 Your Dying Mother | Play in Popup.
Dear Cindy, I am your dying mother.

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01.17.07 SG #180 Get Up On My Nerts
Did I ever tell you about the time I went to a martial arts banquet and came home with a vagina in my head?
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01.12.07 SG #179 That Dog Pisses Me Off
I wish Showbiz Dad could by my dad, but he's so hot that I'd be embarassed.
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01.07.07 SG #178 Added Pukey Flavor
Vomitol Toothpaste! Now with APF.
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01.01.07 SG #177 Blood Burgers
There *are* no waters in Casablanca. I was misinformed.
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12.26.06 SG #176 Boxing Day Bathcast
A short update... tiding you over with tidings.
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12.22.06 SG #175 A Soccergirl, Inc. Christmas, 2006 | Play in Popup.
You must have a computer brain or something!

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12.18.06 SG #174 Stuffryans
Fruit salad stuffryan is one of my favorite kinds of stuffryans.
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12.14.06 SG #173 In a World World | Play in Popup.
IN A WORLD where this IN A WORLD trailer is the only WORLD they know...

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12.10.06 SG #172 Power Ups!
Shaved balls are like prickly chicken skin... I really don't want to rub my tongue on that.
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12.06.06 SG #171 Dear Aliens
While I can't speak for everyone, I come in peace.
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12.03.06 SG #170 Nine Guts
and one gut would be bad enough!
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11.29.06 SG #169.5 The Secret Episode
Bathcast with Smurf porn
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11.28.06 SG #169 Smurf Porn Bathcast | Play in Popup.
The Secret Episode

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11.24.06 SG #168 Masturbators Around Every Corner
Thanksgiving Boxing Day is whack.
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